Disclaimer; I do not own any of the characters in this story. They belong to Stephenie Meyers and Stephenie Meyers only.

Authors note; This is a new story that I came up with early hours in the morning. I hope you enjoy and if you've read any of my other fanfictions, this one is quite different but in a good way...I hope.

Hope you like it..and please, review. Let me know what you think :)

I never should have left him. He meant the world to me but I had to let him go. We had to go our separate ways. He wanted his life in Forks and I wanted my life in Phoenix. I didn't want to leave but I had to...I didn't really want my life in Phoenix and I 100% didn't want to end it with him...but I couldn't bear to even look at him after what had happened. I promised my father that I would never go back to Forks, that I would never step foot on the border, let alone speak to anybody that lived there...not even my own father or mother. I had shamed them and they would always be known as the parents of the girl who killed her beloved and beautiful. I didn't mean for it to happen. He was only 18...such a waste of a wonderful life and I loved him so much. He was there the day it happened too...my husband...he knew it was an accident but nobody else saw it that way and I couldn't live with him knowing what everyone else thought, surely if they thought it then he must have too. I can't even bear to say their names...it still hurt so much.

It was his birthday the day he had died. He'd said that he wanted to do something fun...something reckless. He was a quiet boy and never wanted to do anything dangerous. Me and his dad had argued with him trying to get him out of the idea of...cliff diving but he was adamant he wanted to do it. I now believe the only reason he had wanted to was because his friends always teased him about his personality and he wanted to prove them wrong. We finally agreed with him that he could do it as long as we went too and I taught him how to do it properly and safely being I used to do it all the time as a child with my best friend Jacob Black. We got to the top of the cliff above the sea and I explained to him how to do it and demonstrated jumping in before returning to the top of the cliff.

'Mom...I don't wanna do it' he told me once I had returned.

'After you've just made me do that? I've told you before I didn't want to ever do this again after what happened to Jake...I don't even want you doing it!' I lectured him. He huffed and moved to the edge of the cliff. I grabbed hold of his hand to stop him doing it, but his foot slipped and he fell. I managed to grab his arm as he held onto the rock. I pulled and pulled with all my might to save him and help him up but my hand began to lose his grip and he began to lose his grip on the rock. His dad who had wandered off returned to see me trying to pull our son up to safety and ran to help but it was to late we both lost our hold and he fell into the sea...that was the last time we saw him. His body was never found...lost at sea. Jacobs friends who were on the beach at the time said they saw me push him and let him fall...everybody believed them and hated me except for my love...but I was forced to leave. So that's exactly what I did...I packed my things that very night and left for Phoenix telling nobody and to this day I had never been back...the only person I has seen or spoken to was my younger sister Alice...who had tracked me down and came to live with me telling our parents she was studying at the local university here.

It had been 2 years since I had left him and still I couldn't say his name. I had got my life back on track and had started a business in art becoming famous for my work all around the world. All my pictures I dedicated to my husband, son and daughter although I never used their names, I always made a hidden message inside the piece of work. All of which had something to do with my life, with what I had been through. I was just finishing a canvas painting of a forest that represented my life, it started of as a happy, colourful forest with love and laughter but faded into a gloomy forest with darkness, and sadness filling it.

'Right I'm off now B!' Alice came running in with her bags. She was going back to Forks for a couple of weeks to visit our parents.

'Right, you stay safe and make sure you text or ring me when you get there. Okay?' I lectured, giving her a long hug.

'B! I'm 22, you don't have to worry' she moaned.

'And I'm 34 but you still worry about leaving me here alone' I laughed.

'Yes, I know but...'

'No excuses. It's still the same. You're my little sister, I'll always worry about you.' I confessed.

'Do you want me to say hi to Carlisle?' she smiled hopefully. I winced at his name. Carlisle was my husband. I shook my head. 'B, please! You can't throw away 22 years of marriage away! He misses you B, you can tell he does'

'Ally, me and C...Carlisle can never be together. I can't go back there' I whispered.

'He can come here!' She suggested suddenly.

'No Alice Swan he cannot come here! You must promise me you will never even mention my name to him? Promise me you'll never tell him you've seen me?' I begged.

'Fine! I promise!' She sighed in defeat.

'Good. Now go, you're going to miss you're flight!' I smiled, kissing her cheek and helping her carry her suitcases to the cab waiting for her outside. 'Love you Al! I'll see you soon'

'Love you too B!' she shouted through the cab window and waved as it drove away. As soon as she left I loaded up my computer and began searching the internet. I searched for Forks and up popped hundreds of pictures. Pictures of the police force, with the chief of police...my dad. Pictures of La Push beach. Pictures of my wedding day and others...and then a picture of my beautiful son with his friends after completing a race for charity. He was just like his father...he always liked giving to and helping others. After a few hours of looking at pictures and doing some Internet shopping my phone began to ring.

'Hey Alice! Did you get back okay?' I asked cheerfully making sure she knew I was fine.

'I told you to never speak to any of us again!' my fathers voice sounded down the phone. I chocked back a sob.

'You can't...you can't do that! Dad...please?'' I begged.

'You have no right to call me dad! You're nothing to me! I only ever had one daughter and that's Alice' he sneered down the phone before hanging up. I couldn't hold them in any longer, tears began to flow down my eyes and I threw my phone against the wall before curling up in a ball on the floor. The only family I had was Alice and now he had taken her away from me as well...just like he had taken Carlisle from me and even worse my beautiful baby girl Rosalie. She was only 4 months old when I left...I could have tried to take her with me but I had to get out of there. I was getting death threats, horrible comments and even my own family hated me...so I promised my dad I would go and never go back just like he and everyone else wanted.

I must have cried myself to sleep because what seemed like hours later, I was awoken by my phone ringing again. I checked the caller ID but it came up with a number I didn't recognise.

'Hello, Isabella Cullen speaking' I stated, whilst wiping my eyes.

'B, it's me Ally' she whispered down the phone. 'You need to come to Forks' My thoughts instantly turned to Rosalie...had something happened to her?

'W..what's happened Al?' I stammered.

'It's Carlisle...he's in hospital. I've been to see him and he thinks...he thinks your dead Bella. Dad told him you had died last week.' I gasped, how could he do something like that! He can hurt me as much as he wants but he cannot hurt my family. I heard a man shouting in the background and then heard Alice move the phone from her ear.

'Isabella...Isabella...is that you?' it was Carlisle, he sounded so lost, so hurt and confused...but I couldn't tell him it was me. I knew he would want me to go back and I couldn't...it would only hurt him even more than it already had. 'Isabella please say something? Is that you?'

'No...Isabella is dead' I whispered, choking back a sob before hanging up. It was true...the Isabella that Carlisle loved was dead...I wasn't her anymore.

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