in Twilight
Jacob : my dad told me to tell you that we'll be watching you !
bella : are you and your dad like pedo's or something * slap * * bella slaps jacob*
* when edward comes back over *
edward: oooohhhh , bitchy !!
bella : * clenching fists * do you want a slap aswell!
Edward : * wimpering * n-n-n-no . *crying*
year later when bella is a vampire . * edward , bella , emmett , alice , jasper. wearing same skirt that she was wearing for the second time ever . ( first time vampire)
Bella : * crying *
edward : whats up babe ,why you crying .
bella : something hads just exploded up my FRIGGIN SKIRT !
emmett: ewwww!! ooh was it a bannana !!! i like bannanas . yummy
edward : ewww emmett you dirty git .
Bella:* looking under skirt * i-i-i-ttts a friggin camera !! ewww ! JACOB , WAS SPYING ON ME :( * crying *
edward: that little mutt is gonna die . * spins round a black cape flies onto his back . * ha ha ha ha . i am the REVENGER . MWAHAHAHAHA!
bella: whats wid the cape , and the mwahahahahaha! thing .................
Alice , Rosalie , Bella and renesme!
Alice: bella you betta come and see what you daughter has done to herself.
bella: what she done , made herself look like a litt......... shit !! NESSIE WHAT HAVE YOU DONE TO YOUSELF !!
alice : new she was gonna be shocked
rosalie : ooh the bitch is swearing in front of her daughter ! she's only painted herself blue !
bella: she painted herself BLUE !! ewww omg . My nails are gonna get chipped . i had them done silver palm . $ 155 dollars . aren't they fab .
rosalie : oohh . get on with it . * taking mic out of bella* aarrh my nails ! i chipped them . Edward take me to the hospital NOW! hahaha
bella: okay , i put cloves on . O . ... M.....G
cleaning blue of nessie * alice , bella
Bella : Alice .......
alice : yeah bella !
bella: ......................the ........blue wont come off ..........................
alice : okay ! i have an idea . we rub ........................ we rub mayo on her . it might help
bella: ookay .
* alice quickly gets the mayonasse*
bella: *singing* rubber dubber dubber , i am using a scrubber and im rubbin all the blue away................ arrrhhhh!!!!
alice : STOP SCREAMING !!
bella: you stupid cow , the mayo has made her more blue !!!!! arrrrrhhhhhh
*emmett walks in *
emmett : * roaring in laughter * hahhahahahahahaha i that that alien from that film wats it called ...........monsters vs aliens hahahaha . * brings his phone out and pictures it .
vampire/werewolf bigbrother
billy black : this is big brother ,please do not bite you are live on blook sucker tv .
edward : I SUCK YA BLOOD !! * looking at bella *
billy : edward
edward : woooooooooohhhh p-p-party !!
billy: bella
bella: * looking tippsy * w-w-wat , s-s-stop s-s-ayin meeeeeeeee name !!
billy: and rosalie ,
rosalie : stupid bitches
billy: the vote have been count and verifid and the 1st person to be evicted is .........................................
bella : fuckin hurri uuuuuuuuuupppppp !
*10 years later *
billy: iiissssssss ...edward
bella : arrrrrhhhhhhh . *cry* edward , your not evicted , you stay right here , your mine .
emmett : don't worry edward , i'll look after Bella for you . * raising eye brows up and down*
rosalie : No , he won't or i'll suck ya blood .
jacob : then i'll ripp you into kibbels for me and sam to eat . mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmh rosalie kibbles !! YUMMY .
emmett : jacob , i'll - i'll slicce you into ............................. mmmmmmh Bananas
Twilight christmas song
on the first day of vampire christmas my true love said to me
we doont need to eat our human tea
on the second of vampire chirstmas my true love said to me
we are super cold
and we dont need to eat our human tea
on the third day of vampire christmas my true love said to me
we are super strong
we are super cold
and we dont need to eat our human tea
on the forth day of vampire christmas my true love said to me
bella has a sheild
we are super strong
we are super cold
and we dont eat are human tea
on the fifth day of vampire christmas my true love said to me
eeeddward reeeaads yoooour mind
bella has a shield
we are super strong
we are super cold
and we dont eat are human tea
* jump to the 12th day of x-mas*
on the 12th day of vampire chirstmas my true love said to me
carlisle is a doctor
he is very old
esme is his young looking old wife
emmett likes rosalie
rosalie is a bitch
jasper controls emotions
sleeping really sucks!
eeedddwaaarrrd reaaaads yooouuur miiinnnddddd
bella has a shield
we are super strong
we are super cold
and we don't eat are human tea