Indestructable

I will never be broken down. By anyone.

I made that statement on my 11th birthday. I knew i wouldn't break my vow, because i was strong. Stronger than anyone knew. My walls I built

Were high. They were indestructible.

I built these walls to save me from falling again.

I fell once, stumbled and tripped into what I thought was a pit of love. But that was only the top coating which broke, to reveal a deep hole of despair.

My father was my best friend. I wasn't exactly the 'popular' girl, so he was my only friend. I could go to him for anything. We would always talk about how successful I would be. I was going to be a doctor. My dad liked that idea a lot. When he divorced my mother, I was devastated. I joined a performing class, just to take my mind off of the bad things. I enjoyed it so much and I started to tell my father just how much it meant to me. Big mistake. I gave up on wanting to be a doctor, and started a new goal towards performing arts. My father hated the idea. He started to hit me every time I mentioned acting or singing. He heard me singing once, so he hurt me worse than ever. It ruined my life and I knew that after that, I would never trust or love anyone.

I tried to climb out, but only dug deeper.

So I gave up. Strike 1.

I hate giving up, so I said I will never fall again.

That all changed when I was 14.

I met him at a new years party. We had a few glasses of champagne, and were slightly tipsy. So everyone was dancing closely together. A guy came and started grinding against me. I laughed and played along, I don't know why, it was a stupid party. He lead me out to the garden and down to the end. He pushed me up against a tree and kissed me with so much passion. I tangled my fingers in his soft hair and he held my waist, pulling me closer as the kiss heated up. He tugged my leg up towards his waist. I took the hint and wrapped both legs around him. We finally broke for air and I realised what I had done. So I ran.

3 months later we were dating. I don't know how, but I let him in, I trusted him.

I was wrong. So wrong.

He let me down. He left me. Waiting outside a door, cold and alone. Strike 2.

I fell deeper and now I think I see the bottom, where I can fall no more.

That's why I am standing on the edge of this bridge.

Strike three. And I'm out.

Dunno what that was. I'm in an angsty mood right now.