Cartman woke up with a start and he felt that something just didn't feel right, he looked down and saw two lumps protruding from his chest.
"The fuck I have fucking boobs?" He said patting his chest.
"Meem!" He cried out in that voice of his.
"Yes my little poopykins?" His mom said popping her head in the door way.
"I have boobs," He whined.
"Yes sweetie, that's just a part of puberty now get ready for school you don't have to be late," His mom said before she turned to leave. Cartman's confusion grew stronger when he saw that his closet was all filled with girl clothes, he finally decided on a red jumper with a brown skirt. When he got to the bus stop what he saw shocked him, standing there were three girls that resembled his friends.
"Yeah it was so weird I just woke up and I was like this," The girl Stan said, she had black hair to her chin and her body was as straight as a ruler.
"I wonder why this is happening?" The girl Kyle said, Cartman laughed at her looks, she had red hair down to her waist and small boobs and a big giant ass!
"I always dreamt of this day," Kenny said, he had on his usual parka so Cartman couldn't see what he looked like.
"Wow you changed too," Stan said, his voice as pretty deep for a girl's.
"What does it fucking look like you stupid hippie?" Cartman snapped.
"I wonder if this is happening to everyone," Kyle said.
"Your voice makes my ears bleed worse than Bebe's does," Cartman said, Kyle's voice was high pitched enough to break glass or so it seemed. When the bus got there the boys were disappointed to see that no one else had changed.
"It always has to be us," Stan mumbled taking his usual seat in the back.
"Have a seat ladies," Ms. Garrison said when the four boys entered the class room. Cartman huffed and plopped down in his seat making the legs of the chair creek in the process.
"Ever think about calling Jenny, Erica?" Bebe asked with a laugh.
"Shut up ho," Cartman snapped. From the front of the class room Ms. Garrison rolled her eyes, she didn't understand why girls were such bitches to each other.
"You're so fat Erica and no one likes fat girls," Bebe said.
"Right guys?" She added turning to the rest of the class.
"Well I uh I kind of like big women," Butters said knocking his knuckles together, Cartman rolled his eyes, he just knew that Butters would be the one to say that.
"No one likes any of you girls, so you should just leave and move to a different town or something," Heidi said stiffly.
"This one is pretty cute," Clyde said putting his arm around Kyle causing him/her to blush horribly.
"Oh please, she is totally flat," Bebe said rolling her eyes, jealous that her boyfriend was hitting on another woman.
"Well, at least my breasts don't take up half my body!" Kyle snapped. Ms. Garrison was too busy trying to settle the boys down that she didn't pay attention to the girls, that's how it always went in her class.
"I started my period yesterday," Kenny lied playing into the whole girl thing.
"Oh my gosh, you just started your's? I started mine like two years ago," Rebecca said.
"I am flowing heavily," Kenny said ignoring her statement.
"No one wants to know that Kendra!" Wendy snapped. Cartman rolled his eyes, these hoes talked more than the guys did and they said more hurtful stuff but they never got in trouble, stupid hoes. Finally the bell rang to go to lunch.
"It's about damn time," Cartman said.
"Like you need any food fat…" Kyle started to say before Clyde ran up and grabbed his arm.
"You're sitting with me today," He said dragging him off. In the cafeteria Kenny was going around asking the other girls for tampons, Cartman was fighting with Bebe, Kyle was sitting by Clyde and Stan was sitting in a corner by himself. He groaned when he saw Tweek walking over to his table.
"All the other tables are full," He strained out shaking like he always does.
"You can sit here I don't care," Stan said in a bored voice, he felt really lonely without his friends.
"Gah thanks, I hate cafeterias, too much pressure man," Tweek said twitching wildly. Stan rolled his eyes, he didn't need this right now.
"Does Tweek like Stanna?" Wendy asked looking over at where Stan was sitting.
"Why would anyone like ruler girl?" Bebe asked.
"Shut up Bebe, she just has a really athletic body and she's my best friend if I was a boy I'd totally date her," Wendy said.
"Ha-ha you're a fucking fag dude," Cartman said pointing at Wendy and laughing.
"Shut up before I kick your ass!" Wendy screamed at him. Cartman gulped and shut up immediately remembering what happened that one time in the 4th grade.
Stan was relieved when lunch was finally over, he frowned slightly when he saw that Clyde was sitting in his seat next to Kyle.
"That's my seat," He said to Clyde.
"Let me sit here please, I need to get more than just one kiss from her," Clyde said pointing to Kyle.
"He, I mean she kissed you?" Stan asked. A big grin spread across Clyde's face and he nodded.
"Best kiss I ever had," He said.
"That's uh, nice," Stan said. He groaned when he saw that the only available seat was next to Tweek.
"Get the fuck out of my seat!" He screamed at Clyde pushing him. Clyde fell to the floor by Stan's desk and started crying.
"Stanna that seat is already taken go sit by Tweek," Ms. Garrison snapped. Stan glared at Clyde and went to go sit by the most annoying kid in the world.
"I am sick and tired of being a girl!" Stan screamed out when they got to Stark's Pond where they had planned to meet up after school.
"Me too man I am sick of hanging out with all these stupid hoes," Cartman said.
"Being a girl is fun," Kenny replied building with all the tampons he had collected. Stan started to ask Kyle what he thought about being a girl but he was too busy giggling and blushing over Clyde's letter to pay attention.
"This is serious, I think this whole girl thing might really be sucking Kyle in," Stan said.
"We have to do something I am not going to have fucking tits forever," Cartman said. With that he and Stan left to go find a cure for this madness.