For this prompt at comment_fic: MCU, Thor/Jane and/or Loki/Darcy, "My Norse god. Get your own!"


"Hey, Foster, have you read this?"

Jane glanced up from her monitor at him, and Tony gestured at the reproduction he'd opened on the holographic table. It was a thick toroid structure, shaded metallic blue and covered by a geometric, angular script in white and black and red. "We found it in that ship."

Jane went back to her data. "Did someone finally translate it?"

"Thor had a free minute."

"What's it say?"

"Well," Tony walked around the table, comparing the image in front of him with the equations on his tablet, "if I'm interpreting this correctly, it might be a plan for a faster-than-light drive."

Jane hopped up out of her chair and grabbed the tablet out of Tony's hands. After swiping through a handful of pages, she asked, "Do you think we could make it work?"

Tony bit his lip. "It'll be tricky. There's a lot of components we'd need to kludge together." He aimed for his most casual tone of voice. "We'd need some help. From, you know, a deity, or a demigod. Maybe, a Norse one-"

Jane lowered the tablet. "What kind of help."

"Nothing much. Seriously, it would only take a second."

Jane fixed Tony with a stinkeye he suspected she used on particularly dumb students. "What, exactly, do you need him for," she said.

Tony made a vague, all-encompassing gesture. "Well, I mean obviously he's good in a fight, and there's the whole plasma thing, and-" She arched a brow, and he jumped ahead to, "We'd need some blood."

She narrowed her eyes. "No."

"Just, like, a little, tiny," he held his thumb and index finger together, "eentsy bit. Maybe, a liter. Or two. Or ten."

"No."

"Look, how often do we get a chance to build a hyperdrive, and all we need is some blood from the Norse god we happen to have—"

"My Norse god." Jane planted a hand square into Tony's chest and shoved; he was so surprised that he actually fell a couple of steps back. "Get your own."

"I was just asking-"

"The answer's no."

"He'd regenerate it all in, a day, tops-"

Jane closed in on Tony, invading his personal space, and he kept backing up until he ran into the table and had to lean back over it. "No," she said. Her voice was low and dangerous and he could only attribute it to her spending too much time around Hill.

"Okay. Sure thing. I'll find someone else. I'm sure there's at least one more god lying around without a prior claim."

Jane made him wait for it. Eventually, she straightened, handed his tablet back to him, and returned to her computer.

Tony considered his notes. Well, Thor was real-surely some of the other ones were too?

"Has Thor ever mentioned any uncles? Cousins? Aunts?"

Jane ignored him.