Disclaimer: Don't own.
Title: Sweet And Simple Utterings
Rating: T
Genre: Romance/Angst
Pairing: Darcy/Loki
Summary: Her name is Darcy Lewis, and she shuffles around the lab more than she walks, drops her pen more times than she writes with it. He is intrigued by her, not because her curls are soft and frame her face, and because she looks endearing when she pushes her glasses back up her nose. No, he is intrigued by those things later
Note: I'm taking huge creative liberties with what happens at the end of Thor 2. Without an actual explanation for Odin's lack of appearance, I've had to make do with what my poor mind can salvage.
Despite what many people thought, despite what he thought—what he believed—Loki's feelings for Thor went beyond hatred and deep bitterness. Disguised as the All-Father, he found himself often asking about his brother's wellbeing on Midgard, which Heimdall did not investigate nor question. It was all for pretenses, he told himself. So it did not garner suspicion that the God of Thunder's father did not care. But there was no explanation for why he finally decided to go to Midgard himself. He used one of his many secret passage ways, and teleporting to the Stark Tower where he knows his brother resides, he goes by invisible.
He watches the Avengers interact with Thor. Anger and disgust bubbles within him whenever they laugh, whenever they smile. Whenever they share knowing looks amongst each other when discussing the ulterior motives of the likes of Nick Fury and Phil Coulson, who he could have sworn he killed long ago but clearly didn't do a good job of. They're intelligent enough, he thinks, to distinguish between who to trust and who to be weary of. Jane Foster comes sometimes, and she makes him smile too, makes him laugh. It sparks a jealousy within him that Loki believed to be long dormant, and dismisses it instantly. He is not so bored as to watch his brother and his woman make love, but he listens to their conversations in the aftermath. Because more often than not, Thor speaks of him.
'I miss him.' His brother says.
'He was your brother. You will always miss him,' Jane murmurs.
'Sometimes I wish he could be here. I do not wish for things to go back to the way they were, because I know he hated every moment of it. But I wish he could be here now so that we could start over.'
It's a confession made only in the darkness, because speaking of Loki amongst the Avengers was a taboo. No matter his sacrifice for the realms, he would always remain as the villain who attempted to enslave their world, make servants of their people. Sometimes he listens to the conversations on nights where the Avengers are sitting and drinking, sharing stories of childhood and humorous experiences, and while Thor shares stories of Sif and the Warrior Three, he refrains from mentioning Loki, and Loki could see. He could see because whenever one of the members mention something familiar, he feels a tug in his memory of his childhood with his brother, where a similar event occurred, and he could see in Thor's eyes the recognition as well. Loki knows they remember the same memory. And yet, Thor does not speak of it.
He could travel beyond the Stark Tower, and he does. Sometimes to SHIELD headquarters, but only because Thor works there as well. He feels no desire to go further. It's odd, he thinks, because this was the realm he had wished so keenly to conquer, to become the king of. And yet, the desire for power over the weak and simple mortals seems to have long since subsided. Being the king of Asgard, even under the guise of his fath—Odin—is enough.
It is one day, when he cannot find Thor in the Stark Tower and knows him to be with SHIELD, that he explores the headquarters as he searches for him. But it is a day filled with twisted fate. Because he looks for Thor and finds him with Jane Foster, who works for Fury and who has an intern who works for her. A lab assistant he knows Thor is familiar with because they share banter and jokes that he cannot understand. Her name is Darcy Lewis, and she shuffles around the lab more than she walks, drops her pen more times than she writes with it. He is intrigued by her, not because her curls are luscious and frame her face, and because she looks endearing when she pushes her glasses back up her nose. No, he is intrigued by those things later. At first, it is her snarky way of speech, filled with unfamiliar words he guesses to be culturally exclusive to the Midgardians. It is the way she moves her limbs, the way her eyes glaze over whenever Jane Foster falls into a long explanation of some scientific revelation she has made. But most of all, he is intrigued by the way her head turns slightly to where he is standing, and her brows pinch together in confusion. There is no way she could see him, so he is not concerned, but he finds himself curious.
