Crush, an icarly fanfic

Crush
By David Archuleta

Sam's POV

Yet another stupid dance. Why is it that whenever the school thinks we need to socialize more, they think the cure is to herd us all into the gym like a bunch of barn animals and make us drink punch and dance in uncomfortable shoes for 3 hours? I hate being in school during the day. Must I really come back here at night and suffer even more?

Sorry if I seem even more obnoxious than usual. I just recently came to a rude awakening that I'm terrified of. I realized that… well, it seems that perhaps… I may have a bit of a crush on a certain technical stooge.

I know, right? It's so weird! And yet it happened! It seems like there should be a sign, like the one at the front of amusement park rides. "You must be this unnubby for Sam Puckett to find you suitable as a boyfriend." Clearly Benson would be so far under the line. He's such a nub! And yet…

I know it's strange, but according to Carly, it's been a long time coming. Naturally, I'm blaming him for getting all strong and tall and defensive… and hot…

GAH! What am I thinking? I must be on drugs or something.

Well, all I can hope is that this will go away. It's just a crush. It doesn't mean anything. It'll get over whatever illness I must be suffering from and he'll go back to being the stupid nub he always was.

But at the same time… things have changed between us. He's not just someone I have to work with for Carly's sake. We're actually… friends now. I talk to him on the phone regularly, sometimes not even for a reason; we'll just call one another to say hi. We sometimes hang out outside of school or iCarly without Carly. We've been to the movies together. We go over to each other's houses. We go to Groovy Smoothie together a lot. It used to be because he bought me smoothies, but now I go for the free smoothie and for his company.

It's disgusting how much I enjoy spending time with him. And now that enjoyment has turned into a yearning for more. I want to go to the movies with him and he'll want to put his arm around me willingly. I want him to buy me a smoothie not because he's nice, but because that's what a boyfriend does for their girlfriend. I want to end our phone conversations with us saying "I love you."

So you see, it's quite the conundrum. I supposedly hated this guy for years, and now I'm suddenly in love with him. It's a serious problem. All I can hope is that this feeling will go away.

Anyways, back to my original topic: the dance. I'm peeved enough because of my big problem, and now I'm being dragged to this dumb dance just because Carly wants to go. And stupid nubby Freddie is gonna be there too and I've been doing my best to avoid him at all costs since I came to my realization a week ago.

The only times I've had to see him was at iCarly rehearsals and even then I avoided talking to him, and as soon as it was done, I left.

That stupid dance is tonight and now I'm gonna have to face him and pretend like I still find it annoying when he speaks. Although I must admit, sometimes it is annoying, but only because I wish those lips were doing something else besides talking about stupid geeky stuff… Argh! Those are the bad thoughts that I need to stop.

He called me for the fifth time this week last night and for the first time left a message. Normally if he gets my voicemail, he'll just call me back later, but I guess he realized I was screening his calls and he left me a message.

"Hey, Sam. It's Freddie, just calling you for the umpteenth time this week. I don't know what I did wrong, but if I made you mad or offended you in any way, I'm really sorry. I just want you to talk to me again. Please call me back. Miss you."

Stupid dork… Of course he automatically assumes it's something he did. He must just assume that my entire life revolves around him and that if I'm mad at him, it's because he did something and not because I'm messed up in the head. Grr… I need a fatcake.

###

Carly made me wear a stupid blue dress with horribly uncomfortable white high heels, so now I'm even more annoyed. And the worst part is that I look good, so I don't even have the right to complain about it.

So here I am, standing awkwardly with Carly, Wendy, and a few other girls we know from school. They're all talking and gossiping, and I just want to leave.

And out of the corner of my eye, I see him coming over to us. Fredlumps Benson, looking amazing in a collared maroon shirt with formal dark blue jeans and a black tie. Why does he have walk over here and ruin my perfectly terrible time? Now I might actually enjoy myself because I'll get to look at him.

He says hi to all the girls, skillfully ignoring the flirtatious eyelash-batting from Wendy's friends, and touches my arm. "Can I talk to you?" he asks quietly.

I'm about to refuse when Carly pushes me along with him, throwing me off balance and allowing him to drag me with him. I turn to give her an evil glare, but she just smirks and goes back to her conversation with Wendy.

He takes me a few feet away where nobody's dancing and tries to get me to tell him what's wrong. I tell him everything's fine, but I avoid his eyes at all costs, because I know if I look into those gorgeous brown eyes, it'll all be over. I'll do something stupid and I'll never be able to talk to him again or go to school or do anything social. I'll be humiliated and I'll have to hide under my covers for the rest of eternity.

A song starts over the stereo and I immediately recognize it as a David Archuleta song. He'd hit it big ever since winning that competition show that Carly and I helped get him votes for, and this was easily his biggest song.

I hung up the phone tonight.
Something happened for the first time.
Deep Inside
It was a rush. What a rush.
Cuz the possibility
That you could ever feel the same way about me
Is just too much, just too much.

I get small goosebumps. I love this song, and it's so romantic, and here I am standing with the guy of my dreams, trying to make it seem like I'm totally fine and not in love with him at all.

Why do I keep running from the truth?
All I ever think about is you.
You've got me hypnotized,
So mesmerized
And I just got to know…

He touches my arm again and shakes me gently, because I've frozen in fear of the awkward situation I'm in. I feel electricity as he touches my arm, and I know that I need to get away from him before I do something really dumb. I shake his hand off without another word and walk back in the direction of the girls.

Do you ever think
When you're all alone
All that we could be?
Where this thing could go?
Am I crazy or falling in love?
Is it real or just another crush?
Do you catch your breath when I look at you?
Are you holding back
Like the way I do?
Cuz I try and try to walk away,
But I know this crush ain't going away.

I stop walking halfway through the chorus, knowing how much this song identifies my relationship with Freddie. Carly gives me a strange look and mouths some words to me, asking if I'm okay. I nod and turn to walk back to Freddie. I have to tell him.

I stop in front of him as the second stanza begins and he gives me a concerned look. As soon as I see those eyes, I know my heart is gone. David's right; this crush ain't going away.

Has it ever crossed your mind
When we're hanging, spending time, girl,
Are we just friends?
Is there more? Is there more?
See it's a chance we've gotta take
Cuz I believe that we can make this into
Something that'll last, last forever, forever…

"I can't be just friends with you, Freddie," I tell him flat out. We're not loud enough that anyone can hear us and I'm appreciative for that.

His eyes look sad. "You don't want to be my friend anymore?

I shake my head. "Trust me, I want to be your friend, and I wish that was all I felt for you, but I like you."

His eyes open a little wider. "Do you mean…"

The bridge starts again and I nod and continue.

"I want more. And I know that you can have your choice of any girl because you're gorgeous and super sweet and any girl would be lucky to have you, but I like you and I want you and-"

Why do I keep running from the truth?
All I ever think about is you.
You've got me hypnotized,
So mesmerized,
And I just got to know…

He interrupts me in the middle of my sentence by grabbing my face and pushing his lips to mine. I'm shocked, but I suddenly realize my dream has come true and I put my arms around his neck as his hands move down to my waist to hold me closer to him.

We pull away, only to hear Carly, Wendy, and a bunch of other people hooting, hollering, and clapping. I laugh and look down, touching my lips, embarrassed that everyone saw, and I feel my face get warm. I look back to him and smile, seeing his blush spread across his cheeks as well. He grins at me and puts his arm around my waist before whispering in my ear, "Let's blow this joint." We leave, avoiding eye contact with anyone else, but I glance at Carly, only to see her grinning wider than I've ever seen before.

I guess dances can have their good moments.