Don't Mind the Horns
By Shinku
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Don't mind the horns, they're just there to prop up the halo. -anon
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Samuel Jones was just about ready to call it quits.
He had been bitten, scratched, chased around some strange, moving, rock maze, and even propositioned by some odd chicken-lizard that insisted it was a goblin.
Sam had his doubts.
However, of all these things, it was nearly getting chucked into some unholy smelling swamp that really undid him. There were just not any words to describe the stench of the place.
So… no. Forget it. Rachel had been a (mostly) sweet kid, and he would admit that wishing her away in a fit of pique hadn't been one of his better moments, but this place… this place was just hell. Sam was barely three hours into his allotted thirteen and he couldn't even begin to comprehend the crazy blonde guy's assertion that someone actually had managed to make it through this nightmare in one piece.
Just… No. It wasn't possible. Whatever chemicals the guy was using to keep his hair like it was had obviously done bad things to his brain. Logic had to be reasserted sometime, and-
"Having some trouble?"
Sam flinched violently, twisting around like a startled cat as his eyes darted about for the source of the voice.
A soft, childish giggle sounded out, before a playful tone cooed out, "Aw, come on now, I'm not that scary."
It was a girl, the teen finally noticed. A very tiny girl, probably only around ten or so years old.
"Who are you?" He asked cautiously, careful to keep his tone as polite and neutral as possible.
After the advances of the chicken-lizard he'd learned not to take any chances with appearances. That creepy little thing was a frightening fighter when it felt insulted.
The little girl grinned eerily, pale blonde hair glinting in the light. "I'm Fainche, and you're Samuel Jones. Are you lost?"
The tempting song of opportunity sang over the warning bells that abruptly echoed through his head at the sound of his name. With every weird thing that he had seen and experienced in this place, he reasoned, what could it possibly hurt if one kid recognized him? After all, if the other creatures he had encountered in this place only needed to look at him once to call him, 'Runner' then it was only logical to assume that they all knew who he was, right?
"Yes," Sam smiled, pushing his uneasiness to the back of his mind. "I am. Do you know how to get to the center of this thing?"
The girl-child's grin melted into a playful smile. "Of course I do. How else do you think I found you?"
The teen tried not to think too hard on what that could mean.
"I… guess that makes sense. Do you think you could show me to the center? I could really use the help."
The little blonde twisted lightly back and forth on her feet, head tilted slight in thought. "I don't know… What's in it for me?"
Sam began to feel some of that carefully kept uneasiness push itself to the front of his thoughts. What did you she mean, 'what was in it for her?'
"Well," he began, "you really would be helping me quite a bit, and I don't exactly have a lot with me. Wouldn't the knowledge that you did something kind for me be enough?"
"You mean a 'warm and fuzzy feeling' kind of kindness?" She asked flatly, her twisting motions abruptly stopping. "You have got to be kidding me. Boring. Try again."
The boys mouth dropped open in shock. "But… but I need to find my sister! They could be hurting her in that castle! Don't you understand that she could be in danger?"
The tiny girl snorted. "Don't be silly, the only one in any danger here is you. The Labyrinth would never allow a Wished-Away to come to harm. What would be the point in punishing the victim?" The little blonde sniped primly.
The unease Sam had been fighting against immediately tore itself to the forefront of his mind, and the boy finally began to wonder why such a young child was wandering around in such an obviously dangerous place.
"Simple Runner, you make a much more appealing target for her," she stated boldly, her gaze eerily unwavering as she watched him.
Samuel's hands unexpectedly began to shake as the reality of the situation finally sunk in.
Runner.
All the other creatures that he had encountered in this strange place had called him that too. Usually right before they had retaliated for something he had done to offend them. Allowing himself to look at the girl a little more closely, he was just able to catch sight of a single, pointed ear through her hair as she shifted.
The teen felt sick.
"You're not human," he stated almost numbly.
The girl-child didn't even twitch. "No, I'm not."
Sam hid his hands in his pockets.
"I never meant for this to happen," he muttered softly, willing her to understand his side of things. "I was just angry. I didn't think anything would come of an unheard wish. I didn't think anyone was listening."
The child's candid expression became something cruel and unyielding at his honesty. "Foolish human. There is always someone listening."
The teen averted his eyes and said nothing.
What could he say to that? The damage had already been done, and by the looks of things, it wasn't likely to be undone.
After several long moments Fainche spoke up, "How about that necklace you're wearing? You obviously don't care about it if you're letting it bounce around in this mess outside of your shirt. Give me that, and I'll guide you to the center of the Labyrinth."
The teen's eyes shot open. What? "But… I thought…?"
"Are you not interested anymore?" She asked innocently, once again twisting back and forth on the balls of her feet. "If that's the case, then I'll just head off and-"
"No! Wait!" Sam said frantically. "Don't go!"
"Oh? Are you sure?" She asked liltingly beginning to take a step away from him.
"Yes! I'm sure!" He quickly agreed, lifting the necklace from over his head and swiftly handing it off. It wasn't like it was anything really important, just something he'd picked up in a flea market for his girlfriend a few weeks ago. "You can have my necklace if you take me. Just don't try to lose me or anything, alright?"
