From Small Beginnings

Another turning point, a fork stuck in the road,

Time grabs you by the wrists, directs you where to go.

Yesterday's been buried, asphyxiated past,

You follow the white light, but nothing ever lasts…

The ash grey sky was an omen for Bella. The flood of clouds stretched on without beginning or end on the sunless canvas. A brown Chevrolet rolled by underneath on a quiet road, with Bella in the back, legs stretched out across the seat. Her pale arm reached behind her head, cushioning it from the window. A set of head phones sat snug in her ears, and her eyes stared unfocused at the moving blur of green beyond the opposite window. Her fingers curled absentmindedly around the strands of her mahogany hair.

Above the sound of music, Bella could hear the chatter of her mom's voice.

"I still can't believe we found a nice place at such a cheap rent! Now we can use the extra money for all the traveling between games."

"Yeah sure, but don't forget all my expenses are covered by the team's owners anyways." replied Phil.

"But mine aren't! Now I can come with you everywhere! And who knows, with the extra cash we can do a little more than just traveling between games." She winked and elbowed him lightly.

And so continued the ceaseless discussions of Jacksonville, apartments, the Jacksonville Suns, traveling, the upcoming roster, batting stats, and this and that. Bella had never seen her mom so excited, and found her enthusiasm to be pleasant—yet insulting. In all the thrill of the big move, Renee spoke little about Bella's arrangement. Bella surmised this to be as a result of some possible guilt, and was pleased, in an unsatisfying way. In the end, Renee and Phil would be moving to the bright and more importantly warm Jacksonville, and she would be transferred to the wet, drab city of Forks, which perpetually lacked sunlight and was bleak with any prospects of Bella holding a life that was unknown to the small town of 3000 people. Or so she remembered from spending her summers there as a child with her father Charlie.

The decision to return to her birthplace was a quick one, which required little to none of Bella's own input. Recalling correctly, it was a Sunday evening, shortly after New Year's Day. Bella sat propped against the headboard of her bed, enjoying a leisure read during the winter holidays off from school. Dan Brown's Angels and Demons was no literary masterpiece, nor was it all that different from his other books, but it was her thrill of the week. So she sat, plowing through it page by page, with an empty carton of Chinese take-out beside her, when her mom came into the room.

She expected the same artificial smile cut into Renee's lips since Phil announced his recruitment onto the Jacksonville Suns Minor League Baseball team. His move to Florida had Renee insecure about holding on to her great catch for some time. But today it was all teeth, and her skin actually crinkled at the corner of her eyes. Bella knew immediately that Renee was genuinely happy about something. She looked up from her book, her eyes wide and inquisitive.

"Hey Bella, honey! How's that book coming along?" What? No, get to the point. "Well," she settled herself neatly at the end of Bella's bed. "we've, well, I've finally come up with a solution for us to be able to work out Phil's arrangement!" Oh, so we're moving. "We've found a buyer for the house! I'm still looking into places in Jacksonville, but I'm sure something will come up by the time the buyer will move in, which should be at the end of February. Anyways… we've also got a great idea for you too sweety!" Oh? "You're going to be moving back to your summer homeland, Forks!"

…Oh.

Renee moved up to hug her. "Oh look at you! You're going to be with your dad again, I know how much you love spending time with Charlie!" Bella didn't recall hugging her mom back, and Renee left before she could make any show of disappointment. Her eyes returned to her book, narrowed, and her lips formed an indignant line.

There are a few milestones in a girl's life where her mother's presence is most noted: her birth, of course, when she gets that monthly "gift", her sweet sixteen, her first kiss, her senior prom, and her wedding. To each girl, her mother represents a mixed bag of support, awkward talks, the source of inane amounts of picture snapping, and the only person crying over the situation. So it would seem unusual to many that Renee would even consider sending Bella 3000 miles away in the middle of her junior year for an indefinite amount of time that would likely extend well beyond her senior prom.

But for Bella, she was just surprised at how she hadn't this coming.

Typical for any B-rated movie, Bella had been conceived on the night of Charlie and Renee's junior prom. To prevent any small town scandal, the honourable Charlie proposed to Renee. She accepted, her elation owing more to throwing a big wedding party than his professions of love. Eight and a half months later, Isabella Hayden Swan had been born, shortly before Charlie had graduated high school and secured a job as Constable Swan at the police department. Her birth was also soon after Renee left school for good.

