Hello all, and welcome to my second Ouran fanfic! I hope this will be slightly less creepy/demented!
It is a Mori and Hunny fanfic to Cradled in Love by Poets of the Fall. Sadly, I own neither Ouran High
School Host Club nor Poets of the Fall. I hope all of you enjoy my sappy love story! Oh, one last thing!
I know Hunny doesn't have blue eyes, but I had to alter it a little so the song would work, so please
pretend for me. Enjoy!
The way you looked at me with those big eyes of yours, what was I supposed to do? We had known each other since we were small children, but every time I looked at you, I felt as though my heart would pound out of my chest. Your eyes, those beautiful sparkling gems, they haunt me in the most pleasantly peculiar way.
When we were young, before I was assigned to protect you, I was always alone. I was quiet even then. Satoshi-san was far too much younger than me for us to associate on a regular basis. That, combined with the drastically different personalities made it nigh on impossible for us to be friends. Don't get me wrong, I love my brother and would do anything for him. Maybe that is why I cared for you so much, Mitsukuni. You were just like him; always happy and eager to help anyone who needs it. Both of you were always quick to apologize for your misdeeds and never stayed angry at anyone for long.
No, I do not think that your similarities to my younger brother had anything to do with how I felt- feel- for you. You have captured my heart and soul in a way that nor he nor anyone else ever could. Your presence took me out of my head and left me feeling deliriously happy. Not that anyone would ever notice by looking at me, but I know you saw it; you saw the way I behaved when we are alone versus when we were with the others. No matter what, they must never know... Not even now, when you are gone and I am alone.
You had the blue not sapphire eyes,
To back up all those gazes;
To pierce my guard and take my soul off to faraway places.
Told me I'll never be alone,
Cause you're right there.
I know you did not understand what I meant the first time I told you that I loved you. You smiled and told me you loved me too, then asked if I needed a nap. I told you no. You looked confused. We were alone so I explained in the only way I knew how. I leaned in and kissed you softly on the cheek. I had sworn to myself that I would do nothing more than admit my feelings to you. I did not wish to scare you with a kiss on the lips. Not until I knew how you would react.
My fear was unfounded however; all you did was smile and press your soft lips to mine. You told me that you loved me too.
We both knew that no one could ever find out, or we would be ostracized by our families and scorned by our friends. Around anyone else, we were the same as always. Alone though, and I was an entirely different person. I would speak and laugh freely and without fear. Not much else changed between us, except I could speak to you knowing I had one less secret to hide from you. Only those close to us even noticed the slight change in my attitude, my smiles coming easier, and being quicker than ever to protect you. Only Kyoya-chan noticed anything at all really; the other boys were too dense and Haruhi-chan hadn't known either of us long enough to know I had changed at all.
Being with you saved me from so much more than I ever told you Mitsukuni. No one knows how abusive my father can be. Not even Kyoya-chan is privy to that particular bit of information. My father tells everyone that he wants to practice Kendo with me, when all he really does is use it as an excuse to beat me. I know that I could not defeat him even if I tried, so I had stopped trying. Until I found out you love me the way I love you. Now I have someone else to fight for. I know that you know what Kendo bruises look like, and you know that mine are far too severe to be from any form of martial arts. I never told you where I really got them, and now I don't need to. My bruises have faded and healed, never to return. Because of your love, I have picked myself up off the ground and dusted myself off. Now I fight back against my father, and he has bruises to match mine. Normal Kendo bruises, not the marks of abuse.
I don't know what our love had done for you, but I prayed that I could have been your stars at the very least, the same way you were my sun.
We took a gamble with this love,
Like sailing to the storm
With the waves rushing over to take us,
We were battling against the tide.
You were my beacon of salvation.
I was your starlight.
When the accident happened, you shielded me, even though it was my duty to protect you. You threw your tiny body at me, knocked me out of the way and knocking you senseless. The chandelier shattered to the floor, crushing you and shredding your flawless skin. I yelled your name until my voice broke and I could taste blood in my mouth. I dug through the glass, ripping the skin off of my hands, but I didn't care. I just needed to get to you. When I did, the others could barely tell it was you. I knew though. I would always recognize your beautiful face, no matter what happened to it.
You said my name, even though you could hardly keep your eyes open. You told me not to cry for you, but to cry happy tears for all of the good times we had together. You asked me to never forget you, no matter what. I swore I wouldn't, and I swore I would never love another. You tried to shake your head, but it was too painful. You told me not to forget you, but also to not stop living my life. You told me not to ignore those who were right in front of me in favor of mourning you. I told you that I wouldn't have to mourn you because you were going to live.
You smiled sadly at me through the pain and made your last request of me. You asked for one last kiss before you left. At that moment, I would've sold my soul to you if you had asked; I would have traded places with you in an instant. All you had to do was ask. I fought back my tears and pressed my lips against yours. The salty taste of your lifeblood filled my mouth, and at that moment, I didn't care that the rest of the Host Club was there and had seen me kiss you. All that mattered was fulfilling your wishes. You smiled when I pulled away and told me that you wanted to take a nap. I nodded, not able to trust my voice. I watched helplessly as you closed your eyes, a smile still on your face. I cradled your tiny body in my arms until the very end.
By the time the paramedics arrived, you were gone and my life was over.
So don't cry for your love,
Cry tears of joy,
'Cause you're alive; cradled in love.
