Merry Christmas my readers! (Or whoever ya are!) Feliz Navidad mi amigos! (Hopefully.) This is my super random idea but I just saw Promises, Promises (SEE IT! IT WAS HILARIOUS! Oh wait, you can't anymore. D= Sad day!) and there was this scene where Chuck went into a bar and met Marge and basically it was one of the funniest things I'd seen that reminded me of a glee thing recently. Marge was just like April so yeah. Oh and if some things April says sound a bit weird and stuff, that's me quoting a Molly Shannon Marge MacDougall line. Anyways, HAPPY HOLIDAYS! FELIZ NAVIDAD! MERRY CHRISTMAS! HAPPY HANUKKAH! (Wait did I even say those right? Oh well, sorry if I didn't.) Enjoy!
DISCLAIMER: A FACT CAN BE A BEAUTIFUL THING… but not when the fact is I don't own Promises, Promises or Glee. Ryan Murphy owns Glee and Neil Simon owns Promises, Promises.
Oh right! So bold is Will, italics is April, and bold italics is both, got it? Okay!
Will Schuester couldn't believe where he was at that moment. No one else in the bar would have expected it either if they knew who he was. Yes, he was in a bar—getting drunk. That night, he just wanted to get Emma out his mind. He had just learned that Carl, her boyfriend, had taken her to Vegas and married her. She was gone; he didn't have a chance with her anymore.
"What did you expect?" he told himself from his seat. "It's not like she wants to be alone forever! It's not like she wouldn't eventually find someone to marry instead!"
As Will took another drink from his beer bottle, a high, squeaky voice cut through the air, "Hey, you! Another one right here!"
There, on the stool just a seat down from him sat a tiny blonde.
"I think I'll be all right," Will decided as he looked at her.
Her skin was smooth and lightly tanned. High cheekbones rounded out her pretty face, and she had lovely blue-green eyes, though clouded from the many drinks she had drank that evening. Golden blond locks cascaded down to her shoulders, lying in soft ringlets that framed her face. She wore a tight magenta dress that complimented her slim but defined figure nicely along with a pair of gray gloves. On her feet were the highest heels Will had ever seen. Slung on her shoulders, though, was the strangest coat he had ever seen. It looked like it was made of… feathers?
"Do you like my coat?" she asked, noticing the good-looking man who was looking at her. "It's owl," she said, stroking her shoulder.
Will raised his eyebrows. "What?"
"Well, I know it's made of the bird with the big eyes that goes HOOO!" she replied, widening here eyes and framing them with her thumb and forefinger.
Will smiled, glad to have someone to talk to that night… even if she was a bit crazy. "Can I get you a drink?" he offered as he signaled the bar man to get him another drink as that he finished his own. The man ignored him.
"Nah, I got it," the blonde replied, smoothly slinging her glass down the glossed table and directly to the bartender, who promptly refilled it and slid it right back into her gloved hand. "Oh, and I should tell ya—I am NOT a pickup." As she said this, she nonchalantly crossed her legs while flashing Will in the process. "I'm just here for company. Company, and conversation. People can get lonely ya know."
"Yeah," he replied, though somewhat distracted by the woman.
"So, what's your name?" she asked, tipping her glass to her mouth and taking a gulp of its contents.
"Will, Will Schuester," he replied
"Will, short for William, I'm guessin'? Classy sounding. I'm just plain 'ol April Rhodes," she said, a subtle Southern accent coming out of her mouth.
"Well, it's nice to meet you April," Will said. "It's nice to at least have someone to talk to on Christmas."
"Of course! No one should be alone, then they're just some humbug," April replied. She uncrossed her legs, flashing Will again. "Of course, YOU'RE not a humbug! You're actually kinda good lookin'. And I don't mean that in a sexual way, but I don't mean it in a NON sexual way either!"
As the tiny blonde said that, the curvaceous woman continued to do things relatively provocatively right before Will's eyes. Will, being the usual gentleman he (somewhat) is, he attempted to ignore it, but one has a hard time ignoring a tiny blonde that practically hiking a skirt up to her waist to get ones attention.
As Will took another drink of beer, April attempted to tilt her glass into her mouth again, but she's out of her drink again. She let's out a drunk sounding laugh, and hands off her glass to another bar man who hands her another glass. She's obviously a regular here, Will thought mindlessly.
Soon after, a song comes on over the speakers that sounds remotely familiar to Will when April makes a high-pitched yelling noise.
"Oh! I know this song!" she exclaims, starting to sing. As she does, Will begins to understand why it sounds so familiar and joins the tiny blonde.
AND… A… FACT CAN BE A BEAUTIFUL THING
WHEN THE FACT I'M FACIN' IS YOU
A FACT CAN BE A TERRIBLE THING
WHEN THE DREAMS YOU'VE BEEN DREAMING
FALL THROUGH
FORGET THE PAST, AND… THINK ABOUT THE PRESENT
RIGHT NOW IS EVERYTHING
FORGET THE PAST, AND… THINK ABOUT THE PRESENT
THE PRESENT'S VERY… pleasant.
WHO CARES WHAT THE FUTURE WILL BRING
THERE'S JUST NO PREDICTING A THING
DONT WAIT FOR A MIRACLE—
BECAUSE IT'S CHRISTMAS
NOT A TIME TO BE ALONE… WITH… MEMORIES
CHRISTMAS IT'S SUPPOSED TO BE A HAPPY HOLIDAY
THROW A LITTLE JOY MY WAY
YOU COULD REALLY MAKE MY DAY…
AND… A… FACT CAN BE A BEAUTIFUL THING
WHEN I SEE WHAT I'M SEEIN' IN YOU…
A FACT CAN BE A WONDERFUL THING
WHEN YOUR HOPES TO BE HAPPY
COME TRUE
WHATS GONE IS GONE, AND… DON'T YOU EVER DOUBT IT
WAKE UP AND START TO LIVE
WHATS GONE IS GONE, SO… LEARN TO LIVE WITHOUT IT
AND NEVER THINK ABOUT IT
WHO CARES WHAT THE FUTURE WILL BRING
THERES JUST NO PREDICTING A THING
DONT WAIT FOR A MIRACLE—
BECAUSE IT'S CHRISTMAS
NOT A TIME TO BE ALONE… WITH… MEMORIES
CHRISTMAS IT'S SUPPOSED TO BE A HAPPY HOLIDAY
THROW A LITTLE JOY MY WAY
DO WE REALLY HAVE TO STAY
THROW A LITTLE JOY MY WAY…
The song continued as follows, and the two continued their singing. Inevitably, the song eventually ended. During the course of it, Will and April had gotten plenty more drinks between verses. April probably finished at least five more glasses and Will could easily say similar. He and April were standing in the middle of the room, his arms entwined around her waist and hers encircling his neck.
Considering their current position they were standing in, and that Will was getting more and more attracted to the tiny blonde by the minute, he picked her up and pulled her into a kiss, fogged by intoxication between the many drinks he had that evening and the constant flirting the woman had been doing all night to lure him in. As he did, a few bar workers began to pull the two apart as someone threw them their coats.
The end.
Haha there ya go! The end was crappy but that's seriously how the song ended in Promises lol but a teeny bit different. In the stage one, Chuck was dancing with Marge and the ensemble sang then Chuck and Marge started making out onstage and people pulled them apart.