Mello felt Matt's soft touch brush his left shoulder as he got out of bed. He had a city underworld to run, and he couldn't lounge in bed all morning. As he dug through his dresser searching for a particular pair of black skinny jeans, he felt Matt's eyes on his naked back, lingering on his scars.
The scars from the explosion covered nearly half of his back, his upper left arm and shoulder, the left side of his neck and the left side of his face. Mello didn't think much about the scars. It wasn't like there was anything he could do about them anyway. It was hard to blend into a crowd, but that had never been Mello's priority. He was just glad he still had his gorgeous blond hair and the sight in his left eye. Plus, the scars made other Mafia types take him more seriously.
Matt thought a lot of the scars, it seemed. His gaze seemed drawn to them, and he caressed the scarred skin when they made love. He preferred to kiss Mello on his left cheek, and would always drape his arm across Mello's left shoulder. Why? The explosion wasn't Matt's fault, so it couldn't be guilt. Was it just some sort of weird fetish? Doubtful. He and Matt had been roommates at Wammy's, he would have picked up on something that unusual.
"Hey, Matt," Mello broke the silence "Are you staring at my scars again? What is your deal?"
"Why? Does it bother you?"
"Well, no, it just seems...strange. They're just scars after all."
Matt propped himself up on an elbow "But they're not just scars for me, they're a reminder."
"Of what? That explosion was my fault, you had nothing to do with it."
"Corpses don't have scars," Matt paused, "My greatest fear is losing you, Mel, and it almost happened. It terrified me because I really don't know what I would do without you. You have those scars because you survived. Those scars are made of living flesh. I love those scars because they remind me that you're still here."
"I guess I never thought about it that way" Mello ran a hand through his hair.
"You wouldn't. You don't value your own life, which is why I have to value it for you." Matt looked down and started fiddling with the blankets.
Mello looked at the man lying on the bed. He had grown up so much from the stupid kid that had moved into Wammy's all those years ago. Then again, Mello was a stupid kid back then, too. Matt was the only person he had ever honestly loved, and Matt loved him back. Loved him enough to track him down and take care of him after the explosion. Yeah, it made sense why he loved Mello's scars.
"Then….thanks." Mello hoped that he had communicated enough with that thanks. He wanted to thank Matt for valuing his life when even he thought of it as forfeit. He wanted to thank him for valuing the scars that some would probably call a disfigurement. But the words weren't coming to him right now. He just turned to the closet to grab a belt.
"And I don't mind a bit. Enjoy the view all you want from back there. I'm sure it's spectacular." As he said the last sentence, Mello threw an impish smirk over his shoulder.
Matt gave a smirk of his own, "Don't mind if I do."