I'm still in denial about Addison leaving, that totally sucks - these guys are myfavourite pairing by far. The air just crackle when they are together!

I haven't seen any of season 4 or half of season 3, so all mistakes are mine, but feel free to drop me a line and tell me so i can update them in the next chapter!

Hope you enjoy my first foray into Grey's fic.

He really wasn't having a good day. There were no two ways about it. He had been assigned to Dr Shepherd for the day and their patient had bled out on the table. Add that to working with McDreamy; having him question him about Meredith every five seconds and then pretending that he didn't really care was driving Alex to distraction.

It had been a weird few months for him. The Ava/Rebecca fiasco had left him feeling bereft and unsure of what he was feeling. Also, since Dr Montgomery had left, some subtle dynamic in the hospital had changed. Especially for Alex. To his surprise, his interest in obstetrics and neo-natal care had increased, to the extent that he had become almost Cristina–like in his desire to get on the neo-natal cases. Dr Montgomery's replacement was a good enough mentor, he was still learning a lot, but he knew there was something missing; something that he recognised but was not keen to admit out lout. His 'frat-boy' image, although not really true, was something that he wanted to keep: sometimes people knowing that you had emotions was just an inconvenient truth, and one he was desperate to avoid. Hospital gossip was a pain he didn't understand how Meredith, George and Izzie could stand to have their lives scrutinised and in the spotlight so much. It would drive him mad if it were him. Some things it was just better to keep to yourself, he had learnt that from an early age – his father had seen to that. He had truly felt something for Addison, but she was gone know, he'd had his chance. She was wherever she was, and here was here. Alex sighed quietly to himself. He wasn't exactly the most introspective of guys, but every so often, usually when he had seen someone with a particularly bright shade of auburn hair and he would stop and berate himself for being, well, him. He didn't believe in happy endings, but part of him still wondered what might have happened if he hadn't been such a jackass. Today had been even worse. His and Shepherd's patient had been a woman with said hair. Watching her bleed out, knowing there was nothing that could be done, had been hard. That was why he was up here now. On the hospital roof, away from the hustle and bustle and the nosiness of his friends.