Standing by his word, he purchased a mortgage for a small house that backed out into the woods, furnished with all the amenities suited for a comfortable family life together. Unfortunately for Charlie, Renee's eyes were already set on the bigger prize, or so they had been ever since she came to realize what a hole Forks was to live in. But Charlie had his new job, the house, his friends, his family, his memories, and every other excuse he mustered up whenever Renee urged him to move to the city.

It wasn't long before Renee kicked the bucket underneath Charlie's dream, crafted to perfection. But it was not without resistance. Charlie fought Renee throughout the whole process, from when she annulled the marriage, claiming it was just for the baby and that they didn't love each other (a low blow), winning custody for Bella, packing all her things, and finding a temporary place to stay in with her cousin in Sacramento. He even pleaded with her as she made her way to the front door, bags, baby, and plane tickets in her hands. It wasn't until she turned on him, finally acknowledging his presence in the whole fiasco that he stopped. Her eyes burned holes into his, and her voice was steely.

"Just let me go Charlie."

Of course, Bella learned this once when Renee was drunk. No one else would ever admit to breaking a heart of gold like Charlie's the way she had. Not while they were sober at least.

After that, Renee was finally free to live the bohemian life she always dreamed of. There was plenty of booze, boys, booty calls, and sure enough, Bella. Except somewhere in between juggling jobs, parties and her child, Renee realized that Bella was growing and would now need more than formula, fresh diapers and a baby sitter. From then on Bella became the one drag on her freedom. In return, Bella received a much compromised upbringing. The only time life was stable for Bella was when she visited Forks during the summer holidays, an arrangement sought out by Renee. But Bella hated those visits. Kind as he was, she never found herself becoming close with Charlie, and he seemed to withdraw all the same. And she hated being confined indoors from the rain when she was supposed to be playing outside.

Those visits stopped when Phil entered the beaten composition of their family. He was the jock-type then too, tall, tanned and strapping. But there must have been something in his lack-luster grey eyes that enchanted Renee, because she refused to move on from him, even when he tried to. Bella thought he seemed just like all the others before him. She also thought her mom had succeeded in vanquishing all her previous dating records with Phil being eight years her junior. But Renee claimed that the Minor League Baseball player was her true love. Other women in their neighborhood in Phoenix, Arizona claimed she was a salacious cougar who was finally tied up to someone. She met Phil four years ago, when Bella was thirteen, and they had been living common law ever since.

Bella evaluated her life with Renee as she lay behind her in Phil's car. She had spent a significant part of her life with her, and pockets of time in absence. And after much reflection, the cumulative effect of leaving Renee for Forks during what could have been defined as a crucial time in her life left Bella feeling nothing more than mere indifference. What was it, but another fork in the road?

She changed the music on her mp3 player, untangling the cord from her necklace. It was a dulled silver pendant in the shape of a vintage sailor wheel, perfectly symmetrical except for the small hoop where the black string that held it looped through. Bella had received it from Renee for her thirteenth birthday. Renee purported that it was an heirloom from her grandmother and that it was good luck. Whatever. Renee couldn't keep a job long enough to make the next month's rent, let alone hold a family treasure. Bella believed that it probably belonged to somebody's grandmother, and that it made a special and affordable birthday gift idea for her at the pawn shop. But even so, Bella found herself drawn to it. Perhaps it was the unique shape of the pendant that matched her tomboyish personality, or that she liked feeling its presence resting against her chest, always warmer than anything else she wore, or even that Renee had never given her anything so unique, but it never left Bella's neck after that day.

She picked it up and ran her fingers against the rounded edges for the umpteenth time. It was a vestige from her past, the only one that Bella brought along with her. Her eyes followed its shape, where the piece of metal formed a ring. And then it became unnerving to Bella, how soon it was in her thus short life that she too had come full circle.

* * *

The wheels of Bella's suitcase clicked against the ridges of the floor tiles of Quillayute airport in Forks, Washington. Propped against her opposite shoulder was a loaded duffle bag that dragged at her, making her lean to one side as she walked. A flock of eyes assaulted her when she emerged from the baggage hall but quickly moved away, save for a chestnut-coloured pair, with a set of matching furrowed eyebrows. Charlie wasn't upset, but it was unlike him to ever show any display of outward enthusiasm. The stark contrast between his persona and Renee's was refreshing. Bella knew at once she would welcome Charlie's presence more than her mom's.

