Ok people, Meme12 here. I know the first thing you're gonna say is 'Update Sacrifices are worth it for you damn authoress!' but this idea had be running around like a hamster on a wheel and I had to get it out somehow but rest assured; updating of the stories are underway but it will be slow as it has always been since reality interfered aka school. So for now, please enjoy this other tale spun by my mind.

Picking up the pieces

Shiro/Hichigo has been neglected and abused by Ichigo and Renji for ten whole years after Seireitei blames Shiro for a crime that he hadn't commit. Despite the abuse; Shiro still loves Ichigo and silently bears it despite Zangetsu telling him to run away. When the truth of the unfair trial comes to light; Ichigo finds that Hichigo has become extremely skittish, scared, physically wounded & emotionally exhausted towards him and Renji. Can he help pick up the pieces and put Shiro back together again? Or will Shiro be too frightened to try and love once more?

Pairings: Renji x Ichigo, eventual Renji x Ichigo x Shiro

Gonna be slight AU because it is after the Thousand blood war.

Warnings: Yaoi, mentions of abuse; OOC warning.

Disclaimer: I don't own Bleach or any of the characters. Well, do own the OCs Ren & Koya.

Picking up the pieces chapter 1: To live without love

It was early in the morning when soft footsteps pattered quickly and stopped in front of a room. A small, bony arm pushes the sliding door aside and the individual steps in to check on the small beings in the room. Dulled gold eyes softened tenderly at the sight of the orange head 8 year old with one leg sprawled over his younger five year old red head brother who had shifted in a way that his fist had landed on his snoring elder brother's face. The individual smiles wryly and quietly head inside to tuck the siblings in.

Under the dim light reflected from outside the room; it revealed an albino with long snowy white waist length hair. If one had taken a closer look, they would have realized that the albino looked very sickly with the bags under his eyes and the bruises marring his skin and the fact that the emaciated frame indicated malnutrition.

With smooth expertise; the albino gently shifted the children and tucks them in. Gently; a small, thin hand soothes the hair down and the frail individual couldn't help but feel the strong over-whelming urge to protect them. After all, they were the most important individuals of the one he loved and he will continue to love them until the end of time. The albino continued to gaze at the two sleeping children until the first rays of dawn hit the skies. Realizing that it was almost sunrise; the albino quickly sprang to action to make breakfast in order to avoid a morning beating and hopefully maybe avoid the other beatings for the rest of the day.

As the albino hurries off to make breakfast; another figure with wavy hair watches him. Blue eyes soften in pain and anguish at watching a once so strong individual being mauled to nothing more than a broken horse...

Ichigo stirs and awakes to a soft kiss on his forehead. Smiling the orange head opens his eyes to see a familiar red head smiling at him. "Morning babe…" "Hey…" The two individuals kiss softly before Renji cuddles Ichigo close, nuzzling said male's neck. "Let's sleep a little more…" "Renji we need to work today…" "Don't care…" "I care." Pouting slightly, Renji releases his hold on the orange head who heads off to the bathroom despite the red-head's protests.

Looking into the mirror, Ichigo found it hard to believe that 10 years had passed by so quickly in a flash. It was as if it was yesterday that Renji propose to him and now he was the 'mother' of 2 kids and was balancing being a Shinigami and a working parent. "Time passes by far too fast…" Ichigo murmurs to himself as he clads himself in his work clothes and heads out of the bathroom only to hear Renji shout.

Rushing out, Ichigo finds Renji shouting at an albino individual who was cowering with his arms raised in front in an attempt to ward off the worst of the blows. "Renji that's enough." Ichigo states with a sigh while the red-head looks at him. "But Ichigo…" "Enough… I don't need Koya seeing this violence." The red head 'hmph' before giving one last kick to the albino. "You were lucky Hollow." The albino didn't dare to look up as Renji stalked off. Frightened eyes slowly looked up to see Ichigo staring coldly at him. "Get cleaned up Hollow; I don't need to see your blood on the floor." With those words; Ichigo roughly brushes past the trembling albino male. Shiro felt his heart break once more and his vision blurring which was surprising to the albino male himself. He has already forgotten how many nights he had cried himself to sleep that he thought that his tears had all dried up.

