I do not own NARUTO (:
Ages: 19/20/21
Neji was developing a throbbing migraine. Hiashi's words were like a drill. Boring in to his brain, drilling holes in his skull.
"… So in conclusion Neji, our clan Elders have decided that Hyuuga Hiroko would be your best candidate."
A strange gut jerking sensation followed these words. Neji stared again at the portrait of the woman. She was pretty he supposed. Long brown hair, and dark lavender eyes, unusual for a Hyuuga. But she was a blank. A piece which did not exist in Neji's life.
Hiashi was watching Neji's expression anxiously. Obviously he had gotten rid of all the candidates who he knew Neji would hate.
"Why her again?"
"Her Byakugan is the most advanced. Of all the females in our Branch she is the most powerful."
"The Main Branch?" That had Neji's attention.
Hiashi glanced towards the door. Neji did not fail to notice it. Checking for an exit, if things get nasty.
"Well… If you two were to have children, they would not be branded. This means they would grow up without a limit to their power, and given your strength, they would indeed be, brilliant successors if Hinata and Hanabi have no children."
Neji could feel a rage, like molten lava building up inside of him.
"To improve the Hyuuga House's reputation? Improve their image? To even out the two mistakes you produced?" Neji had not meant to say it. He had not meant to insult Hinata and Hanabi so bitterly.
He knew the pain would come before he had a chance to apologize.
His vision blurred. He fell sideways from his kneeling position, clutching his head, wanting it to end, wanting to not exist. The pain seared across his forehead. He was powerless, all his dignity and composure stripped from him. It was like ripping a band aid of, removing the top layer of skin, and what lay underneath was never pretty.
The pain subsided.
"Do not, ever, ever talk about my daughters like that Hyuuga Neji. You have no choice anymore. The matter is settled. Hyuuga Hiroko will meet you soon enough, I will be able to give you the date and time tomorrow. Remove yourself from my presence. Now."
Neji peeled himself from the unforgiving floorboards.
'Damn it.' His composure had slipped. His anger had surfaced. He had revealed himself, and had been rejected. He had said no, and he had been ignored.
Neji headed toward where his bedroom was situated, weaving through the maze of corridors. Once there, he went to bathroom, and washed his face. He scrubbed his forehead ruthlessly, a subconscious act, as though he wanted to remove the damned seal which stripped him of everything he had worked to hard to attain.
…
Shikamaru was playing a game of Shougi with himself. The last time he had done this, was when he had come up with the plan to kill Kakuzu and Hidan.
He rubbed his forehead in frustration. This was not supposed to happen to him. All because of some stupid emotion that refused to go away. Shikamaru shook his head, as though trying to shake a memory from his mind.
'Just forget about him. Forget about the damned bastard. Focus on this game.'
"Trying to forget someone you love, is like trying to forget someone you never met, you know."
Shikamaru started.
"Chouji, what the hell, are you trying to kill me?"
"You would have noticed me if you hadn't been so preoccupied." Then an evil grin stretched across Chouji's face. "So you do love him?"
"I don't. It's just some troublesome hormones acting up."
Chouji surveyed Shikamaru, unconvinced. Then, "We were going to have a barbecue Shikamaru, all of us, Gaara's come to visit, Naruto's idea. Do you want to come?"
Shikamaru considered the possibility. On the one hand he's see that damn bastard there, but on the other hand, he needed some distraction. And it wasn't like there wouldn't be other people there to provide the distraction he needed.
"Yeah, why not."
"Good, it's gonna be at Ino's, five o'clock, see you there." Chouji strolled down the path, then stopped and yelled "Bring FOOD, Shikamaru!" and then he was gone.
Shikamaru growled in anger. Now he had to go to his parents and ask his mum to cook something.
With a bitter 'troublesome' Shikamaru moved to tidy away his Shougi board, and, as he left he gazed up at the sky. The clouds were less comforting today.
…
"Naruto… Put it down." Neji did not even look up from his paperwork.
"Ah, sorry."
This was Hinata's fault. If she had just told Naruto Neji was out he would be fine, but Hinata, always wanting to help her Naruto led the blond straight to Neji's room. Now Naruto picked things up, prodded scrolls only to yell in surprise when a shower of needles headed his way.
"Anyway, as I was saying, would you like to come?"
Neji rubbed his temples before looking over at Naruto.
"Why should I?" Hurt flickered in Naruto's eyes for a moment but then he grinned.
"Because we want you to be there."
"Why?" This question startled Naruto somewhat.
"Uhh… Well you're a good guy. It would be awesome to have you there." A peculiar emotion twisted it's way across Neji's face, but then it was gone.
"What time is it?" This was as good as a grateful yes from Neji.
"Five." Neji considered.
"I will try to be there on time."
"Great." Naruto's usual grin was back in place.
"See you there." Naruto made to leave but stopped suddenly, attention caught by something.
"If it's a scroll I would leave it Naruto, they're Ten-Ten's creation, poison. Best not to touch."
