It hadn't been a bad day. Which, relative to Mal's standards, actually meant that it had been a good day. A few flying bullets and only one fairly minor knife wound were chalked up to just another job done and money in the vault.
The day on board the ship had actually been more eventful. Zoe, Jayne and Mal had come back to find the ship in an uproar. Something about River taking a kitchen knife and slicing her forearm open. Jayne's chuckle, "Girl got what was coming to her," hadn't helped matters.
A few slammed doors later, Mal had been the only one still outside his bunk. Which left him with plenty of time to lean over the railing overlooking the main hall of Serenity. A man needed peace to think, once in a while. Or actually, in this case, just to stare.
There was a sudden rustle and Mal jumped.
That gorram girl had appeared right next to him. So close that he could feel the fabric of her dress brush against his upper arm.
River wore her usual, a cast-off from Kaylee. Worn, faded fabric that even then couldn't hide the gaudy flower print. It hung on her thin frame, swirling as she crept – no, floated – around the ship. A large bandage enveloped her left arm, the white gauze almost merging with her pale skin.
Their own personal phantom to haunt the ship. It was enough to give anyone the heebie-jeebies.
But right now, there was something different about her. She peered at his arm resting on the railing. Not with her usual vacant stare, but really looking and seeing. Examining every pore on his arm. Her concentration reminded him of Simon when he dug out a bullet and sewed shut the wound. But River was looking with fascination, not cold, scientific calculation.
She reached out and touched his arm. Stroked it. Then ran her little finger along it so delicately he felt each individual hair lift up as it passed.
It felt strange to be touched like this. Touched gently. Sure, Zoe gave him the occasional shoulder squeeze. But her touch was firm and told of brute strength that hid underneath her grasp. Kaylee gave him hugs when she was in an even more exuberant mood than usual. They were sweet and open, lasting only a few seconds.
But River's touch was different. And, Mal suddenly thought, somehow more intimate than anything he'd ever shared with a woman.
River picked up his arm with both hands and turned it over. She leaned down, placing her ear against his forearm.
"I can hear it," she whispered as though she was sharing an important secret with him.
Mal waited for more. Nothing came. River's eyes were closed and she had a small smile on her face.
"Hear what?" he finally asked, feeling for the first time as if he were the one at fault for not understanding River.
"It."
As far as explanations, that was not exactly helpful. Mal started to roll his eyes, then jerked them wide open. River had touched his arm with her lips, brushing it slowly from his wrist towards his elbow, following the path of a protruding vein. Mal could feel her warm breath.
He wasn't sure what she was doing. It wasn't a kiss, or at least it was certainly nothing like any kiss he'd ever experienced.
It tickled. But Mal held his arm steady.
"You're in there. It flows. Swoosh." River reached his elbow and blew on it gently. Then she straightened up, slow and graceful like Kaylee always admired. But she still stared down at his arm, both of her hands clutching it tight. When she spoke, she addressed his arm.
"Simon's mad at me. Didn't like how I separated the skin." There was a slight catch in her voice.
Mal looked down at her bandaged arm.
"Why'd you do it?"
"Wanted to get in," River said, emphasizing her last two words. She glared at his arm. Mal could swear he felt fire where her gaze scoured his skin. He suddenly wanted to look into her eyes.
He reached with his other arm and tried to lift her chin. She resisted, a whine of frustration spilling from the back of her throat. Then she gave in, directing her glare right at him. Her eyes were full of water and rimmed with red.
"Why? Why'd you suddenly decide it was necessary for the edge of a knife to make acquaintance with your arm?"
"Told you!" River jerked her chin out of his hand. "Wanted to get in. Like you. To be inside. Running through my skin. Just trying to do what Simon wants. But now, he's mad at me." A tear fell from her right eye. Mal watched as it rolled down her cheek and disappeared into her mouth. She didn't seem to notice.
"The doc's just worried-like about you."
"No!" It was loud and harsh, like nothing he'd ever heard from River before. "Simon's mad at me. But told me he's not. He's a liar." She spat out the last word.
Mal smiled at that. Simon couldn't lie if his life depended on it. His performance as a mud-buyer in Canton had proved that.
"River, Simon ain't exactly -"
She cut him off like she already knew what he was going to say.
"He's a liar," she said in a low serious tone. "A good one. Always been one. Once when I was nine, robbers came into the house. He made me hide. Told the robbers he was home alone. They believed him." She stopped.
River's gaze had drawn inward at the memory. Mal felt a large gap extend between them.
"Maybe the doc got a bit mad. But it ain't at you. It's more like directed at the ship in general. At circumstances and the like. Probably mad at me. But not at you. He ain't a liar, River."
River shook her head, one curt shake of dismissal.
"Simon's good liar. Me too. But he never lied to me before." There was a long pause as she stared off into the distance. Then her eyes suddenly snapped to his. "He told me everything he wants is right here. He meant it. But now?"
She stared at him, piercing his eyes. Demanding a response. Mal felt his mouth open, then close as he tried to find the words to say. Silence imprisoned them like a heavy iron box.
And then it was too late. She dropped his arm. It fell like a dead weight and Mal was surprised to find that it hurt almost as much as the time he'd dislocated his shoulder in one of his gruffer bar fights.
River drifted back across the bridge. A cold draft replaced the warmth at Mal's side. He suddenly wanted to go after her. Drag her back.
"What happened?" It came out loud, forced. But River stopped and turned, a questioning look on her face.
"To?"
"To the robbers?"
It wasn't the right question, Mal realized the second he said it. River was already disconnecting, staring far-off into the distance.
"Knocked Simon out. Made me mad. So I locked them in the basement."
She stared somewhere to the left of Mal's head for a few moments. Then she turned and drifted out of sight. Mal thought he heard a whoosh of her dress as she turned the corner.
Mal stared at the empty space. He shivered. He suddenly wanted to go straight to his bunk and slip under his warm, heavy covers. But somehow he couldn't take the first step.
He still felt her hands imprinted on his arm.
A/N: Thank you for reading! I cannot wait for Serenity to come out- from what I've heard (from my non-spoilery existence) there will be some major River character development. And, I'm sure, lots of great fanfiction written as a result :)