Warnings: Language, Angst

"Y/N," the demon who held you captive said as he circled around you. "Never thought I'd get my hands on you with these two gorillas always by your side, but ooops, once they're not babysitting you, you're nothing but a scared little girl."

If he wouldn't have taken away your voice, you would have cursed. At him for calling you a scared little girl, and at yourself for being so stupid. You were supposed to wait for the Winchesters, but when you saw that the demon was about to kill yet another person, you stepped in. The result: The person was dead, and you were chained in his basement, without your voice, because "you're making too much of a fuss."

The demon came to halt in front of you. He crossed his arms in front of his chest, one finger tapping his lips, like he was thinking hard. "Hm, what should I do with you."

You threw yourself forward against the ropes, but nothing happened.

The demon chuckled. "Oh, Y/N, you know it's pointless. You're mine now."

You threw yourself against the ropes again, hoping they would loosen some.

"It's almost adorable. And let me guess," the demon keeled down in front of you, "you're probably still hoping the Winchesters are going to rescue you. Yes? Awww." He laughed and stood up. "You really think just because you happen to be Dean's fuck-toy for now, they're going to come running. Wow, Y/N, I never thought you'd be this naive."

Angry tears were misting your eyes. Yes, they would come, they would save you. You were a friend of the Winchesters. Sam loved you like a little sister, and Dean was your boyfriend, he loved you! He might have never said it… but it didn't matter. You knew it. In two years, he never said it…

The demon was your determination waver and snickered. "Realizing it now, Y/N? You're nothing. You're-"

BANG!

You jumped at the loud noise. There was suddenly a hole in the demons forehead. Orange light flickered threw him, before he sacked down to the ground and the Winchester's came into view.

Dean lowered his gun and the brothers sprinted towards you. Sam cut through the ropes, while Dean looked you over. "Are you okay, princess?"

"Yeah," your voice rough from having spoken in hours and from the tears.

As the last pieces of the ropes fell away, Dean pulled you against his chest in a tight hug. "Let's get out of here."

After a shower and reassuring the boys for the 10th time that you're really okay, you were driving to a diner. As usual, Sam was sitting opposite you, and Dean next to you, after today even closer than usual.

"Are you-"

"Dean, I swear if you ask me one more time if I'm fine, I'm gonna punch you square in the face," you growled.

Dean smiled, put an arm around your shoulder and rubbed your arm. "That's my girl. I'm just worried. You're so quiet."

You shrugged, not meeting his eyes. "I'm just tired, 's all."

It was sort of true, you were tired, but the main reason were the demon's words that kept repeating itself over and over in your head. It was stupid and you should know better. Demons lie and try to hurt they victims not only physically but mentally as well. And after all, the Winchester's came to rescue you and were more than glad to see you alive and well.

"Two Cheeseburger and one Veggieburger," the waitress' voice brought you back to reality.

You nodded and smiled politely, but the smile fell from your face when you saw her. Her cleavage was so deep, you could have sworn her boobs were popping out any moment. She was completely ignoring you and Sam, only smiling at Dean as she sat down the plates. You looked at Dean and your heart twisted painfully when you saw him smiling back.

"…just because you happen to be Dean's fuck-toy for now…"

No! No, Dean loved you! He was smiling at her because that's what you do. You were smiling, Sam was smiling so there's no problem when Dean smiles. He loved you! He might haven't said it…

In two years he hadn't said it once.

Back in the motel, you made a bee-line to the bathroom, avoiding the questioning glances of the brothers. You were getting ready for bed, just wanting to sleep and forget the day and the mess that it left in your head.

After changing, you stepped out of the bathroom. Before you even saw the Winchester's, you felt the thick atmosphere.

Sam was sitting on the small table, eyeing you worriedly. Dean was sitting on the bed your shared with him. His face hold a more serious expression. His posture stiff, his jaw set.

"What's going on, Y/N?" Dean asked, his voice gruff.

"…just because you happen to be Dean's fuck-toy for now… " the demon's voice was feeding your doubt.

You swallowed back the lump in your throat. "Nothing."

"Bullshit," Dean shouted and you jumped.

"Dean," Sam warned. He stood up and crossed the room towards you, lying a hand on his brother's shoulder as he walked past him. He laid his hands on your shoulders and bend down until he was almost at eye-level with you. "Y/N, what happened in the basement."

Sam was giving you his puppy-eyes, and you knew you lost the battle.

"Nothing bad happened, seriously," you said, avoiding both Winchester's eyes. "He just said some pretty nasty things and…and…"

"Y/N, demons lie," Sam said, stroking your arms soothingly. "They would say anything to get to you and you know that."

Yes, you knew that and you hated yourself that his words had this effect on you, but you couldn't help but wonder. Two years and Dean never uttered the L word. Then again, for two years his touches, his glances and his all the little gestures were enough for you. All this time, you thought these little things worth more than those tree words.

Dean got up and stepped in his brother's place, only that he put his arms around you, his head lying on yours. "What did he say, babe?"

"…just because you happen to be Dean's fuck-toy for now…"

"Do you love me?" you asked into his chest, your voice shaking with fear of what he might answer.

Dean drew back immediately and it felt like someone was plucking a knife through your heart and twisting it. Your eyes were burning with tears as you looked up. He looked shocked at your words.

"…just because you happen to be Dean's fuck-toy for now…"

You turned away from Dean, out of his arms. His expression and the silence were answer you feared. He was right. The demon was right.

You didn't come far before your felt a hand around your arm and being turned back around. "Yes. Dammit Y/N, of course I love you!" his voice as painted as you felt. "The hell did this son of a bitch tell you, Y/N?"

You spend the next hour telling the boys what really happened in the basement and what the demon had said. Both brother's did they best to assure you that they both loved you, that you were family, and that they would never not come to your rescue.

"We love you, Y/N, never forget that," Sam whispered in your ear, when he hugged you goodbye before he went back to his room. "And trust me when I say, you mean the world to Dean."

"Thank you, Sam. I love you, too."

"Sleep well, shorty," he ruffled your hair and left the room.

Once you laid in bed with Dean, he pulled you close, until your head and one hand was lying on his chest. He kissed your hair while one hand was drawing circles on your back.

"I'm so sorry, Y/N," he whispered into your hair.

"You have nothing to be sorry for," you said, your finger circling where his anti-possession-tattoo was hiding beneath his shirt. "I was stupid for believing him."

"I should have told you how much I love you. I should have told you ages ago," frustration was lacing his voice.

"Actions speak louder than words, Dean. You've told me how much you love me on a million ways," you told him.

"I always thought I rather show you than tell you, since "I love you" never seem to quite express what I was feeling. You mean so much to me and I'm not good with words, so I thought I'd rather show you than tell you," Dean explained. But that'll change from now on. I make sure you'll never doubt us again." He pressed a kiss to the top of your head and soon his heartbeat lulled you to sleep. The heart that was beating only for you.