CHAPTER 1

"Lulu. What you are doing is wrong. You don't know how those animals operate."

"Come on, Jase. I see where you are coming from but really what harm could there be."

"Lulu, they cannot be trusted."

"I trust Johnny." Lulu said with a sigh. She felt like she always had to make Johnny he good guy to everyone these days. Everybody was warning her that he will ruin her life. Johnny will do this, Johnny will do that. The cycle just kept going and she wasn't in the mood to do it today with Jason. She expected Jason to take the news better than Lucky and Nikolas. But she bet Jason wouldn't react the way Lucky reacted. Noone would. When Lucky found out he was yelling every insulting thing he had ever thought of. He even kicked her out of his house. But Jason wasn't like that. He, surely, was angry but he wouldn't let his anger get the best of him.

"He may not hurt you physically but he will emotionally." Jason said sternly.

"Jase, why can't you just be happy for me? I am having a baby. Like it or not, Johnny is a part of me and this child now." Lulu said with a hint of happiness in her voice. Ever since she found out all she was doing these days was smiling and radiating with happiness. She even managed to get Jason smile. Her brother never smiled unless he was happy. But the smile from his face dropped as fast as he heard 'Zacchara' and 'baby' mentioned in the same sentence.

"I am happy for you. It is just that I don't want you to lose your life to Johnny when you two get married."

"Jason," Lulu said with a soft smile on her face as she walked towards him, "I love Johnny. He loves me too. And we are going to raise this baby together. And I would really appreciate it if my brother was there to teach this little guy," Lulu said as she took his hand and placed it on her stomach, "things me and Johnny wouldn't be able to teach him or her." She finished. Jason looked at her and smiled.

"But don't expect me to teach baseball or tie pigtails with pink bows." Jason stated with a serious expression. Lulu laughed.

"That's Johnny's and my job." She said with a glowing with a smile. Jason embraced her in a hug.

"I really am happy for you. I am also proud to have a sister like you, even though were not siblings biologically, you will always have a special spot in my heart." Lulu smiled.

"Thanks Jase."

"So, have you two set a date?" Jason asked as he pulled away from Lulu. Lulu walked to the couch with Jason right behind her. She plumped onto the couch so hard that Jason gave a worried look. It didn't go unnoticed with Lulu.

"Relax. Jase. Nothing is going to happen. So don't walk on eggshells around me." Jason sighed a breath of relief. Lulu motioned Jason to sit down. "As a matter of fact, we have set a date." She replied simply.

"And?" Jason asked with a curious expression.

"And…" Lulu continued with a soft smile "We chose January 17." Lulu looked to Jason who had an amazed and hopeful look on his face. Love just shone through him.

"Emily's birthday." Jason said with astonishment in his voice. "Lulu, are you sure. You don't have to do it for me."

"No. Jase, I wanted to. I know how much Emily meant to you. She meant a lot to me to. I hope it's alright with you." She said biting her lower lip in anticipation.

"Lulu. Yeah. It is an honour." Jason said reassuringly to Lulu. Lulu quit biting her lip.

"Now. I have something to ask of you."

"What might that be?" He asked.

"I was hoping you might like to walk me down the aisle." She said going back to her habit of biting her bottom lip when she was nervous. Jason flashed a grin.

"I wouldn't like to. I would love to." Lulu pulled Jason into another hug. He pulled away getting a funny feeling all of sudden.

"What about Luke. Shouldn't he walk you down?"

Lulu smirked. "You know how Luke is. He would buy the first pair running shoes he'd see and grab a couple of bottles of scotch and run to the town, correct that, country farthest from Port Charles if I asked him."

Jason smirked.

END OF FLASHBACK

"Mommy. Mommy." Lulu felt someone poking her in the dark. She opened her eyes and saw a petite figure leaning over her on the huge bed. She groaned as she got out of bed and turned on the lights. She looked to the alarm clock on her nightstand and it read 2:36 a.m.

"Joshua. What's wrong? Honey, why aren't you in bed?" Lulu asked with her eyes barely able to make out he small boy.

"Mommy. I had a bad dream." He said pursing his lips. Wow. He amazed her everyday. Whenever she looked at him she felt as if she was looking into a mirror. He had blond hair, hazel eyes and a nose like Lulu. But his lips, cheeks, and chin were all Johnny. For a 4 year old he was mature for his age. Too mature if you asked Lulu. He would notice when Lulu forced a smile after talking to Johnny on the phone. He always sensed something was wrong between the two. But still, they always loved him and gave all their attention to him.

Lulu sat back down on the bed and stroked Joshua's hair.

"What kind of bad dream?" Lulu asked him.

"You and daddy fighting." His words struck Lulu in the heart. She knew he heard her and Johnny argue hundreds of times. She was torn that her little boy was the victim.

"Hey, baby boy. Mommy and daddy sometimes don't agree with one another but that doesn't mean we don't love you. Baby, I promise you won't have any bad dreams about me and daddy." She said.

"How?" He asked looking up at her.

"You leave that to me. Now, how but my little spaceman go to sleep?"

"I don't want to sleep in my room by myself."

"You want to sleep her with me tonight?" She asked him. Joshua nodded. He lay in the bed and she tucked him in. She walked to the light switch but stopped as she heard Joshua's voice

"Mommy! Don't forget Rocky!" He exclaimed.

"Relax. I will go get Rocky." Lulu replied. Lulu walked down the hall to Joshua's room. She grabbed the stuffed teddy bear that was lying on the bed and walked back to her room. Joshua was waiting for her to come back. She smiled at his excitement.

"Here you go baby." She said as she handed him his teddy bear he named Rocky. She turned off the lights and lay next to Joshua. He snuggled next to her. She kissed the top of his head and just lay there stroking his hair.