Shiro slowly gets up with great difficulty as the kick Renji had deposited had probably broken a rib or two and those were the less severe injuries. Shiro slowly got up and would have probably sunk to the ground once more if gentle arms hadn't wrapped themselves around his shoulders to help him up. Dulled gold eyes met worried and saddened blue eyes. "Are you alright…?" Tensa ask softly while Shiro gave a small smile and nods causing the spirit's heart to break a little more. "Shiro, you can't stay here. You have to leave this place, Ichigo is killing you…!" The albino shakes his head and Tensa grip on his shoulder tightens. "Shiro, he's changed…ever since that trial… He won't protect you and even if you continue to serve him and Renji faithfully he will never respond to your emotions… You have to leave…!"

Shiro shakes his head slowly while Tensa chokes back a sob. "Please Shiro… I can't watch him torment you any longer… I can't watch you get hurt anymore… Please save yourself Shiro…" Hichigo eyes softened even more as Tensa begins crying against his shoulder. Tensa was Hichigo's motivation to keep going despite the abuse. Tensa's presence was a soothing balm to Shiro's living hell and the sword spirit was the one who helped him back to his room when he had taken too much beating and help to bandage up the wounds when he had been too frail to do so. Ichigo had harmed Tensa once when he had caught the male bandaging Shiro's wounds. Shiro was deathly frightened when Ichigo had slammed Tensa into the wall, strangling the spirit. The words that Ichigo had uttered were so frightening and so out of characteristic for the orange head that Shiro could only watched in horror as Tensa fought for air under the tight grip around his neck.

Eventually, Ichigo had let go and Shiro had rushed over to help Tensa only to be slammed into the wall itself by the furious orange head. The anger in his eyes still struck fear in his heart whenever he thought about it but Shiro knew he had to bear this. After all, it was his fault that Ichigo had changed so much so he shall silently bear those sins…even if it kills him in the end. Shiro smiles softly at Tensa as he gave the sword spirit's hand a soft squeeze to persuade the sword spirit that he was alright before limping off to continue his chores leaving Tensa to clench his fist tightly in anger and helplessness as he could only watch Shiro live in a hellish nightmare.

While Tensa blames himself; Ichigo was having breakfast with his family. It was only during these moments that Ichigo cherished since he could see his kids and Renji during their busy schedule. "Eat your vegetables Koya." "Must I mom?" "Listen to your mother Koya…" Renji started and the 8 year old pouted. "Why must I get so much of vegetables? Ren has less!" The red-head five year old sticks out his tongue at his older brother resulting in Koya scowling at him. "You will have to finish your vegetables as well young man." The five year old went slacked jaw while his older brother sniggered. "Enough you two, or do you want to spend quality time with Grandpa Isshin?" "No thank you!" Both kids exclaimed while Renji chuckle. "What's wrong, your grandfather loves you two a lot…" "He gives too much love dad. It's freaky!" Koya states as he munch on his food while both parents shook their heads in exasperation.

It was at this moment that Shiro entered the room. "Shiro nii!" Ren exclaims happily as he scrambles down the chair and snuggle against the albino. Shiro smiles softly as he soothes the child's hair down as he snuggles around his legs despite the irritation hidden in their parent's eyes. Shiro politely bows to Renji and Ichigo before he picks Ren up and places him back in his chair. Koya pouts as Ren giggles at the attention he received from Shiro. He wanted Shiro's attention too. The pout however stops when Shiro smiles at him and ruffles his hair gently. Satisfied, the 8 year old resumes his fight with the vegetables while Shiro stands in a corner to await further orders.

Breakfast continued in relative peace and soon Ichigo and Renji stood up to leave. "We're going squirt." "Ok!" "I'm 8 Dad. I'm not a squirt anymore." Koya pouted while Renji ruffles his hair again and Ichigo squats down to kiss both boys on the cheek. "You both be good alright." "Eww, papa!" Ichigo chuckled at the chorusing boys before he turned to gaze at Shiro. Shiro flinched slightly at the cold stare as Ichigo approach. The orange head leaned over and whispered in Shiro's ear. "You had better look after him well, or else…" Shiro felt a strong chill as the grip on his shoulder was painfully tight and managed a nod that somewhat satisfied Ichigo who turned back to his children with a smile once more. "We're leaving." "Take care papa, daddy!" Both males shun-po off; leaving oblivious, care free children and a frightened albino.

