Authors Note: I'm reposting this; it appears that I'm having a little
issue with FFN. Every time I have posted a new story I can't find it on
the front pages. I've looked and looked. I'm not sure this is being
posted correctly so here goes the second try. Thank you for your patience
and I hope that those that have read this thus far will continue to do so.
Thanks again!
Prologue
Time, it whispers along as intangible as the wind, running through our hands as elusive as water. We can never have enough of it, yet we often wish it would pass quickly. Often we have wished to turn time back, whether to fix a mistake we have made or to simply live in a time we think we would belong better in.
Yes I speak of time travel, something that has been disputed, romanticized, and written about for longer than any of us can pinpoint. For most it is an actual impossibility, for some of us time whispers in our ear. For some of us we can feel it passing, rushing along like the water in a river. What if that flow could be capped or contained like water in a bottle? I'm not claiming the power, only that I experienced the results. There are things in this world far more powerful than the mere mortal. I have no doubts of that.
For longer than I can remember I felt out of place, I did not belong in the time I lived in and like most I sought out the art of acting and re- enactment. I attempted to learn the mannerisms, the speech, the costuming of a time long forgotten. Call it what you will, old souls, reincarnation. I believe in reality we are just misplaced, destined to live in a time that we are not born to. I tried to live as I could, my very soul cried for something more, something I could never satisfy it with. Though I made a very valiant attempt, to soothe my longing and bury it the only way I though possible.
I attempted to relive it in the only way I knew how, much to the confusion and chagrin of my family. I even learned to sword fight though I knew that no lady of "my time" as I called it would have learned such a sport. Or at least very few women in recorded history had ever learned to a point of historical recognition.
The one thing I never counted on was fate, the unseen hand that is more than often disputed or discounted. It is an unseen hand and whether we wish to admit to a certain control that is not our own in our lives it exists. There are somethings that can not be coincidence. I prefer to believe it is God, for it is much more comforting to believe that something much wiser than yourself is the one guiding you, that through the trials you face in the end it will be alright.
I am thankful for the chance I was given for while I left behind a man I loved. I found a love that is beyond what I could have ever imagined. I found that love can be fickle especially in the confines of the twentieth century, but that when constant it is a force to be reckoned with. I learned that you can fight it, but in the end it will claim you or leave you a ruined shell of a person. My grandmother loved like that, but in the twentieth century it is a dying emotion. I fought it, I tried to remember that I had only to get back, but in the end it was not what was planned for me. They say God never gives us more than we can handle and it is true, it's just that we may not want to handle what he gives us. At times it tries us beyond what we wish to live through. In the end though the rewards are great.
Remember that there are rewards for sometimes that is all that will get you through. Read my story, learn from it, or take it as from a babbling idiot, but for those of you that understand my longings. Take my story to heart, learn for you may find as I have and others before me have that your time is coming.
- Lillia Jameson
Prologue
Time, it whispers along as intangible as the wind, running through our hands as elusive as water. We can never have enough of it, yet we often wish it would pass quickly. Often we have wished to turn time back, whether to fix a mistake we have made or to simply live in a time we think we would belong better in.
Yes I speak of time travel, something that has been disputed, romanticized, and written about for longer than any of us can pinpoint. For most it is an actual impossibility, for some of us time whispers in our ear. For some of us we can feel it passing, rushing along like the water in a river. What if that flow could be capped or contained like water in a bottle? I'm not claiming the power, only that I experienced the results. There are things in this world far more powerful than the mere mortal. I have no doubts of that.
For longer than I can remember I felt out of place, I did not belong in the time I lived in and like most I sought out the art of acting and re- enactment. I attempted to learn the mannerisms, the speech, the costuming of a time long forgotten. Call it what you will, old souls, reincarnation. I believe in reality we are just misplaced, destined to live in a time that we are not born to. I tried to live as I could, my very soul cried for something more, something I could never satisfy it with. Though I made a very valiant attempt, to soothe my longing and bury it the only way I though possible.
I attempted to relive it in the only way I knew how, much to the confusion and chagrin of my family. I even learned to sword fight though I knew that no lady of "my time" as I called it would have learned such a sport. Or at least very few women in recorded history had ever learned to a point of historical recognition.
The one thing I never counted on was fate, the unseen hand that is more than often disputed or discounted. It is an unseen hand and whether we wish to admit to a certain control that is not our own in our lives it exists. There are somethings that can not be coincidence. I prefer to believe it is God, for it is much more comforting to believe that something much wiser than yourself is the one guiding you, that through the trials you face in the end it will be alright.
I am thankful for the chance I was given for while I left behind a man I loved. I found a love that is beyond what I could have ever imagined. I found that love can be fickle especially in the confines of the twentieth century, but that when constant it is a force to be reckoned with. I learned that you can fight it, but in the end it will claim you or leave you a ruined shell of a person. My grandmother loved like that, but in the twentieth century it is a dying emotion. I fought it, I tried to remember that I had only to get back, but in the end it was not what was planned for me. They say God never gives us more than we can handle and it is true, it's just that we may not want to handle what he gives us. At times it tries us beyond what we wish to live through. In the end though the rewards are great.
Remember that there are rewards for sometimes that is all that will get you through. Read my story, learn from it, or take it as from a babbling idiot, but for those of you that understand my longings. Take my story to heart, learn for you may find as I have and others before me have that your time is coming.
- Lillia Jameson