One of the changes she was most greatful for was that he spoke with efficiency.

"Hey there Bells," Came a brusque greeting.

"Hey Charlie—Dad ." Bella replied, hastily correcting herself. She never referred to him as dad unless she spoke to him, and as they were out of touch, she had been out of practice. She surveyed the walls on her side awkwardly.

Charlie was unfazed. "How was your flight?" If she heard correctly, he even seemed amused. Bella relaxed.

"It was fine. They didn't play any movies though." He nodded slowly, and continued to look ahead of them as he spoke to her.

"So…" he started reluctantly, scratching his face underneath his trimmed moustache. Bella's arrival must have counted as a special occasion to him. "How was Vegas?"

Bella silently grimaced. The road trip to Las Vegas was Renee's idea. The weekend spent celebrating Phil's recruitment had left her mollified. After a glimpse of drunk Renee and Phil at the slots, she denied all association for the remainder of the trip. One particular conversation Bella overheard during breakfast involved the great time they had at the strip club the night before, with descriptions of Tina Tingles, their favourite dancer. Bella wished they spared her by sending her to Forks two days sooner.

"It was exactly what you'd expect on a trip with mom." She replied gingerly.

Charlie's lips very gradually spread into a humoured smile.

"I… see." Was all he said.

The only more horrifying part of the trip was the ride home in Charlie's police cruiser. Bella sat rigid in the front seat, casting her eyes away from the window lest she was recognized by any passersby. In a failed attempt at humour, Charlie had originally suggested to move the duffle bag to the front seat, vacating the back of the cruiser for Bella. One glance at her face stifled any further mention of the idea.

The tires slowed, crunching against the gravel of the drive way, and stopped behind the most absurd heap of metal Bella had ever seen. It was a pickup truck, except Bella was certain Charlie must have bent the laws of time in order to get his hands on it. She believed it to have been red once, but with time there encroached a new layer of orangey rust and dents.

"So I figured you would need to get around somehow. This is for just that." Charlie astutely informed Bella. Evidently she had no other option.

Oh crap. And that was that. He tossed her the keys and dragged her luggage inside. He didn't even give me a chance, thought Bella as she saw all prospects of entertaining a social life dissipate before the car.

Another set of tires dragged to a stop on the pavement behind her. She turned around to find two men emerge, the first, aged and grey, was supported in a wheel chair by the other. The younger man appeared to be less like a man and more of a medium sized tree. He towered at somewhere approaching six feet and five inches, and although he slouched over the older man's chair, his shoulders were expansive. He wore a teasing, fitted black full sleeve shirt which sculpted the muscles of his body perfectly, giving him the appearance of a heavy weight wrestler, and his skin glowed bronze, convincing Bella that he was from somewhere far, far away from Forks. His cheeks were long and smooth, his lips full, and his eyes were brown and very narrow. His thick black hair was cropped short. He grinned at her. His teeth were two perfect lines of pearly white.

Bella had concluded on some uncomfortable facts. Those were that this dreadfully attractive man was approaching her, that she was still in her travelling clothes, and that she hadn't thought of combing her hair since last night. Her last resort was to pray to every force she could think of that he would not associate the ridiculous piece of junk she stood by with her.

"Hey Bella!" the tree and man greeted her. At closer inspection Bella recognized the man in the wheelchair to be Billy Black, a friend of her father's.

"Hi Billy, and…" she trailed off waiting for the tree to introduce himself.

"Come on, Bella, it's me, Jacob!"

…Woah. "Oh, wow Jacob I didn't recognize you at all. You've changed a lot since I last saw you."

Jacob grinned easily. "Yeah, it's been a while. You've changed quite a bit yourself too."

Bella looked down at herself. Stupid, not in the last thirty seconds. "I, yeah, I suppose I have." Suppose?! She seethed at herself, wondering why she couldn't speak free and effortlessly like Jacob, topping off with a casual chuckle. Bella had a sudden desire to fit in with him. She tucked a strand of hair behind her ear, panicking about what she should say next.

Jacob swiftly responded. "So, what do you think?" he motioned behind Bella.

Oh God. He's seen it. Play it cool. "What, this?" she threw a thumb at the truck. "Yeah… it's got that vintage look. I think Charlie just got it."