"Of course not!" Fainche chirped agreeably. "I wouldn't go back on a deal! I'll lead you to the center just like I said."
The teen watched as the little girl slid the chain over her own neck and took a moment to admire the curious little trinket with obvious fascination before abruptly letting it fall to her chest and turning on her heel. "This way," she said easily, and began walking.
Samuel Jones didn't think twice as he quickly trotted after her, never once hearing or seeing the goblins that giggled quietly at his retreating back. Peeking out of their hiding spots once he was out of sight, one turned to another and said amusedly, "Not too smart, that one."
A wicked grin answered him followed by a quick, "Real not smart. He never should have give the trinket to Little Queen. She knows what it is."
"He'll regret it soon enough!" Another announced as the rest laughed jubilantly at the prospective entertainment.
They, after all, knew better than to make a deal with Fainche.
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They walked in relative silence for a long time.
The only sound between them was the soft crunch of their feet against the dry leaves and dirt as they progressed to the castle. Fainche, for all that she wasn't human, was a very attentive guide. When he tired, she called them to a stop to rest, and when he showed signs of being hungry or thirsty, she disappeared long enough to return with something for him. It was a kindness that they hadn't bartered for, and Sam was beginning to feel a little more at ease with what was going on around him.
He should have known better.
"What is this place?" Sam asked as they reached the edge of an bizarre looking forest, stopping briefly to toe the edge of the new ground.
The little blonde smiled. "This is the Forest of UpDown. If we cut through here, we can shave off two hours from our walk."
"Two hours…" The teen hummed thoughtfully. "That sounds pretty good. Are there any more shortcuts we can take?"
The girl-child's smile was all sugar and innocence. "Of course. I'll be sure to take as many as I can, alright?"
Samuel grinned, and naively took his first steps into the forest. "Great!"
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The forest, as it turned out, was a truly remarkable place. Instead of the gentle crunch he had gotten so used to hearing during the first part of their hike, he was now rather fascinated by the heavy ding that resounded from under them with each step. Beneath the odd smatter of fallen leaves and anemone, was not dirt and stone, but rather a large reflective mirror.
Staring down into his own likeness as they walked, Sam couldn't help but be curious as to why such an amazing place had such an odd name.
"Fainche? What is UpDown? You mentioned that it was the name of the forest earlier."
The tiny girl glanced over her shoulder and smiled a sweet smile. "UpDown isn't a what, he's a who. This is his forest."
"Oh." Sam said curiously, glancing around at the forest again. "Is UpDown like you then? I… uh… I mean..."
Fainche laughed. "No, UpDown isn't like me. Actually, I would say he's rather one of kind."
Warning bells began to play a frantic little tune in the back of his head as Sam unexpectedly heard the forest around them go still. The birds that had been singing so clearly a moment before abruptly lost their voices, and the handful of squirrel-like creatures that had been scurrying around swiftly darted up the trees and into carefully made little burrows.
Sam nervously recalled an old saying his grandmother had been fond of.
Speak of the devil and he shall appear.
Like the sounding of a death knell, the teen distantly heard the eerie tinkle of what almost sounded like glass chimes jingling in the distance.
Ting-ting-ting… Ting-ting-ting… Ting-ting-ting…
"Fainche…?" The teen asked softly, "what was that sound?"
The young girl giggled. "That's UpDown, of course. He always stops to say hello to people that wander this far into his forest."
Sam felt the hairs of the back of his neck rise as he heard the jingling again. It was a steady, clear chiming that sounded at near regular intervals as it gradually began to grow closer.
Ting-ting-ting… Ting-ting-ting… Ting-ting-ting…
"If UpDown isn't like you," the teen asked apprehensively, "then what is he?"
The tiny blonde smiled. "Why don't you turn around and look for yourself?"
Ting-ting-ting&… Ting-ting-ting… Ting-ting-ting…
Cautiously, Sam did as was suggested - and abruptly felt his heart fall into his shoes.
Ting-ting-ting… Ting-ting-ting… Ting-ting-ting…
It looked like the back of an old-world sea-serpent, terrifying black spines breaking through the surface of the mirror with quicksilver swiftness as the large quills chimed melodiously along their journey. The sound was a sharp contrast to the sheer size and dread that the creature inspired.
The teen glanced briefly back at Fainche, his eyes wide and frightened. "What do we do now?"
The girl-child grinned. "We say, 'hello', of course. UpDown! Over here, UpDown! Come here, boy!"
At the tiny blonde's call the beast abruptly abandoned its quick but easy pace, and shot over to the girl with all the speed of an eager puppy. Within moments a massive serpentine head was pulling itself from the mirrored ground, mercurial rivers of liquid glass streaming down its scaled body as it towered chillingly over them.
Sam flinched violently.
"Aw," the little girl cooed up at the beast, "has no one been to see you, UpDown?"
The sea-monster made an odd wheezing rumble as it bent its head down to her level, its bearing unnervingly passive as she reached out and ran her hand along its muzzle.
"Fainche," the teen asked hesitantly, "what are you doing?"
"Saying hello to UpDown, Samuel. What are you doing?"
