Whisper

By: Riley

Summary – There had to be a way to escape. A drabble of Josh's haunting thoughts.

It was a dark; darker than he had ever imagined possible. How was he to come to his senses as everyone wanted if things around here were always so dark? How was he supposed to push the voices and the dark thoughts aside if darkness continued to follow him?

Holding his arms around his knees, he continued to stare straight ahead, closing his eyes every few minutes to block out everything around him. It didn't work, but it was the best thing he could think of at such short notice. As far as he was concerned, there was to be no light around him anymore and so he allowed himself to stay in complete darkness. Unraveling his arms from his legs, he pushed himself up and stretched out, starting to walk the perimeter of the room.

His bed was as messy as it always had been, and though it was inviting, still holding a place of peaceful solitude he knew from when he was young and still afraid of monsters, he couldn't allow himself to lay down, to relax. If he relaxed it would be like he was giving up on what had happened.

"What are you waiting for?"

The whispered voice came from his head, it always had. He tried to ignore it. It wasn't really there. It was just his imagination, it was just his guilt. That's what Dr. Hill reminded him, want him to recognize. It was his guilt, though he had nothing to be guilty of. But that wasn't entirely true was it.

He only had one job to do and he didn't do it. He didn't expect things to end up so badly.

"You can do it."

It was the only solution, really. To make them feel as badly as he felt, to show them the pain that was to come to them for the actions they made. They didn't have to worry about it so much, they could just move on with time. It would be fine.

"You can do it."

The voices grew louder, swirling and whispering around him. He placed his palms against his ears and pressed as hard as he could. His head ached, his heart thumped, there was a ringing in his ears, and yet he could still hear the voices. They gave harsh whispers and laughs, taunting and teasing him yet sending fear through him with minimal effort. Just as they always did.

"You have to."

He shook his head, uttering a weak 'no' but he knew it was right. He had to do it. He had to make them hurt. And with that the voices and whispers slipped away until there was deafening silence around him.

And he smiled.