Disclaimer: I'm not Stephenie Meyer therefore do not own the Twilight Series...sniff

So a friend of mine asked me if there were a fifth twilight book what would it be called and what would it be about. So I had my theories and then decided to call it Midday Moon. The reason why is explained in this one-shot. Enjoy!

Midday Moon

I had just sneaked out of my parent's house. I simply walked out the back door. How disappointingly easy.

I knew my dad wouldn't be home that morning. Aunt Alice had told me she had a vision of him leaving the house on some errand. Something about surprising my mom.

Well, it's not like I cared. All I cared about was seeing Jacob on our secret meadow. We had been meeting there every chance we got. Which meant every chance my dad wasn't paying close attention. It really sucked to have a mind reading father.

Today we were meeting in the meadow at noon. It was a quarter before and I was already on my way. It wasn't particularly far. I had just snuck out early so that I wouldn't be caught.

I was almost reaching our meeting spot and my heart accelerated in anticipation. If that was possible. I really wanted to see Jacob. I mean, I had seen him last night. My parents did let him visit me. It was also very convenient he was my mom's best friend, as weird as that is. That meant we could get to see each other as much as we wanted.

But enough was enough. We never got some alone time. We weren't allowed to be locked up in my room. On every single date we had one of my aunts and uncles—if I was lucky enough for it not to be my dad—mysteriously appeared and stayed to watch over us. It was all very annoying.

So we started seeing each other in private. Having secret meetings whenever my parents let their guards down. I know it's not easy to fool a vampire. Especially a mind reading one like Dad but I managed. It was quite easy now. All I had to do was not think about the incredible times Jake and I had in private. About the way his bare skin looked like in the moonlight or in the sun. The softness of his touch, his long hair teasing and tickling my skin wherever it made contact…

Whoa! Got a little carried away. Something I could never do in my dad's presence. Jake learned how to rein his thoughts in as well. He had a tough time at first. It had taken a few punches and threats of castration from my dad to finally get it down but he did.

I walked through the forest at a brisk pace, making no sound as I moved along. My nerves felt on edge and my stomach was full of butterflies. It was amazing how Jake could make me feel. I slowed down as I saw a pinpoint of light signaling that I was close to the meadow and the warm sunlight.

The light got bigger as it got closer and I could already see a patch of green grass and several wildflowers. I walked through the break in the trees and into the direct sunlight. My skin instantly emitted a dull glow. Sure I didn't sparkle like the rest of them but Jake liked it that way. Said it made me look less creepy.

I started walking up a small hill knowing that when I reached the top the man of my dreams would be waiting for me. The sun felt good on my body. I felt like it energized me. With every step I took I walked faster. I couldn't wait to be in his arms again.

Then I saw it.

I stopped instantly and just stared. My advanced mind was trying to comprehend the sight before me. It was still a few steps to the top of the hill but there was a pale round object, sparkling, sprouting from the ground.

No, wait. It wasn't sprouting from the ground. It was in the sky. It was very similar to…the moon.

It was the moon!

My life was an unending, unchanging midday. For me, being half-vampire, half-human, midday was a necessity. So how was it possible that the moon was rising, in the middle of my midday?

I was dumbfounded. Rooted to the spot for various seconds. Slowly, my limbs started to regain motion and I kept walking to the top of the hill. My eyes never left the fascinating, and impossibly there, white orb.

The moon however started to distort as I got closer. It lost its roundness. It became more heart-shaped. That wasn't right.

I vaguely felt the wind pick up and send strands of curly bronze hair across my face. The image never wavered. It was frozen. It was impossible.

Then, it moved.

The peculiarly shaped moon slightly jiggled, for lack of a better word. I heard a low chuckle escape my lips. As strange as this situation was, the moon jiggling reminded me of someone shaking their butt.

Weird.

I finished ascending the hill and screamed as loud as my lungs would let me.

So I definitely wasn't seeing the moon. Well, not the bright star that lights up at night. Because I was definitely seeing a moon of a much different kind.

My scream made the person that was bending over, mooning me, turn around hastily. If the first time I had screamed loudly, this time I positively screeched. Like a crazed banshee.

"Ewww. Daddy put it away!" I said while I closed my eyes tightly shut.