Trying very hard not to run screaming from the forest.
"Just… waiting on you…" The teen offered slowly as the serpent's eyes slid open from the half closed doze they had fallen into to watch him purposefully. They were not the eyes of a tamed pet.
Fainche diligently ignored her charge's obvious unease and continued to speak cutely to the monster in front of her.
"Isn't he such an impatient thing, UpDown? Surely we can spare just a few minutes to play with you, right?"
The massive beast rumbled contentedly at her words, and Sam couldn't fight the niggling sense of something being wrong.
Deciding against doing something rashly that might anger the only person that was willing to help him through the Labyrinth, the teen chose to ask a neutral but probing, "What kind of game are you going to play with him, Fainche?"
The girl-child finally turned away from the sea-serpent to observe Sam in silent amusement. "I'm not going to play any game with him, Samuel. You already are."
The fear that had begun to abate with each peaceful moment between them and the monster abruptly returned with vengeance.
Oh, heck no.
Glancing around himself quickly, Samuel hurriedly tried to figure out how he was "playing" with UpDown. He hadn't moved from his spot since the serpent had come at Fainche's call, not once.
What was he missing?
And then he noticed it, a faint tugging at the soles of his sneakers. Almost like something was trying to pull away from him.
The teen felt his breath catch in his throat.
"Fainche," he forced out, "why is UpDown called, UpDown?"
The tiny girl's grin had that terrible, knowing edge to it again. The one that warned him that he'd been foolish to trust so blindly.
"UpDown is called what he is because he is always in two places at once. He is Up," she informed him dutifully, patting the beast's snout, "and he is Down." she stated, pointing to the mirrored ground at their feet.
Letting his gaze follow her gesture downward, Sam felt the color completely drain from his face as he watched the beast's previously unnoticed reflection stealthily slink up behind his own likeness, its body coiling for a killing strike.
NO!
Sam hadn't even realized he had moved until he found himself a good five feet from his initial starting point, the feeling of sea-moistened scales sliding cross his chest and face even as he watched the monster eye him from under Fainche's hand.
Looking back down into the mirror, it wasn't hard to local his reflection, nor spot the way it slid helplessly along the side of the sea-serpent as the beast's own refection continued to move past it. Sam took another step back, pulling his likeness with him, and felt the sensation across his chest and face cease.
Sam looked up at the little blonde with wide eyes.
Fainche grinned. "He's only playing Tag, Samuel. You don't have to be so jumpy."
"Tag?" The teen wheezed. "That was not Tag! Why did you bring me here if you knew this… animal was here?"
UpDown raised his head up sharply and glared down at the boy, offended.
Sam refused to flinch.
"Our agreement was that I take you to the center of the Labyrinth in exchange for your necklace," the girl-child stated frankly. "In no way did you specify the path you would like to take. If you had wanted a safer route you should have bartered for it."
The teen opened his mouth to argue the point when a deep, cultured voice smoothly overrode him.
"The Little Miss is quite right. If you had wanted a certain kind of path, you should have stated that fact immediately once the negotiation had begun. I'm afraid you have no one to blame but yourself concerning this oversight. I'll also have you know that I resent that animal remark. I am a proper citizen of the Labyrinth, and not some common animal! Just because I have an affection for a good, rousing game of Tag every once in a while is nothing to judge me by!"
It was too much, just too much.
Without any warning or fanfare, the teen's eyes abruptly rolled up into his head and he passed out with a faintly musical thump.
The sea-serpent looked down at the boy with a faintly puzzled expression, before turning to the young fae at his side. "Was it something I said?"
"Not at all, dear one," the tiny blonde cooed pleasantly. "You know what these Runners are like these days, not a one has a constitution quite like mother did."
The great beast bobbed its head thoughtfully. "Too true. They say your mother was truly one of a kind during her Run."
Fainche smiled with obvious pride, and there was a short, comfortable silence between them before - "I don't mean to pry, Little Miss, but didn't you say the boy traded his necklace for your assistance?"
The little fae grinned wickedly. "Why yes he did, UpDown. Didn't even think twice about it."
The monster rumbled discontentedly. "I do hope you don't plan on informing him on what he gave away. I dare say that he might not be able to take the stress of it."
"Oh, don't worry my friend. I don't plan on saying a thing."
Smiling mischievously to herself, Fainche absentmindedly played with the small wish dangling about her neck as she began to consider ways of getting her charge to the other side of the forest.
Yes, it truly was a pity Samuel Jones hadn't known what he'd had.
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First off, I would like to dedicate this first story to daughterofthe1king, kingdomfantasyanime435, Tana-san, and cherehatter for all their gentle encouragements, and thoughtful messages just to ensure I wasn't dead. I really appreciate all the extra kindness you've shown me.
Now, I know it's been a long time coming, but I've finally decided to start writing out the one-shots I promised. I'll be writing as inspiration hits, so expect a little time between one-shots. And again, to all my wonderful readers, thank you very much for reading. If you have a special idea in mind you would like to request, you're more than welcome to PM me.
Merry Christmas everyone, and please don't forget to leave a contribution in the little box. -Shi