In My Heart
Chapter One
Maybe I should start by introducing myself before I get into the crazy story of my life once I moved back to my hometown of Forks, Washington. It can be hard to keep up with at times so this is probably the best time to explain myself.
My name is Isabella Marie Swan, but everyone calls me Bella or 'Bells' like my dad, Charlie. I'm sixteen years old and I've lived the majority of my adolescents in sunny Phoenix, Arizona with my mom, Renee, and her new husband, Phil. I didn't have very many friends. Most of the kids there thought I was an oddball for my strange sense of humor and the fact that I was unable to tan. I'm not sure why, but no matter how much time I spent in the sun, my alabaster complexion didn't darken the slightest bit.
School is a no brained for me, but I have absolutely no idea what I'm going to do afterwards.
Right after the first semester of my sophomore year ended, I made the decision to move back to Forks to be with Charlie. This would give Renee the freedom to travel with Phil and I hoped it would be more interesting than anticipated, but I had no idea how much of an adventure it would be or how permanent of a stay it would be.
My story starts a week after my arrival in Forks. I had been welcomed my first day by Charlie and his best friends, Billy Black and Harry Clearwater. I remembered Billy and Harry from my childhood vaguely, but it was nice to have some people happy to see me. Billy and Harry had said they would have brought their kids to see me, but they were off doing their own thing. Billy's daughters who were a few years older than me, Rebecca and Rachel, had left the year before and his son, Jacob, was the same age as me. I didn't really remember him very well. I had latched myself onto Rachel and Rebecca as a little kid even though they were older than me. Harry's kids, Seth and Leah, had their own things going on. Leah was spending the day with some guy she had been dating for a while and Seth was being tutor in math. Leah was a year older than me and Seth was two years younger.
In school, I had actually made some friends. It was a little weird that most of the people who were hanging around with me were guys who were constantly asking me out. No guy had ever shown an interest with the exception of one that I didn't even want to think about, let alone ones that had no idea about who I was other than my name and that I was new. Angela Weber was a really nice girl as was Jessica Stanley. Lauren Mallory just hung around because Jessica was her best friend. Michael Newton and Eric Yorkie had become thorns in my side along with Tyler Crowley.
Angela guilted me into going on a trip after school to First Beach in La Push. Everyone was going surfing instead of myself and Angela. Sports was never my forte and Angela was more of a book worm. It was our job to make a bonfire.
I got picked up at my house after school by Mike and everyone was already piled in his van. He raced off to the beach which took a few minutes. I enjoyed a nice, light conversation with Angela as everyone else talked amongst themselves.
I sat in the sliding door of the van with Angela as the others got on their suits.
"Is that a new book?" Angela asked in her sweet voice with a tilt of her glasses and I nodded, showing her the cover of my little book.
"Yeah. I picked it up at a Half Price bookstore before I moved out here. Today is the first chance I will have to read some." Angela's eyes widened, I wasn't sure why though.
"I didn't think you were into reading that stuff?" I was really perplexed by this statement that sounded more like a question.
"What stuff? It's a romance novel." Angela giggled and shook her head.
"It's not romance. It's erotica. Carly Phillips is a sex novelist." I was disgusted and pushed the book away.
"Ew! What person would even want to write or read about that?" Angela rolled her eyes at me before pulling off her jacket, showing the long sleeved, purple thermal she was wearing.
"You're sixteen. You figure that one out." Angela teased and I rolled my eyes.
"I'm sixteen, like you said. Those kind of things aren't even on my mind." Angela frowned and I wasn't sure why.
"It's not wrong for someone who is sixteen to think about those things, Bella." Now, I got it. I felt terrible. My only real friend in Forks and I made her feel like crap because she probably wasn't a virgin.
"Have you done that before?" I asked as the other walked away and she nodded.
"I've been in a steady relationship for two years. What do you think?" Her smile returned and I relaxed.
"With who? It's not Eric, is it?" I was grossed out by the thought of Angela and Eric together. They didn't fit right together, but Eric was always trying to hang on her and acted a little like she was his girlfriend, with the exception of when he asked me out.
"God, no! I'd rather shoot myself." I laughed as she said this and I took off my jacket, wearing a black thermal like hers. We climbed out of the van and started to walk towards the surf. "My boyfriend's name is Embry. He lives on the reservation here." I thought it was pretty far to live from your boyfriend, if he lived ten miles away, but they made it work somehow if they were still together after two years. Most high school romances don't last more than a couple months.
