Neither heaven nor hell
Box of punishment. Zero sighed as he opened his mailbox. A black neat box probably filled with commercial was lying on top of his morning paper. Why was this happening? He didn't care for Recruiting Day and yet he got things like this in his mailbox. Troublesome. Probably some idiot at the association had sent him this. He took his morning paper, the damn box and went to his apartment.
Zero placed his retrieved things on the counter and drank his coffee in front of the TV. He massaged his temples as he felt how a headache slowly but surely grew. He only drank half of his coffee and rose from the floor. Zero went to his cupboard, a chill crawled his spine as he realised that he had already taken the last pill in his medicine jar. When had he taken the last one? He had to survive the day without it. Zero glanced at the clock and saw that it was time for his daily walk in the park.
Since his car accident a few years ago he was forced to quit his hunter training and to live a life in peace. He hated it.
He grabbed his morning paper with him on his morning walk. He walked his usual route around the park. He said hello to the Ice cone-man, the old lady with the Chihuahua which Zero definitely thought that it looked like a rat in a leash. It was ugly. He sat down on his usual bench in a green oasis of plants and trees.
His headache was making him feel nauseous. He wished that he hadn't only drunk coffee for breakfast. He leaned back and closed his eyes to gain some control over his stomach. The nausea disappeared for now at least. He decided that it was probably best if he went home 'cause it would get worse in a couple of hours.
His heart beat like a fast drum and his pulse was fast. Sweat started to gather in his forehead. The sun shined but not enough to make him sweat from the heat of the radiating sun. He stood up from the bench to walk home but a sudden wave of dizziness made his whole world spin and he felt weak in the knees. He catch himself as he descended to the ground, panting heavily as if he had run a marathon race.
A silver haired prince stopped in front of him. Hurried steps sounded as his beloved twin brother came to his side. Still panting heavily, Zero looked up to meet his brother's worried gaze.
"Zero, are you alright?" Ichiru asked worried.
"No...I..." Was all Zero could say between his troubled breathing.
Ichiru helped Zero up on his feet and held him so that he wouldn't fall down again. He hugged him tight to his own body.
"Let's go home." Ichiru said and Zero nodded.
The walk to Zero's apartment felt long even though he walked the same route every damn day. Ichiru opened the door to Zero's apartment. He stopped by the door to take off his shoes. He helped Zero with his as he stood leaned against the wall for support. They went into the apartment. Ichiru helped Zero down onto the sofa and made him lie down with a pillow behind his head.
"Or did you want to be in your bed?"
"This is fine." Zero answered in a weak voice.
The attack had faded but he felt that his headache and nausea was still there. Ichiru covered his body with his blanket from the bed to make him comfortable.
"Have you eaten anything today?" Ichiru pointed at the half full coffee mug on the counter. Zero blushed he felt so embarrassed over that he couldn't take care of himself.
"I drank some coffee..."
"I've told you like a hundred times already Zero! You have to eat a descent breakfast and I guess that you forgot to buy more medicine and no it's gone." Zero dragged the blanket up over his head to hide his pink face.
"You're breathing as calmed down, that's good." Ichiru commented.
Zero knew that somehow Ichiru's presence made him calm inside almost drowsy.
"That's because I have my cute brother, taking care of me." He said.
Now it was Ichiru's turn to hide a blush that covered his face. Zero tried to sit up now when he was feeling better. Bad mistake. His whole world started to spin again and that feeling to throw up was back as well. The coffee table was approaching his face and he could only fear for how badly it would hurt when he hit the edge of the table. Strong arms hugged him to prevent him from falling any further.
"You really are a bigger idiot that I thought." Zero heard his brother say.
"I only wanted to-"His hand flew up to his mouth as the dry heaved. He tried to keep it down but it wanted to get up straight away.
"Are you really okay, Zero?"
"Uhm, yeah...Still a bit-" Zero tried to keep another one down."Nauseous."
"Just lay down and I will make you something easy to eat."
Ichiru pulled up Zero's head so that he looked the other teen in his eyes. He could feel Zero's warm breath in his face. He brushed aside Zero's bangs from his face and placed his own forehead on his brothers. Thank God, Zero didn't have a fever. Their faces where so close, more correctly their lips where close to each other. They weren't officially a couple but both of them had admitted that the where more than just brothers.
"You don't have a fever." Ichiru said to break the silence.
Zero stared into those beautiful eyes and was almost to claim those innocent lips as Ichiru pulled away. When Zero saw Ichiru's smile on his lips he knew that he was only teasing him. Ichiru patted on Zero's head and ruffled around his hair. Zero lay down again and Ichiru went to make something to eat.
