A/N - Ok, so I know I should probably be working on my series, but I saw people wandering round canvassing the other day, and this idea just popped into my head so I just had to write it. I decided to write this in the first person, not sure why. The story jumps between past and present tense because it is supposed to be as if Remus is in the present, recalling a past event, just in case that confuses anyone.
Disclaimer – Alas, anything you recognise is not mine.
Persuading Remus Lupin
It was just as I sat down with a well-earned cup of tea that the doorbell rang.
Of course it would have to ring then. Those people always manage to call at the worst time possible.
It was the beginning of October; they were starting early this year. Election time was coming up. Nobby Leach, the old Minister for Magic, was retiring and for weeks dedicated campaigners would be canvassing their local areas in the hope of winning a few more wizarding votes for their leader of choice.
This untimely caller was the first I had encountered, an occurrence I wasn't too surprised about considering the less than friendly neighbourhood I resided in.
As a werewolf I didn't have many options open for me, partially because not many landlords welcomed a werewolf into their space, but also because not many employers did either. To say I wasn't well off in the money department would be a slight understatement.
As a werewolf I didn't have many options to vote either, being a dangerous dark creature and all. Nevertheless, it was with a polite expression on my face that I answered the front door, intending to courteously excuse myself and ask whichever gormless idiot had been sent to my door to, kindly, fuck off. After all, they must have had some guts coming to my neighbourhood, and I doubt they would have met a friendly face so far.
As I opened the front door, peeling off some of the flaking paint around the handle in the process, I steeled myself for the pushy sales pitch to come. However no amount of preparation could have readied me for the man standing on my doorstep, smiling winningly and holding up a camera with which he caught my surprised expression with an exclamation of "Say 'cheese'!"
Needless to say I did not say cheese.
Nor however did I turn him away, as I had originally planned. You see, once I got over the shock of having a camera thrust in my face and once the blind spots that covered my vision from the flash receded, I actually saw the man in front of me properly and, well, I don't think anyone could have turned such a man away. Silky black hair hung just above broad shoulders which, had they attempted to get through something as narrow as my dilapidated front door, would have been having some trouble.
"Hi." he said, offering his hand which I hesitantly shook. "My name is Sirius Black and I was wondering if I could take up a bit of your time."
I was surprised to see that the welcoming smile the man had worn since the beginning of our encounter actually reached his storm grey eyes. It was as if he was genuinely pleased to meet me.
"Remus Lupin." I replied shortly, hoping that I hadn't been completely obvious in my appraisal of the man. That hope was immediately dashed by the knowing smirk on Sirius Black's face which told me I had been caught.
"I'm afraid, Mr Black, that I don't have much time to stay and talk," I started, hoping to extricate myself from the situation before it became anymore uncomfortable.
"I'll only be a minute." He cheerfully interrupted me. "And please, call me Sirius. Mr Black was my father, and I am most certainly not him."
I returned this comment with a confused smile and politely enquired as to why he was at my doorstep. I have always tried to cultivate an image of a mild-mannered, slightly old-fashioned young man with little talent, ambition or power. Of course none of this could possible be further from the truth. Well, apart from the old-fashioned part perhaps. I am the first person to admit my eccentricities, an over fondness for tea, old books and elbow patches to name a few.
"I am here to ask you to vote for Millicent Bagnold for Minister for Magic." Sirius told me with a winning smile and a definite glace up and down my person in what could only be described as a blatant checking out. Even I hadn't been that obvious.
"And why," I solicited with a slight smirk, enjoying the first company I'd had outside work for a week "should I vote for Millicent Bagnold?"
"Because I asked you to?" he hazarded with a roguish grin (did I just think the word roguish?)
"No, I'm afraid that would do little to affect my decision." I laughed.
"Would it help if I asked with a pretty please?" Sirius enquired, flicking a questioning glance in my direction. I pondered the idea briefly and was ashamed to admit it probably would. He was very pretty.
