Sirius, Remus, James, Lily, and Peter were walking in a muggle town.
(For no one quite knows the reason 'AH! That rhymed!')
"Ooooo! Let's go in there!" screamed Sirius pointing to a Wal-Mart.
"Come on Sirius!" James said grabbing the back of his friend's robes.
"NO! I want to go! Please?"
"Hmmm, let me think, NO."
"I might get bored and we know what happens when I get bored." Said Sirius smirking.
"FINE!" the others, yelled in defeat.
"Yippeeeeeeee!" Sirius screeched running toward the store.
"Maybe while we're there we can buy some duck tape and a chain saw." Remus muttered to James.
"PLEASE!" James groaned.
"We better catch him before something or someone gets hurt." Lily said running after Sirius.
The four ran into the store and found Sirius staring at the hamster cages.
"Padfoot, what are you doing?" Remus asked coming up behind him.
"They're SO cute!" He cooed looking at the hamsters.
"I don't think you should," Remus started but Sirius picked one up and hugged it tightly.
"SIRIUS! PUT IT DOWN! YOU'RE KILLING IT!" screamed Lily. She grabbed the hamster and pulled it from his clutches. "HEY!" he yelled back.
"Look what you did to the hamster!" she yelled louder waving the hamster in her fist in Sirius' face.
"It's ok. It's only playing dead." He said matter- a- factly.
"Sirius," Lily said forcing calm. "You killed the hamster. It's dead."
"NO!" Sirius cried flinging his arms around Remus' neck and sobbing hysterically.
"Get off!" Came Remus' muffled voice.
"I think we should go." Said Peter (finally I get a line) motioning to the people who were starting to stare.
"Good idea." James said freeing Remus and fleeing the scene.
The hamsters being very mad about a death in their family prepared for war.
"Ok you, Squeaky, turn off all the power and lights to the store. Binky, you follow THEM. Pinky you come with me." Ordered the leader hamster.
The five found the toy isle and were having fun. (At least for Sirius.)
"Um, Sirius? I don't think that goes there." Peter said cautiously. Sirius had found the Barbies and was... let's just say experimenting.
"What is this?" Remus asked to Lily.
"That would be play- dough."
"Oh. Do you eat it?"
"No it's like clay but," Lily grinned evilly. "I know someone who would take that as a deliquesce."
"Who? OH! Hey Padfoot." Remus said catching on.
"Huh?" Sirius grunted looking up from the decapitated Barbie.
"We have something for you." Lily really loved doing this.
"Aw you shouldn't have!" Padfoot yelled.
"I don't think that," James started but Remus elbowed him hard in the ribs.
"Here you go." Said Lily handing Sirius the play- dough.
"What is it?" Padfoot asked staring at the play- dough.
"Kind of like a, um, a doggie treat." Lily said.
"YUM!" Sirius took the play- dough and started to eat it. "This is good."
"You stupid prat!" James said laughing. "You don't eat it!"
"Ithiktisgoo." Sirius mumble.
"Padfoot, you didn't actually swallow that did you?" Remus questioned.
"Yeah." Sirius stopped eating and stared at James. "What did they do to me this time?"
"Oh, nothing life threatening." Lily said soothingly. "The label says non- toxic."
"Thanks Lily. Do you have any muggle money?" said Sirius.
"Why would you want it?"
"This is good." He said smiling.
"Gross. No I don't have any."
"Awww."
"Any way I wouldn't," Lily started but all of a sudden the lights flickered and went out.
"Lumous." Remus, Lily, Sirius, James, and Peter said as one taking out their wands.
"What the heck is that?" Sirius mumbled to James.
"What? Uh oh."
"Are those," Peter paused, "hamsters?"
"Yeah." Lily said backing up.
"There he is men! Attack!" said a small squeaky voice. The hamsters had found small army gear such as tanks, parachutes, and guns in the next isle.
"Cool! Hamsters!" Padfoot called walking forward. "Ouch!" One of the hamsters had just fired the small gun at Sirius.
"Oh I love this song!" Lily said to Remus. The song 'War' had just started playing. Lilly began dancing around in small circles, spinning faster than a jack rabbit on a hot skillet in the middle of June on a warm road near the border Dallas and- "AHEM!!!!!!" Shouted Sirius, Peter, James, Lily, and Remus.
Oh, oops got carried away there for a second like a grandma on bingo night down at the old retirement home where-
Sirius getting annoyed pulled the keyboard from the author's clutches and banged her over the head with it.
OW!!!
"Stop ranting and start writing!"
Fine! Hmph! Moving on!
"Lily I don't think this is the time nor the place."
"Run!" James yelled. The five ran out of the isle and down to sporting goods. Sirius and James jumped on top of the shelves then helped the others up.
"You shouldn't have hurt the hamster, Padfoot." Remus warned flicking a parachuting hamster off his head.
