aberrant

Disclaimer: I do not own the series which I'm making a fanfic of.

A/N: I hope you made sure to check the tags. This IS a MayaXMiya fic. No corrections on that.

A/N: I've had this idea since I've read the LN the year before last, actually got to writing it last year, and just decided to upload it now after some tweaks. Some fic I was reading inspired me to write again, so here it is. Spoilers if you've only watched the anime.

"Therefore, before the memory of that rape could kill me, my elder sister killed me."

"Uh?!"

"That's what happened, right? A person is formed by their experiences. There is who I was, and there is who I am now."

Miya wanted to deny - to argue that while what she said wasn't false, it wasn't completely true either. But she couldn't as her sister continued.

"Experience being changed to mere knowledge means that my past has changed to data. All that was within me of who I was until yesterday has vanished except for the me that remains."

Her sister's gaze was piercing. To be stared so coldly by her beloved sister like that hurt.

"The me I was until yesterday has been killed by my own elder sister."

Maya had assumed her sister to leave her alone in the hospital room. She had all but wanted for that to happen, that's why she made sure to say those words. But instead of running for the doors after standing up, she felt first, before seeing, her sister wrap her arms around her in an embrace.

As the realization that her sister was hugging her finally came to her, she had felt her neck become wet - the sound and trembling affirming that her sister was indeed crying.

But why? Was it because she had hurt her with the words she had said? She was about to ponder on the reason when Miya spoke in between sobs.

"I'm...sorry."

Maya wanted to reject the apology - there was no use to it now. Whether she was sorry or not wouldn't change the fact of what happened. She voiced her thoughts out, and she felt the embrace tighten, as her sister continued to sob.

After a few moments passed, her sister's sobbing had calmed down considerably, but the embrace had not loosened a bit. As she was to push her sister away from her, Miya continued.

"I didn't know what else to do." A sob uncontrollably escaped, despite trying to calm herself down to continue talking.

"It hurt. The person I treasured the most was kidnapped to who knows where, and was done with things who knows what, and I couldn't do anything."

Maya listened to her sister ramble on of what happened. "Then she comes back and I have to turn her experience into data, or my beloved sister would die."

As if the mention of her sister's possible death had triggered Miya to clear her mind, her sobbing had completely stopped, and she pulled back to look at Maya with a look so far from what Maya had assumed she should have.

"I'm sorry. For not having done more. I should've tried to escape and find you the moment I found out that you were taken."

Maya was surprised. Her sister wasn't apologizing for killing her? She was confused, and she had loathed her sister for what she had done, but now, she was starting to get angry at her.

Already predicting the line of thought her sister has, Miya spoke before her sister could - wanting to clarify everything first before her sister let out her conclusion.

"I'm not sorry for killing the you whose horrible experiences I didn't know of. The you whose experiences nobody would've wanted. The you who was abused, whose spirit was all but destroyed. I don't want that you!" The sudden outburst surprising Maya enough to lower her budding anger.

"If that you had to be killed together with the experiences you had, then I would do so every time!" She stared at her sister, her right hand moving from Maya's shoulder to cup her cheek.

"If you ever have doubts on the past you - the you that wasn't tainted, then I'll forever be with you to tell you that they were real. So please don't think that I've completely killed the past you. The past Maya still lives with everyone - with me. The Maya that I dearly love, that shouldn't have died."

The room was filled with silence. Miya had already said her piece, and would've probably said more but she didn't want to overload her sister with various reasons - they'd just sound like excuses. She had already said what was most important. It was now up to Maya whether or not to see her reasoning and accept her offer. And it wasn't just because of what happened that she offered that. Even if this...incident had not happened, she would've still stayed with her sister.

The room continued to be filled with silence. Miya had retracted her hold from her sister in favor of letting her know that she wasn't forcing her on anything. Miya had explained her side not to excuse herself from the guilt of having killed who Maya was, but to let her know that, despite of what happened, Miya was there for her. That she wasn't alone in all this.

Assuming that Maya didn't care for Miya's reason, Miya stood to give her sister some space, when her shirt was tugged weakly.

"You'll...stay with me, forever?"

That was the only thing she needed to hear.

After the kidnapping incident in the year 2062, Miya had remained true to her word and never left Maya's side. There wasn't much change to their lives because of it though. Prior to the incident, the two had been very close, and with Miya's confession, the sisterly love the two had for each other had only developed further into something more. But it wasn't immediate.