"No." I replied, however. "You'll have to do better than that." Sirius then launched into an obviously pre-prepared speech about the brilliance of Miss Bagnold, and what a magnificent Minister for Magic she would make.
I tuned out about halfway through the speech, more interested in the way Sirius' lips moved than in the words they formed. The irony of the fact that, not only am I a werewolf, but I am also gay is not lost on me. I supposed the only way my life could be more difficult is if I was a muggleborn, considering the current climate what with the war going on, and perhaps if I were missing a vital limb. Anyway, I digress.
My rapidly cooling cup of tea was preying on my mind, and so, when Sirius finished his speech on Millicent Bagnold, I decided to excuse myself. Good-looking man or not, no-one comes between me and my cup of tea after a long day of work.
"As persuasive as your argument was," I tell Sirius "it was so unimaginative and obviously learned off by heart that I'm afraid it has failed to sway me in my choice of Minister for Magic." I would have laughed at the crestfallen expression on Sirius' face had I not found it so ridiculously cute and endearing. Of course I didn't say this out loud.
Instead I told him "However, if you can think of an original argument you can always come back tomorrow and try to persuade me again." I hadn't meant for my proposition to come out in such a sultry tone, I didn't usually go for men who I met on my front doorstep. Most of my recent associations hadn't even involved the exchanging of names. And after all, it wasn't a serious suggestion I was making.
I would have had to have been blind and a fool, however, not to notice the light that sparked in the other man's eyes at my tone, the subtle way his body shifted closer to my own. And as I was neither blind nor a fool it wasn't difficult to realise that Sirius had also noticed my own body moving closer to his. For a moment neither of us spoke or moved, simply assessing the other with our eyes.
"Well, I really need to go." I excused myself, taking a step back from my door and the captivating man standing in front of it.
"Oh, yeah, sure." Sirius replied, looking slightly disorientated. I knew how he felt.
"Nice meeting you." I said before shutting the door and returning to sit on the settee and picking up my cup of tea. A quick warming charm brought it back up to an acceptable temperature and I couldn't hold back the sigh that fell from my lips as I inhaled the subtle scent of the earl grey and blue flower blend. I gazed around the room that served as my kitchen, living room and dining room and wished for the five-thousandth time in my life that I wasn't a werewolf.
It wasn't that I wanted a mansion or anything; I just would have appreciated a flat with more than three tiny rooms, only one of which didn't have a damp problem seemingly impervious to all magical spells.
As I drank my thoughts turned to Sirius Black.
He had definitely been flirting.
Or maybe I was just reading the signs wrong.
No, there was obvious interest there.
Definitely reading the signs wrong. Why would someone like that be interested in me?
Eventually I persuaded myself it was mere wishful thinking on my part. Being a werewolf didn't make for the best relationships either, especially not when you had to hide such a big part of yourself from day one.
There had been someone who knew, once. Someone who didn't care what I was. But he was gone, and I was alone.
Not that I was a bitter old man or anything, on the outside anyway. I knew I was one of the lucky ones. I had been allowed to go to school, allowed to be a wizard. I had friends, I had even found love.
But after he left I decided it was better to be on my own. It hurt less that way.
So I went out with friends, or rather acquaintances is perhaps the better word. Sometimes I went out alone, to a pub or a club where I could pick up a quick fuck and, for a few hours, feel like I was wanted again. And the beauty of it all was that in the morning we went our separate ways. Names were never exchanged, phone numbers or second meetings not even considered.
There should be a word for my kind of people; the ones who seek human companionship from the bottom of their soul but lack the ability to put their hearts on the line. As it is there is none, so I suppose the closest I can get is damned, condemned, or perhaps royally fucked up is the best form of description.
It was the part of me which drove my less than scrupulous nocturnal activities that wished Sirius would take me up on my joking offer and return the next day to persuade me further. However I knew there was no likelihood of that happening. It was sheer desperation and loneliness which allowed me to entertain those ridiculous fantasies.
You can imagine my surprise then, when, a little later than the first visit, I opened the door to find Sirius Black, camera in hand yet again, smiling and ordering me to "Say 'cheese'!"