I wouldn't know. I had never been in a relationship myself.
"Is he older or younger?" I inquired as she smirked.
"He's our age. All of his friends are except for Leah and Sam. They are seniors." I was surprised by the name. La Push wasn't a big reservation, probably only two hundred people living there. Could there possible be more than one Leah?
"Do you mean Leah Clearwater?" Angela's eyes widened as she laughed.
"Do you know her?"
"Charlie and Harry, her dad, are friends. I haven't seen her since I was little, though." Angela and I started to gather some driftwood. We laid it all strategically so the fire wouldn't wander from the small pit.
"Oh, I need to call Embry." She beamed and I shook her head with a smile on my face. I was happy she was so in love with this boy. I wished I could find someone I could get that kind of crazy over, but I doubted it would happen. I wasn't one of those girls who became like a lovesick puppy over some guy.
Angela pulled out her phone as I found a couple more pieces of wood.
"Hey, baby." She smiled as I guessed her boyfriend answered the phone. "We are at the beach. Everyone is in the water except for me and Bella. She's keeping me company and we are building a bonfire right now." I wasn't sure why she said my name like that, but maybe I was just hearing things. "Okay. Love you." She hung up the phone and smiled brightly. "Him and his friends are heading over here." I nodded, unsure why she was acting like she was hinting at something.
"Cool." We continued to chat at we struggled to light the drift wood on fire. After a while, I saw five people approaching from the corner of my eye and I looked up as Angela did the same. To one side was a man and a woman, walking hand in hand together. The girl had shoulder length hair and flawless Native American features and the man's hair was the same length as hers. They looked like the perfect couple in my eyes. Next to them was a boy with short hair then two with hair as long as mine.
It was the boy on the very end who caught my eye. His smile was heavenly. It sparkled and reached up to his eyes. His black, straight hair glisten in the withering sunlight and his skin had a slight shimmer to it. His russet skin was such a perfect shade, different from the others.
My heart sped as I saw this body and quickly looked away. How could I possibly have this sudden physical attraction and instantaneous connection to this handsome stranger who I had yet to even utter a single word to? It was bordering on unnatural.
I watched as the other man with long hair ran over with a big smile and scooped Angela up his his welcoming embrace. She shrieked with amazement as he kissed her happily. It was almost embarrassing to watch. This had to be Embry.
"Baby, put me down!" Angela protested and he sat her down before giving her a sweet kiss.
"Hey, gorgeous." She giggled before looking to me.
"Bella, this is Embry." Angela gave a quick introduction and I sent Embry a small wave as he flashed a bright smile.
"Hey, how you doing?" My southern accent stood out as I said this and his smile brightened.
"Hey, Bella. It's nice to meet you." I stuck my hands nervously in my pockets as I fought the urge to look at the boy that had caught my eye before. I was never a girl who gawked at s boy no matter how handsome he was. Why was this boy so different? "This Sam and Leah." Embry pointed out the couple and I gave them a kind smile. Leah released herself from Sam and gave me a big hug. I was not expecting this nor was anyone else for that matter.
"Welcome back, Bella." Her words were so heartfelt, they brought a smile to my face.
"Thanks, Leah." She released the hug and Embry looked at us perplexed.
"You two know each other?" Leah rolled her eyes with a huff.
"Of course. Everyone knows Bella Swan." I blushed and slightly bowed my head in embarrassment. "She was a frequent visitor to the reservation when we were little kids." I didn't expect Leah to remember me. I didn't really remember her all that much, but the warm yet not overzealous welcoming was much appreciated. Leah turned to the other two who had yet to have their introductions done. "Bella, this is Quil and Jacob." I got up the nerve to look up at the boy with the sunny smile along with the short haired boy and sent them a small, shy wave. I was sure my face had to be as red as a tomato from how nervous I was. The boy she pointed out as being Jacob gave a nice, big smile with a glimmer of appreciation in his eyes while Quil gave a sly smirk.
"I'm Quil Atera." She just introduced you and you had to spouted off your first and last name? Yup, you are an idiot. The others laughed at this kid's idiocy as Angela rolled her eyes.
