Each day begins the same, staring out at the endless expanse of green, forest, meadow, and adventure, not giving it a second thought. It was not always that way. When I was younger, I used to run and play and nothing would weigh me down, but that all changed when she appeared. A horrible monstrosity of bitter thoughts and dark ambitions to seal me away forever.
A vacant look dominates my face as I sit, looking out at the colorless sea of grey before me. Locked within this tower, I cannot see the world for what it really is, I only see gloom and despair—just the way she wants me to see it.
It happened quickly, so quickly that I just nearly missed it. Since it was new, my eyes shot directly to it: a splash of dull color. What could that possibly be? The corners of my mouth twitch ever so slightly, for a second allowing a hint of hope to flicker faintly within the stillness of my heart.
It was cut short, however, with the shrill of her voice, "Rapunzel! What are you doing there, you stupid boy? More dreams of being something you're not?" She chuckled as she glided over to my chair and draped an arm across my shoulders. "Don't you realize how silly it is? You were born a specific way and no one can change that. No one out there understands you." Slithering her way to face me, gazing into my vacant eyes, she mewed, "I'm not the only who understands what you are. If anyone else finds out, they will reject you and hate you. At least here, you're safe."
I gripped my hands into tight fists, as I dully gazed back at her, but then relaxed. "Yes, you're right. I'm hopeless and only have this place. No one understands me. No one can understand."
Nodding, she stood, towering over me. "That's right. I know what's best for you. Here, you're content. You don't have to suffer, cry, or be alone. You don't have to feel anything at all."
Again, it was faint, but definitely there. I saw a sudden surge of color just on the edge of what appeared to be a forest. It was brief, only for a split second, before the it was absorbed by the murky world that surrounded the tower. Curiously, I tilt my head and a single strand of radiant blonde hair shone in my dark, short hair.
As if sensing danger, the shadowy woman grew rigid and then hissed as she caressed my shoulder, "That's enough of the window for today! Let's go read a book or something, shall we?" The single long, blonde strand of hair shrank away at her touch.
Obediently, I stood and allowed her to lead me into the windowless study. The woman shot a cautious look back to the window, but saw nothing but the usual cool grey outside. Satisfied, she followed after me.
Books were a common escape for me. It allowed me to escape this world and pretend that I was in another one. I especially liked books about princesses and when I was younger. I used to pretend that I was one—before I was locked away in this place. They were just fun stories then, but now they symbolized something far greater. Fantasy was all I had left. It was the one place where she could not penetrate, at least that was I liked to believe. The truth was that she was present all the time, making sure that I do not put one toe out of line—but why?
Caught off guard by the question, I snapped back to reality with a jolt—shocking the dark woman standing idly nearby. There was a sudden pulse that wracked the tower, as my eyes suddenly filled with rage, burning through my body. A few strands of long, blonde emerging within my short mane as I yell, "Why? Why do I have to hide?"
Surprised by the outburst, this was something that she had never experienced with me before. Recovering quickly, she reached out with an icy hand and clenched my shoulder, the gold within my hair began to fade instantly, as well as the fire in my eyes. She gave a smile and said, "You know why, dear. They will not understand. You're different than they are and you will always be different. Just look at you."
Gesturing to me in a mirror, I looked to see a young man with short brown hair and dark eyes staring back at me. He was dressed in typical casual wear: a long, pink tunic—it resembled a short dress—a red belt with a silver buckle, and a white undershirt. Granted, the colors were a bit unorthodox. Turning away, I gritted my teeth and closed my eyes tightly. This was all wrong. I knew it was. That was not me—it couldn't be!
Once again, raged was fueled within me and I begun to punch at scratch at my eyes, angry with my body. Why was I born this way? It wasn't fair! Why couldn't I have been born an ordinary girl—or at least an ordinary boy? I looked down at my pink forearms that very well may bruise later as I felt hot liquid staining my cheeks with desperation.
Crumpling to the floor, I gasped, "Make it stop… Please… Make it stop. I can't handle it."
The wicked woman gave a triumphant smirk and said, "Oh, but I thought you knew better than me. I thought you wanted to know why."
I weakly reached up toward her. "No, I was wrong. You're right. It's better to feel nothing than this pain."
She snaked her way around me, cradling my form in her arms, filling me with hollow kisses. "As long as you understand. That was only a taste of your frustration and anguish. If you feel that way about yourself, think about how others feel about you. It's better just to ignore everything and live here. You can't get hurt, by others or yourself."
A faint hazel color in my eyes faded into a sullen brown, as I felt the feeling wash away, leaving an empty but content husk behind. Blinking, I sat up, as if confused as how I got where I was and then stood to go back to my reading.
The dark lady cast another look to the window, where she stole a glimmer of shimmering color. Glowering, she mumbled to herself, "Something is coming. Whatever it is, it's making him stronger. I don't like this."
She did not make an effort to hide what she was saying to me. I was too dumb with numbness to really care; however, every time she referred to me that way, I felt a distinct pang of pain, frustration, and anger. Even like this, I hated being referred to that way. The wicked lady knew that, of course, but she said things like that to spite me. She knew I needed her. Did I? Of course, I could not survive without her. The world would not except me for who I really am, I need her to hide myself from the world. It was complicated. I hated her, despised her, but she still gave me everything I needed to have a stable life.
Later that night, I was once again wide awake. It was at this time that she seemed to be at her weakest and that was why I found it difficult to sleep. I slid out of bed and crept past her bedroom to the large window. My eyes widened as they met with the rich, velvety dark sky, twinkling stars shining with a full, bright moon. The shades of grey had been replaced with a rich world of somewhat dull color, accented with the beauty of a lush forest that faced the tower.
I crossed my arms on the windowsill and leaned forward, smiling as I took in the beauty—even if it was dulled down. I closed my eyes and breathed in the fragrance of the summer night air. It was refreshing, she normally did not really smell anything at all, or felt or heard anything for that matter. She does not experience anything while around her. It was a blessing and a curse.
Lost in my thoughts, I thought I had imagined a sound. I wanted to hear something, anything. Even if it was just the gentle chirping of a cricket. Strangely, however, the forest was silent tonight. It was if something foreign was creeping within these hallowed woods.
There it was again! I was certain this time that I heard the snap of something stepping on a twig. I scanned the edge of the forest; squinting, trying to force my eyes to adjust to the darkness outside the tower. A dark figure appeared from the brush and gazed up toward her—or, at least, it appeared to. What was that? It looked like…a man? I felt a strange twinge in my heart and a tickle shoot down my spine, my mane suddenly beginning to grow into rich, blonde that reached down to the floor that I was sitting on.
Just as soon as all of this came to be, it was suddenly swallowed by a mist of cool grey. For a moment, I looked around in confusion, but all of that is erased as a voice scolded from behind me, "Rapuzel! What have I told you about wandering out of bed at night? Go to sleep!"
Forgetting about the apparition outside the tower, I nodded to the woman and headed back to my bed. Without my knowing, a single blonde lock remained, brushing against my cheek, as I closed my eyes.