"I'm sorry," my Dad responded with obvious embarrassment in his voice.

I was glad of his embarrassment. He ought to be ashamed of himself. Providing his daughter with a full view of his rear and junk. Like I needed to be scarred for life? I don't think so.

I opened my eyes hesitantly and was glad to see his pants were securely in place.

"What are you doing here?" I demanded.

"I'm waiting for your mother. This was our personal meadow ever since I decided it was better to do her than eat her. I thought we could enjoy the sun together."

"Ok, that makes sense, but what were you doing without pants? I'll probably need therapy for, like, the rest of my existence."

"I was…enjoying the breeze?" He asked awkwardly.

At that moment, a russet wolf emerged from the vegetation and quickly phased back into the most beautiful man in existence.

Jacob "Sex Master" Black. Boy, how did that man make me howl…

"Jacob! What's the meaning of this? Put on some clothes. Can't you see my daughter is present?" My Dad's voice interrupted my wild fantasies.

"After what I just saw, I need some distraction to get my mind off Eddie jr. and Jake is a very BIG help."

I ran across the meadow and jumped into Jake's awaiting arms. I pressed myself close to his very naked body.

"Nessie. Come back here. Jacob's thoughts are hardly pure right now and as you're father I must protect your virtue!" Daddy screamed.

I reluctantly let go of Jake and turned to face my dad.

"Aw, how sweet. You think I still have virtue to protect," I said and smiled tenderly at him.

I watched as his furious face turned into one of pure horror as he probably confirmed what I just revealed with Jake's and my thoughts. The poor vamp was left speechless.

I was getting kinda scared of his reaction. He still wasn't moving.

Then, miraculously, my mother stepped out into the meadow and placed a hand on Dad's shoulder. He jumped slightly at the contact but continued to stare at Jake and me.

"Edward, what's the matter?" My mom looked from her husband to the both of us standing at the far edge of the meadow. "Jake, do you like being naked? Put on some clothes please. I didn't want to see it in Eclipse. I'm not gonna see it now."

Jake let out a barking laugh while I stared at him now.

"What does she mean she didn't want to see it before? You wanted to flash my mom?" I whispered murderously to him.

"What? She's just joking Nessie. You're my imprintee. I love you. I was created to be with you. It's what imprinting is all about," he whispered into my ear.

He was lucky that I loved him so much. And that my dad chose that precise moment to regain his voice.

"Bella, your daughter just told me she has no virtue to protect. What did we do wrong when we raised her?"

"Don't worry about it, Edward. It's in her genes. She inherited my skankyness. There's nothing we can do about that. Alice and Rose's tutelage doesn't really help either. I knew sending her to those stripping pole classes with them was a mistake." She shook her head in disappointment.

"Stripping…pole…classes?" Daddy stared wide-eyed at my mom, asking for an explanation.

As if she could give him one.

"Come, Edward. Let's go home and leave the kids be." Mom placed her hands on his shoulders and pulled slightly, forcing him to move.

They only got a couple of steps before he gave resistance.

"Bella! This is our meadow. It has always been ours. Why do we have to leave? They are the ones who should be home," he fumed.

"Sure thing, Edward. We'll get out of here," the love of my life accepted and sent a wink in my direction.

Hmmm. It seemed like he had a plan and I was so ready to find out. Hopefully it would involve the same amount of clothing he had on at this moment.

"Jacob, you aren't going anywhere with my daughter. If you value your future generations you will not touch her until the wedding. Which, if I get my way, won't be for a very long time." Daddy roared.

"I don't want to have kids with Jake, Dad. I mean I'm half vampire and he's a werewolf. Our kids would end up looking like fish. Hello? Did you see Underworld?"

"I'm just going to take her home, Edward," Jake said with his hands held up.

Without waiting for my dad's response, he phased and lay down on the floor so I could climb up on his back. He rose to his feet and sped away into the surrounding trees.

It was exhilarating, the speed. I loved the raw power that seemed to emanate from him when he was in wolf form. It was such a turn on. I'm sure he meant to take me safely home and then leave. But I would have none of that. Once we were home I could convince him otherwise. It was lucky that there would be no one at the cottage. Quite convenient.

Mwahahaha. Naughty Nessie. But with that sexy werewolf of hers, who wouldn't be? Review!