"I have to ask," I said, rubbing my poor, light abused eyes "what makes you think having a camera shoved in my face and being nearly blinded is going to make me vote for Millicent bloody Bagnold."
"Ooh. Bit tetchy today are we?" he grinned. I shot him an irritated glare.
"Yes, as a matter of fact, I am."
"Tell aunty Sirius all about it."
"Not if you call yourself 'Aunty Sirius' I won't"
"Oh come on, I'll be a friendly auditor. I am a giant ear, aquiver for your tales of misery and woe."
I looked at him for a second as I tried to process what the hell he meant by that last sentence and then sighed.
"I got fired from my job yesterday. I was job hunting today."
"And it didn't go well?" he asked sympathetically.
"You could say that." I acknowledged with a wry smile. "I've always found getting employment rather difficult."
"I know the feeling mate. That's why I'm doing this."
"Oh, so you're not actually a supporter of Millicent Bagnold then?" I asked, laughing.
"No, I am." Sirius declared. "I do think that, out of all the candidates, she will make the best Minister for Magic."
"And is that why you're back?" I enquired. "Have you come up with a better argument for me?"
"Of course." Sirius said. "I never back down from a challenge."
"All right then, persuade me." I said, smiling slightly.
"Ok. There is something you should know about dear Millicent." Sirius began solemnly. "She is, in fact…a pure blood."
"And why would I care about that?" I asked, perhaps a little more sharply than I had intended. Sirius looked at me without expression for a moment, before his face broke into a soft smile.
"I was testing you," he said "to see if that sort of thing mattered to you. I'm glad it doesn't." he smiled. I relaxed slightly.
"But that is exactly why you should vote for Millicent Bagnold. " Sirius continued. "Because she doesn't care about that sort of thing either. She is a strong witch, both in power and in her opinions, and I think that she will genuinely make a difference in the equality of all witches and wizards."
"I'm assuming your not a pureblood then." I said, feeling myself liking the man on my doorstep even more as I heard his unbiased political views, although I couldn't help but wonder if that outlook would stretch to werewolves.
"No, I am a pureblood." Sirius said, his tone souring slightly along with his expression. I stared at him in surprise.
"But you're so liberal and- oh. Sirius Black. You're one of those Blacks?" I asked, only now noticing the facial features which should have obviously pointed to Sirius' aristocratic bloodline.
"Yes. I am one of those Blacks." He said bitterly.
"But don't let that change your view of me." He pleaded. "I swear I am nothing like them."
"I can see that." I assured him. "I'm the last person to judge someone on something they can't help, like which family they were born into." I smiled.
We talked for a while longer before Sirius said he had to be off to another road.
"Have I persuaded you yet?" he asked, just before he left.
I couldn't help myself, hoping to see him again, and answered "No, I'm afraid you still haven't."
Rather than looking disheartened Sirius grinned and said "No matter. I'll just have to come back tomorrow and change your mind." He waved and walked off down the street leaving me standing, outlined by the light flooding out of my apartment and hating myself for the hopeful feeling buried deep in my chest.
Sirius came every evening after that, each time snapping a photo of my various different expressions. On his fifth visit I invited him inside, saying
"If you're going to be forcing me to listen to you, I'd prefer it was done in the warmth where we can sit down as opposed to on my front doorstep."
On the ninth visit I let him stay over, sleeping on the narrow settee, as we had ended up talking so late, and drinking quite a bit. Neither of us thought it was a good idea for Sirius to be apparating in his intoxicated state.
After every visit Sirius asked me "Have a persuaded you yet?" and I always answered "No, I'm afraid you still haven't." It became our little ritual.
"I brought coffee." Sirius stood on my doorstep, carry-out cups in hand and a grin on his face.
"I'm really more of a tea man." I said as I let him in.
"This stuff is special." He replied, . "It's magic, literally. It's sort of like alcoholic coffee."