"Quil, she ain't interested." Quil's eyebrow lifted in challenge of what Angela said.
"Does she have a boyfriend or something?" He asked. This kid had no shame whatsoever. Angela just got done telling him that I wasn't interested and he was here asking if I had a boyfriend as if I wasn't standing right there.
Suddenly, Tyler ran out of the water and jogged over to us.
"Sorry, boys, but this is my girl." He kissed my cheek and ran off to the van as I grimaced in disgust. Angela laughed before she spoke up in my defense.
"No boyfriend, but a bunch of guys from our school who can't grasp that…" she turned in the direction of the van and yelled. "SHE'S NOT INTERESTED!" I heard Tyler laughed as did everyone else standing around. I nervously bit my lip as Angela turned back around.
"That was very helpful." I muttered sarcastically and she gave a big smile.
"Hey! I am here to make sure them stop treating you like their shiny new toy." I nodded with a small smile as I noticed that Jacob was staring at me with that sunny smile of his. God, why did he have to be so cute? I gave him a shy smirk in return as Angela grabbed my arm. "Come on. Those boys are probably going to try to get us all wet once they get out. Let's put up our phones and grab our jackets." I nodded and followed her away from the crowd.
I was probably as flush as could be and I reached up to touch my cheek, feeling how inflamed it is.
"I saw how you were looking at Jacob." Angela nudged my shoulder with hers and I bit my lip.
"I don't know what you are talking about."
"Bella, I'm no fool. You could barely even look at him and, when you did, you started blushing. You think he's cute, don't you?" I shrugged a little and she laughed. "Aw!" Her arms hugged around my shoulders as she giggled in my ear. "Who would have thought? Bella Swan and Jacob Black?" My heart jumped as I realized what she had said.
Jacob, this Jacob which had me so nervous, was Billy's son. He did have some of Billy's features, but I wouldn't have guessed that he was the same Jacob that I grew up around.
I looked over my shoulder and saw he was staring in my direction while the others were chatting around him.
I quickly looked back as we got to the van. Angela and I threw on our jackets and put our phones down in the van. We closed the sliding door and slowly started to stroll back to the crowd who had now relocated to our bonfire pit that we still hadn't been able to get lit.
"Just so you know. I can tell Jake thinks you're cute, too. He doesn't get all goo-goo eyes and smiles for just anyone." I blushed as she said this and we made it back to the pit.
"Struggling to get it lit?" Jacob asked Angela and she nodded.
"Not everyone can be a pyromaniac like you, Jake." She teased him and he rolled his eyes.
"Please. I am not a fire bug just because I know how to light a bonfire." He extended his hand to Angela with an amused smirk. "Just give me your damn lighter and I'll have this thing lit in a jiffy." She handed him over the zippo she carried. He pulled out some paper from his back pocket and lit it with the lighter. He leaned next to the pit and shoved the paper under all the wood. This confused me. Why wouldn't he just light the lighter fluid we poured on the wood. This was just strange.
"Why are you doing it like that?" I asked softly and he chuckled before standing up, dusting the sand off his pants.
"You want it to burn up instead of down. Burning up makes the flame last longer and you don't have to worry about the wind or rain putting it out. Plus, when it starts going out, you can just throw more wood on it." Now, it made sense. No wonder he put it under the wood.
"Oh." Angela skipped off toward Embry and flung herself at him. I couldn't believe the display those two were putting on in front of everyone. "They always like that?" I asked and he glanced at them before grimacing.
"Sadly, yes. You get used to it after a while. I've been dealing with it for two years." I giggled before looking up at him from under my lashes.
"You poor thing." He chuckled. God, that brilliant white smile. I didn't know anyone who had such a pearly white smile such as his. I wondered if he had his teeth whitened.
"Just some friendly advice. I wouldn't be alone with those two. It can get pretty awkward." I flushed as he said this. I really hoped I never had to see those two in a compromising position. Jacob probably had if Angela and Embry had been together for two years.
"That bad, huh?" He made a disgusted face and I couldn't help, but laugh.
"Sometimes they forget others are around. I'll put it that way." I could see that. Their public display seemed a little over the top.
"I will make sure to keep that in mind." His smile brightened a little. It was just enough to make my knees weak.
"Charlie is your dad, right?" He asked and I nodded.
"Yup, that's right."
"You don't remember me, do you?" Nope!