Despite Miya's words of affection, Maya had still doubted her sister in the beginning. Fear of simply being told what she wanted to hear and left alone afterwards, had surfaced to her mind and caused her to act coldly. It had only been because of Miya's continuous assurance that she truly loved her sister that had her warm up to her.

Once, Maya had admitted that although her experiences were turned into knowledge, she'd still flinch from her sister's touches - especially when they resemble how she had been touched during her kidnapping. And it was the pain in Miya's eyes when she had opened this to her that made her know that what Miya promised her back in the hospital room was true, sincere, and would never be broken.

"The world may turn against us, but I will always be with you."

Having seen the effects of this relationship for both his nieces, the current clan head - Yotsuba Eisaku had forbidden the whole of the Yotsuba clan from interfering with their relationship. Not that he needed to. He assumed that had anyone said something about it, they'd be sent running away, if they were even able to run away then. Besides, nobody in the Yotsuba was stupid enough to actually say anything against the Yotsuba twins.

Even so, having rumors around the candidates for the next clan head wasn't a good showing of status, so he had to clear things up. It was his duty as clan head, so on a random day, he had asked the two to confirm or deny the rumors surrounding the siblings, and Miya had argued vehemently that he had no choice but to support it - not that he was against it in the first place.

"Why must we follow the morality of old? Homosexuality? Incest? We're magicians! We have done things far worse, and yet we can't be together because we're both girls? Because we're sisters? Not being able to produce an heir? Ridiculous."

And that was really what the elders were truly and only concerned with - producing an heir. Being the children of the previous clan head, one of the siblings was next in ascension. If they were together, and assuming that they stay together, they must produce an heir to proceed them.

The answer they had presented wasn't an all out secret. So much so that it was actually the elders who proposed they proceed with it. Genetic engineering had already been practiced long before modern magic was developed, so they weren't ignorant of the practice, but to actually agree to having it done - they had no further complaints.

About a decade of further researching the safest and most successful way of giving them a child from both their cells - because they wouldn't accept receiving from anyone else, and the two were going to go through with it. Without debate, it was Miya who was going to be carrying the child, and it was a no-brainer why.

Their first try was successful - the Yotsuba didn't spare any resources on making it so. Combining technological advancement and modern magic, Yotsuba Tatsuya, their son, was born with the highest hopes for being a miracle.

The child was discovered to have immense magical power. This in itself wasn't a problem for the Yotsuba, however, further analysis through the clan head's magic had the branch heads knowing that he could bring danger, and so a notion to have him killed was made. Feeling as if it was his fault for the suggestion, he had strongly suggested that they instead raise him to be the perfect warrior - to be the Yotsuba family's trump card.

As soon as Tatsuya was able to walk, his body was optimized to maximize the results of the training he was to receive. Day after day, Tatsuya was made to undergo hellish training - a training regime a young child shouldn't undergo. Miya and Maya could only endure the suffering their beloved child was receiving. It was either this or death.

Helpless, they could only explain it to their child. Thankfully, Tatsuya was intellectually gifted and was able to understand. It hurt, it was painful, but he could see that his mothers were pained just as he was, maybe more.

Once, he had overheard them having an argument about him that led him to soldier on - for them.

"I could turn everything in his training into knowledge, just like-"

"I won't allow it." Maya had rebutted - cutting off Miya's words.

"But!- If it could ease his mind, help him rest...even just a little bit."

"Even so."

The continuous short answers from Maya had Miya irritated. Was her magic being doubted? She couldn't help but wonder why she was being rejected - without being given a proper reason. "I've already improved. I was able to return to you everything that wasn't from that incident. I can now specify what to change."

"It's not that!" The sudden outburst had Miya flinching back. Maya's stern gaze had softened as she directed her eyes towards Miya. "I know what your magic does to you...I don't want that for us - me, you and Tatsuya."

The admittance -or was it a confession- had the conversation stopping into silence. Their gazes towards each other hadn't broken, and for a moment, one would assume that they were having an internal conversation.

"Please." Maya had uttered, breaking the quiet spell.

As if pondering her plea, Miya had started nearing Maya, and defeatedly rested her head on her shoulder, tilting her head towards the crook of her neck. "But Tatsuya...he…"

In response, Maya had wrapped her arms around her wife in a comforting embrace. "Tatsuya's a smart boy. I'm sure he'd understand. We'd just have to explain it to him."