"Shiro nii let's play!" Ren exclaimed as he tugged Shiro's kimono, snapping the male out from his frightened thoughts. Looking at the excited emotions in his eyes; Shiro felt the fear ebbed away slowly and he nods resulting in happy cheers. It was alright, for their sake, for Ichigo's sake, everything was fine just the way it is…

With Ichigo and Renji

"So I'll see you later?" "Yeah. See ya." Renji plants a small kiss to Ichigo's forehead before he left for his office at the sixth division. Yes, times had changed after 10 years. Renji moved up the ranks and became the captain of the sixth division; replacing Byakuya who decided to step down since his injuries had left more damage then expected. Ichigo on the other hand had graduated from his high school and had gained a medical degree and was currently working at Karakura General Hospital in the human world. The couple had agreed to stay in Seireitei even though Renji had insisted that it will be easier for Ichigo if they lived in the Human World. But the orange-head had just shrugged it off and said that it would be easier for Renji. The quarrel however soon dissipated when Urahara created a portal that could transport the orange head to the Human Realm without being affected by the time difference between the two realms. Hence, Ichigo could do his job and come home at the same time as Renji. Ichigo took one last glance where Renji had last stood and head off to work

With Shiro

The albino wiped away the sweat with the back of his hand and smiles at the spotless home that he had finished cleaning. The albino had mop and swept the entire household while Tensa played with Ren and Koya had his lessons (The child was home-schooled). The albino smiles and the clean home and mentally ticked off the chores in his mind. He had washed the laundry, cleaned up the place; prepared lunch for Ren and Koya so all was left was heading out to purchase the groceries for dinner… Shiro momentarily froze at the last point. He had barely survived all those years of grocery shopping; he had been grateful for the help of some of the captains who had help put off the worst but he knew he couldn't rely on them forever… Sighing quietly; Shiro went to get the money and the grocery basket. After telling Tensa and persuading him that he would be fine on his own; the hollow set off to face war…alone.

With Renji

"Erm Taicho…" "I said to call me by my name, what is it Rikichi?" "Er right… Tai-Renji is that Hollow still there in your household…?" The brush in Renji's hand froze and Rikichi immediately braced himself for the shout of his superior but the red-head just sigh and places down his brush. "Yeah, I still can't get it why Ichigo didn't let the old man kill him…maybe it's because that hollow helped him out during the war and stuff and he couldn't watch as that thing that had once help him be wiped off from the face of the earth. I feel that he is too compassionate but that's why I love him…" Renji ended with a soft smile while Rikichi nodded.

"So why the sudden question?" "Well…I just…feel that…it's already been 10 years since 'that' has happened…shouldn't…he be forgiven…?" Renji sighs. "You're still too soft Rikichi that hollow will never change. He will still be that blood-thirsty beast; he's probably faking right now and once we let our guard down…he will wipe us out…!" "Renji…" The sharp glare silenced the young fukutaicho as Renji went back to his paper work. The 'that' had occurred 10 years ago, shortly after the thousand blood Wars.

There was a wide massacre of souls in the Rukongai and the surviving inhabitants could only pinpoint it as an advanced Hollow with a humanoid form with snowy white hair and golden eyes. Everyone had immediately turned to seek out Shiro who had been successfully separated from Ichigo and moved on his free will. Shiro of course had denied doing this and had actually begged Ichigo to believe him. Eventually he was caught red-handed; covered in the blood and gore of the dead Rukongai inhabitants and looking extremely confused. He had tried to explain it himself but the evidence spoke more. Renji couldn't help but let out a cold laugh; the Hollow had given such a lame excuse; that he wasn't there in the first place and that he had been trying to get back to Ichigo's place when he had passed out and awoke here covered in blood and then being apprehended by them.

Of course; no one doubted the evidence and Yamamoto on behalf of the 46 (the 46 haven't been re-elected yet); actually gave the death penalty. But Ichigo had stood against that saying that "Death would have been too easy; he needs to suffer and repent." His suggestion? Robbing the Hollow of his reiatsu and subjecting him for the sick twelfth division captain's experimentation. The announcement had shocked all of the captains especially certain captains from the fifth, tenth, thirteen, eighth, seventh and fourth division. It was a punishment that had been too harsh and was so scary to have come out from the orange head's mouth that all had a hard time believing that this was the same Kurosaki Ichigo. Renji remembered being shocked but had stood by his lover's decision. The other captains had argued but the Soutaicho had agreed to the decision and set the punishment.