"I don't really remember much from when I lived in Forks. I was only five when me and my mom left." I justified my fogged memory.
"Right. You used to hang out with me and my sister's at my house during the summer." I pretended I didn't know this, but I had already connected the dots. I knew exactly who he was.
"Oh, yeah. I remember. Billy is your dad, right?" He nodded with a bigger smile. I blushed as he did this. God, why couldn't I control the heat of my cheeks?
"Yup, that's right. You latched onto my sisters more so than me."
"Rachel and Rebecca, right?" He nodded happily.
"Yeah, Rachel went off to college last year in New York and Rebecca got married and moved to Hawaii." I nodded in response.
"Yeah, your dad mentioned that when he came by the house after I arrived." We talked for a while about different things. I found out he was a car nut and had rebuilt his own car. I never heard of anyone else who was sixteen that had this kind of dedication. He had to love his car to put that kind of time and energy into it, instead of saving his money for it.
Turns out, him and Embry were best friends and had been since the age of three when Stacey Call became friends with Jacob's mom, Sarah Black. The mention of his mother sent a pang through my heart. She was one person I remembered vividly. She was kind, caring, and generous. She had a fatal car accident right before me and my mom left Forks.
I don't know what I would do if my mom died suddenly like that.
"Hey, do you want to go for a walk? It's starting to get a little crowded." I giggled as he proposed this. I really liked talking to him. It was easy and carefree which was something I wasn't very used to. I'd only been able to hold an easy conversation like this with my mom and even that was embarrassing at times.
"Sure, yeah." He smiled big and we started to stroll down the beach. I caught Angela wink at me and I blushed as Jacob and I walked around a log. "How has your dad been?" I asked casually.
"He's good. He's been busy a lot with tribal business." He answered rather quickly with a level voice.
"What does he do with his 'tribal business'?" I teased a little with my voice and he chuckled.
"He's the head of the council which is really kind of like the government of the reservation, I guess. When I was little, they used to host a bunch of bonfires for the families of the council members where they would tell our legends." I looked to him with a tilt of my head.
"Legends?" I had heard about Native American legends, but I hadn't ever heard any myself. I was curious.
"Yeah. Dad calls them our histories, but they are just scary stories to tell around a fire. You'd really see a show at Second Beach on Halloween. My dad tells the story of origin of the council bloodlines and some seniors from the reservation school act it out as he tells it. It's really cool to watch." This was absolutely fascinating.
"Wow. That would be great to see. What is that story?" I inquired and he chortled lightheartedly.
"We aren't supposed to say anything about it unless it's among tribal members." This was downright suspicious.
"Why?" He shrugged as I flirtatiously glanced up at him from under my lashes.
"Don't know. My dad thinks our legends should remain secret." I snickered and clutched onto his arm.
"Come on. What harm could it do? Tell me, Jake." He flashed me a big smile before he caved.
"Alright, alright." He cleared his throat as I listened closely. "Okay, did my dad ever mention to you how our tribe is supposed to be descended from wolves?" He sported a mischievous grin as I gasped.
"What? Wolves? Like real wolves?" He nodded happily.
"Yup. That's the legend of our tribe." I nodded for him to continue, clutching his arm tight, and he smirked. "A long time ago, our tribe had a Chief named Taha Aki." He started off slow and seemed to lean more towards me. "Back then, our tribe had a very strange ability. We could go into what my dad calls 'spirit warrior mode' where we could leave our bodies and speak to those in the spirit world for guidance and ask for help scaring away threats to our tribe as a whole." This was very interesting and I was listening very intently. "Taha Aki went into spirit warrior mode to seek guidance of the Great Spirit and he was warned that a great evil with dark plans was lurching within the tribe. He was told he had to hurry back to his body before it was too late to stop this evil. It was already too late, though." His features sombered.
"When he arrived at his body, he witnessed one of his most trusted advisors slaughter Taha Aki's body then light him on fire." I gasped as Jacob said this.
"Oh, my god." He was a really good story teller. I wondered if it was something he inherited from Billy.
"Taha Aki quickly realized that this was the evil the Great Spirit spoke to him about, but it was too late for him to do anything about it. His body was gone and he could never rejoin it. He was now stuck in limbo. He couldn't move on while stuck in spirit warrior mode so all he could do is sit around and watch the devastation that struck the tribe in his absence.