Sirius had been coming to my house pretty much every evening for over three weeks. I wasn't exactly sure why I allowed it to continue. The only word I could use to describe what we were becoming was friends, and I had decided two years ago I was better of without them. But I enjoyed Sirius' company, more than I wanted to admit to myself.
I shut the front door and turned to walk through the entrance which led to the main room but was prevented from doing so by Sirius' back, which I bumped right into.
"Sorry." He said, turning round swiftly and grabbing my arm to prevent me from falling over.
"What is it?" I asked, staring down at him in confusion.
"I just realised how empty your apartment is." He explained.
"Well excuse me for not having enough money to buy fancy furniture." I retorted angrily as I tried to push past him.
Sirius reached out to hold my other arm and explained "I don't mean furniture. I mean pictures. You don't have any pictures or things like that."
I looked over his shoulder into the other room and realised he was right.
"Yes, I suppose I don't." I shrugged. It was only then that I noticed how close we were standing, Sirius holding onto both of my arms and my back practically against the wall of the narrow hallway.
"Um, we should go and sit down." I suggested, looking at Sirius who was staring at me, slightly dazed.
"Yeah, we probably should." He agreed, picking up the coffee cups he had rested on the floor.
"So, tell me a bit about yourself Remus." Sirius said as he lounged on one side of the settee in a manner I had come to realise only Sirius Black could pull off.
"There is not much to tell really." I said, sitting myself down on the other side of the seat, carefully keeping a calculated distance between myself and Sirius.
"I grew up in Britain, moved to France when I was eleven, so I went to Beauxbatons. Moved back when I was eighteen."
"Wow." Sirius commented. "That summary of your life managed to spectacularly avoid telling me anything about you as a person. I must congratulate you on your incredible skills of evasion."
I made a face at him and replied "I think you'll find it wasn't evasion, merely summarisation." I leaned forward so that my knee was touching Sirius' and my face was mere inches away from his. "I'm afraid I have had a remarkably uninteresting life, Sirius."
Sirius leaned closer as well, eyes burning a dangerous ash colour. "I'm afraid I just don't believe that Remus."
I pulled back abruptly and sighed, running a hand through my greying hair distractedly.
"I don't really know what else you want to hear about."
"How about you star with your family?" Sirius suggested.
"Dead." I replied promptly. "My parents died when I was sixteen. I don't have any other family. Well, none that wish to see me anyway."
"I'm sorry." Sirius comforted. "If it helps I know quite a bit about family who don't want to see you." I looked over at the man beside me and realised I knew hardly anything about him. My view of him was completely one-dimensional. Simply that of the Sirius who came to my door, brought drinks to my house, supported Millicent Bagnold for Minister of Magic. I had no idea who he was when he wasn't with me. And what worried me the most was how much I wanted to know.
As I watched Sirius leave later that evening I caught sight of the shadow my body created on the ground in front of me, and for a second I could have sworn I saw it flicker, changing from the shape of the man that I tried to be to the wolf that I really was.
It was like a wake-up call to me. I realised I was in danger of actually feeling something for Sirius, a phenomenon I was anxious to avoid. I decided that if I was having physical feelings for the man the best way to deal with it would be to get those feelings out of my system, so, not ten minutes after Sirius had left, I was apparating out of my apartment into an empty alleyway outside one of the clubs I frequented. I hadn't really bothered doing anything to my appearance. Most people who went to these clubs often didn't care what their partner looked like, only how they could make them feel.
I nodded to the bouncer as I went in, he knew me well enough from my numerous visits. The sight that met me as I walked inside the club never failed to confuse me. Hundreds of bodies, dancing and writhing together in time with a repetitive dance beat. I could never decide if this was closer to heaven or hell. Perhaps a bit of both.
The air was thick with sweat and alcohol and lust. I always found it difficult to breath in these kinds of places. That's why I usually ended up outside in an alleyway with my conquest. It could be pretty cold, but at least that way I knew I wasn't going to asphyxiate and die halfway through getting a blowjob.