That day, instead of following Thor back to the Stark Tower where Jane also goes, he follows Darcy back to her apartment she shares with the astrophysicist. She groans as she throws herself onto the couch as soon as she steps over the threshold, and reaches for a device that turns on a black box across her. Pictures come to life, and he recognises it as a television—a contraption he became familiar with when his face was featured all over it during his attempt to take over the world.
But she is not completely comfortable as she watches the screen. No. She is paying subtle attention to her side, where he hovers, watching her. But she does not say a word.
-X-
Thor shares his innermost thoughts with his lover, and while Loki finds his sopping recalling of memories worthy of many eye rolls, he cannot deny the tug of his soul. As though responding to him, reaching out to him.
Sometimes, Thor tenses when he is around, as though suddenly aware of Loki's presence. But all it takes is a hand on his arm from Jane, a demand of attention from Fury and it is gone. Loki is almost disappointed when it happens, which is odd because all he needs to do is unveil the magic cloaking him to reveal himself to his brother. He pushes the desire away, not by returning back to Asgard, but by finding Darcy. She is in Jane Foster's lab, as she always seems to be, and is distracted with flipping her pen and attempting to catch it. A curl of hair falls into her face, and she unsuccessfully blows at it.
He shifts closer, standing near her desk, and that is when she tenses once more. Her eyes are still, her hands stiff as she puts the pen down. Her breathing is slow, and Loki almost believes she sees him because she is looking right at his face, but when he steps to the side, finds that her gaze follows over his shoulder. Such a curious creature, he thinks. There is a full minute of silence before she sighs in dismay and turns to the device on her desk, clicks a few buttons, and then stands to walk towards the photocopier where she calmly waits for papers to be printed. But she cannot fool him. She senses his presence, and it thrills him to the bone.
When he leaves, he returns. Again. And again, and again.
He finds that in time, when he rarely ever follows his brother back to the Stark Tower anymore, when on his visits to Midgard he visits her first, that he cannot stop.
-X-
'I know you're there,' she murmurs one day. She is washing dishes in her apartment, Jane away on a date with Thor. 'I can't see you, but I can sense you.' She stops, turning a little and leaning her soapy hands against the sink. 'And I think I know who you are.'
And that is when, he knows, he has to stop.
-X-
He does not return to Midgard for three months. Being king of a realm is enough to keep him busy, he tells himself. He can simply ask Heimdall about Thor's wellbeing, he thinks. There is no need to go back. But in the months he is away, he finds himself incomplete, as though a part of his being was left behind on the lowly realm. He never realized that he was missing the freedom that came with hope, happiness and content, and now that he had experienced it, he misses it.
It is one day, when he is in a secluded part of the palace gardens, watching the fish dart through the pond that he hears a couple, some distance from him. Quickly disguising himself in Odin's form, he listens out. A woman, most likely a servant of the court, was giggling, her laughter coming out as a melodious symphony. 'I know you're there.' She says. The words resound in his mind, echoing into his deepest memories. There is a sudden shriek of joy as Loki watches through the grapevine a guard tackle the woman from behind, his arms coming around her middle protectively. She laughs again as the man grins down at her. 'Such acute senses,' he teases, and the moment is so tender, Loki has to look away. But even as he departs, making his way back to his chambers, the woman's words have not left him.
-X-
'You're back,' she sounds relieved. Darcy Lewis sounds relieved that he is back in her living room. Entirely cloaked from her, but there. 'I thought I scared you off forever and I've been kicking myself since that day because I was a total idiot and I shouldn't have mentioned it because obviously if you wanted to make yourself known you would have done that,' she flushes, shifting her weight from one foot to the other. 'I'm sorry, I'm rambling, and I probably sound crazy, but...it's good to have you back.'
