We Start Again
An X-Files Fanfic
Set directly after Season 11 Ep 1 - My Struggle III
Mulder was seeing red.
As soon as Skinner walked off, he was furious, he was finding it hard to breathe, to function properly, as he had trusted this man, with Scully's life, hell, with his own life. He asked him to look for her, but he obviously didn't try very hard.
He smelt of smoke.
Every fiber of his being was full of rage, his heart rate was high, higher than it should be, and he was so ready to go after him..
"Mulder.."
He heard her voice first, by his side, soft but firm.
He knew that tone, she was trying to calm him down, to bring him back to earth, back to her side, the only place where he felt sane and safe.
Even now, after their separation, she was still his rock, his touchstone..
"Mulder.." She repeated again, with more urgency this time, then he felt her hand on his wrist. He closed his eyes as he felt his whole body respond to that. He loved her more than anyone on this earth, and she still had that amazing effect on his senses.
"Mulder, please. Come on." She soothed, and he finally managed to turn to look at her and opened his eyes. He softened immediately, but the sadness he felt was overwhelming, seeing her beautiful face so messed up like that, her scars on the side of her face, from where she had hit the steering wheel.
He wanted to be angry at her for being so foolish, she should have known better, being a Doctor. But he couldn't be mad at her for trying to find their son. He couldn't be mad at her for long.. ever..
"He smelt of smoke Scully." He managed to say weakly, as she was making his rage turn into putty, as she was looking at him with her wide blue eyes, pleading him to calm down internally. She nodded and tilted her head slightly, and looked at his lips for a second, then back up at his eyes. "Scully-"
"I know..." She stopped him softly. "..But I need you to calm down."
He sighed and wanted to bend and hide his face in the crook of her neck, like he always used to when they were together, whenever he felt lost or that he needed her, her strength and her comfort. He missed her scent, he missed the soft feel of her skin. He missed it all.
Even though they were closer now than they had been in the past few months, something had shifted since she had this seizure, may be she was feeling vulnerable, but he seemed more willing to be close to him, but even so, it wasn't enough for him.
He wished she knew, if only she knew how much he still loved her, and always would.
Scully's heart was racing fast too as Skinner and Mulder nearly fought in the middle of the emergency room.
She was not supposed to be getting so worked up, but she was still on edge after what just happened.
Mulder had killed that man, to save her life.
And now this with Skinner, the man who they trusted with their lives. How could this be happening!?
She was upset too, but she needed to calm down. She had learnt that lesson the hard way. She couldn't deny she felt foolish for going off like that in the car, at high risk of seizure. But she was not rational at all when it came to William.
"You should rest." Mulder said softly and snapped her out of her thoughts. She still held his wrist in her fingers and then he slowly slid his hand up to take her hand in his instead, and laced his fingers with hers before she could pull away. She glanced down at their entwined fingers and then looked back up at his hazel eyes and felt her stomach flip a little. He looked exhausted, scared, angry, all those emotions yet, he was still the Mulder that she had loved for all those years, and those eyes never lied.
"I'm sorry." He said gently, and sighed, looking guilty. She frowned a little and shook her head.
"Mulder, you don't need to apologize."
He sighed again and gave her a tiny smile on the corner of his lips, a sad smile.
"You should be in bed." He stated softly, and then took a step forwards, trying to lead her back there.
She looked at him and didn't move for a moment, until he tugged gently on her hand.
"Come on.." He said with a slightly wider smile, and rubbed his thumb over her knuckles. "Doctors orders." He stated and tilted his head, his eyes twinkled a little in amusement as she was usually the one to say that, yet, she saw that he was serious.
She softened and followed him towards her bed, and she climbed in slowly, careful not to hurt herself any more than she already was.
She was aching all over, from the impact, and not to mention the terrifying fight for her life she had just gone through.
Mulder didn't hold back and pulled the sheet up and over her, helping her get comfortable. She blushed a little as he did, it wasn't usual for them to be acting like this after their break up, yet for so many years it had felt so natural. She blinked slowly and laid her sore head down against the pillows, and even though it was out of character, she let him look after her.
"I'm ok Mulder.." She started, as she couldn't help it.
"Yeah, ok Doc." He said, in a tone which said he wasn't really listening. He wanted her to be safe and well, and he wasn't taking any more chances with her. He smiled again softly and sat down next to her bedside as the police officers finally left the area, and they were left alone. Her doctor was gone now too, as she had checked her over before he went crazy at Skinner. "Do you know how long you will be here for?"
"May be a few more days." Scully said quietly, laying on her back and turning her head to look at him. She felt a little stir crazy laid in that bed, but she had no choice. "She needs to monitor me."
"Hmm..." He hummed and nodded as she spoke and placed his hand over her forearm and caressed her gently, looking at her face.
Scully blinked a few times but kept her gaze on him.
"You should go home." She said sleepily. Mulder shook his head.
"I'm not going anywhere." He said softly, not taking his eyes off her.
"Mulder. Come on, you're exhausted..." She tried to reason with him.
"No Scully, I'm staying here with you. I can't take any chances that someone may be back for you." He said, clearly worried.
He had just killed a man to save her life, and he couldn't bear the thought of not being there if someone came for her again.
"I'm pretty sure he's the only one, plus, I have protection now." She said and motioned with her free hand the FBI agents guarding the glass walls around her bed. He wasn't buying it.
"We don't know that..." He said firmly. She opened her mouth again to speak, to object, but he stopped her. "I'm not going anywhere." He said, firmer this time, not budging.
Scully sighed a little and knew she couldn't convince him otherwise. She kept looking into his eyes, and he stayed with her, alert and protective, even though he had hardly had any sleep in the past 24 hours, since he found her on the floor on their office with blood coming out of her mouth. For a moment, he had been sure she was dead.
He had never been so terrified in all his life..
"Go to sleep." He whispered after a few minutes, as she wasn't closing her eyes, and he really needed her to rest.
She gave in and was drifting off, the pain meds she had received were hitting her hard, and no matter how long she tried to stay awake, she finally fell asleep, with Mulder by her bedside.
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Its so good to be back! Season 11 is such a gift to us all!