My Best Friend's Girl

Prelude

Adam's POV

This can't be happening. I thought I loved her. The first person I loved in a long time. The last person I loved, said she loved me, but when she found out who I really was, what I really am, she outed me. Larissa Jacobs. She broke my heart, and was the reason I had to leave my old school. I promised myself, never again, but I'm just that much of a dumbass.

Fiona Coyne. First of all, I was stupid enough to think she would go for a tenner, she's a freaking senior! Rich, gorgeous, high class, and would have nothing to do with a dorky fifteen year old like me. And to make matters worth, I thought she was the only girl who accepted me for who I really was! She didn't see me as a girl, she didn't see me as Gracie, she saw me for who I really am. Adam. A boy. And she told me she loved me. I loved her. But I was wrong. She didn't see me for a boy. You know, I wouldn't have been so heart broken if she had realized she was a lesbian in the first place, no I wouldn't have cared, that happens in relationships all the time. You realize you're not happy, try to figure out why and then it dawns on you, "Oh shit, I know why I don't like you. You're not a girl!" Like, that I would've been okay with. But she saw me as a way to not have to accept who she really was. She thought she could have the best of both worlds, a guy in the mind, but the sexual pleasure of a girl. She didn't see me as Adam she saw me as a way out! And that broke my heart more than I thought possible.

So now, here I am, leaving her condo, crying out of realization. I don't know where I was walking to, but I didn't give a damn. I can't believe I was that blind! How did I not see what was right in front of me. She'd tried to take my clothes off before, but I thought she was just drunk. Today she actually said the words. I, I can't do this anymore!

I screamed, screamed at the top of my lungs, running. Running away. Why? Does someone really hate me up there? Why couldn't I have just been born in the right body? Why does my own mother look at me in disgust. Why am I tortured in the hell hole they call a school? Why? Why! Why can't for once, I be happy? Why can't ADAM-FUCKING-TORRES be happy? Is it that impossible? I want some God damn answers!

Because you're not suppose to be Adam, you're suppose to be Gracie, says my stupid inner voice.

"I am not Gracie! Gracie's dead! Gone. Never coming back!"

Face it, Gracie, if you accepted who you really are, you'd be happy.

"I was never happy when I was Gracie, and I have the scars to prove it!" I yelled to the voices in my head, still pounding my legs as fast as they would go, feeling as if my bindings might brake, my heart was beating so hard.

Make everyone else happy, your mom, the kids at school, everything would be so much better, Gracie.

"Stop calling me that! My name's not Gracie!"

"Adam?" Someone called out.

"I am not Gracie!" I collapsed.

"Oh, Adam!" Whoever it was, stood me up and dragged me to a bench, laying my head on their chest.

"Adam, what happened?" I sniffled and sat up to see the cool blue eyes of my best friend, Clare Edwards.

"Why can't for once, just once! I be happy? Why? Is it that impossible! Why can't for once, Adam Torres be happy?"

"Adam, what're you talking about?" She asked overly concerned, almost maternally.

"I was at Fiona's, and things were…intense. She started lifting up my shirt. I stopped her and asked why she would do it, she knows the truth about me. She said something about 'best of both worlds'. She doesn't see me as a guy, she sees me as an escape. She used me for my body because she couldn't accept she wants a girl. She used me!" I started crying again and Clare pulled me in for a hug.

"She doesn't deserve you Adam. One day, you'll find someone, who accepts you for you. Sees you're not a girl. You are Adam, not Gracie. You deserve to be happy. Never forget that, alright Adam?"

"Thank you, so much, Clare. I don't know what I'd ever do without you." I said in all honesty.

I lied to myself before. Fiona wasn't the only girl that accepted me for me. Clare was. She found me that one day, I came in dressed as Gracie, burning myself by the picnic tables. She said to me, you don't have to change who you are, Adam. Everyone else does. She helped me that day, and here she is, doing it again. Clare Edwards was the kindest, gentlest, most beautiful person I've ever met. She actually does care. She doesn't treat me like a girl, or a pity case, and she sees past the physical bases. She sees Adam. I think I'm falling for this girl.

"Don't worry about it, Adam. You're my best friend, and Eli and I will always be there for you."

And then it hit me. And if I kept this up, it literally would. Eli. As in my best friend. As in Clare's boyfriend. As in the Clare I was falling for. Oh my God.

I'm falling for my best friend's girl!

I've got three words.

Fuck.

My.

Life.

So...what did you think?

I know, it was really short, but it was an idea that just popped in my head.

I really hope you like it.

And keep in mind, I'm not continuing this until I finish Indescribable, so it might be a few weeks before I uploaad again.

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Love Always,

Pho:)