This is the sequel to my other story "Asleep at Heaven's Gates". I would highly suggest reading it before reading this story or else you might be confused. Luckily its not super long like some of my others so it won't take forever to read.

I also want to apologize for how long this took to publish. I had no idea I would take so long finishing my other story "I'll Be There". I hope everyone is still interested in reading this.

I know the epilogue for AAHG was set a week and a half after the shooting but this chapter actually begins only 3 days after, just so you know.

Reviews are always super welcome and encouraged :)

Chapter One

Emptiness. That is what Quinn Fabray feels. Nothingness. She is numb. Sitting on a bed that really isn't hers, staring at a deep red wall that once belonged to Mercedes' older brother. She has no home. She has no family. And as of four hours ago, she no longer has a daughter.

There's a knock on the door. Quinn doesn't move to answer or even make a noise.

Another knock. "Quinn, its Mercedes. Can I come in?"

Silence. Seconds go by before Mercedes realizes Quinn isn't going to answer. The handle turns before the door is opened and Mercedes is standing in the doorway, a look of utter concern on her face. She tries to hide it but Quinn can see right through her façade.

"Dinner's ready," Mercedes says.

"I'm not hungry," Quinn answers simply. She makes sure her eyes never make contact with her friend's. She doesn't want anyone seeing her like this.

"Are you sure?"

Quinn nods. Mercedes lets out an audible sigh and leaves, closing the door behind her. Tears well up in Quinn's eyes; she thought she had cried all she had left but apparently not.

Her phone vibrates. She doesn't even bother looking at it, knowing its Puck texting her for the hundredth time to see how she is. She knows she shouldn't be shutting him out like she is-she knows he's going through the same pain- but it's so much easier just to shut everyone out than to deal with it.

She must have dozed off because the next thing Quinn remembers is waking to another knock at the door. She sighs; why can't they get that she wants to be alone?

However, Quinn is surprised to find that it is not Mercedes who walks through the door, but Puck.

"Hey," he says. He's standing awkwardly by the door, hands in his pocket. "I needed to come by and see how you're doing."

She just stares at him, perplexed. How does he think she's doing?

Seeing Puck and remembering how alike him and Beth are brings a fresh batch of tears to her eyes. She knows she did the right thing. She had to of. But that still doesn't do anything to help the pain in her heart.

Before she knows it, Puck's at her side. He sits on the bed next to her and wraps her in his muscular arms- the safest place in the world, she used to call them. Now she's not so sure any place in the world is safe.

Tears continue to fall down Quinn's face at a rapid speed. She's crying so hard now she's gasping for breath. Her whole body shakes as she sobs. Puck holds her tighter, bringing her closer to his body. He's crying, too. She knows because she can feel the salty drops of liquid fall onto her scalp. She inhales his scent. It's the usual smell of dip and grass, with a bit of hospital mixed in from that morning. It calms her down a bit.

She's still sobbing, though. Loudly. For a second she's scared she might throw up, but it passes. She clings to Puck's t-shirt. So tight, even, that her knuckles begin to whiten. She knows she's probably pulling his skin, but he doesn't say anything. He just cries with her. He runs his fingers through her silky blonde hair.

"It'll be okay," he whispers in her ear. It tickles a bit, but she doesn't laugh.

She feels her eyes get heavy. She tries to fight off sleep, but it's inevitable.

The nightmares haunt her. Austin, he's everywhere. He's in the school pointing a gun at her. He's in her old bedroom, pointing a gun at her. He's even at Breadstix, pointing a gun at her.

She tosses and turns. And then, just as Austin pulls the trigger, she wakes with a start. She's caked in sweat. She feels a slight pressure on her arm and looks over to see Puck. He's asleep. His face, usually so confident, is turned downwards into a frown. He's shaking a little. He must be having nightmares, too.

She feels bad, just watching him in obvious pain. She shakes him, and he wakes with a start. "What's wrong?" he asks suddenly, still half asleep. He looks around, confused for a minute to be in an unfamiliar room before realization overcomes his face.

"Oh, I must have fallen asleep," he says.

Quinn nods. She's not surprised Mrs. Jones didn't wake him and have him leave. God knows they won't have sex after the day they just had.

They stare at each other for a while, feeling so helpless against the other's pain. Both of them are starting to really ponder whether they made the right decision or not. Is a right decision supposed to hurt this much? Quinn feels as if she'll never be whole again.

She looks down at her stomach. It's mostly flat again, but there's still a slight bump that used to be home to a much larger one. Quinn rubs it gently. For a second she forgets Beth isn't in there anymore.

Puck is staring at her; staring at her stomach as well. How could he ever forgive her for giving up the one thing in the world he loved the most? Their daughter, their tiny, precious, innocent daughter, she's gone forever. Well, to them at least. And maybe not forever, but for eighteen years or more. And when you're only sixteen years old, eighteen more years sounds like an eternity.

She knows he should go; he knows it, too. But he doesn't. He can't. Not until he knows she'll be okay.

