Time to heal.
Hello!
I am not 100% sure if this will go anywhere, but if you guys like it then I think that maybe I could turn this into a multi-chapter story!
It's more Mike and Andrea as I have grown to ship them a lot! If this is a one shot, then it's more friendship, but if it turns into a multi-chapter then I plan on having it grow into a relationship.
This is completely un beta'd, so I apologise for any mistakes, if anyone feels they can help me out, then let me know!
-Andrea felt lost, she didn't know what to do or even think at this point. Mike is the same. But maybe together they could find a way to get through this and convince each other that healing takes time.
Enjoy!
Disclaimer – I own nothing.
Andrea knew a hundred showers would not make her feel clean. She'd just spent days in the jungle fighting for her own life as well as those of her fellow crew. The first thing she did when she got back on the Nathan James was shower. She knew the first thing she'd do when she got back to her cabin after eating would be shower. She knew on the outside, her body, that was clean, but it was her mind, the images that flashed before her eyes when she walked through the passageways alone. That was what she wanted to get rid of. She wanted to feel clean both physically and mentally.
Admittedly, she just wanted to wake up. She wanted so badly to open her eyes and see her room back on the naval base, she wanted to reach out and feel her husband asleep next to her. Andrea wanted to get up and walk through the halls of her home until she reached her daughter's room, she wanted to find Lily sound asleep surrounded by all her stuffed toys.
Andrea, much like everyone else, she assumed, wanted all of this to be a bad dream.
She snapped out of her thoughts when food was placed in front of her. As much as she knew she had to eat, and part of her wanted to, she just couldn't move. The sound of the young sailor across from her crying made it hard for any of them move.
She opened her mouth a few times to speak, but nothing came out. She had no idea what to say, or even what to think. They'd all been through so much, they'd lost almost everything, there was nothing anyone could say that would make the situation any better. The only 'happy' thought Andrea could come up with was that they were back on the Nathan James but that was all she had. She had no promises to give out. She would be lying if she said things would get better. People had died. People would keep on dying. They would remain at sea until someone came up with a plan. There was nothing at all she could say, do or think of that would make anything better anymore.
Her train of thought brought tears to her eyes. Tears of pure frustration as she excused herself from the table. Pushing her chair back, she moved out of the room quickly before letting a few stray tears fall. Instead of going straight to her room, she went the in the opposite direction, heading for the Captains room. Andrea didn't know what she needed to hear, or if she needed to hear anything, or if she just wanted someone to listen, but she kept on walking.
Mike, much like her, probably had no clue on what to do now. What to say, what to think, but if she could get him to admit that, she wouldn't feel so bad about it all.
Arriving outside of Mike's room, she wondered if now would be the right time. She caught a glimpse of him whilst she was sat in the mess hall, but he was gone within a minute or two. Knocking on the door she held her breath until she heard him call her in.
Opening the door Andrea stepped into the room without looking up from the floor. Closing the door behind her she quietly moved to stand in front of the captain's desk.
"XO, what can I do for you?" Mike asked, only looking up from his paperwork briefly. Andrea was silence for a minute. What could he do for her? Why was she even here?
"Andrea?" It sounded so odd to hear her name spoken from his mouth.
"I, I'm sorry, sir. I don't know what I was expecting." Mike gave her a small smile before standing up, gesturing to the general direction of the couch.
"Sit down, I'll grab you some coffee." Andrea waited a moment, she didn't know what for. Maybe it was permission?
When she finally sat down, she was still at a loss. She had no explanation as to why she was even in Mike's room, but she was, and she would just have to go along with whatever her brain gave her to say.
Andrea gave a small, yet forced smile when Mike handed her a cup of coffee.
"Thank you, sir." Mike shook his head.
"I think you've earnt the right to call me Mike," Although Mike liked the authority, there was a time and a place, and this was personal. Plus, he and Andrea had been held hostage together, so he felt as though he could say he'd seen her at her worst.
"I saw you in the mess hall, I just wanted to see how you were holding up…" Andrea struggled with her words. She wanted so badly to put on her work persona, but it was too much effort.
"I didn't know what to say. Tom was always so good at boosting everyone's spirits, he was always so good with speeches, I guess I don't have that in me." Mike said with a light chuckle.
"I just feel as though I want to wake up," Andrea admitted.
Mike rarely saw her like this, there had been moments between them when Andrea had found out about her husband and daughter, a few moments when Mike saw her as the loving wife and mother, but it was rare and the moment was over within minutes and her hardened work persona was put back on before he could ask if she was okay.
"That's nothing to be ashamed about. I think we all want this to be over. I keep thinking that one day I'll wake up and we'll be on our way back from the Arctic, heading home." Mike felt his throat go tight as he tried to explain.
As much as he wanted to open up and vent, he knew Andrea had come to him for some kind of support, what use would he be if he started to break down now?
After a moment, Mike reached out to take Andrea's hand, which they both knew was out of character, so much so, that it caused Andrea to look at him with confusion, but Mike ignored it.
"We're all going to need time to heal."
"I know."
"I just want you to know I'll be there for you, Andrea." Mike gave her hand a small squeeze.
Andrea didn't know what she needed to hear, but Mike's words would help her sleep a little better later.
Thank you so much for reading, please let me know what you think! Bethany.