Following that; the Hollow was subjected to 5 years of experimentation and he and Ichigo were the Hollow's so-called jail keepers to prevent him from running away. Eventually when Kurotsuchi got bored of him; Ichigo treated Shiro as his servant and it has been this way until now. Of course, stripped of his reiatsu and everything; the Hollow had become quite meek and irritating in Renji's eyes. He wished that he had disposed Shiro that day when Kurotsuchi announced that he was no longer needed. Maybe then; Ichigo would be truly happy after all…

Back with Ichigo

"Kurosaki sensei, I will be sending the next patient in soon." "Thanks." The nurse giggled and blushed softly before closing the door. Ichigo sigh before standing up to stretch for a minute. Glancing out the window; he notices the blue sky and couldn't help but smile at the good weather. "The weather is great and my life is great except for that thing in my house…" Ichigo's thought darkened at the Hollow and wonders why he had spared the Hollow after doing such a crime. "God, why didn't I ask Renji to disposed of him when Kurotsuchi no longer needed him…?" An annoyed hand ran through orange hair and Ichigo sighs forlornly. The fact that he had foolishly believed that that Hollow would never hurt anyone after he had mellowed out was a mistake. He had truly believed that he wouldn't do anything like that well…being proven wrong by a blood and gore covered Hollow shattered those convictions.

Sighing, Ichigo seats down and leans back in his office chair. He wonders why he had asked the Soutaicho to spare that Hollow. The Hollow needed to be killed but when he had seen the fear in those gold orbs…somehow he just couldn't let that thing die. Ichigo sighs as he pushes the thoughts to the back of his head and seats up straight. He has a job to do and no Hollow was going to get in the way of his thoughts.

With Shiro

The albino was breathing heavily as he ran with all his might away from the sudden rain of attacks on him. With his Hollow status; most of the residents here do not want to have any contact with him and avoided him. Most ignore him while others were more verbal; driving him away from their shops. There were only a few shops that actually still allowed him to purchase food from their stores to Shiro's relief but the daily battle of Shinigamis trying to take a bite out of him in his weakened form was countless. Shiro worriedly looked around as he stepped out from one of the stores. Noticing that the coast was clear; Shiro quickly hasten his footsteps for home. He had been so close to the exit of the shopping area when he heard the words that made his hope die instantly.

"Well, well, what do we have here? A Hollow scum huh?" Shiro immediately froze at the voices and realized that he had been surrounded by a gang of low ranking Shinigamis. "You know the drill guys…Hollows should be exterminated on sight." Shiro's eyes widened in fear as the Shinigamis drew their swords and immediately Shiro fled with the whole horde of Shinigamis chasing him. "Don't let him get away boys!" The Shinigamis roared in agreement which fueled the fear in Shiro as he tried to push his battered body on. He felt a wind and then a warm feeling sliding down his cheek which he didn't need to see that it was blood; his blood which will soon stain the kimono that he was clad in.

The albino frantically weaved through the market; golden orbs praying for an exit route. He can't die now…he promised Koya and Ren that they would be having their favourites today and if he had died…who will care for them and Ichigo. As he thought about the man he love; the albino ran faster and made a sharp turn into the nearest alleyway and hid behind the boxes of trash. "Hey where did he go?" "He can't run far… Come on!" Shiro tucked himself further in and prayed hard that he wouldn't be found. Time ticked by and it was moments later that Shiro found himself opening his eyes. Hesitantly; he peeked out from his hiding spot and wonders what time it was until he realized that the sun position hinted that it was close to late afternoon. The albino quickly stood up and peeped out from the alleyway. Realizing that the danger had passed; he let out the breath that he had unknowingly been holding. The thought of his once more close brush with death lasted for only a minute when he realizes the time and Shiro immediately raced back to avoid preparing a late dinner and incurring the wrath of Ichigo and Renji.