They lie in bed together for hours, silent. Quinn can't bring herself to fall back asleep. Not even Puck can save her from the nightmares.

X-X-X-X-X

"Why aren't you at Regionals?" Quinn asks Mercedes the following morning.

"We decided to forfeit," Mercedes shrugs. Quinn knows Mercedes is pretending like it's not a big deal because she doesn't want to upset her even more.

"Why would you do that?"
"It just didn't seem right, without you and Puck out there with us." Quinn frowns. "But don't worry, Quinn, there's always next year."

Quinn can't even think about what's going to happen the following day, let alone the following year. But she just fakes a smile and nods.

"Kurt and I are going shopping today," Mercedes says. "Why don't you take a shower and come with us?"

Quinn shakes her head. "I'm not in the mood."

Mercedes puts her hand on Quinn's shoulders and gives her a gentle smile. "It's going to be okay, Quinn."

Quinn feels the sudden urge to yell at her friend. How could Mercedes know? She hasn't been through this. She doesn't know how Quinn feels. She doesn't understand; she never will.

"I think I'll go take a shower." Quinn walks away before she says something she'll regret.

She has no patience to wait for the shower to warm up. She steps into the cool shower and feels the massage of the water running down her bare back. She shudders a bit and waits for the water to warm up.

The water falling from the shower head only reminds her of her own tears. And of the pain she still feels. And at this point she convinces herself it's never going to leave. She is broken and will never be whole again.

Her shower is long. It takes a while before she can convince her body to step out of the warm water. She has scrubbed her body raw. She wraps the towel around herself, careful to avoid the mirror. Seeing the slight bump on her stomach and the stretch marks that are left will only upset her even more. Once her body is covered she wipes the fog from the mirror and stares.

Who is this girl in the mirror? Not her, that's for sure. This girl has large bags under her eyes, from her sleepless night. Her mouth is permanently tilted downwards. Confusion and hurt twinkles in her green eyes. This is not Quinn Fabray. This is a stranger.

Suddenly angry, Quinn jerks her head to the side. She quickly dries herself off and dresses in an oversized t-shirt and boxer shorts.

The quietness of the house envelops her as she steps into the hallway. No one is home but her. Mr. and Mrs. Jones are at work. Mercedes is at the mall with Kurt. Quinn is alone…again.

She doesn't know what to do. She doesn't want to do anything, really. She settles on the couch and flips aimlessly through the channels. Why does it seem that every damn channel on TV has a baby on it? A show about a new mother learning to raise a baby, a documentary about giving birth, a show about a mama lion and her new baby cubs. One channel after another Quinn is reminded of the life she will never have with her daughter. Frustrated and sad, Quinn turns the TV off. Her stomach is growling but she can't hold anything down. She decides a glass of water is the best she can do. The doctor told her to eat and drink plenty to keep her strength up. Well, at least she's doing one of them.

She still feels sore from giving birth with no medication or medical attention, but the doctor also assured her she would be just fine. "You're a very lucky girl, Quinn Fabray," he had said. It took all the restraint Quinn not to laugh in his face.

Yes, lucky that she had to give birth in her school's choir room with her whole Glee club there to watch and a psycho with a gun hell bent on killing Puck. Lucky that she blacked out from the pain. Lucky that Beth wouldn't have survived if Rachel hadn't known what to do. Lucky that she didn't have her baby anymore-that she was off to be with a happier, more capable family, who had a big yard for her to play in, a tree house, and even an older brother to watch out for her.

No, Quinn does not consider herself a lucky girl. But who considers themselves lucky? No one as far as Quinn's concerned.

She pictures Beth, two years old, large brown curls flying in the wind as her big brother chases her across the lawn. After letting her win for a while, he reaches her and she giggles furiously as he grabs her tiny waist and tickles her. But suddenly Beth is not laughing anymore; she's screaming. Blood runs down the side of her hips where fingernails are digging hard into her skin. Her older brother isn't holding there anymore, but is replaced by Austin. He takes the shining black gun out of the front of his brown hoodie and holds it to Beth's head. "Sorry, Beth, but your daddy must pay," is all Austin says before his finger pulls back on the trigger.

Quinn is awakened with a jolt; the "kick" as they say in Inception. He's dead, he can't get her; Quinn has to remind herself over and over and over again. The sun is shining in through the windows in the living room where she was asleep on the couch. She must not have been asleep long because it is still afternoon and Mercedes has not come home from the mall yet. Quinn looks at her hand and notices it is shaking. How is she ever going to sleep again with these nightmares?

Mercedes gets home from the mall soon after Quinn awakens. Quinn offers to help her make dinner, but her attempt is half-hearted at best. As the family sits at the table to eat, Quinn pushes her food around, only eating every tenth bite of food. She feels bile in her throat and stops eating her meal completely.

She can tell Mercedes wants to talk to her after dinner; she just doesn't know what to say. Which is fine with Quinn because she doesn't know what to say either. So they don't say anything except good-night as they go to their respective bedrooms.

Quinn lies awake in bed until she can't resist another night of uncomfortable sleep in a room that is not even truly hers.

Review :)