Jacob chuckled knowingly. "Yeah, I know he did, for you though. Have you driven it yet?"

Bella's heart sank into her feet. He knew, and this conversation would not last much longer. "No… not yet." She looked at the ground. It would be less painful if she couldn't see Jacob's scorn of disgust towards her and the car.

Instead, she could hear Jacob's smile through his words. "Well let me know what you think when you do. I have a personal attachment to this car."

Bella regarded Jacob with confusion. She couldn't understand the exact meaning of his taunt. Was it necessary to have lived in Forks as long as him to recognize this kind of slander?

He gestured towards the truck. "I sort of rebuilt the engine. That's my Dad's old truck. Well, his really old truck."

Bella arched her eyebrows and looked back. She placed a hand on its cold surface for the first time. "Wow Jacob, this is very impressive."

"Yeah Bella well it was either yours or Jacob's. I think you can now understand the reason behind this nice gesture of his." Billy chimed.

"Dad!" Jacob chided.

So you're the one that did this to me. "No, hey, thanks a lot Jacob. This is much better than being driven around by the Chief."

Jacob winked. "I thought so." Knots formed in Bella's stomach.

Bella turned around to the sound of footfall on the porch steps.

"All right Bells, I emptied out your bags in your room and took them into the basement. Hey bud. Jake." Charlie briefly nodded at the two of them.

"On for tonight?" Billy asked.

"Not today, covering the station. Saturday's still good, right?"

"You bet it is. Harry's bringing fish. You should come too, Bella." Billy offered.

"Aw, yes, God he hasn't made that stuff in a while. Yeah that's a great idea Bells, why don't you come along too?"

The three of them stared at Bella. She observed the ease at which Charlie mingled with Billy and Jacob. It was as if she were the only person in the world that could possibly be so socially awkward. What are they even doing on Saturday night?

Once again Jacob came in for the save. "Swing by some time Bella, especially in the evening. That way you can sit in for one of our ancient spirit chants. But you could come in the morning and afternoon too. We'd probably still be doing that."

What the hell? Bella was a disaster. A thousand things she could respond with swirled in her mind. None of those things came to her mouth. She was aware that her lips had parted a few times to speak but to no avail. She blinked her eyes and swallowed, mentally calculating how many second had passed in silence. Why blame the car? She was her own downfall.

Jacob laughed, clapping his hands together. "Oh my God Bella, you should see your face!" he choked out. Billy smacked him at the back of his leg twice.

"And that's what you get for stereotyping your people. These kids." He sighed. Charlie shook his head, grinning at Jacob with his arms crossed.

Bella's face was on fire, if that's what Jacob wanted her to see. She felt every inch of skin erupt in heat despite the cold February draft. She began to nod her head slowly, and even salvaged a smile.

"Nice one." Was all she could squeak.

To her immense and timely relief, Billy motioned Jacob towards their car, and they began to back out of the driveway.

"Anyways, I just wanted to see how you liked the work on the car. Give me a call once you get a chance to drive it, okay?" Jacob offered. Bella nodded, horrified and elated at the opportunity to speak with Jacob again.

"Alright Charlie, Saturday it is." Billy waved. Bella watched Jacob help Billy into his car, and then without looking back he hopped into the driver's seat and took off. She heard Charlie retreat into their home behind her, but Bella remained, her eyes trailing on the place where Jacob had stood. She imagined herself with him, chatting simply about mutual interests as if they had been old friends. When she was certain Charlie was out of ear's shot, Bella imitated Jacob's carefree laugh, but her version was contrived and suffocated. Vexed with herself, she quickly withdrew and walked towards the house, but not without noticing the unusually large foot print outlined in the gravel. She then mused, with revering curiosity, on how it was possible that a fifteen year old adolescent who was once slighter than her had come to resemble a fully grown, twenty-something year old, miniature giant.

Thank you all for making it to the end of Chapter 1! I hope you like what you've seen so far, it's so hard writing when it's not just for you anymore and you have to be mindful that other people will be reading it too! Just to let you know, Starry Night refers to the Van Gogh painting and the dark/eerie feeling you get looking at it, and of course, it represents night time and thus Edward. Sterling Sun is pretty much another phrase for full moon, which represents Jacob. And that's how I came up with the title! Please review if you like it!