Glancing at his watch, he sighed and pulled himself slowly to his feet. He had a couple of patients to check on, and Bailey would have his ass if he went AWOL for much longer. He ambled down the stairs, s topping at the NICU floor to check on one of the newborn triplets that had arrived yesterday, about three months ahead of schedule. One of them, Mollie, had a weak heart, and he had been checking up on her regularly. As he rounded the corner, a flash of red caught his eye and he looked up in surprise. There, standing by the nurses' station, talking to Meredith, was Addison Montgomery. He stopped, momentarily stunned – what was she doing here?! – until a nurse came barrelling around the corner and smacked into him.
"Doctor Karev, I'm so sorry!" the nurse – he couldn't for the life of him remember her name – said nervously, leaning down to pick up the pile of folders that she had dropped. Alex absent-mindedly bent down to help her, his mind racing. Why was she here? He heard someone talking, and dragged his thoughts back to the present, forcing his eyes to focus on the nurse, who was still apologising profusely. He looked down at her, then over at the redhead who was watching the scene with a mixture of amusement and surprise. He caught her eye and started to move towards her.
"Don't worry about it." He mumbled at the nurse as he walked slowly down the corridor without taking his eyes of the woman in front of him.
"Hey." He said, as he came up to her and Meredith, his usual cockiness deserting him as he looked at the woman who had all but dominated his thoughts, and a fair few of his fantasies.
"Hey Alex!" Meredith replied, watching the pair closely. There was a weird vibe emanating from them, and she couldn't quite put her finger on what it was. "Are you here to check on the triplets?" she continued, wondering if Alex was actually going to acknowledge her presence. There was a momentary pause, so slight that she might have imagined it, then Alex replied,
"Yeah I wanted to see how they were doing. I'm scrubbing in on Mollie's surgery in a couple of days, when she's a little stronger."
Meredith nodded and smiled, glancing once more between the pair.
"Well, I better be going." She announced cheerfully, "it was good to see you again Doctor Montgomery. Have a safe trip back to LA." She smiled, noting Alex's reaction to her words. As she turned to leave, Addison spoke,
"Take care, Meredith. Think about what I said, ok?" They both watched as Meredith made her way down the corridor. Then there was silence. The only sounds were those native to the hospital: machinery, the occasional baby's cry, and the staff chattering as they went about their duties. Between them, however, there was just silence. Finally Alex forced himself to speak.
"So," he paused, "LA huh? Well it looks like it agrees with you." He wasn't lying either, he didn't think he had ever seen her looking so radiant. Her skin was lightly tanned, her deep red hair was streaked with a natural tones of gold and copper. She smiled at him. He had grown up a bit since the last time she had seen him, when she had walked away from quite possibly the most confusing man she had ever known, let alone fallen for. He looked a little more worldly-wise, something she knew he had always had been, but had always covered up with his frat-boy posturing. She nodded.
"An old med school friend runs a clinic there." She replied,
"That has to be slightly different from Seattle Grace." He said, "What are you doing back here?"
"Richard asked me back for a consult," Addison replied in a similar, slightly awkward tone of voice, "I'm heading back to LA tomorrow morning." She felt herself shiver slightly under the intensity of his gaze. He was watching her closely, almost as if he was memorising her features. She opened her mouth to ask him how he was enjoying being a resident, when he broke in abruptly,
"Are you seeing anyone?" she blinked, but before she had a chance to respond – whether to tell him to mind his own business or not, she wasn't quite sure – he carried on talking, "Sorry, it's none of my business." He ran his fingers nervously through his hair. "Forget I said that." He trailed off, the intensity in his eyes returning in full force. There was another pregnant pause. Addison felt her legs grow a little weak under his gaze, and she cursed the blush that she knew was rising to her cheeks.
"So you're still trying to get into obstetrics then?" she replied at last. Alex shrugged.
"It sure beats plastics. I had vision of ending up like Sloan!"A small grin, "Besides, I used to have this really hot mentor, and she kind of helped develop my interest." Her cheeks were so aflame at that comment that it took all of her willpower not to cover her face with her hands.
"Alex…" she started, but words failed her. He flashed her his usual half smile, and reached over to grab her hand,
"I've missed you." He said, so softly she briefly wondered if she had imagined it. He blushed slightly, and let go of her hand. "It was nice to see you again, Addi…Doctor Montgomery. I'm afraid I have to go and check on a couple of patients, otherwise Bailey and your ex-husband will start shouting at me!" Again that half smile. Addison smiled back at him, a tiny ray of hope forcing its way into her heart.
"Good to see you, Doctor Karev." She replied, "If you ever find yourself in LA then look me up." He nodded, and awkwardly looked at the ground.
"Bye." he mumbled, before heading towards the NICU. As he started to key in the code, he heard her speak again.
"Alex?" he turned to look at her, "I'm not seeing anyone." She said simply, offering him a killer smile. He hesitated. There was an on-call room right behind her, and he couldn't help remember her pushing him into a similar one, all those months ago. Then his mind flashed to her sitting in the reception area. "I'm not your boyfriend" he'd said. What an ass! How could he have been both so stupid and so mean. Especially when that was what he had wanted all along. He met her eyes and gave her an uncomfortable smile,
"That's good to know." He heard himself say, and then he carried on into the NICU, glancing back at her one last time.

Addison watched him go with a mixture of sadness and amusement. She wasn't blind; she had noticed the slight wistfulness in his last look back. It seemed they were destined never to say what the other wanted to hear at the right time.
"I saw that!" Callie's voice came from behind her, "You just can't keep away from your little boy toy!" Addison turned round and laughed,
"I don't know what you mean!" she replied innocently.
"Please! You were practically drooling." Callie smirked. "Why don't you just drag him into another on-call room and get it over with!?"
"Callie Torres!" Addison exclaimed, glancing around frantically to see if anyone had heard.
"C'mon, Addie, admit it! The though crossed your mind at least once during that conversation." Addison couldn't help but smile, and blushed, knowing her friend had caught her out. "He's been pretty different since you left." Callie added suddenly. She wasn't overly keen on Alex, but she didn't really know him that well and she believed that her friend had seen a different side to him. And besides, Addison had been through enough. She deserved to be happy. Karev couldn't be that much of an idiot – she had a feeling that the side most people saw of Alex was just a front. Watching him around Addison was kind of sweet. He was obviously totally smitten, but for whatever reason was refusing to fully admit this, either to himself, or to Addison. Addison looked at her questioningly,
"What do you mean?" she asked. Callie hesitated; a lot of what she was about to repeat was nurses' gossip, but some were her own observations.
"He's just different. You know he's aiming to specialise in Neo-natal now? Alex Karev? The Mark Sloan clone?!" Addison frowned at that.
"He's not like Mark." She interjected quickly.
"He was." Callie pointed out, "Not so much anymore. You know, he hasn't dated anyone since you left? Some people thought he was with Meredith's half-sister. But he's not. I overheard her discussing him with some of the other interns. He told her that he was into someone else, and when she asked who, he just told her that she didn't live here anymore." Addison looked surprised,
"But even if he did mean me, he told me himself he wasn't interested." She replied.
"Well if you ask me, from the way he was looking at you just now, I'd say he's changed his mind!"