Back at Home

Tensa was worriedly eyeing the clock; it was almost 5 and there was no Shiro in sight. The sword spirit was beginning to worry that Shiro was somewhere out there; too wounded to move or maybe…even killed. Tensa immediately shook that last thought away as he tried to think of a way to make it seem that dinner was in preparation in order to save Shiro from their wrath. "Tensa nii, is Shiro coming home soon?" "Yeah, he's probably coming back soon, any minute…" Tensa was cut off mid -sentence when he felt Ichigo and Renji's reiatsu. Fear gripped him tightly as the two showed up. "Papa, Daddy!" "Hey my little man!" Renji scooped both kids up and kiss their foreheads before handing them over to Ichigo who mimic his actions.

"Hey Tensa." "I-Ichigo…you're early today." "Where's the Hollow?" Tensa froze at the question and immediately Ichigo's eyes darken. "He's on his way back soon…" "Shiro nii went out for a long time." "Is that so?" "Yeah, he hasn't been back since morning?" Tensa felt his heart dropped to the pit of his stomach as Koya unconsciously spurted out the words that could result in another of Shiro's beatings. "Man, what is he doing out there?" Renji questioned in an annoyed tone but beneath that tone laid a more sinister thought and Tensa couldn't help but feel dread continuously build up when hurried footsteps where heard and Tensa immediately sees an exhausted Shiro running in. The albino's relieved expression was immediately replaced with fear as he saw the two males. His trembling hands dropped the groceries in fear which only he and Tensa could sense except for the two children who joyfully called out his name and race to hug him.

"Welcome back Shiro…" Ichigo stated with a smile which never reached his eyes and Shiro trembled under the gaze and nearly takes a step back when Renji steps forward. "Shiro nii, papa is gonna bring us out for dinner. Do you wanna come along?" Shiro was too frightened to answer Ren as terrified gold eyes darted nervously from Ichigo to Renji and Tensa immediately wanted to step forward to help when he was cut short by the stern glare of Ichigo. Tensa froze and immediately the glare melted into a smile. "Koya, Ren why not you wait outside with Tensa." "Why papa?" "Shiro doesn't look so good so I'm worried." The kids looked at each other before running out, tugging Tensa with them. Tensa watched in horror while he was dragged away as Ichigo closed in on Shiro.

As soon as the door closed; the smile on Ichigo's face faded and Shiro immediately stepped back. As soon as he did that; Ichigo punched him into the nearest wall. Shiro was stunned by the impact and before he could even move; a grip tightens around his neck so tightly that he couldn't breathe. "Do you remember what I told you Hollow? Never leave my kids alone… That was part of my order wasn't it!?" Shiro struggled to breathe as the grip around his neck tightened while Renji watched coldly from the side and Ichigo let loose the reins of his anger as his fingers tightens around the pale neck and as Shiro struggled to breathe; an odd sense of satisfaction washed over him as he watched the albino suffer under his grip.

Ichigo would have killed Shiro if brown orbs hadn't lock in with frighten golden orbs. Ichigo felt himself freeze slightly when he saw the pained emotion in Shiro's eyes and his grip loosen around the pale neck which caused Shiro to fall to the ground; coughing wildly as he gulped down the very much needed oxygen. The relief was cut short as Shiro felt the air being knocked out of him by a sharp kick to his gut. Eyes shutting in pain, Shiro didn't need to know that it was Renji and braced himself for the rains of attacks falling on him as the red head proceeded to beat Shiro into the ground.

"Renji that's enough… Renji!" The red head reluctantly stops in his actions and turn to face Ichigo while Shiro gasps for air and coughs out blood. "Ichigo…" "We're leaving. Koya and Ren are waiting." The red head nods and sends one more kick towards the albino who quietly whimpers in pain but was too fearful to get up in case the attacks have yet to cease. Ichigo turns to leave and stops to give Shiro his advice. "Make the wrong move again…and I will kill you personally Hollow." Shiro froze at the words as the two males left and he curls even tighter as his wounds once again begin to bleed.

Ichigo and Renji steps out and Ren and Koya tackle them happily. "Papa, is Shiro following us?" "No, Shiro isn't feeling well today so…he will be resting at home. Tensa will be looking after him." Tensa immediately froze at the words as all the worst case scenarios went through his brain as Ichigo approaches him. Leaning forward; the orange head whispers in Tensa's ear. "Clean up the trash." Blue eyes widened in shock as he shun po away with Renji who shun po off with the kids.

