Agony
As Maura died in my arms I had never felt any worse. She was my best friend and seeing her take a bullet for me and watch her bleed to death was heartbreaking. Tears burned my eyes and a few fell down my face. I held Maura's dead body to mine as if I were keeping her warm. I bit on my lip hard to keep from sobbing and I started tasting blood.
"Maur, you can't die on me. I need your funny ways, your no-lies speeches, and your killer fashion. Most of all… I need you by my side!" I confessed to her limp body. By the time Korsak had arrived with the bus she was long dead. He saw me crying like I was after my first Hoyt encounter, and tried to pull me away from Maura. I thrashed against his grip.
"No! Don't take me away from her!" I screamed at him like a child. When he and Frost pulled me away I reached for my side-arm and held the barrel to my heart. Both of my partners wrestled my gun away and hid it. For days I cried I never did anything because I did that with Maura. I didn't go to work, I didn't sleep, and I rarely ate. Ma said I should go see a counselor but I never did. I felt that no one could understand my depression and I felt like I wasn't on Earth. I loved Maura and now she's gone! Why does this happen to me?! When I was somewhat gathered I decided to go see Maura for one last time. I walked to the precinct and Ma saw me. She jogged over to me and wrapped me in a crushing hug.
"I'm so sorry Janie," she whispered, on the verge of tears.
"I miss her Ma, I loved her," I choked out. Ma's grip tightened on me.
"I know you did, we all did," she sobbed softly. I started to rub her back as she'd done for me when I was a child.
"Ma, I'm gonna see her one last time. I know they held off on the autopsy so that everyone can see her," I told her. She nodded and released me from her death-grip. I walked out the café doors and to the elevators. Hesitantly I pressed in the down arrow. When the doors opened I walked in and leaned up against the wall. When the doors closed I pushed the floor that had the morgue. Memories of us flashed before my eyes.
Maura had reentered the guest bedroom from the surprise visit from Agent Dean and lay next to me. Her arm was rubbing mine.
"Is this a sleepover or is this your way of telling me you're attracted to me?" She laughed and smiled at me. I smiled back but I already knew the answer: sleepover. Just then her turtle, tortoise, whatever, started bumping around and I shot bolt upright.
"It's okay, it's just Bass. It's oaky," she said while comforting me and pushing me back to the bed.
Tears started rolling down my face as more happy memories of us progressed. I shook myself from the sorrow and wiped the tears away. The elevator opened and I went into the morgue where Dr. Pike was about to start her autopsy.
"Hey! What the hell are you doing?" I screamed. He dropped the scalpel and I rushed over to Maura's pale lifeless body on the cold slab.
"Detective Rizzoli, you have no clearance to be down here," he said.
"Fuck you Pike! I don't give a damn about what the hell the rules say! Since I'm off duty is Miss Rizzoli," I snapped. "Go the fuck away! I wanna talk to Maura. And don't you dare rearrange her office or I'll rearrange your face!" Pike surrendered and walked away, leaving me with Maura. I brushed some hair out of her face.
"Hey Maur, I thought I'd come see you again before Pike cuts you open. Remember when we fantasized about what type of woman we would like if we liked women? I only saw you," I confessed. I felt more tears fall and one fell on her cheek.
"If I could, I would do your autopsy. But I can't… fucking Dr. Pike does! Before I completely lose it I'd better go work your case. Love you Maura," I said sadly. Pike entered the room again and I grabbed the collar of his scrubs.
"Check for signs of sexual assault first. I have a feeling she was raped. Don't miss a single thing or I will personally make sure you miss three things," I threatened, letting him go.
"Y-yes ma'am Miss Riz-"
"Detective again," I corrected
"Detective Rizzoli. Maura left a note on her desk for you."
"You never address her as Maura. You call her Miss Isles or Doctor Isles, never Maura," I seethed at him. I stormed out and into Maura's office and saw the neatly folded piece of paper. I opened the paper and began reading.
Jane,
I've always loved you, but… well there is no "but"! I love you! I see you came to see me since you're reading this, but check the table again.
-M
P.S: You were all I saw too 3
I reread the note four times and glanced at the body five. I saw that the handwriting is Maura's and the body wasn't! Who is this doppelganger of Maura's? I then remembered Hope, Maura's mother. They look a lot alike so it could be Doctor Hope Martin.
?
"Our dead Maura isn't Maura. She's a Jane Doe now," Jane announced as she entered the squad room. Frost jumped at the sound of her scratchy voice.
"The hell you doing here Jane?" Korsak asked.
"Uh working the case, what else?" Jane replied like the smart-ass she is. He shot a skeptical look Jane's way.
"I also wanna catch the bastard too okay?" she confessed. Korsak smiled at her and nodded. As soon as Jane sat down her phone rang.
"Rizzoli," she said into the receiver.
"There is bruising and tearing of the cervix," Pike said.
"What about fluids?" Jane asked.
"Should I run a rape kit? It could've just been rough intercourse gone wrong."
"Yes, run a fucking rape kit! And send us prints or run them there. I want to find out who this Jane Doe is." With that she slammed the phone down, flipping the note in her hands a couple times.
"Hey Korsak, can you see if Maura's prints are on this?" she asked Vince shyly. He nodded and took it to the laser print scanner. Of course Jane's prints came up; she'd been holding it for a while. But what was surprising was that Maura's were there too.
"Jane," Frost started.
"The ink was still wet when I read the note. She's alive!" Jane cheered, happy tears falling down her face.
"Don't get your hopes too high Jane. It'll be all the more saddening when you find out she's dead," Korsak advised. Just then Jane's phone vibrated with a text.
You're smart Jane, don't give up on me. I need you to find me!
-M
Jane sighed heavily and closed her phone, and made a silent vow to Maura that she wouldn't stop until she found her.