"His advisor who betrayed him took over as chief and made a lot of bad changes for the tribe, claiming it was what he thought Taha Aki would want. Taha Aki's son didn't believe the new chief for a second. Though the new chief had banned the others from going into spirit warrior mode, he needed know if these changes were something his father would have wanted. As soon as he went into spirit warrior mode, Taha Aki told his son the truth of what had happened to him and that it was dangerous to be there with the false chief watching. Taha Aki's son tried to rush back to his body, but it was too late. The false chief had strangled him while he was in spirit warrior mode.
"He knew Taha Aki's son would know the truth and he couldn't risk him telling everyone what he had done." Wow. This story was really good.
"What did Taha Aki do?" He could see that I was very interested and it brought a big smile to his face.
"There was nothing he could do." I rolled my eyes at this.
"What kind of a story ends that way?" He snickered before rubbing my hand.
"I never said the story was over." Yay! "Taka Aki and his son ventured far from the tribe, knowing that any efforts they made the save the tribe would have catastrophic repercussions. They traveled for weeks until they came across a wolf that was much bigger than the average wolf. It was the size of a horse instead of a dog. This wolf could sense them there and it seemed too wise to be an animal.
"Taha Aki spoke to the wolf, but got no words back. He told the wolf about the issues at home and asked for his assistance. Though the animal did not speak, they felt his answer. The wolf offered for them to use his body to save the tribe from the evil false chief that was leading them into the ground." I was confused by this.
"Use his body?" Jacob nodded with a smirk.
"The wolf allowed Taha Aki passage into his body to control as his own. As a means to help, his son decided to stay out of the wolf, though he was also invited in. Taha Aki as the wolf ran back to the tribe. He wasn't sure how the wolf would be able to help him save his tribe, but he knew he had to try.
"When he arrived, the hunters of the village tried to hunt him down for they had never seen a wolf so massive. Taha Aki wasn't usually full of anger, but he was towards the villagers who were relentlessly pursuing him." I was practically on the edge of my seat for the story.
"What did he do?" I asked this question again and Jake had a devious smirk across his face.
"Let me tell the story, will ya?" I blushed as he looked at me with a goofy grin. "There was nothing for Taha Aki to do. His son, on the other hand, had an idea. Taha Aki had no control of his anger. His son knew that there was no way to get their people to see the truth unless he calmed down and he could not tell the wolf this with his father in charge of the wolf's body. Taha Aki's son made a split second decision to jump into the wolf's body to deliver this message to his father.
"The power of the wolf, Taha Aki's strong anger, and his son's calming, wise words to his father together caused all three to fuse together irrevocably." I gasped as he said this. I couldn't come up with this stuff no matter how overactive my imagination was.
"Fused?" He nodded.
"The wolf turned into the form of a man that looked like Taha Aki, had the intimidating presence of his son, and sported the power of the great wolf. He was taller with a much stronger frame, but everyone in the tribe recognized the man they saw before them.
"Their chief had come home and saved them from the terror of the rule of their false chief. The false chief was banned from Quileute lands and was bound to never enter his spirit warrior mode ever again." I had chills and they were good chills.
"Wow. You are pretty good at telling scary stories." He chuckled happily.
"Thanks. I try." He shrugged nonchalantly. When we noticed the darkness coming, we started to make our way back to the bonfire. "Why did you decide to move back to Forks?" He asked curiously.
"Well, my mom got remarried about four months ago." His eyes widened as I said this before he frowned.
"The guy an ass or something?" I quickly shook my head. I would never describe Phil as 'an ass'.
"No, nothing like that. Phil's actually really cool. He just travels a lot for work. My mom said she would stay home with me, but I knew it would make her sad to be away from him for so long so I volunteered to move back up here for a while." I realized I was still latched onto his arm and released myself nervously, fidgeting with the zipper on my jacket. I was so embarrassed that I had been clinging to him like that. He must have thought I was an idiot for doing that.
"What does he do?" He asked, seeming a little sad about something, but I didn't pry into what it was.
"He's a minor league baseball player." Jacob threw his head back laughing at this, his teeth glimmering in the twilight, but I didn't see what was so funny. "Why are you laughing?" He rolled his eyes.
"Just imagining someone our parent's age playing professional baseball. It's hilarious." I rolled my eyes at this.
