Impotent by Luvscharlie
Draco strode into Weasleys' Wizard Wheezes demanding answers. He smashed his fist down on the counter, which in retrospect might have been unnecessarily dramatic as it did rather hurt. "I demand to know what you sold her!"
Ron and George crossed their arms over their chests simultaneously and leaned back against the wall grinning like ginger Cheshire cats.
"Did you hear that, Ronnie?" George asked. "He demands to know what we sold some poor, unidentified female unfortunate enough to keep company with the likes of him."
"I did hear that, George. I think you might inform Malfoy that we don't divulge what we sell to our paying customers. Not even to smug, pain-in-the-arse wizards who come into our shop demanding to know." Ron's smile mocked him, and if not for the fact that he was quite desperate, he would have turned around and left forthwith.
However, the fact remained that he was desperate.
"Look, I don't know what you sold Hermione, but the fact is that whatever she slipped me has made it so that I can't—well, you know."
"Get it up?" George supplied, making him blush a deep red.
"Can't imagine he had much to get up in the first place," Ron said to George.
"You know," George said, "we should show Hermione what it's like to be with real men."
"You wish," Draco said.
Charlie came out of the back room at that moment and added his two Knuts worth to the conversation. "Having some problems with getting your little soldier to stand at attention then, Malfoy?"
Draco's patience had reached its breaking point about two nights prior when his girlfriend had appeared in his office wearing practically nothing and he'd been unable to do anything about it.
"What makes you think Hermione bought something from us that's caused your problem?" Ron taunted. "Perhaps you're simply not man enough for her."
"So that's what the problem is." Draco hadn't seen Hermione standing in one of the aisles when he'd entered the shop. He had been too intent on demanding that they tell him what they'd done to him. He jumped when he heard her voice.
George and Ron both took a step back from the counter. Charlie grinned and shook his head. "Idiots. Haven't you learned not to mess with her yet? I'd hex them, Hermione, or, perhaps a really powerful Jelly Legs Jinx."
George put his hands up in surrender and handed over a vial of green liquid. "Here's the antidote. It was all in good fun, Hermione. We didn't know the potion we slipped him would render him completely unable to perform and—"
"Shut it, George." Hermione aimed her wand at his crotch. "All in good fun was it? We'll see how Alicia likes it when you can't perform in the bedroom." Hermione approached him and flicked her wand, but George was quicker than she had given him credit for. He pushed Ron in front of him, and Ron took the full brunt of the spell.
Draco leaned over him as Ron rolled around on the floor holding his bollocks and moaning. "Do enjoy your date with Lavender tomorrow night, Weasley. I've heard she's a sure thing, not that you'll have the chance to find out."
Draco took Hermione's hand and they Apparated away with the vial of antidote in hand before Ron had a chance to get to his wand and extract some revenge.
~Fin.~
A/N: Written for the Live Journal community dramionedrabble's Holiday movie Christmas challenge.