That evening I had been lucky. I had found a guy pretty quickly. Reasonably good-looking, extremely willing, didn't seem like the exchanging names type. Within fifteen minutes of entering the club I was outside again, pressing the guy up against a wall and kissing him as if my life depended on it. Just as the guy had knelt down and was helpfully making all thoughts of a certain grey eyed man vanish from my mind, someone called my name in shock from the entrance of the alleyway.
I looked up into the grey eyes I was trying to forget, staring at me with a mixture of surprise and anger. I looked back stubbornly. This is who I am. My gaze said. I can't change that. I can't let myself get hurt like I have been before. Sirius seemed to get the message, as he turned around and walked away without a backward glance. I came a minute later, the image of Sirius burned into my mind.
Sirius didn't come back the next day.
Or the day after that.
I knew it had been a bad idea bringing someone back to my apartment. Especially as I was allowing them the dominant role, something I usually took unless I was in a particularly angry mood. Then I usually preferred someone else to be the one in control. But I don't know what it was about some guys, when you let them in your house and let them be like that. Anyway, suffice it to say I wasn't particularly happy after, and I'm pretty sure the other guy looked worse than I did.
It had been around a week after I had last seen Sirius that I brought that guy home, and I found myself opening the door the next day to the shocked face of Sirius.
"It's not that bad." I said as I saw him taking in the bruises and the violent red mark on my neck where the guy had gotten a little too friendly with his teeth. "I assure you the other guy looks worse."
"Who did that to you?" Sirius asked, horrified, as he stepped into my apartment and I closed the door behind him. "And how can you say it's not that bad?"
"Don't know his name." I shrugged. "I did get him back, and it's not like it hasn't happened before."
"This has happened before?" Sirius exclaimed. "Why the hell do you put up with it?"
"Sometimes I feel like I deserve it." I say quietly. "If I'm going to fuck around with all those guys then it's not hard to guess I'll find a bad one, once or twice."
Sirius looked at me as if he had never seen me before. "And why do you fuck around with all those guys?"
"Because it's safer than being in a relationship."
"How the hell is getting beaten up safer?" Sirius asked incredulously.
"Maybe not physically safer," I amended "but at least I know I'll get out of it with my heart intact." Sirius' look of anger turned to one of understanding.
"Remus" he said softly "it doesn't have to be that way. Not everyone is out to hurt you."
"Not intentionally." I agreed. "But you often find they end up doing that anyway."
"I don't know what to say." Sirius admitted finally.
"There's not really anything you can say." I told him. "And even if there was, is it really your place to say it?" I asked as I turned away from Sirius, trying to ignore the guilty feeling which sprung up in my stomach at my words. I was still upset that Sirius had ignored me for days, and his absence had convinced me he had never thought of me as his friend, as I had thought of him.
"How can you say that?" a low voice, full of anger, demanded from behind me. I turned around just as Sirius grabbed me and pushed me against the wall, rage radiating from his body.
I stared defiantly into silver eyes and replied calmly "Well, you're not really in any position to tell me how to live me life. We haven't known each other that long, your not really my friend, your certainly not my boyfriend, so I don't think you have any right to pass judgement on my life." I inwardly cringed at the look of hurt and betrayal that flickered across his face.
"Well," Sirius said, releasing my shoulders and leaning back "I guess I know where I stand then. I had considered you my friend, but if that's the way you feel I'll stop coming round."
A feeling of panic rushed through me. I didn't want Sirius to stop coming round. I enjoyed his company too much. Unthinkingly I grabbed his arm to stop him leaving. He turned around with a surprised expression on his face.
"Remus," he said delicately "how much of what you just said was actually true?"
I looked down at the hole in my sock before replying "Nothing, really. I have always thought of you as my friend, and I like having you around…and I think you're really hot." I blurted out before I could stop myself. I felt a hand gently tipping my face upwards and was forced to meet Sirius' eye.
"I have a proposition for you." Sirius started. "It seems to me that what you want is a boyfriend, but without the title. In other words a fuck buddy." Sirius stated bluntly.