"Is this your mum and dad?" Neji's head snapped up.
Naruto was holding a picture, very gently as though cradling a baby.
The photo was faded, old, in it there stood a man, all angles and planes of ivory skin, proud, arm around a pretty young woman with long curly brown hair. Her eyes were Neji's eyes exactly. Long lashes, big doe's eyes. In her arms, she held a bundle of blue cloth. At one end of it could be seen a small hand and a tuft of brown hair.
"Yes."
"Wow." Naruto stared longingly at the photo.
He shook his head.
"They must be pretty proud of you, wherever they are."
Neji was not sure what to say to this. Instead he remained silent.
"Well, I better be off Neji, I'll see you at Ino's place alright? Later."
The Uzumaki left the room, leaving a peculiar mixture of feelings, which had rippled through Neji at the sight of the photo. He had thought he had lost his parent's photograph, yet here it was again, a miracle, he had searched weeks for it, even going so far as to activate his Byakugan in search of it. And then one loud mouth blonde march in to his room, prying through his belongings and found it. Once again Naruto had changed Neji's view of things.
…
"How long do we still have Chouji?"
A shifting from his left side told Shikamaru Chouji was checking his watch.
"We still have thirty-seven minutes."
"Good."
"Chouji…"
"Hmm?"
"What does love feel like? You know… When you see Ino and when she sees you… What's it like?"
Chouji gazed down in concern at his friend. Shikamaru was never usually so philosophical about things. And then he realized. Shikamaru had lied. Shikamaru's attraction towards Neji hadn't just developed over the last few months. It must have been going on for a while. But over the last few months Shikamaru had probably realized what he felt.
"It feels like that strange feeling… Well… I don't know. It feels like a lot of things. Depends on the situation I guess. I suppose it's when you care more if someone else lives than you do about yourself."
"That's a pretty suicidal feeling."
Chouji laughed.
"No. It's just when you want to protect them."
Silence stretched comfortably between the two.
"Time's up."
"Right." Shikamaru peeled himself from the ground. Then a thought struck him.
"Chouji?"
"Yeah?"
"Why did you tell Ino you loved her?"
Chouji considered.
"Because I was scared someone else would before I had the chance to."
…
Neji was so far away. He was there in the physical, but… vacant in expression. He ate and drank as though not really aware of doing so. Gaara and Naruto were busy trying drink as much as alcohol as was possible. And the rest never noticed. Lee sometimes threw an anxious glance in Neji's direction, hoping to catch the Hyuuga's eye.
Always failing.
Shikamaru stood.
"Neji."
Mercury eyes, so much like the clouds and the sky met his gaze.
"Yes?"
"Would you like to go for a walk?"
Neji considered. He looked around. Nobody was paying any attention to them, except Lee, who gave Neji a small encouraging smile.
"Okay."
He stood gracefully, tucked a strand of hair behind his ear, and walked in the direction towards the forest.
"What's the matter Neji?"
"I'm sure, I have no idea what you're talking about."
"You know what I'm talking about, what's with the weird attitude, you're more withdrawn than usual, what's happened?"
"Nothing."
"Tell me the truth. What's happened?"
"Nothing."
"Then why the attitude, something must have happened." Get him angry and he'll snap.
"Nothing."
"What happened?"
Neji twisted to face Shikamaru.
"It's not what's happened, it's what's going to happen, in six months! Happy?"
Shikamaru was quiet for a moment, giving Neji time to breath and collect himself, and his thoughts.
"What's going to happen?"
"Marriage. At twenty-one. Father at twenty-two. It's all decided for me. Never a fucking choice with me."
The swear word gave Shikamaru some indication of how bitter Neji was, but he didn't really register it. Neji… Married. Neji taken away from him. From everyone. A horrible emotion raised its head. Loss. He hadn't felt like this since Asuma had died. Loss. Bitter. It opened up old wounds, brought back old memories, opened up a hole in his chest, left him vulnerable.
"Neji…"
Shikamaru had not meant to say it. But it felt good, like an antidote for the feeling of having a black hole in his stomach.
Neji shot Shikamaru a questioning look.
"Yes?"
Shikamaru wished he hadn't looked over afterwards. But he did. He looked over at Neji. And Neji looked so open. So exposed. The ghost of a child stared through the silvery eyes, completely unspoiled by shit like Main and Branch, and seal or no seal.
And then Shikamaru did something stupid. He made Neji stop walking, and he guided the Hyuuga in to an alley, and then he kissed him.
It was weird and electrifying, like falling from a considerable height, or waking up from a nightmare.
Feels like flying...' Neji's thoughts were a mixed jumble of words. Completely illogical.
And when it was over Neji did not push Shikamaru away. Instead he remained completely still, like a deer caught in headlights, waiting for reality of what they had done to come crashing into the pair of them.
AN: I'm sorry if there are any grammatical errors... I swear grammatical is not a word. But please try to ignore them, I am half asleep at the moment . Constructive criticism is appreciated.