Disclaimer: as useful as tits on a bullfrog, but needed any how.
Sailor Moon was created by Naoko Takeuchi, Oh My Goddess! characters
were created by Kosuke Fujishima and they belong to who/whatever entity
that's associated with them. Anything else belongs to their respective
creators.
Flames will be answered with either Evangelion mindfuck episodes, bad
DS9 & Voyager episodes, Rocket Attack USA, Rabid Barnies, or the
complete run of BGC2040.
Feedback 'n' C&C is good.
Untitled (Jeez, there's a lot of these ain't there?) By Q
Prologue
In a minor quiet street, in a shopping district somewhere, a person ran
into a power pole. Now, why is this important you may ask, other than
the fact that this individual looks somewhat different than the locals
but is dressed like one particular group of them?
Absolutely nothing!
Other than the fact that before this 'Salaryman' hit the power pole, he
wasn't truly existent there.
Sort of somewhat like the ability for a Hibiki to get lost: they're
there one moment, but you turn your back and they're gone.
Out there somewhere, Sailor Pluto is having Exadren headache #1 'There
is a threat to the timeline.'
"Aye, me achin' 'ead! What the flonq hit me?" was his first waking
statement. "Ah! Right, I must have walked into a pole," was the next
thing he said when he could make out the pole, shortly followed by,
"What the hell happened to my clothes? Where's my trench? Why am I
wearing a friggin' suit?" upon noticing his clothes. Finger snapping
just brought out the cry of "No powers!"
"Right, I've had enough of this," he said once he had enough of angsting
on the ground, (Angsting is best done in dark places or on rooftops. see
Bat-family, X-teams and Angel for examples.) and walked away from his
insertion point.
Sailor Pluto's migraine just jumped to Exadren headache #13 'I can't
locate the threat.'
"I'm lost, I've got no powers and I'm wearing a suit. What do I do?" he
said puzzled, light bulb time. "Ask a local of cause." Picking a likely
candidate at random, "Excuse me, sir. Can you help me with some
enquires?" He asked a Salaryman on a lunch break in his best authority
voice.
"I suppose so, Mr?"
"Agent Black, FBI," He replied while flashing freddy*.
"FBI, you're a bit out of your way."
"Yeah, I know, but you know how it can be, we go where we are told to
go, Mr..."
"Shirow Kenji."
"Well," 'Agent Black' took a moment to work out the name of his
volunteer. "Mr. Shirow, I'm investigating weird occurrences here in
Nekomi."
"Nekomi?! Jeez, you are lost. This is Juuban. Nekomi's miles away."
"What the--! Those damn bastards! My lift told me that this was Nekomi.
Oh well, it could have been worse, they could have dumped me in Nerima."
"That's true, Nerima," Shirow replied shuddering at the word Nerima.
"Thanks for your help, Mr. Shirow." Black said before heading off
towards a payphone.
[What an odd gaijin,] Shirow thought before resuming his daily grind.
***
[Juuban, why is that familiar?] he thought while wandering. He had
checked his pockets for ID and had come up with a wallet with a Drivers
licence and credit cards in the name of Roger Darkholme, a some large
denomination Yen notes, about a thousand in US dollars. As well as a US
passport in the same name and a set of keys and passcards for something.
[Who cares! Pocky, cheap anime 'n' manga, a map, a guidebook and a room.
I'll be right.]
A quick glance around where he was walking to him just seemed to be a
normal Japanese street with a poster advertising a Sailor V movie in a
shop window and a Jewellery shop with a sign saying OSA-P. "Hang on a
sec?! Sailor V movie poster? Sailor V: The movie starring Minako Aino as
Sailor V. A jewellery shop named the OSA-P. I'm in Juuban-ku, Tokyo. In
the words of Dr. Henry McCoy: 'Oh my stars and garters!'. I'm absolutely
screwed! TOLTIIR THIS IS ALL YOUR FAULT!"
***
At Mimir's Well, the Elder god in question sneezed and began channel
surfing on a pool to find the problem.
"What's up?" Urd asked him.
"I'm not quite sure. It could be a disturbance in the Force, or it could
be my lunch disagreeing with me."
"Ah, one of those."
Random scenes appeared in the pool.
*Fractal screensaver static*
"MOON TIARA ACTION! Dusted."
*static*
"Jeez, Ryoga, by the time you leave there won't be a pig left in
Baringgen." Ryoga turned a interesting shade of green. "Pig? What do you
mean?" "Well, where did you think the meat came from? Say, are you
alright? You look kinda ill."
*static*
"We're all gonna die!" "Rattrap!" "I know: Shut up."