"Now, I can't quite believe I'm suggesting this, but I find you nice looking, you find me nice looking - I think it's always been pretty obvious we're attracted to each other - and if it would stop you going out and getting yourself into trouble with those kinds of guys, then I'd be happy to fill that position."
I stared at Sirius in shock. It was completely incomprehensible that he would suggest something like that. There was no way I could take him up on that offer.
Yet part of me wanted to. And it was that part of me which leant forward and desperately pressed my mouth against Sirius'. It was that part of me which, instead of backing away when I heard Sirius' moan as my tongue found his, pushed the other man up against the kitchen counter and kissed him further. It was that part of me which took control of the situation, pulling off my own then Sirius' shirt and guiding us through to my tiny bedroom, stumbling over the stacks of books which were lying around because I couldn't afford bookcases.
However it was a different part of me, one that I am exceedingly thankful I have otherwise I am convinced I would be a completely horrible person, which paused the first part of me and asked Sirius "Are you sure about this?"
"I'm standing half naked in your bedroom with a hard on like nothing I've ever had before, and you seem to be in a similar state, yet you're asking me if I want to continue." He queried. "I would have thought the answer was pretty obvious."
I didn't need further urging. I pulled his head towards mine and kissed him fiercely, hoping that, in the darkness of the room, he wouldn't notice my scars. And as I kissed him and he kissed me I realised this is what I had been missing. Though I had done a number of unspeakable things with various men I could hardly even remember the faces of, never once had I ever kissed them, or been kissed in return. Alright, I had kissed them, if kissing the act of pressing one's lips against another's, tongues tangling, breath passing from one mouth to another. But I had never really kissed any of them, kissed them and meant it. And this was what was most shocking to me as I kissed Sirius, as I felt him shiver when I skimmed my tongue across his lower lip, as I felt him bite mine gently in return; I was truly kissing Sirius, in a way I had kissed no-one for two years. And what's more, it didn't scare me in the slightest.
We broke apart, gasping for breath and staring at the other as if we had never seen them before. At some point during our frenzied attack on each other's mouths we had ended up with Sirius' back against the wall, my front pressed up against his. I pushed my hips against his and he moved his in return, my mouth sliding down his throat to suck gently at his pulse point. Suddenly Sirius flipped our positions so that I was now the one with my back against the wall. Sliding down my body, he flicked open the button on my jeans and, slowly, pulled down the zip. My breath caught as he took me into his mouth, just as slowly. I couldn't hold back a groan as I felt heat surround me.
Finally I pushed him away, panting, and simply said "Off." gesturing to his trousers. He grinned and hurried to comply and we fell onto the bed, clothes scattered across the floor.
All other thoughts were gone except that I needed to get closer to this man. I felt Sirius running his hands over a sizable bruise on my hip and winced slightly. Slowly, he leant over and kissed the bruise, before following it upward to the others littered over my body, finally coming to rest on the red mark along my neck. I sighed as he began to suck on the spot gently, in that one simple action replacing my painful memories of the mark with new ones I knew I would be smiling about when I remembered them tomorrow. After a few seconds I grew impatient however and grabbed Sirius round the waist, flipping him over so that he was underneath me.
"Who said you were going to be on top?" he asked, eyebrow raised.
I leant over and bit his shoulder gently, following the line of his neck, then jaw and finally reaching his lips.
"Because I really want to be, and you really want me to be too." I murmured against his lips and felt them tilt upwards in a smile.
"Persuade me." He said, and, as I bent to return his earlier favour, I did.
And so we carried on for the next week. Sirius would come by every night I couldn't remember being happier in the last few years. I never contemplated a deeper meaning in our actions, however, though after that first time I knew what we were doing wasn't like those guys at the clubs. If I had let myself look further into it I would have realised that it was starting to feel like I was I a relationship with Sirius.
"I have a surprise for you Remus." Sirius exclaimed as I opened my door and let him in the apartment. It was the day before the elections and Sirius had said he could only pay a quick visit before going off to a meeting with supporters of the potential Minister for Magic Millicent Bagnold.
