Kia ora! How are you all? Great, awesome, fantastic! Anyway, this is my first fanfiction for Saints Row and I really hope I did it justice. This fanfic is set in Saints Row 2 and it DOESN'T follow the missions, mainly because I haven't finished the game yet, but also because I wanted to focus on the Boss.

Now, this is set after Carlos dies and it surrounds the Boss trying to deal with her pain (in my story, they had been together for a year). I'm going to explain more things in flashbacks, so don't worry, you shall see the background of the Boss. I've tried to incorporate my own feelings into this as I too have lost someone I've loved dearly, and I know how it feels to want revenge.

So, please enjoy and feel free to give me some feedback on what I could do to improve it, or if there's anything you want added to the story.

AND, I still don't know if the Boss and Johnny are going to get together... I feel that they're better as friends, but we shall see.

ON WITH THE SHOW!

There was blood everywhere. It was splattered all over the ground, and it left a trail right to him.

He was whining, keening, trying not to make a sound but the noises came out on their own. He could feel pain everywhere, fuckin' everywhere. Heart was still beating though, still beating after all of this. Everyone had said he always had a good heart; he didn't think they could mean it literally.

The rain was pouring now, washing away some of the blood. He had always loved the rain, loving its calming sound and whole-heartedly believing that the rain had healing qualities. It was washing away his pain and he remembered what his mother had told him when he was little.

"Remember baby, when you're in pain, God is crying for you. His tears wash away your pain."

He hadn't always been religious, but when you grow up in a Catholic household you learn to believe whatever your mother tells you.

He tried praying, hoping it would ease his pain further. He couldn't speak, but he could still think.

"God, please take away this pain." He stopped and thought of what he really wanted. "Just let me see her again. Just one more time, I want to look at her face and I want to hear her voice."

And like that, he heard a scream.

"No! Oh shit, fuck, fuck, fuck!" She raced towards him, skidding on her knees next to him. She gently rolled him over so he was on his back. He couldn't help but let the screams go.

"It's okay, I'm here now. Please hold on... just fucking hold on!" She sprinted to the chain that was holding him to the truck and kicked it, hoping it would magically break apart, releasing him to her.

The tears started to flow down her face but she angrily brushed them off. Crying wasn't going to solve anything now.

Heart dropping, she walked over to him, taking in the whole sight. She could feel her stomach heave when she realised that the white on his face was his bone. There was an eye missing, but his other eye stared at her, pleading.

His torso was ripped to shreds, muscle and tendons were exposed. There was nothing left of the beautiful man that she loved.

"It's alright Carlos; I'm going to get help." She fumbled for her phone with cold, wet hands. The dial tone kept ringing and ringing. "Fuck!" She screamed at the screen, starting to panic.

She tried several numbers including Johnny's phone and Shaundi's. She knew she was getting desperate when she was ringing random rookie Saints.

Carlos' breathing was getting quicker as he started to panic; the pain was getting much worse now. He managed to get her attention and he held her gaze. Even with his missing eye he could take in her beauty. Her blond hair framed her blue eyes and perfect, angular features. Her eyes were red as she tried to hold back the angry tears.

Don't cry, Nena.

His eye dropped to the gun that was strapped to her thigh, its cold metal glinting in the moonlight. She followed his gaze, her eyes widening when she realised where he was looking.

"No, Carlos – NO!" She screamed the panic obvious in her voice. Her breathing increased rapidly, her chest heaving, lungs trying to grasp more oxygen.

Carlos weakly held up a hand and grabbed her arm. He tried with all his might to plead, but his voice wasn't working.

Please, Nena, I can't take this pain anymore.

The tears that were in eyes now spilled over her eyelids and onto her cheeks. She snorted hard, trying to stop her runny nose. It was so fucking cold, though... so fucking cold.

"But... B- But I love you." She whispered to him, as though that was reason enough to keep him alive.

I love you too, Nena. God knows I love you too.

