A/N- Here's a little one shot based on the song The city by Ed Sheeran, please R & R.
All around me all I can hear is noise. Sirens, car horns, general traffic and drunken shouts filled the night surrounding me, suffocating me. Yet still I can't control myself throwing my hood up tying my laces I headed out into the night. The lights of the city shine brighter than any star, dousing the city in light even in the middle of the night.
I can't sleep without thinking about him what he did to me was unforgivable and unjustifiable. Bringing me, a stranger to this city showing me love, a home when really I was just a stranger and outsider looking in. He left me here on my own without a second thought thinking if he said sorry I would come running back into his arms forgiving every little thing he'd ever done to hurt me. Harry Styles the boy who thinks the world revolves around him but not me not this time. I can do whatever I want and it's up to no one to tell me what to do.
My mind still racing with thoughts of my ex-boyfriend I took to the streets losing myself in the life of the city. If the city never sleeps that makes two.
People call me the stranger the traveller always on the move but never leaving the city. I just accept it not really caring that not a single person remembers my name is actually Abi. I left her behind along time ago never to return just like Harry. The amount of times I've seen him on the streets with some other girl and yet I just remind myself that I'm not Abi anymore and those hypnotic eyes have no hold over me.
I don't think I will ever leave the City no amount of painful memories will turn me away, here I can wander the streets without anyone asking why. This is my Home.
I don't have any friends no one really wants to be friends with the girl who wanders the streets wearing an unwashed hoody and skinny jeans that would be more at home in a garbage bin. The only friend I have is the pavements that will take me anywhere at all times of the night. Sometimes it trips me up and throws me back down taking me to places I'd rather not be, situations I don't want to be in. Its not what I'm used to this city with its noise its blinding lights. But it's still my favourite place to be.
It takes me away from the fact that no sleep has distorted my features. No food has made my bones stick out dangerously. Not washing has turned me into a greasy haired, dirty faced individual. Its not my fault its his I remind myself constantly he's the one that kicked me out with no explanation and only my guitar for company. I still had money in the bank of course not much but enough for a few months. Now I had nothing but the few quid I managed to pick up from busking on the streets.
The shop across the road is always there for me with my drink that I couldn't live without. I'm quite good about it and only drink when it's dark so nobody will see it's actually me sitting in a shop door way balling my eyes out. Sometime voices beat through the brick walls I've cemented around my feelings. Its only then that I start to get thoughts doubts in the back of my mind that I'm not going to make it past tomorrow but I do I always do.
That's what I am, it's who I am, I'm a fighter giving up for no one.
God knows it's hard my lungs hurt from all the smoke I breathe in and sometimes my ears bleed from the noise of it all. Its like it wants to swallow me up and consume me echoing on repeat inside my brain. But this is what I need to keep me alive, or is it. Harry came up to me once while I was busking he put a 20 into my guitar case, not once looking up at my face. When he did his expression showed true horror at what I'd become this wreck of a human being. But he just turned away back to his cozy little life where he didn't have to think about poor little me wandering the streets. That was the moment I became Abi again, just for that few seconds he looked at me I just wanted him to take in his arms tell me he's sorry to wipe away the tear that had spilled onto my cheek. Yet as soon as he looked away the walls were back up and I was transformed back into the cold shell I had created for myself.
That's who I am; I'm from the city that never stops raining, were the pollution on the streets messes with your head changing people from what they were. I was just a little country girl when I moved out. But then I grew up to fast leaving everyone at home that cared behind me never giving them a second thought. Now I'm paying for my actions and all I have now is my music that I devote my life to. But I know that this dark city with its blinding lights and overwhelming noise has changed me and I don't think it's really for the best. And now instead of hiding I fight, I fight for my life I fight just to live with all my crushing heartache day after day. London's my home I will never forget it not when my heart slows down and I struggle to breathe I will still manage to walk out my front door just like tonight and walk and walk till I can't feel my feet anymore.
I know its crazy but one day I hope that Harry finds me, that he breaks down all the walls I've built so I can be Abi again the naïve little country girl. But for now I come to another fork in the road and I turn down one I've never been down before wondering where it will take me.
The city never sleeps and that makes 2.