WHAT ABOUT TOMORROW?

By

Dimaris

Chapter 1: Ranger

RPOV

I was driving back to Trenton from DC in what Steph called my "zone." My Babe thought I was planning an invasion of a "third world country." Little did she know I used the time to think about my family and, most of all, how I could make a life with my Babe, Stephanie Plum, or as the press called her, the Bombshell Bounty Hunter? Although she didn't think so, Babe was a sweetheart who showed affection and concern not only to her friends but even to her regular skips she brought back to jail.

Until now I wasn't able to offer her anything more than friendship since I could be called up at a moment's notice, sent to some hell hole around the world and might not even make back in one piece if at all. The meeting in DC with the Pentagon brass was about them trying to persuade me to renew my personal contract with the government in Special Operations. I told them "no," in no uncertain terms. Thirteen years was enough!

Yes, me, the bad ass Ricardo Carlos Manoso known as Ranger on the street and Carlos to my family. It was my time to admit my feelings and desires to Stephanie and I was scared shitless. I knew she wanted me but did she love me. God, I was so in love with her I couldn't speak most of the time. To me the worst thing a woman can do is make a guy fall for her and not catch him. The problem is my beautiful Babe didn't realize I had fallen for her and that was my fault.

I feel the hunger you feel in your touch

Burning my body and soul

And it's frightening just wanting somebody so much

So close to losing control

I'm always in control. The Special Forces training taught me how to control my emotions and never show fear. It works for dangerous situations and business but in my personal life—not so much. Now, though, I was terrified that my heart would be broken; I'd never offered it before. I was married for a short time to Rachel so our daughter, Julie, could have my name and financial support but I never loved Rachel. I adored Stephanie. I wanted to worship her, body and soul, for the rest of my life.

But Darlin' don't make me surrender too soon

I'm so afraid of the fall

Please give it time to be tender

And pretend it won't hurt at all

And what about the fucking cop, Morelli? Was Stephanie so attached to him she wouldn't want what I stupidly called "someday" with me? Trying to talk to my Babe about my feelings for her usually ended with my being an idiot saying things like "my life doesn't lend itself to relationships" or "I don't do stupid things like marriage or children" or some qualifier after saying "I love you;" but most of the time I was just struck dumb. Dumb and dumber that's me. God, if love is being stupid together, then I qualified enough for the both of us. When it comes to my Babe, my stupidity knows no bounds like the time I made that crazy deal with her when she was hunting DeChooch. I thought one night as her lover would end my obsession. Wrong! That night of passion and intimacy just increased my devotion to her.

But Darlin' don't make me surrender too soon

I'm so afraid of the fall

Please give it time to be tender

And pretend it won't hurt at all

Today I want to change all that. It's Valentine's Day and I plan to seriously talk to Stephanie about what I want our future to be. To prepare her I sent her a dozen red roses with a card that simply said "Babe." I'm pretty sure she will be happy to receive them but is probably confused AGAIN by me not saying more. I hope she won't send me away when I tell her I want more than her friendship and, if she does, I hope I don't lose that friendship. More than anything I wanted her to be mine.

Slowly be gentle each step of the way

I've never been in love before

Let me believe you won't turn away

After I've opened the door

Carlos, it's time to step up, suck it up, and go after what you want and I want it all! If she'll have me, I'll offer everything that I am—my life, my love, my heart and my name—but I'm afraid she won't want those things, too. She's independent and opinionated. She doesn't care about money or possessions, well, except for shoes, donuts, her hamster, birthday cake and, of course, her friends. Would she let me be more than a friend?

But Darlin' don't make me surrender too soon

I'm so afraid of the fall

Please give it time to be tender

And pretend it won't hurt at all

I just pray I'm enough for her. After surviving the torture handed out by the worst enemies of the United States, would I survive the pain if she turns me down?

Please Give It Time to Be Tender by Kris Kristofferson and Rita Coolidge (1972)

A/N: Response to Black Heart Valentine challenge (Perfect Plum) and Cara and Teena's Let's Talk about Love challenge (Babe_Squad). Oh, and of course, don't own Janet Evanovich's characters just like to play with them, especially Ranger. Sadly, I'm not making any money.

Word Count (excluding song lyrics) = 726