Her shaking hand slowly made its way to the cold gun. She stared at it for a second, taking in the fact that this was going to end Carlos' life. This stupid, small pistol was going to end this wonderful man.

She grasped onto his hand tightly, holding on for dear life. Though it needed to be done, she couldn't do it.

"I can get help, Carlos. Someone will come and we can you to the hospital and then you can stay with me, where you belong." She whispered in a hurry, trying to convince the both of them.

Carlos gave a weak shake of his head, the pained whines still escaping his torn mouth. He tried to tell her telepathically that it was too late for him.

He managed to eventually whisper two words in a harsh growl, "love you."

She nodded at him, the tears flowing freely now. "I love you too Carlos."

She took aim at his head and pulled the trigger before she could second- guess herself.

The shot rang out as Carlos left the world.

"Where the fuck is she?!" Johnny asked, trying to concentrate on the road ahead of him.

Shaundi was desperately ringing every Saint she could find, asking where the Boss was. "I don't know, Johnny, no one can find her!"

Johnny ran a hand through his hair, trying to calm down. "Who have you asked?"

"Pierce, Tobias, Luke, Leah, Troy and Marcus," Shaundi rattled off the list.

"Have you tried Carlos?"

Shaundi nodded, "He was the first one I tried, but there was no answer."

"Fuck!" Johnny exclaimed as he swerved around a car that was blocking the road.

Shaundi was now starting to panic. Where the fuck could the Boss be? No one had seen her since that afternoon, and now no one knew where she was.

"Maybe she's just with Carlos, and she doesn't want to be disturbed?" Shaundi speculated, trying to convince herself.

"No, this isn't like the Boss," Johnny answered, "She would tell us where she was going."

Shaundi silently nodded, trying not to lose her head. All of a sudden, Shaundi jumped and screamed, pointing out the window, "There! She's over there, Johnny!"

Johnny followed where Shaundi was pointing and saw the Boss walking down the road in the pouring rain. He pulled over to the curb and hurriedly jumped out of the car. He ran over to the Boss and turned her around by the shoulders.

He gasped when he saw her; she had blue lips, her cheeks were bright red and she was shaking like a leaf. But it was her eyes that were scaring him the most; they were vacant, staring into thin air. She couldn't even focus on Johnny.

"Boss, are you ok? We've been looking all over the fucking city for you." Johnny said, trying to her attention.

Shaundi raced out of the car, catching up with them both, "Holy shit, Johnny. What the fuck is wrong with her?"

"I don't know," Johnny answered, "She's not even looking at me; she's just staring into space. We need to get her into the car and take her home; she's going to catch her death out here."

Shaundi took hold of one shoulder, while Johnny took the other one. They both steered her towards the car, while she walk obediently. With the both of them, they managed to get her into the car and strap her in.

"Johnny, give me your jacket," Shaundi commanded, "We need to keep her warm."

Johnny nodded and pulled his jacket off and wrapped it around the Boss. She didn't even respond.

"Should we ring Luke and tell him we found her?" Shaundi asked.

Johnny nodded as he got into the car. "He'll want to know that we found his sister."

They sped off to the hideout while Shaundi rang Luke.

"Luke? Hey, we found her but she's in bad shape. Have you tried getting a hold of Carlos?" Shaundi nodded as she listened to Luke giving her the news that no one had heard from Carlos. "Shit, ok. Well, we're about to pull into the hideout with her. Someone turn on the shower immediately so we can get her warm. Ok, cool. See you soon."

"Luke's sorting out the shower." Shaundi told Johnny who just looked at the Boss with a worried expression.

When they had pulled into the hideout, they immediately steered the Boss to her bedroom.

"It'll be quicker if I carry her." Johnny said as he picked her up and carried her bridal style, holding her tightly against his chest.

Johnny carried her to her room and started to undress the Boss without even thinking.

"Whoa, whoa!" said Shaundi, "Carlos will kill you if he catches you doing that. I'll shower her, just get out of here."

He left without even looking back.