Ehem. Let me introduce myself. I am a girl. Much like many I have my own goals and decisions. I am a new teen and as ready and raring to go as any other. But there are some things along the way that won't be fun... or pretty.

So, first off. I am nice and sweet. I can tend to lose my temper and get REALLY mad. But since I don't do much about anything, cause I don't want to hurt anyone... I am an easy target for bullying and teasing. (Don't you DARE exit out! It isn't about bullying! There is stuff that relates but it's in a different way.) So I am easy to bother. Also what doesn't help the situation is that I am blonde. I shall say this once, I AM NOT STUPID! And blonde jokes can be plain defensive when it's pointed at you. I have very, very blue eyes.

So as conclusion I am the most seemingly weak person ever. But that doesn't mean I'm not afraid to write what I really do feel.

Since I'm a girl, I say things like, 'I'm fine, I'm okay, nothing happened, today was great, I love it...' And so on. Just so people won't worry about me I put on a fake act. A mask, that covers my real face and actual personality. And in this book... I'm about to let it all out at once.

Oh and when girls say their okay, 70%-90% of the time they are not. So I would look into that.

Since this is the prologue I'll tell you a little about me. My life in general. I have gone to the same school since first grade. I am christian. (And no, I won't go all Jesus on any of you.) Parents waaaaaay too over protective and an annoying little brother. Seems normal right? WRONG.

First, and I'll tell you more about this later, the friends I made and first grade and I thought BFF? Well, *pfft* believe me. That, 'forever' part didn't last even close. Second, Christian. I have as much hard time as any other person. God does help. But not every single time. In my life I think god is seriously trying to KILL me or something. I swear... but anyway. Talk about that later. Third off, parents. Not normal protective, way protective. I am almost in high school and if they find out I hang with boys (and girls) my father will freak. He will literally lock me in the house for the rest of my life. Or until I turn 18. No joke. They aren't even close to normal, trust me. Fourth, uh... okay. I give up on this one. Normal annoying little brother.

PHEW! Got that covered.

So, this right here. Will be a story of MY life and mine only for the past 13 years. A lot can happen in that time. Don't think it can't.

After I explain baby-hood, childhood and tween ages, you might be surprised. Also, from then on it will be a journal. Only on really odd days though.

AND! (I luv caps) If I do anything to your unliking, just tell me. I love to talk about things.

I shall go on.

I don't remember much of when I was a toddler I do remember that I was always getting into trouble. But when I was 2 I will never forget what happened.

We had visited one of Florida's beaches. My brother was not alive yet so it was just, me, mom and dad.

My mother was near the middle of the beach, my dad building a 'sand alligator' that actually turned out really well! But they weren't paying attention to me and I got in the water.

I walked in the cool liquid. I remember fish and shells, occasionally I'd see a crab scurry away in the water. I had fun, chasing things... then I went out deeper.

(Note that I was two. So I CAN'T SWIM WHATSOEVER!)

I was too distracted to see what came next, a huge wave (or what seemed huge at the time... I was like 2 feet tall. I have no idea if it was even that big.) came closer and toppled over me, sending me deep into the water. (Again, I am small, don't know how to hold breath yet!) I remember gasping for air, screaming, "DADDY! DADDY!" I steadied myself, but couldn't hold my balance as another washed me away. By this time, my dad actually noticed I was about to DIE. So before another wave came over me I saw a glimpse of my dad. In running position.

(Pause, so you know when something bad happens everything is in slow motion? That's what's happening in my mind at the moment.)

I think I might have blacked out or something... because I don't remember much after going under again.

Apparently I was saved by my dad.

(Numbero uno, God, WHY YOU TRY KILL ME! ? Two, this was the exact start of the 'over protectiveness')

They kept a close eye on me after that. But... not close enough.

About 6 months later we moved to the city I'm in now. Right before my 3rd birthday.

I was out in the front yard, not completely used to the new place we lived in, when I 'accidentally' threw my ball into the street.

My mom and dad were in the backyard.

(Note- oh yes, they kept a 'close' eye on me.)

I ran out into the street to get the ball. Right as a car screeched by.

I swear it almost hit me. The lady came to a abrupt stop and got out to see if I was okay.

Pfft, what were you thinking lady? OF COURSE I'M OKAY! You never even hit me!

(Wow there... God, do you want me to die? And again adds to the over protectiveness. NOT. FUN.)

Mother and father were very grateful to this lady, that I find out later is our next door neighbor. Imagine that.

And that is just the beginning of my toddler-hood. Beware people. I get mischievous.