"At least things can't get any worse." Sirius shivers then leans over the side of the shelf and gasps in horror.
"What?" James asked leaning over also. "Don't tell me, I know. It got worse." Five three eyed, one legged, mutant, neon yellow space chickens had gathered around the bottom of the isle.
"You just had to say it didn't you?" Lily snapped at Sirius.
"Let's offer Padfoot as a sacrifice and maybe it will go away." Peter suggested.
"Let's." The four smirked evilly at Sirius who started backing up.
"Now guys lets be reasonable. It wasn't my fault the author had a crush on me, [not that I blame her who couldn't?] and listens to my every thought. She was the one who typed it! Offer her!" Sirius pleaded.
Leave me out of this! Came a disembodied voice from above their heads.
"Um.... Ms. Author Lady?" asked Remus in a sweet calm voice.
Yes Moony? Said the voice again.
"I simply can't get over how beautiful you ah... sound today."
Aw, thank you.
"So er... may we please ask a favor from you?" Sirius questioned standing up next to Remus. They glanced back at the three behind him who were currently battling the three chicken things at a weird wizard duel.
Anything for you Sirius. Sirius smirked at Remus who rolled his eyes and went to help the others.
"Well, I, I mean we were wondering if you would be so kind as to get rid of the chickens?"
And you think you can handle the hamsters?
"Sure. Piece of cake!"
Okie- dokie. All of a sudden the chickens vanished and all that was left were several shocked muggles and some hamsters with army gear.
"Thanks!"
Anything else I can do?
"Nope we're good for now." James said dragging Sirius off the shelf.
After all had descended the shelves Lily rounded on Sirius.
"Since when were you and the author so well aquatinted?" She yelled glaring at him.
"She's just another one of my many fans."
JUST ANOTHER FAN?!
"Oh no." Muttered Remus covering his eyes with his hands.
I THOUGHT WHAT WE HAD WAS SPECIAL!!!!!
"Of course it was special...." Sirius said.
LIAR!!!!!!
"No I'm not!!!!"
"For the love of Peter don't lie Sirius!!!!" Cried the others, praying these weren't their last moments as fictional book characters.
Suddenly there was a cold wind that blew through the store. Spinning and whipping wild around the five, the wind began to form a giant spiral around Sirius. When the wind settled he was gone.
"WHERE'S SIRIUS?!" Yelled James.
Look up.
And the others did there hanging from was-
AH!!!!!!!!! A CLIFFY!!!!!! THEY STRIKE AGAIN!!!!!!!!!!
"Ooooo! Let's go in there!" screamed Sirius pointing to a Wal-Mart.
"Come on Sirius!" James said grabbing the back of his friend's robes.
"NO! I want to go! Please?"
"Hmmm, let me think, NO."
"I might get bored and we know what happens when I get bored." Said Sirius smirking.
"FINE!" the others, yelled in defeat.
"Yippeeeeeeee!" Sirius screeched running toward the store.
"Maybe while we're there we can buy some duck tape and a chain saw." Remus muttered to James.
"PLEASE!" James groaned.
"We better catch him before something or someone gets hurt." Lily said running after Sirius.
The four ran into the store and found Sirius staring at the hamster cages.
"Padfoot, what are you doing?" Remus asked coming up behind him.
"They're SO cute!" He cooed looking at the hamsters.
"I don't think you should," Remus started but Sirius picked one up and hugged it tightly.
"SIRIUS! PUT IT DOWN! YOU'RE KILLING IT!" screamed Lily. She grabbed the hamster and pulled it from his clutches. "HEY!" he yelled back.
"Look what you did to the hamster!" she yelled louder waving the hamster in her fist in Sirius' face.
"It's ok. It's only playing dead." He said matter- a- factly.
"Sirius," Lily said forcing calm. "You killed the hamster. It's dead."
"NO!" Sirius cried flinging his arms around Remus' neck and sobbing hysterically.
"Get off!" Came Remus' muffled voice.
"I think we should go." Said Peter (finally I get a line) motioning to the people who were starting to stare.
"Good idea." James said freeing Remus and fleeing the scene.
The hamsters being very mad about a death in their family prepared for war.
"Ok you, Squeaky, turn off all the power and lights to the store. Binky, you follow THEM. Pinky you come with me." Ordered the leader hamster.
The five found the toy isle and were having fun. (At least for Sirius.)
"Um, Sirius? I don't think that goes there." Peter said cautiously. Sirius had found the Barbies and was... let's just say experimenting.
"What is this?" Remus asked to Lily.
"That would be play- dough."
"Oh. Do you eat it?"
"No it's like clay but," Lily grinned evilly. "I know someone who would take that as a deliquesce."
"Who? OH! Hey Padfoot." Remus said catching on.
"Huh?" Sirius grunted looking up from the decapitated Barbie.
"We have something for you." Lily really loved doing this.