At that moment, the door to the NICU opened, and Alex walked out chatting to Izzie, who had also been checking on the triplets. All of them froze. Alex seemed shocked to see Addison still standing there; he could barely take his eyes off of her. Addison, terrified that he had heard what she and Callie had been discussing, blushed hotly. Callie and Izzie were watching each other warily.
"Doctor Montgomery!" Izzie exclaimed after a moment, "I heard you were back. How long are you staying for?"
"Just a flying visit I'm afraid, Stevens." Addison replied, glancing between Alex and Izzie and trying to ignore the flicker of jealousy that was igniting inside. "If you'll all excuse me," she continued, glancing at her watch, "I have a meeting with Richard in a few minutes so I should get going. It was good to see you again, Stevens, Karev." She nodded at them both, holding Alex's gaze for a moment longer than necessary. "You coming, Callie?"She led the way down the corridor, and Callie, after a moment at looking at the other two, followed her. The moment that they were out of earshot, Izzie turned to Alex,
"What was that?!" she asked.
"What do you mean?" he replied cagily,
"The ex-she shepherd," Izzie answered, searching his face for a clue, "she wasn't blushing that hard because of me!"
"It's nothing Iz." Alex mumbled in response, not meeting her gaze.
"Seriously?!" Izzie asked, "that's all you're going to give me?! You know all about my love life."
"Iz, the entire hospital knows about your love life!" Alex retorted teasingly, "Some of us prefer to keep things quiet." He stopped, realising that he had dropped himself in it.
"So there's something to keep secret then?" Izzie replied with a grin.
"Izzie..." he said, pleadingly. She rolled her eyes at him,
"Fine. I won't say anymore. But one day I will get it out of you."

About an hour and a half later, Addison and Callie were sat in a corner at Joe's havng a coffee.
"I can't believe you aren't going to do anything about the boy toy!" Callie was saying, "Seriously!" Addison quirked an eyebrow at her friend,
"Seriously?!" she echoed, "Been spending too much time around the 12 year olds have we!"
"Don't change the subject." Callie retorted with a grin, "Why won't you do anything?"
"He made his feelings perfectly clear." Addison replied, a little despondently.
"Sure he did." Callie replied sarcastically, "You should have seen the way he was looking at you. The boy is totally smitten."
"He really isn't." Callie grinned,
"Well, the way I see it, you have two choices." She replied, "You can go on being stubborn and miss what may be your last opportunity with him." Addison rolled her eyes. "Or," Callie continued, "You can invite him out for a drink and see where the night goes."
Addison sighed. Callie was right, and she knew it. But she couldn't bear the idea that he might say no. It would just be so humiliating. She took a sip of her coffee, an idea forming slowly in her mind.