*Static*
"Ahem, yes, Kasumi Tendo. She is reported to be in the company of a
smuggler and one Ranma Saotome..." "WHAT?" shrieked Ukyou, jumping out
of her chair. "WHERE? WHERE? KILL!"
*Static*
"Sailor Gallifrey, make up!"
*Matrix static*
"All your base belong to us!"
*static*
Ranko lifted the henshin stick and called: "Sun Star Power, Make Up!"
*Cabbit Static *
"Spending money?" Washu rolled her eyes. "How do you think I manage to
keep Ryoko swimming in sake?" "Mine," Ryoko beamed, with her friend Mr.
Tail firmly in hand.
*The Bleed Static*
"Nope, but at least our visitors are gone."
"They could have at least cleaned the mess up before they left," Scott
complained while pointing out the condition the front of the mansion was
left in.
"Well, at least it wasn't blown up," Bobby commented, everyone glared at
him. "I know, I know! Don't say that, 'cause someone like the Marauders
or 'Pocy lips' might just come along and do it."
*Static*
"TOLTIIR THIS IS ALL YOUR FAULT! Let see who else can I blame? Q THIS IS
ALL YOUR FAULT! Jeez, this is fun I can see why Ryoga does it now.
CARROT THIS IS ALL YOUR FAULT! JESSE WILLEY THIS IS ALL YOUR FAULT!" A
Salaryman suited figure with a vague resemblance to a certain fic author
cried to the heavens.
~~~
"Toltiir, I believe you've found the problem."
"Yes, well does anyone recognise the timeline? It seems that I've picked
up an unlisted one," Toltiir said while locking the pool to this time
line.
"It looks like a Sailor Moon universe," Someone commented.
"Who's Jesse Willey?"
"A minor prankster in a Snowflake realm," Coyote replied. "The Cabbage-
wielding Angel of death they call him."
"Cabbage-wielding Angel of death?"
"One of his weapons of choice."
"Ah!"
"Trust a trickster would know about him," Urd muttered while locating
another bottle of Sake not noticing Skuld porting in.
"Urd, what's kept you?" Skuld said as she stormed over to Urd. Mallet
poised, ready to strike. "Belldandy's got dinner on the table and it's-
-Hey, what's grandpa doing there?"
"Grandpa?" A bunch of puzzled gods, goddesses and other semi-phenominal
cosmic beings chorused.
"You've got the wrong Urd, Skuld. Have you checked the Lord of the
Dances' bar for your Urd? And that's not grandpa."
"Be-da! So what if he's not your grandpa, he's my grandpa!" Skuld yelled,
before leaving by her porthole.
"It doesn't matter what timeline she comes from, Skuld's still a brat."
"Say, Urd?"
"Yes, Nabiki?"
"You did send Skuld after the correct Urd, didn't you?"
"How should I know? There is probably an Urd there getting drunk and
singing karaoke with Marller."
"Hey keep it down. It's just getting interesting!"
~~~
"Well, that was fun and pointless. Plaything of the gods. Feh! That's
Ranma's job. I wonder who could help send me home." Roger said while
walking towards the Crown arcade not noticing the four girls wearing
school uniforms coming out of the arcade, with two cats trailing them.
"Well, at least things can't get any worse?"
"Usagi!"
"Oh merde! I knew I shouldn't have said that." he said and began
muttering repeatedly "I'm dead."
"But," the blond with the odd hairstyle began. "I want an ice cream
now!"
"Usagi, we're going to be late."
"But, Ami, Luna?"
"But nothing! We're late!"
"Usagi, we'll go for ice cream later."
"Besides, I'm sure Rei's got the latest issue of Utena hidden somewhere
in her room."
"Really! You sure, Makoto?" Usagi said, almost bouncing like a kid on a
sugar high. "Bwahh!" The Clutziness of the Moon strikes again, crashing
into someone trying very hard to avoid her.
"Ah! Oww! Yipe, it's Meatball head! This can't be happening! I'm
screwed. I must have taken the brown stuff. It's all a dream." Roger
said, taking the 'I'm crazy, leave me alone and don't Moon Halation me!'
route. Amazingly Miss Haruna and Luna use something similar to get over
Usagi induced nightmares.
To be continued?
* Flashing freddy, colloquial used by the Victorian Police for
displaying their ID badge.
Teaser for next chapter.
~*~*~
"Would you believe that I'm a Kami sent to save the population of the
world from being turned in to goo by a mad scientist?" Roger told them.
"I find that quite hard to believe," Rei said in response.
"Would you believe that I'm an alien from Zeta Cygni sent here to steal
the souls of juvenile human females?"
"No."
"Then how about I'm a secret agent sent to investigate a bunch of
Lunarian cultists that plan to take over the world by removing
everyone's free will?" he said with a smirk, the two cats and the green-
haired woman appeared to be undergoing some sort of fit.
