"You—You have a son?"
"Yes," Megamind replied, nonplussed, "why is that so hard to believe?"
"But—You—!"
This was not a topic Roxanne expected to have with her extraterrestrial boyfriend at two in the morning on a Sunday. Never had it occurred to her that Megamind would have blood family—Minion, she knew, was more than family to both of them—but children? From Megamind? Impossible! He had to be joking!
"But you were a virgin when we first had—"
"I was. It was artificial insemination."
"But—how come I don't know about this!?"
Megamind shrugged and laid back against his mountain of pillows. "He's grown. Lives up in Canada. Doesn't look like me much besides my eyes and chin-He's got some pigment disorders, so he's not, ya know, entirely blue."
"Oh my god, Megamind!" Roxanne smacked him on the shoulder. "You don't just slide this into conversation!"
And he had, the bastard! After slow, sleepy lovemaking, they had laid in bed holding each other and whispering little nothings. Until, that is, Megamind casually mentioned he had a son.
How the bloody hell is that normal!?
"What?" He whined, looking honestly baffled by her outburst.
"Megamind! It's a big thing when you say you have a kid! A son!"
"He's not a kid, I already said that," he scowled. "He grew up abnormally fast, since he was—well, a test-tub baby, to put it simply. He's about twelve, but he's already in his mid twenties in physical years. Hasn't changed much since I saw him last spring… Haha, believe it or not, it was actually an accident! I wanted to see if I could reproduce with a human, but my genetic material reacted with my human female samples... I couldn't just let the egg die! So I threw in some science, and pop! His name's Max."
"Oh my god—Who was the female!?"
Megamind blinked owlishly. "Minion got it. I doubt I would know this woman personally."
"MINION KNOWS!?"
"Don't yell at me!"
"How much of y-Max, is like you?"
"Besides physically? Not a lot. He's got a human-sized head and brown hair. He understood the basics of my inventions as a little thing, but never really picked it up. His interests lie in art. You should see some of the paintings he's done!"
"MEGAMIND!"