Alex felt exhausted as he wandered into the locker room and started to get ready to leave for the night. He was tempted to drop in at Joe's and drown his sorrows with a few beers; it had been a long day, and seeing Addison had thrown him off his game a little. He sighed, wondering where she had gone. He hadn't seen her in the hospital since earlier that day when they had met outside the NICU. He really wanted to see her again before she left, but that didn't look very likely. He supposed he could go to her hotel – presumably she was staying the same one – but that was a little too crazy stalker-like for him. He shoved open the door and wandered into the locker room where he found Izzie and Meredith chatting as they got changed.
"Hey Alex," Meredith said as he came in, "we're heading home in a few minutes. Are you coming?" He smiled at her as he moved around the corner to his locker.
"Sure, sounds good." He replied, pulling of his scrub vest and reaching to open his locker. As the door opened, a piece of paper fell out onto the floor, as if it had been wedged down the side of the door, completely unnoticed by Alex himself, who was focussed on pulling out a shirt so that he could get out of there as quickly as possible. Luckily for him, Izzie was a little more observant, reaching down to pick it up from her position on the bench.
"You dropped thi…" she trailed off as she glanced at the note. The pink writing was familiar to it, but she couldn't place it. It was dated that day, and read: 'Meet me at Joe's at 8' She grinned at him, holding out the note, "Hot date?!" she asked teasingly. He looked up from buttoning his shirt in confusion,
"huh?" he asked dumbly, staring at the piece of paper in her hand.
"C'mon Alex, who is she? I didn't know you were seeing anyone?" Izzie pressed, waving the paper in front of his face until he snatched it from her hand,
"I'm not." He replied, staring at the sheet of paper now resting in his grip. He recognised the writing immediately, and his heart gave a leap as he realised who it was from. Izzie rolled her eyes,
"So who is leaving you little notes in your locker then?!" she replied. Meredith laughed as Alex blushed slightly,
"He so knows who it is." She said to Izzie, who took the note back and re-read it.
"I really recognise the writing," She said with a frown, "but I can't place it." There was a pause as the two girls looked at Alex expectantly. Then Izzie exclaimed,
"Oh my god, it's Montgomery isn't it?! I thought there was something weird going on there." He coughed and replied,
"There's nothing going on between me and Montgomery, Iz." Both girls looked at him knowingly.
"Sure there isn't." Meredith chimed in, exchanging an amused glance with Izzie. "Things were weird between you two earlier. What did you do to her?!"
"Nothing!" Alex mumbled in reply, still staring at the note that was back in Izzie's hand.
"Ok, so what did you not do to her then?!" Izzie asked with a smirk. Alex looked up. "Oh my god, you slept with the ex-she shepherd?!" she exclaimed, taking in the look on his face. That look quickly turned to panic, as he looked round frantically to check there no-one else had overheard,
"Izzie!" he all but shouted, "Keep it down will you?" Izzie stared at him.
"You really like her." She stated. It wasn't a question. Alex's feelings were written all over his face. He didn't answer. "Well?" she carried on, glancing at her watch, "What are you waiting for? It's almost 8! You better get going!" When Alex didn't move, she added, "Alex! You're gonna be late!" He shrugged. He didn't know what to do. He was torn between wanting to ignore the note, put her out of his mind and get on with his life, and racing across to Joe's, pulling her into his arms and kissing her for all she was worth. However, part of him knew that he would never do either of those things. She had been almost constantly on his mind from the moment they had kissed all those months ago, but things were complicated. She lived in LA now. Was there any point in going to meet her? She'd be on the first plane out of Seattle tomorrow morning. He felt a hand on his arm, dragging him towards the door. Meredith was pulling along.
"Mer, what are you..?" he trailed off as the door swung open before them, and George and Cristina came in.
"What's evil spawn done this time?" Cristina asked immediately, looking suspiciously at them.
"Nothing!" Meredith replied, taking her hand off his arm. "I was just trying to hurry Alex up." Cristina didn't look convinced.
"Whatever." She said, "Let's go to Joe's. I'm in serious need of tequila!" Alex opened his mouth to respond, when Meredith jumped in for him, she guessed that he wouldn't want an audience for his, whatever it was, with Addison.
"I don't really feel like Joe's tonight. Why don't we go and get drunk at my house?" Cristina shrugged,
"Same difference I suppose." She looked round at the group. "Let's go then people!" They all got ready to leave in record time, apart from Alex, who was staring broodily into his locker.
As they headed out the door, George turned to him,
"Are you not coming Alex?" Alex looked up and caught Meredith's eye,
"I'll meet you guys there; I've got a few errands to run first."
"See you later then." George replied, obviously not suspecting anything, as he followed the girls out of the locker room.
Alex watched them leave, then turned back to his locker, studying the note that Izzie had surreptitiously given back to him.

So, what did you think?? Shall I continue?

All reviews, good and bad, are appreciated!

Thanks for reading!!