~*~*~
Sailor Moon was created by Naoko Takeuchi, Oh My Goddess! characters
were created by Kosuke Fujishima and they belong to who/whatever entity
that's associated with them. Anything else belongs to their respective
creators.
Flames will be answered with either Evangelion mindfuck episodes, bad
DS9 & Voyager episodes, Rocket Attack USA, Rabid Barnies, or the
complete run of BGC2040.
Feedback 'n' C&C is good.
Untitled (Jeez, there's a lot of these ain't there?) By Q
Prologue
In a minor quiet street, in a shopping district somewhere, a person ran
into a power pole. Now, why is this important you may ask, other than
the fact that this individual looks somewhat different than the locals
but is dressed like one particular group of them?
Absolutely nothing!
Other than the fact that before this 'Salaryman' hit the power pole, he
wasn't truly existent there.
Sort of somewhat like the ability for a Hibiki to get lost: they're
there one moment, but you turn your back and they're gone.
Out there somewhere, Sailor Pluto is having Exadren headache #1 'There
is a threat to the timeline.'
"Aye, me achin' 'ead! What the flonq hit me?" was his first waking
statement. "Ah! Right, I must have walked into a pole," was the next
thing he said when he could make out the pole, shortly followed by,
"What the hell happened to my clothes? Where's my trench? Why am I
wearing a friggin' suit?" upon noticing his clothes. Finger snapping
just brought out the cry of "No powers!"
"Right, I've had enough of this," he said once he had enough of angsting
on the ground, (Angsting is best done in dark places or on rooftops. see
Bat-family, X-teams and Angel for examples.) and walked away from his
insertion point.
Sailor Pluto's migraine just jumped to Exadren headache #13 'I can't
locate the threat.'
"I'm lost, I've got no powers and I'm wearing a suit. What do I do?" he
said puzzled, light bulb time. "Ask a local of cause." Picking a likely
candidate at random, "Excuse me, sir. Can you help me with some
enquires?" He asked a Salaryman on a lunch break in his best authority
voice.
"I suppose so, Mr?"
"Agent Black, FBI," He replied while flashing freddy*.
"FBI, you're a bit out of your way."
"Yeah, I know, but you know how it can be, we go where we are told to
go, Mr..."
"Shirow Kenji."
"Well," 'Agent Black' took a moment to work out the name of his
volunteer. "Mr. Shirow, I'm investigating weird occurrences here in
Nekomi."
"Nekomi?! Jeez, you are lost. This is Juuban. Nekomi's miles away."
"What the--! Those damn bastards! My lift told me that this was Nekomi.
Oh well, it could have been worse, they could have dumped me in Nerima."
"That's true, Nerima," Shirow replied shuddering at the word Nerima.
"Thanks for your help, Mr. Shirow." Black said before heading off
towards a payphone.
[What an odd gaijin,] Shirow thought before resuming his daily grind.
***
[Juuban, why is that familiar?] he thought while wandering. He had
checked his pockets for ID and had come up with a wallet with a Drivers
licence and credit cards in the name of Roger Darkholme, a some large
denomination Yen notes, about a thousand in US dollars. As well as a US
passport in the same name and a set of keys and passcards for something.
[Who cares! Pocky, cheap anime 'n' manga, a map, a guidebook and a room.
I'll be right.]
A quick glance around where he was walking to him just seemed to be a
normal Japanese street with a poster advertising a Sailor V movie in a
shop window and a Jewellery shop with a sign saying OSA-P. "Hang on a
sec?! Sailor V movie poster? Sailor V: The movie starring Minako Aino as
Sailor V. A jewellery shop named the OSA-P. I'm in Juuban-ku, Tokyo. In
the words of Dr. Henry McCoy: 'Oh my stars and garters!'. I'm absolutely
screwed! TOLTIIR THIS IS ALL YOUR FAULT!"
***
At Mimir's Well, the Elder god in question sneezed and began channel
surfing on a pool to find the problem.
"What's up?" Urd asked him.
"I'm not quite sure. It could be a disturbance in the Force, or it could
be my lunch disagreeing with me."
"Ah, one of those."
Random scenes appeared in the pool.
*Fractal screensaver static*
"MOON TIARA ACTION! Dusted."
*static*
"Jeez, Ryoga, by the time you leave there won't be a pig left in
Baringgen." Ryoga turned a interesting shade of green. "Pig? What do you
mean?" "Well, where did you think the meat came from? Say, are you
alright? You look kinda ill."
*static*
"We're all gonna die!" "Rattrap!" "I know: Shut up."
*Static*
"Ahem, yes, Kasumi Tendo. She is reported to be in the company of a
smuggler and one Ranma Saotome..." "WHAT?" shrieked Ukyou, jumping out
of her chair. "WHERE? WHERE? KILL!"