His heart is pounding as he nears her. Reaching out a hand, he lets his fingers ghost over her cheeks. She turns her face into his palm and it makes contact, like a blurry connection. She feels it, senses his cold skin.
Loki is stunned, unable to move, but does not need to, because she moves away first, clearing her throat. 'I'm sorry, that was rash.' She turns away and goes to her room, murmuring a quiet, 'I shouldn't have done that,' as she disappears down the hall.
His hand is warm where he touched her, as though fire is running through his veins, and Loki feels light.
-X-
'Aren't you going to tell Thor?' She asks one day. They are alone in the lab, and she is glancing in his direction, unable to find where his face is to stare into. 'I mean, he can't stop talking about you, and it's obvious he misses you like hell, you know? You're brothers. Shouldn't you at least let him know you're alive?'
Loki ponders over the question, unable to think of an answer, and then remembers that he has yet to speak one word to her. He didn't want to start now. Not only that, but he didn't want his first words to her be about his brother, of all things. It then occurs to him that in his mind, he looks forward to what he will tell her when he finally decides to show himself physically. Funny he hadn't consulted himself on that decision beforehand.
-X-
'Darcy's been different lately,' Jane says to Thor one day as they dine in a private room at Stark Tower.
'How so?' his brother asks.
'I don't know. Happier, I guess. Livelier. More enthusiastic while working,' she laughs. 'It's almost like she's in love.'
Thor beams. 'And perhaps she is. Lady Darcy should also revel in the happiness that comes with love. She is most worthy and any man whom she chooses is most fortuitous to have been blessed with her affections.'
'Oh really?' Jane raises a brow, and even Loki sees the sudden surge of jealousy in the woman's eyes.
But his brother is not as daft as he originally thought, because Thor grins and adds, 'Indeed. The same way I am fortunate to have been blessed with yours.'
-X-
Rule over Asgard has lost its meaning, and whenever he isn't busy parading as Odin and making decisions that ought to be made by kings, Loki is on Midgard, in Darcy's apartment. And she knows, because she speaks to him. Converses with him as though he responds to her daily conversations.
'And Steve is hot and all,' she raves as she packs the mess she has made in the lounge room, 'but just not for me, you know? And I know he just sees his old love in me, and that's why he's expressing interest.' He finds her words amusing, as though trying to get a rise out of him. Especially when she drops a plush pillow against the couch and turns to his direction. 'Besides, from what I know, you are much more attractive.'
It has him surprised, warmth running through him as she steps forward. Her curls fall back into her face, and she tucks them behind her ear. And the curve of her hips as she walks, the way her hand reaches out, awakens his lust.
'Won't you ever show yourself to me?' She asks lightly, but he could hear the strain in her undertone. 'I mean, it's been months and I feel like it's getting odd because you know everything about me but there is very little I know about you.' She reconsiders. 'Well, except what Thor tells me, which, trust me, he tells a lot since he has many stories to share.'
She is close now, dangerously close, and the nearness of her body to his ignites something in him so deep, he feels it in his bones.
'What I'm trying to say,' Darcy tries again, clearly uncomfortable, 'is that I would really appreciate it if I could see you. It would be much easier to go out on a date if other people know I have a companion and am not rambling to myself over a fancy dinner,' she laughs, but it is all he needs.
In an instant, his removes the invisibility spell, and she only has a moment to make eye contact with him before he pulls her forward into his arms and turns around, pushing her against the wall behind him. His lips cover hers and the sigh of content she breathes against his mouth drives him insane. Clutching her tightly, he kisses her with all the pent up emotion he's felt since he met her. Blood hums in his ears as her hands come up to entangle in his hair, clutching and scraping against his scalp.
It is a moment of emancipation because Loki has never felt more free in his life than he is now, with this woman in his arms. He never wants to leave, and as he trails kisses down her jaw and along the column of her neck, he vows to himself he never will.
That's all folks! Let me know what you guys think and how you felt about it. Love getting feedback on fics haha.
xx