Okay I know this has been done before but not by me so read, enjoy, and tell me if I should give something to someone else.

DISCLAIMER: If I was Stephanie Meyers, I wouldn't be writing this here wishing I owned the characters, now would I?

50 Things the Cullens will do at Wal-Mart

Fill an entire shopping cart with only rash cream. CARLISLE

Make up nonsense products and ask employees if there are any in stock. CARLISLE

Fill your cart up as much as possible, and then try to use the express lane finally deciding you only want a candy bar that wasn't even in the cart. CARLISLE

Ask if you can test some super-glue before buying it, then walk around the store gluing random items to other items/customers/staff. CARLISLE

Try putting different pairs of women's panties on your head and walk around the store casually. CARLISLE

Try to pay for your normal Wal-Mart items in the Wal-Mart Subway/McDonalds. ESME

Shop in the stock room as if it were the actual store. ESME

Try returning something that isn't sold at Wal-Mart. ESME

Switch prices on expensive stuff and cheap stuff. ESME

When someone steps away from their cart to look at something, quickly make off with it without saying a word. ESME

Find the electric box, and shut down the electricity to the whole store! EDWARD

While no one's watching quickly switch the men's and women's signs on the doors of the rest room when people are in the restrooms. EDWARD

"Re-alphabetize" the CD's in Electronics. EDWARD

When the loud speaker come on collapse to the floor yelling about the voices. EDWARD

Leave cryptic messages on the typewriters. EDWARD

Thank people for coming to your wedding when they enter the store calling them all the same name. BELLA AND EDWARD

Make a trail of tomato sauce to the girls bathroom. BELLA

Get an empty book, and say it's a guest book. Force people to sign in. BELLA

Take a full set of guy's clothes and a full set of gal's clothes, then leave them lying somewhere. BELLA

Get a stuffed animals and go to the front of the store and begin stroking them lovingly and talking to them. BELLA

Set all the alarm clocks to go off at two minute intervals throughout the day. BELLA

Randomly throw things over into neighboring aisles. ALICE

Hide in the clothing rack and when people walk by give them advice. ("That's not your color." "Better get the smaller size." "Pick the pink one." etc.) ALICE

While walking around alone, pretend someone is with you and get into a very serious conversation. Exp: The person is breaking up with you and you begin crying. ALICE

Insist that the automatic doors are magical portals to other realms. ALICE

While walking through the clothing department, ask yourself loud enough for all to hear, "Who BUYS this shit, anyway?" ALICE

Run out of the Wal-Mart bank (yes, they have a Wood Forest National Bank) with some toy guns yelling "LETS GO LETS GO!" Proceed to hop in the back of the motorized Barbie Jeep and speed out of the store. ALICE AND JASPER

Ask to see a rifle in the sporting goods section and once handed it ask where the anti-depressants are. JASPER

Go to the fish section with a recipe book in hand and point out a fish to an employee and say "MMM...That one will do" JASPER

Use a bullhorn and occasionally say that there is free candy in aisle 12. JASPER

Take up an entire aisle in Toys by setting up a full scale battlefield with toys as soldiers. JASPER

Challenge other customers to duels with tubes of gift wrap. JASPER AND EMMETT

Race a display bike (preferably small and pink) down a busy aisle at maximum speed while yelling "No Brakes!" EMMETT

Go into the dressing room then after a few minutes complain that there is no toilet paper. EMMETT

Drive around the store on tricycles screaming "The British are coming" EMMETT

Try to purchase a lawnmower in the self check-out line. EMMETT

Play "Pimp My Ride" with one of the electronic wheelchair/shopping carts you can get at the entrance. Spray-paint the wheels/ mount a radio on the front/ sprinkle unnecessary amounts of glitter on it. EMMETT AND ROSALIE

In the makeup department, spray yourself with every perfume there is, then walk up to a boy who is with another girl and start flirting with him in that annoying, ditsy way. When the boy shows no interest, start hitting on the girl the exact same way. ROSALIE

Place condoms in random people's carts. ROSALIE

When someone asks if you need help, begin to cry and ask, "Why won't you people just leave me alone?" ROSALIE

Go to the checkout and buy a bar of candy. Repeat, going to the same cash register, until the clerk notices. ROSALIE

Tell someone that you will sue for false advertising, since they do not sell walls. ROSALIE

Leave small sacrifices or gifts in the hands of the mannequins and bow to them. FAMILY

Play Wal-Mart football and try to get people to join you. FAMILY

Play a full game of Texas Hold 'Em on a display table. Invite friends, smoke cigars, order a round of beers from Wal-Mart employees. BOYS

Two words: Marco Polo. FAMILY

Hold indoor shopping cart races. FAMILY

TP as much of the store as possible. FAMILY

Take a chair to Electronics, tune in all the TV's to Young & the Restless, and watch while sobbing loudly. GIRLS

With friends, form a line that leads to nothing. Act like you're all excited about something. See how many people who walk by will come stand in it, too. FAMILY

I know authors are always begging for review and it gets boring writing them, but they are great encouragement and they keep us writing the story. REVIEW! Please tell me if any job should belong to a different character!