As soon as Ichigo and the rest had vanish; Tensa immediately ran into the kitchen and find Shiro lying on the kitchen floor bleeding and covered with bruises. Immediately Tensa knelt down and as his fingers brush against Shiro's skin; the albino immediately flinched and curled up tighter in his last defense. "Hush…Shiro it's me Tensa… It's ok Ichigo's gone." The little defensive curl loosened and Tensa gently helped the injured albino into a sitting up position and tried his best to bite back his tears. The bruises were forming and the cuts on Shiro's back and cheek had reopened resulting in the flow of crimson fluid staining the kimono Shiro was wearing and pooling to the floor.

Tensa felt the anger bubbling to the peak but reined it in tightly as he helped Shiro into the bathroom. Stripping Shiro of his clothes; the Zanpakuto spirit ran a bath and place the albino in it before running off to get some clean clothes and their friend of 10 years the first aid kit. When Tensa returned; Shiro was already drifting in and out of consciousness in the tub and Tensa rushed to prop Shiro's head up in the tub using towels. With that in place; Tensa cleaned Shiro and the wounds littering his body; the water in the tub turning a murky red due to the grime and blood that he had washed away.

Tensa dried Shiro and proceeded to bandage the wounds. Shiro had barely flinched as the iodine was wiped onto his wounds; the stinging pain was reminding Shiro in these moments that he was still alive and that there were still something known as a peaceful heaven that still existed… As Shiro come to the terms that he was still alive; Tensa had already finish bandaging his wounds and was tugging a yukata onto the albino's small frame. With that done; Tensa who was practically a head shorter then Shiro easily lifted the albino in his arms and carried Shiro back into his room.

Sliding the room door open; Tensa placed Shiro gently on the futon which was the only thing that was visible in Shiro's room. Apart from the thin futon; there was nothing left in the room apart from the four walls; no windows as well and the only ventilation was a small opening on the very top of the wall which was grilled making Shiro's dwelling very much like a jail cell. Tensa ignored the fact and focus on making Shiro more comfortable with what he had and gently brush aside some of the snowy white hair as Shiro gazed at him from frightened; exhausted half-lidded eyes.

"It's ok Shiro…Just rest for a while… No one can hurt you now…just sleep ok…?" Shiro had just gazed at him before looking up at the ceiling before covering his eyes with the back of his hand. As the tears fell, Tensa grip his free hand. "No Shiro, it isn't your fault. You didn't do anything… You didn't!" Shiro just shook his head as his body begins to tremble with his sobs. It was his fault wasn't it…? If he had ran faster and had taken note of the time better; he wouldn't have been late and Ren & Koya wouldn't have been left starving and Ichigo…Ichigo wouldn't be mad with him and Renji wouldn't beat him… He deserved it… He deserved those beatings for failing to be a good experiment subject; for not taking care of Ren and Koya properly and for everything else… Everything…

Tensa couldn't hold back his sobs as he pulled Shiro close; whispering shakily comforts that he know would never soothe the scars on Shiro's heart…

To be continued

Meme12: Yeah, it's over for now. (Waves from desk)

BANG! CRASH! MEME12!

Meme12: Oh what do I have here, a door smashing hollow who wants to kick my ass…again! Seriously, get a new hobby will you. (Does the shooing action)

Hichigo: Why am I the god damn victim again!? (Waves sword)

Meme12: It's only for this story.

Hichigo: You said the same thing for the other story!

Meme12: Oh I did… I forgot oops!

Hichigo: Damn you! Getsuga… Oof! (Pushed away)

Renji: Why am I the bad guy again! (Waves Zabimaru)

Meme12: It's only for this story Renji. (Typing on com)

Renji: But I'm always the bad guy! (Wailing)

Meme12: Deal with it and I predict an orange head to fly in just about…

Ichigo: MEME12!

Meme12: Now. (Deadpan)

Ichigo: You made me mistreat Shiro again!?

Ichigo: It's only for this story ok…? Here have a mooncake (Pushes mooncakes into their mouths)

Ichigo: You are not buying us of with… Hey, these are good…

Hichigo: Don't fall for that…Hey you're right (Chews some more)

Renji: Got anymore? (Licking fingers)

Meme12: There. (Points to fridge)

Hichigo/Renji/Ichigo: I'm first! (Runs to fridge)

Meme12: Mooncakes are the best distraction ever.

Please read and review this is meme12 saying sayonara matta o!