*Static*
"Sailor Gallifrey, make up!"
*Matrix static*
"All your base belong to us!"
*static*
Ranko lifted the henshin stick and called: "Sun Star Power, Make Up!"
*Cabbit Static *
"Spending money?" Washu rolled her eyes. "How do you think I manage to
keep Ryoko swimming in sake?" "Mine," Ryoko beamed, with her friend Mr.
Tail firmly in hand.
*The Bleed Static*
"Nope, but at least our visitors are gone."
"They could have at least cleaned the mess up before they left," Scott
complained while pointing out the condition the front of the mansion was
left in.
"Well, at least it wasn't blown up," Bobby commented, everyone glared at
him. "I know, I know! Don't say that, 'cause someone like the Marauders
or 'Pocy lips' might just come along and do it."
*Static*
"TOLTIIR THIS IS ALL YOUR FAULT! Let see who else can I blame? Q THIS IS
ALL YOUR FAULT! Jeez, this is fun I can see why Ryoga does it now.
CARROT THIS IS ALL YOUR FAULT! JESSE WILLEY THIS IS ALL YOUR FAULT!" A
Salaryman suited figure with a vague resemblance to a certain fic author
cried to the heavens.
~~~
"Toltiir, I believe you've found the problem."
"Yes, well does anyone recognise the timeline? It seems that I've picked
up an unlisted one," Toltiir said while locking the pool to this time
line.
"It looks like a Sailor Moon universe," Someone commented.
"Who's Jesse Willey?"
"A minor prankster in a Snowflake realm," Coyote replied. "The Cabbage-
wielding Angel of death they call him."
"Cabbage-wielding Angel of death?"
"One of his weapons of choice."
"Ah!"
"Trust a trickster would know about him," Urd muttered while locating
another bottle of Sake not noticing Skuld porting in.
"Urd, what's kept you?" Skuld said as she stormed over to Urd. Mallet
poised, ready to strike. "Belldandy's got dinner on the table and it's-
-Hey, what's grandpa doing there?"
"Grandpa?" A bunch of puzzled gods, goddesses and other semi-phenominal
cosmic beings chorused.
"You've got the wrong Urd, Skuld. Have you checked the Lord of the
Dances' bar for your Urd? And that's not grandpa."
"Be-da! So what if he's not your grandpa, he's my grandpa!" Skuld yelled,
before leaving by her porthole.
"It doesn't matter what timeline she comes from, Skuld's still a brat."
"Say, Urd?"
"Yes, Nabiki?"
"You did send Skuld after the correct Urd, didn't you?"
"How should I know? There is probably an Urd there getting drunk and
singing karaoke with Marller."
"Hey keep it down. It's just getting interesting!"
~~~
"Well, that was fun and pointless. Plaything of the gods. Feh! That's
Ranma's job. I wonder who could help send me home." Roger said while
walking towards the Crown arcade not noticing the four girls wearing
school uniforms coming out of the arcade, with two cats trailing them.
"Well, at least things can't get any worse?"
"Usagi!"
"Oh merde! I knew I shouldn't have said that." he said and began
muttering repeatedly "I'm dead."
"But," the blond with the odd hairstyle began. "I want an ice cream
now!"
"Usagi, we're going to be late."
"But, Ami, Luna?"
"But nothing! We're late!"
"Usagi, we'll go for ice cream later."
"Besides, I'm sure Rei's got the latest issue of Utena hidden somewhere
in her room."
"Really! You sure, Makoto?" Usagi said, almost bouncing like a kid on a
sugar high. "Bwahh!" The Clutziness of the Moon strikes again, crashing
into someone trying very hard to avoid her.
"Ah! Oww! Yipe, it's Meatball head! This can't be happening! I'm
screwed. I must have taken the brown stuff. It's all a dream." Roger
said, taking the 'I'm crazy, leave me alone and don't Moon Halation me!'
route. Amazingly Miss Haruna and Luna use something similar to get over
Usagi induced nightmares.
To be continued?
* Flashing freddy, colloquial used by the Victorian Police for
displaying their ID badge.
Teaser for next chapter.
~*~*~
"Would you believe that I'm a Kami sent to save the population of the
world from being turned in to goo by a mad scientist?" Roger told them.
"I find that quite hard to believe," Rei said in response.
"Would you believe that I'm an alien from Zeta Cygni sent here to steal
the souls of juvenile human females?"
"No."
"Then how about I'm a secret agent sent to investigate a bunch of
Lunarian cultists that plan to take over the world by removing
everyone's free will?" he said with a smirk, the two cats and the green-
haired woman appeared to be undergoing some sort of fit.
~*~*~