"Is soup okay?" Ichiru asked as he went through the empty fridge in Zero's kitchen.
Zero closed his eyes to rest his mind. Ichiru assumed that his brother was okay with it so he took ingredients from the fridge and started to cook the soup. Zero wasn't sleeping, he was lost in an alternative dream world. The accident haunted his mind as soon as he rested. His brain mad him go through the scenario over and over again. This wasn't the worst part, the angst that filled him where worse. The fact that he, Zero Kiryuu, couldn't continue as a vampire hunter anymore was probably the worst punishment that anyone could inflict on him. Even death would have been more merciful.
A hand that pushed his shoulder woke him up from his painful memories. His apartment smelled like tomato soup and the warm hand on his shoulder was a proof that he was still alive. Ichiru's eyes had a worried, concerned look. Zero sat up in the sofa as he felt much better than before. He noticed his beloved brother's gaze.
"What? Don't look at me like that!"
"Do you still get those images from the accident replayed in your head?" Ichiru calmly asked.
"It's nothing." Zero answered. His brother looked at him with doubtful eyes.
"I promise, I'm fine." Zero clearly saw that Ichiru didn't believe him.
A big bowl of tomato soup was placed on the coffee table and his medicine beside the bowl. Ichiru went back to the kitchen to get Zero a glass of water. Zero took his medicine and a mouthful of water to get them down.
He looked at the bowl and smiled. It was his favourite soup and no other than Ichiru had made it for him. He picked up the spoon to taste the soup. It tasted wonderful, it was seasoned perfectly and the tomato was soft and juicy as it was supposed to be. Zero ate in silence as his brother watched him. Ichiru had a silly smile on his lips and was glad that Zero enjoyed his cooking.
Zero ate fast, apparently a little too fast, the trace of food on his one cheek as a evidence. Ichiru bent forward and brushed away the remains of the soup of his brother's chin. He brought the finger to his mouth and liked it away. Zero started at his twin, trying to keep his composure. It was when Ichiru put in his whole finger in his mouth that Zero raised from the sofa. He didn't want to take the risk of getting in to trouble with his brother involved. He put his bowl in the zinc and stayed there for a while. He fought the blush that came spreading. Warm arms encircled him suddenly from behind. Ichiru.
"I'm glad that you are feeling better now Zero." He said. A faint tremble came from his thin arms. Zero leaned in to the embrace and laid his arms on his brothers.
"You don't have to be so scared. I'm feeling better now." He reassured his other half.
"But I-"
"No, buts Ichiru. I'm fine."
Zero turned around and caressed that beautiful face of the brother of his. He wiped away the small tears from his eyes and kissed his forehead. Zero hugged Ichiru harder and both of them slide down on the floor. Zero brought up his hand together with Ichiru's and as their hands where in the air he stared in his twin's eyes.
"I'm here and I won't leave you. Okay?" Ichiru nodded but his eyes were still frightened.
Ichiru took down his hand and flipped Zero's so that his palm was against them. He traced the almost invincible scars on Zero's wrists.
"How do I know that you are still alive the next time I come back?"
"I promise. I won't leave you alone."
Ichiru took Zero's wrist and kissed his scar with light kisses. Then he did the same with the other one. Zero leaned forward and embraced Ichiru. The closeness between the boys was something that they both needed. Zero's suicide attempt last spring and his chronic disease that he had gotten as a result from the accident had tormented Ichiru like a knot in his stomach. Zero's thoughts of never going to be a vampire hunter anymore was something that haunted him daily. Both of them needed the comfort.
Zero started to whisper sweet things in his brother's ear. Ichiru blushed and melted in Zero's embrace.
"You are my everything. Without you I wouldn't survive and the light in my life right now is you, Ichiru." Zero bent back and stared into his brother's eyes. "I love you, Ichiru so much that my whole heart aches every time I am near you." Ichiru smiled wide. He was so happy that Zero felt the same way as he had all this time.
"I love you to, Zero. I always have."
Two mouths were pressed against each other and two tongues where battling for dominance. Zero won of course but that was only because of his hands where touching all over his twin's body, making Ichiru lose concentration.
"You cheater." He laughed between their kisses.
"Heey, I'm only making sure that you are feeling good in all areas." Zero defended himself with.
"And I can't stop you." Ichiru agreed with his lover.
They continued to sit on the very same spot, with their bodies close to one another. The closeness was all that they needed. As long as they had each other nothing could destroy them.
Amor vincit omnia.