"A surprise Sirius?" I asked, amused at his enthusiasm. It was something he had been trying to pass on to me to little effect.
"All the lovely photos I've taken of your ugly mug." He replied, smirking as he dropped a pile of photographs onto my dilapidated coffee table. Peering down at the pile I was surprised to find they were muggle photos, not wizarding as I had been expecting.
Every one was a picture of me, my different expressions framed by the doorway in which I stood. I took note of the shock in the first, smiling as I recollected our first encounter. The second showed surprise, I knew this was more to do with the fact that Sirius had come back, rather than the camera itself. I flicked through the pile, watching as my expression became more amused, then friendly, then in a picture he took only last week-
I stared down at the last picture in my lap.
I knew that appearance. I had other photographs of me wearing the exact same expression next to another man with a similar look on his face. The affection in my eyes was easy to see, even through the dead medium of a muggle photograph.
"So, I was wondering if you were actually going to vote for Millicent Bagnold or if this has been a massive waste of my time." Sirius was saying, not noticing my sudden realisation and the conclusion I had come to after it hit me.
"Not that I think seeing you is a massive waste of my time." Sirius grinned at me, moving to take the photographs back and putting them in his bag. "I always enjoy your company."
"I'm afraid Sirius I haven't been completely honest with you." I told him. He looked up sharply at the deadened tone of my voice.
"What do you mean?" he asked.
"Well," I replied "You have been coming here under the impression that I am able to vote for a Minister for Magic, but you see I am not."
"What on earth do you mean Remus?" I looked into those honest grey eyes and almost lost my nerve. But I knew I had to do it. I had learned the hard way that your heart is something that should be protected from others, never given freely.
"Werewolves aren't allowed to vote." I said quietly, staring down at the mug in my hands. I heard Sirius take a sharp breath in and get up off the settee. Only when he moved into my line of vision did I dare to look into his eyes, and what I saw there made my heart sink.
Shock, disbelief, revulsion, and as always, that underlying fear. Fear of what, I didn't know. Fear of me biting him, fear of my hurting him somehow? I was never sure. It wasn't like I could do anything when it wasn't a full moon. But if people understood that then there would probably be less anti-werewolf sentiments. Perhaps then we would be allowed to live life like normal human beings, which most of us were, except for one night a month.
"You can go." I told Sirius quietly, recognising that look for what it was. An end.
Sirius nodded dumbly, still shocked by my revelation, and turned towards the door. At the entrance he paused, opening his mouth as if he was about to say something. However no words came, and so he left. Just like everyone else in my short twenty years of life had.
And the saddest thing of all was that it was already too late. All my efforts had been for nothing. The damage was done. I could feel the deficiently repaired pieces of my heart crack and fall apart, just like before. Only this time I wasn't sure I could put them back together again.
It is just as I sit down with a well-earned cup of tea that the doorbell rings.
Of course it would have to ring now. He always manages to pick the worst time possible.
"Sorry Remus." Sirius says with an apologetic smile as he notices the cup of tea grasped firmly in my hand.
"What happened to your key?" I ask, stepping back to let Sirius in.
"Lost it." he replies happily. "And you know I can't use my wand because muggles live on this street too."
"Why you bought a muggle house I will never know."
"I didn't. It belonged to my uncle."
"Hey." I say, moving over to where Sirius is standing and sliding my arms around his waist. "I'm really glad you asked me out. And that you asked me to move in with you." Sirius smiles and places a gently kiss on my lips.
"I'm really glad you agreed, even if it did take some persuasion."
A/N – I have realised I like writing shorter series and oneshots more than longer series, which is funny because I prefer reading long series.
I hope everyone enjoyed the story. I have to say I am quite pleased with this. I think it might be my favourite thing I've ever written. #
I almost didn't add in the sex scene because, to be honest, I had no idea what I wanted to write for it. How would you have felt if I hadn't? Also, as readers, do you prefer long oneshots or shorter twoshots?
I would be amazingly happy if you would tell me what you thought of the story, so please review.