Don't cry for your love,
Cry tears of joy,
'Cause you're alive; cradled in love.
I refuse to let go of the love we had, I doubt I ever will. I keep it with me in my- our- memories. You asked me to not forget you, and I never will. I doubt I could even if I wanted to. That was an easy promise to keep. To not cry for you, however... That vow was broken before the light had even left your eyes. The only thing I have left to fulfill is to keep living my life. I will find love eventually, I suppose.
I know the love we shared was insignificant in the grand scheme of things, but to me, it was so much more. I can't help but be greedy and wish we'd had more time together. When I am alone, I can still hear you asking me what's wrong or if I would like some cake. I wish I had told you yes more often. I know you won't ever really leave me as long as I remember you, but it isn't the same. I want to be able to see you, hold you, kiss you, feel you on my shoulders. Is that too much to ask for? I just want to be able to see you, even though I know you are still right there.
I kept the love you gave me alive,
And now I carry it with me.
I know it's just another tear-drop from Mother Earth,
But in it I can hear a dolphin sing
Telling me I'll never be alone.
I know you're right there.
With the flame of my love still burning brilliantly, I march up to your final resting spot. I kneel in front of you and bow my bead. I cannot look at the picture of you that sits there. You were holding Usa-chan and had your typical grin on your face. I wish I could look at you, but every time I do, the knife in my heart twists a little more. Seeing a picture of you is not enough, I want you. I want you, not your picture. I don't want your things, I want you. I did keep Usa-chan though, after Yasuchika offered him too me. I think he knew about us, even though we tried so hard to hide it. I'll never ask him though, it doesn't matter anymore. You're gone and nothing can bring you back.
I was there when they cremated you. I watched as they burned you. It took all I had not to scream at them to stop and to grab you out of there and run away. Watching them destroy you was the hardest thing I will ever do. The last light of Mitsukuni Haninozuka was horrible hypnotizing. I think I must've gone mad, because I saw my future in those accursed flames. I saw myself with my arm around a woman that I know you loved dearly. I had one child in my other arm, and her belly was swollen with a second child.
Is that what you want Mitsukuni? Is this what you meant when you told me to not ignore those who were right in front to of me? Were you talking about Haruhi-chan?
So with the fire still burning bright,
I wanna gaze into your light.
If I could see my fortune there,
You know how flames can hypnotize.
I still cannot speak you name, not aloud, not in front of anyone, not at all. The club was kind enough to not ask about our last moment, or to mention it to anyone. I think they all know though, even if they don't say it. Whenever they talk about you, they notice how my eyes will light up for a moment, only to go back to being dull and blank once I realize that you are not there. The notice how, even though I will speak of you, I will not say your name. I am afraid it will sound the same as it did when we made love. I don't know if I could handle that. I do my best for you Mitsukuni, but I don't know if I will ever be able to move on.
Do I even dare to speak out your name for fear
It sounds like, like a lover.
It has been almost seven years since that day, but the memory of you beneath all of that glass is still as vivid as it was the day it happened. I have finally fulfilled your last wish. Haruhi is now expecting our first child. We agreed that if it is a boy, we will name him after you.
I still think about you every day, and I still wish you were here, but I have learned to live without you. It is hard, but Haruhi does make me happy. She understands why I still cry for you sometimes, and she doesn't criticize me like so many others would. I told her everything about the two of us, and never once did she look disgusted or repulsed. She took it all in stride and held me while I cried. I had never cried in front of anyone until then. We weren't together yet, but it didn't seem to matter to her. It wasn't until almost two years after that that we began dating, and three years after we got together that I asked her to marry me. We have been married for a year and a half now, and she is due to give birth in about two months. Pregnancy suits her well, she almost seems like she is glowing.
I hope you approve of Haruhi and I. She said you would, but I still have to wonder sometimes.
So don't cry for your love, cry tears of joy,
'Cause you're alive; cradled in love.
Don't cry for your love, cry tears of joy,
'Cause you're alive; cradled in love.
Don't cry for your love, cry tears of joy,
'Cause you're alive; cradled in love.
Don't cry for your love, cry tears of joy,
'Cause you're alive; cradled in love.
Are you happy where you are Mitsukuni? Is it nice there? I hope they have enough cake for you there. I am so sorry that you had to die that day, it should have been me. I hope you can forgive me for not realizing what was happening. If I had been more vigilant, none of this would have happened. Even if you cannot forgive me, I will still love you forever.
Cradled in love.
Cradled in love.
Cradled in love.
Cradled in love.
Cradled in love.
I am finally ready to let go of you. I have spent long enough mourning, considering I will see you again when it is my time. I need to focus on Haruhi and the child that we will soon be raising. Goodbye Mitsukuni. I love you.
Haruhi glanced over at her sleeping husband. He had a small smile on his face, letting her know that he was dreaming of Mitsukuni. She knew her husband missed the small boy more than anything. She also knew that he was finally letting go of him.
Glancing over at the crib their baby boy would be sleeping in once he was born, Haruhi saw Usa-chan nestled safely in with the blankets. Smiling slightly, she leaned over and kissed her husband on the temple before turning off the lamp and closing her eyes for the first night of peaceful sleep she'd had in a long time.
Well I hope no one hates me for killing off Hunny! I didn't plan to when I first came up with this idea, but the story kind of took on a life of its own. I have a loose idea for a possible continuation of this, so if anyone is interested, let me know and I will get started on it ASAP! Review please!