The tears he saw on his mothers' faces had him vowing that he would be strong enough to protect them from ever having those pained expressions again.

Contrary to what he had overheard, the explanation came to Tatsuya years later - when he was officially told to be the next head of the Yotsuba family. Maya had called for her son to the main house for the New Year's. After meeting all the clan head candidates, Maya had told Tatsuya to stay - soon after heading to a room where Miya was waiting.

In the room, Maya and Miya had explained to Tatsuya everything that had to do with his birth - the Sin of the Yotsuba, the Artificial Magician Experiment, and their plans for him. He was re-told how his birth came to be - Maya's kidnapping, Miya's mind interference on Maya, Miya and Maya being together, and the proposal to have a genetically engineered child.

"Despite the revenge of the Yotsuba on the Great Asian Alliance in 2062, everyone in uncle's generation were still hoping for something to quench their anger towards them. No, in all actuality, they just wanted a fail-safe to prevent another incident like that."

While telling all this, Miya had been seated beside Maya -her arms around her waist in a side hug, her head leaning on her shoulders- in a public-familial display of affection, comfort, and support. Tatsuya simply watched them drily, but the humor in his eyes betrayed what he was showing.

"Everyone was guilt-ridden, and feared your power. They had assumed that it was because of their prayer that you turned out with such power. But they were mistaken. Because the ones who wished for your birth as a magician were me and your mother. Your magic was the key that would fulfill our wish."

Maya had leaned her head on Miya's, and took hold of her hand. The previous affection in her face sobered into guilt. And although Miya had her eyes closed, the tightening of her embrace told Tatsuya that she must feel the same.

"And we're sorry for that. At that moment, we had truly wanted the world destroyed - as revenge for taking away my past, future, and modest happiness as a woman in the most cruel way."

Tatsuya didn't voice any questions or comments - he simply waited for them to tell him everything he needed to know. He allowed the few seconds of silence his mothers had made, as if to catch their breaths and calm their minds - the loosening of the embrace, and softening of their faces had told him that.

"But when they had told us that they wanted you killed, all of that disappeared. Although almost everything was taken away from me, Miya never left my side, and gave me a gift in the form of you. The life of darkness and revenge we had wanted for you vanished and was replaced with simply wanting you not to experience any of that. And to achieve that, we allowed uncle to train you into the perfect combat magician for the Yotsuba. We wanted you to be able to face any enemy with ease. And you suffered because of that."

"But that wasn't even the worst of it." Miya had continued. They had decided beforehand that she would be the one to tell Tatsuya of this, so Maya was now the one leaning on Miya -in contrast to before- as Miya straightened her back.

"Shortly after uncle died, and Maya was made the head of the family, we- no, I restructured your mind. As I'm sure you know, it was to allow you to be able to use normal magic. But that's not the whole truth. The Artificial Magician Experiment was really to keep your magic in check from running out of control because of an outburst from an emotional influence. Though we did not want you to act on our revenge anymore, we weren't sure what that influence could make you do, so we sealed some of your emotions."

At this, Tatsuya had a reaction. His eyes had widened, back straightened, and was now leaning a bit forward on the chair he was seated. The question he wanted to ask leaking out from his entire body. Miya readily answered.

"Contrary to what everyone else believed, we didn't really remove your emotions to make room for an Artificial Magic Calculation Area. The mind hasn't been and still isn't completely explored and understood. It's also not so small that you'd need to remove all that just to create an area for calculating magic. I simply created another area for magic calculation."

"Nobody in the family could argue that I was lying, since nobody else knew in the first place. We're the only ones who know of this."

That night, Tatsuya didn't leave his mothers' rooms. As they had agreed, Miya had removed the seal on his emotions after their explanation, only helped by Tatsuya's statement.

"I will not waste the life given to me from the sacrifices made by my mothers."

It wasn't explicitly said, but Maya and Miya understood the message he wanted to send - that destroying the world now was the same as betraying his mothers, as it was not what they would've wanted him to become - a demon, the world's destroyer. Because in his life were the hopes, dreams, and ambitions of Yotsuba Maya and Miya, and it was his turn to give to them something back.

A/N: So what do you guys think? My proofreader/beta/whatever-she-actually-is-in-my-life said that it's not really like my usual, but I didn't want to simply let this go to waste. Anyway, thanks for reading!