"Aw you shouldn't have!" Padfoot yelled.
"I don't think that," James started but Remus elbowed him hard in the ribs.
"Here you go." Said Lily handing Sirius the play- dough.
"What is it?" Padfoot asked staring at the play- dough.
"Kind of like a, um, a doggie treat." Lily said.
"YUM!" Sirius took the play- dough and started to eat it. "This is good."
"You stupid prat!" James said laughing. "You don't eat it!"
"Ithiktisgoo." Sirius mumble.
"Padfoot, you didn't actually swallow that did you?" Remus questioned.
"Yeah." Sirius stopped eating and stared at James. "What did they do to me this time?"
"Oh, nothing life threatening." Lily said soothingly. "The label says non- toxic."
"Thanks Lily. Do you have any muggle money?" said Sirius.
"Why would you want it?"
"This is good." He said smiling.
"Gross. No I don't have any."
"Awww."
"Any way I wouldn't," Lily started but all of a sudden the lights flickered and went out.
"Lumous." Remus, Lily, Sirius, James, and Peter said as one taking out their wands.
"What the heck is that?" Sirius mumbled to James.
"What? Uh oh."
"Are those," Peter paused, "hamsters?"
"Yeah." Lily said backing up.
"There he is men! Attack!" said a small squeaky voice. The hamsters had found small army gear such as tanks, parachutes, and guns in the next isle.
"Cool! Hamsters!" Padfoot called walking forward. "Ouch!" One of the hamsters had just fired the small gun at Sirius.
"Oh I love this song!" Lily said to Remus. The song 'War' had just started playing. Lilly began dancing around in small circles, spinning faster than a jack rabbit on a hot skillet in the middle of June on a warm road near the border Dallas and- "AHEM!!!!!!" Shouted Sirius, Peter, James, Lily, and Remus.
Oh, oops got carried away there for a second like a grandma on bingo night down at the old retirement home where-
Sirius getting annoyed pulled the keyboard from the author's clutches and banged her over the head with it.
OW!!!
"Stop ranting and start writing!"
Fine! Hmph! Moving on!
"Lily I don't think this is the time nor the place."
"Run!" James yelled. The five ran out of the isle and down to sporting goods. Sirius and James jumped on top of the shelves then helped the others up.
"You shouldn't have hurt the hamster, Padfoot." Remus warned flicking a parachuting hamster off his head.
"At least things can't get any worse." Sirius shivers then leans over the side of the shelf and gasps in horror.
"What?" James asked leaning over also. "Don't tell me, I know. It got worse." Five three eyed, one legged, mutant, neon yellow space chickens had gathered around the bottom of the isle.
"You just had to say it didn't you?" Lily snapped at Sirius.
"Let's offer Padfoot as a sacrifice and maybe it will go away." Peter suggested.
"Let's." The four smirked evilly at Sirius who started backing up.
"Now guys lets be reasonable. It wasn't my fault the author had a crush on me, [not that I blame her who couldn't?] and listens to my every thought. She was the one who typed it! Offer her!" Sirius pleaded.
Leave me out of this! Came a disembodied voice from above their heads.
"Um.... Ms. Author Lady?" asked Remus in a sweet calm voice.
Yes Moony? Said the voice again.
"I simply can't get over how beautiful you ah... sound today."
Aw, thank you.
"So er... may we please ask a favor from you?" Sirius questioned standing up next to Remus. They glanced back at the three behind him who were currently battling the three chicken things at a weird wizard duel.
Anything for you Sirius. Sirius smirked at Remus who rolled his eyes and went to help the others.
"Well, I, I mean we were wondering if you would be so kind as to get rid of the chickens?"
And you think you can handle the hamsters?
"Sure. Piece of cake!"
Okie- dokie. All of a sudden the chickens vanished and all that was left were several shocked muggles and some hamsters with army gear.
"Thanks!"
Anything else I can do?
"Nope we're good for now." James said dragging Sirius off the shelf.
After all had descended the shelves Lily rounded on Sirius.
"Since when were you and the author so well aquatinted?" She yelled glaring at him.
"She's just another one of my many fans."
JUST ANOTHER FAN?!
"Oh no." Muttered Remus covering his eyes with his hands.
I THOUGHT WHAT WE HAD WAS SPECIAL!!!!!
"Of course it was special...." Sirius said.
LIAR!!!!!!
"No I'm not!!!!"
"For the love of Peter don't lie Sirius!!!!" Cried the others, praying these weren't their last moments as fictional book characters.
Suddenly there was a cold wind that blew through the store. Spinning and whipping wild around the five, the wind began to form a giant spiral around Sirius. When the wind settled he was gone.
"WHERE'S SIRIUS?!" Yelled James.
Look up.
And the others did there hanging from was-
AH!!!!!!!!! A CLIFFY!!!!!! THEY STRIKE AGAIN!!!!!!!!!!