Fair is Foul and Fowl Isn't
By Spectra16 (Headline: Vampire Boy Genius Discovers Way To Make Broccoli Taste like Chocolate)
A/N: I absolutely love Artemis Fowl. I think Eoin Colfer deserves a kick to the groin for his other books, but the Fowl series turned out for some reason. So here's a song about the books. And in this song there is a few references to Macbeth.
If you like this song, I have others on my fan fiction account, but they are for other books like To Kill a Mockingbird and Series of Unfortunate Events.
Disclaimer: I don't own Artemis Fowl. Again, this song is going to sound like something out of My Chemical Romance's Three Cheers for Revenge cd.
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Fair is Foul and Fowl Isn't
(Verse 1)
Bloodshot in the night,
A glowing sense of insecurity.
Make us believe in something that can't be seen.
The code reads through their culture.
You spend time sitting alone,
Father in Kola, mother on her own.
Some kids turn to drugs, sex, and violence.
But not Arty.
He digs throwing a society's world on it's side.
(Chorus)
Fair is foul and Fowl isn't.
Double bubble, Grub and Trouble,
Foaly types as Root bubbles,
Holly flies and off goes her finger,
Almost makes you wanna be a Chicago gangster.
(Verse 2)
Watch your step over that goblin goo.
Switch your fandom to use the Floo.
Opal Koboi, what a Babe-raham Lincoln!
She's got Cudgeon on a lease, bondage an' all.
I wish I could self-induce comas.
She's in Witness Protection in Oklahoma.
That's what a life of crime will do to you, they say.
Or at least if you get in A. Fowl's way!
(Chorus 2)
Fair is foul and Fowl isn't.
Double bubble, Grub and Trouble.
Fowl mansion almost blown to rubble.
Butler's got an L on his chest,
And then Fowl takes off Holly's vest.
(Verse 3)
Aurum est potestas. That's the way it is.
If Arty doesn't get it, he kidnaps you kids.
Crime doesn't get you everything,
So Old Peg Leg will tell you twice,
He'll hack your computer to see if you were naught or nice.
Russia is a damn cold place,
It made Senior even stronger.
While he was getting frostbite in Kiev,
Angeline was bathing in a spa.
And while they were oblivious,
Artemis was being devious.
(Chorus 3)
Fair is foul and Fowl isn't.
Double bubble, Grub and Trouble.
Chix to the rescue, on the double!
Mediocrity is for the middle class.
And Juliet will piledrive your ass.