"He isn't our parent's age." His eyes widened and his jaw slacked.
"What?" I nodded.
"Yup. He's only in his late twenties. You can say it. My mom is a cougar."
"Cougar, my ass. She's a damn cradle robber." I laughed at what he said and found myself clinging to his arm again, giggling into the sleeve of his jacket.
"I guess, you're right." He feigned hurt.
"I will have you know I am always right." I rolled my eyes and nudged his shoulder with mine, releasing my grip on his arm.
"Sure, sure. Like I believe that." He snickered as we made it back to the bonfire. Mike ran up to us, out of his wet suit and back into his regular clothes, as Angela and Embry strolled over, his arm slung over her shoulder.
"Bella, it's getting dark so we are going to head back. You ready?" I frowned as he said this. I really didn't want to leave, but I had no other way to get home. I didn't have a car and, even if I did, I didn't bring it with me.
"Actually…" Angela started as her and Embry stopped next to Mike. "My mom is supposed to be picking me up in two hours. Bella, if you want to stay a little while longer, you can come with us. It's up to you." She shrugged as if it was no big deal, but I could see in her eyes that she knew I wanted to stay because of Jacob.
"I think I'll hang out a little while longer. Thanks anyways, Mike." I tried to come off as being polite, but I'm sure my voice just sounded rushed. I felt a little bad because Mike kept saying how he wanted us to hang out a little while at the beach, but I had been clinging to Jacob the whole time. Granted, I didn't actually want to hang out with Mike, but he seemed sad about it. "I need to grab my stuff out of the van though. I'll be back in a sec." I started to walk towards the van and Angela was quickly by my side.
"Where did you and Jake run off to?" She probed and I blushed.
"Nowhere. We just went for a walk. We were just talking." I justified our absence, but really, there was no reason we couldn't have hung out at the bonfire with everyone else.
"Aw! You guys didn't escape just to make out away from prying eyes?" Angela teased and I flushed. The thought of kissing Jacob was nice, but I wasn't expecting it. I was ridiculously plain and Jake was just so wonderful on what I could tell so far.
"No!" I protested in horror of her thinking I was some slut for wanting to kiss him after just meeting him a few hours ago.
"Don't worry. I won't tell him that you want to suck his face." She teased me again. "He really likes you. I can tell." I just rolled my eyes. Why would Jake like some plain girl like me? I was nothing special.
"What would make you think that?" She giggled and started walking backwards for some unknown reason.
"Because, one, he can't stop staring at you." I flushed more as she said this. "Right now, he is talking with Embry, probably trying to concoct some plan of how to see you after we leave tonight." I refused to believe any of this until I had some tangible proof that her words held water.
"That doesn't mean anything." I shrugged it off and she scoffed.
"I have never seen Jacob like that about any girl and I've known him for two years. Embry has told me on many different occasions that Jake has never shown a single girl interest. I'll be honest. He had a lot of offers, but he just wasn't interested. It was so obvious that he has his eye on you and I wasn't the only one who saw it. Embry, Quil, Leah, and Sam all saw it. They were all wagering how long it was going to take him to ask you out and what your answer would be. I bet that he asks you out before we leave and you say yes." She teased with a lift of her eyebrow and I blushed, grabbing my phone from the van.
"I highly doubt he likes me like that." She rolled her eyes with a huff.
"Why? You two have been attached since he got the bonfire lit. Why don't you think he likes you?" I huffed before motioning to my whole body.
"Look at me. I'm nothing special. I'm simply plain. I highly doubt extraordinarily ordinary is Jacob's type." Her eyes widened as her jaw slacked.
"Are you serious? Do you really not see what everyone else does when you look in the mirror? Why do you think all of the guys at our school hound you when you walk down the hall? You are anything, but ordinary. Also, there is no one ordinary in this world. There is nothing normal about any person no matter how much they look stereotypical from the outside."
"You are very smart, funny, sweet, and you are beautiful, Bella. Jake sees it as does everyone else. You need to learn to see it for yourself." I didn't agree with her, but I nodded as if I did.
I saw Jacob smiling in our direction with that grin reaching up to his onyx eyes, his midnight strands, cascading over his shoulders. I knew my heart was in terrible trouble when it came to this boy, especially if Angela was wrong about him liking me.