XXXXX

Lulu couldn't fall asleep at all. Joshua was sleeping soundly. Lulu figured he was in 'candy land' in his dream because he kept mumbling candy in his sleep. She was worried about the fact that her child was having bad dreams that had her and Johnny in it and she was worried with the fact that Johnny still wasn't home. Earlier that day he said he had 'business' to take care of. Usually, in the mob world that meant to mind your own business. Lulu, born a Spencer, always asked too many questions regarding the business. Well, it wasn't her fault she was always curious. It was just a gene she picked up from her family. Well, Johnny was never good at 20 questions. Every time she asked him something about his business such as "What time are you coming back from work?" or "What is going wrong for you at work?" he would shoot her down by saying to watch their son and forget about asking those questions again. It angered her to the core that he always made decisions for her. She just wanted a normal marriage. Is that to much to ask of him?

Lulu's thoughts were cut short when she heard the front door of the penthouse shut with a loud thud. She got up and put on her night robe and glanced to see if Joshua was still asleep. It confirmed to her that he was still asleep because he mumbled lollipop in his sleep. She slowly slipped out of the bedroom and shut the door behind her only leaving an inch open. She made her way down the hall and she stopped at the top of the steps. There he was sitting on the couch with his head in his hands. She made her way down the steps and finally reached the bottom.

"Johnny?" She asked in a low tone of voice. He looked up to see her. Lulu could see he had a small gash on his forehead. She made her way to the couch. Johnny moved slightly over and she sat down.

"What happened to you?" She asked with concern.

"Lulu, go back to bed." He snapped. Lulu was taken back at him. He put his head back into his bed.

"Don't tell me what to do." She spat back at him. "I am not some wife you can toy around with. I didn't marry you so I could stay at home and clean. I surely didn't marry you so you could ignore our son."

"Lulu. Go back to bed!" He yelled at her.

"Lower your voice. Joshua is sleeping and I don't want him to wake up. Now tell me what happened." She was determined to get an answer from him.

"I am not going to fight with you tonight."

"Damn right you are not. Did you know that while you are out doing the world some kind of favour by killing "business partners" your child is barely able to sleep because he has nightmares."

"What kind of nightmares?" Johnny asked.

"Us. We are his nightmare. Me and you fighting all the time."

"Lulu. I am not fighting with you. You just don't know how to drop something when I tell you to." He said getting up to walk to the fireplace.

"I tell you our son is having nightmares and somehow it turns out to be my fault?! God. Johnny? Do you hear yourself?" She asked with shocked voice.

"I didn't say it was your fault. I am just saying that you should drop asking questions about the business. I can't get you involved into it. You and Josh are already too much involved. You both have targets glued to your backs. I wouldn't be able to live with myself if anything happened to you guys." He said looking towards Lulu.

"I told you years ago. Danger follows me where ever I go."

"This is a different kind of danger, Lulu. And life isn't the same as it used to be years ago. We have a child, now. And it is not fair to him if he is in the middle of the danger."

"I understand that. But it also isn't fair to Josh, and even to me, that every time you get angry about something such as me asking what time you'll be back from a forsaken place, you go out on a drive. If you were to ask Josh which parent he is more fond of he will, and I promise you, he will say me. You know why, Johnny? Because, I am with him 24/7. He doesn't leave my side for 1 second. Would it kill you to spend time with him or me? Are we ever going to be able to sit down for 1 minute and just talk like normal people do?" If he didn't reply she was just going to lose it. He closed the gap between them until he was standing in front of her.

"Lu. You know that I love you and Josh." He said rising his hand up to stroke her cheek. Lulu pushed his hand away.

"Sure feels like it." She said sarcastically. Johnny smirked at her sarcasm.

"Haven't changed have you?" He said grinning. Lulu turned to him with annoyance plastered to her face.

"Excuse me? We've been married for 4 and a half years and now you notice I haven't changed." She grabbed the pillow from the couch and was about to throw it at him but Johnny grabbed her arm making her drop the pillow back down. She pulled her arm back to her side and looked up at him with the same look she gave him when he asked the question.

"It was a statement."

"Don't even start with me Zacchara!" She said pointing at him.

"You look gorgeous when you are angry." He said grinning.

"Hey? Hey, buddy! Don't you go turning the subject around." Johnny sat down on the couch.

"Lulu. Come on drop it. Would you?"

"Promise me that you will spend more time with Joshua."

"Lulu. I will. Okay? I have been busy these past few months." He said simply as Lulu sat next to him.

"How about now?"

"Lets just say I have a load of time, now that an issue has been removed." Lulu looked to the ground knowing what he implied to when he referred to the word 'removed'. She looked back up at him.

"How did you get that gash?" She asked as she got up and went into the bathroom to get a first aid kit.

"I got hit." Lulu's eyes widened. "No not that kind of hit. I got hit with a chair."

"That explains it." Lulu said as she put the washed the wound with disinfectant and a cloth. Johnny twitched a little causing Lulu to slightly fall on top of him. She was about to get up but Johnny put his arms around her.

"I really see myself enjoying these days off." Johnny said with a grin causing Lulu to smirk.

"Maybe in your dreams and a 5 star hotel. But certainly not in this house, dear. We wouldn't want our little boy walking in on us in an awkward position." She said grinning.

She got up and put a band-aid on the dry gash.

"I am going to bed." She said as put the kit away and began walking up the stairs.

"Can I join you?" He said grinning.

"Sorry. Child in our bed." She said giggling.

"Maybe next time." He said smirking.

"Like I said, in your dreams or a 5 star hotel room," Lulu said as she walked back towards the room, "Good night. Oh yeah, don't let the couch bugs bite." She waved him goodbye. He just sat on the couch grinning. He laid down and fell asleep.