How Hades Stole Christmas
(A Kid Icarus parody of How the Grinch Stole Christmas)
Every human in Angel Land loved Christmas a lot,
Singing joyous song, decorating and whatnot.
Even the gods celebrated Christmas, and were just a joyful,
Spreading the cheer around by the handful.
However, there was one deity who hated Christmas in the whole world,
It was none other than Hades, Lord of the Underworld.
Hades had always hated Christmas with a burning passion,
All the joy that was spread and all the Christmas fasion.
Maybe the reason was because the humans were so happy at that,
Or maybe it was because it was also celebrated by Palutena and Pitty-Pat.
But whatever the reason, Hades couldn't bear to watch,
As the humans continued their cheering, it felt like a kick to the crotch.
"Those humans, I can't stand them." Hades said with a frown.
"Too much happiness just coming from one little town."
"There must be one way to stop Christmas from coming."
"That way my ears would stop humming."
Hades thought for a moment for an idea, something unlawful,
Until an idea struck his mind, and boy was it awful.
"I've got a great idea. It's flawless, no doubt."
"I'll just take everything, so that the humans won't have anything to be happy about."
The plan was perfect, too perfect for a trick,
Hades had just decided to send an Eggplant Wizard as Jolly old Saint Nick.
With the snap of his fingers and a quick dash,
An Eggplant Wizard appeared in front of him in a flash.
"Nice of you to come, Eggplant Wizard. Listen close and fast."
"Get rid of everything that has anything to do with Christmas."
With a nod of his head and a "Yes, sir."
He was transported to the Overworld, anticipating for what was to occur.
Anything and everything in sight, he began to take,
From wreaths and stocking to ornaments and candy canes, and even fruitcake.
Not that it really mattered, since fruitcake is what no one likes,
Because that and Brussels sprouts are too alike.
Hades grinned as he watched as Eggplant Wizard threw everything away,
His plan was going perfect, no one could get in his way.
Eggplant Wizard continued to discard everything in sight, from above and underneath,
However, just as he was about to steal another wreath,
A voice came from behind him and said "Hey, you!"
He turned around and saw that it was none other than Pittoo.
(Dark Pit glares at the narrator)
Oh, um...sorry, I meant Dark Pit,
Who then said, "Put that thing back, you trick!"
"That didn't really rhyme, but I do not care."
"You've messed with the wrong person, so fight me if you dare!"
With a twirl of his staff, he threw an eggplant at the dark angel,
Who stepped out of the way, it missed him by an angle.
The angel got back and shot an arrow fearlessly,
And the Eggplant Wizard was defeated effortlessly.
Hades was devastated that his plan had been foiled,
He became enraged and his blood had been boiled.
"Curses! Foiled again!" Hades thought he would shed a tear,
He then shook his head and said "Oh, well. Maybe next year."
And so, Christmas was saved thanks to Dark Pit,
Chirstmas was pefect for everybody, it was a hit.
The moral of this story, in case you forgot,
Don't try to steal Christmas or else you might get caught.
The End