Disclaimer: It's not mine. The poem was based off of "'Twas the Night Before Christmas", and the rest is based off of Rawling's stuff.
'Twas the Night Before O.W.L.s
'Twas the night before O.W.L.s and all through the school
All the fifth years were striving to try to stay cool.
But in their own dorms they all studied with care-
Which means they all listlessly stared their blank stares.
The fortunate sixth years all laughed from their beds,
Gave faulty advice, and then messed with their heads.
In the Gryffindor guys' room, James Potter could nap.
Exams, he was certain, would all be a snap.
Then 'cross the room there arose such a splatter
That he rolled off his bed, causing glasses to shatter.
He was borne to the Med. Wing in naught but a flash
For his eyes, by the glass shards, were impaled in the crash.
In truth, though, his tantrums worried Padfoot much more
Then poor Prongs's pain, which he chose to ignore.
When, what to their poor (damaged) eyes should appear,
But Severus Snape, and his typical sneer.
The Slytherins got news remarkably quick,
And sent their foul envoy with greasy hair slick.
More rapid than phoenixes Severus came,
And he whistled, and cat-called, and called them all names.
"You Gryffindor traitor and Gryffindor snob!
You Gryffindor half-blood and Gryffindor… uh… blob!
You think yourselves great, though you're all really small,
And some day you'll weep as my House conquers all!"
insert diabolical laugh
A cricket chirped somewhere, then decided to fly
And James, in his wonder, forgot his hurt eye.
Snape was out of his Slytherin mind, that they knew,
All four Marauders, and their little dog, too.
And then in a twinkling they heard past the door
The Headmaster's footsteps as he moved 'cross the floor.
He poked in his head and was peering around
When Snape ran right past him, to his dorm in a bound.
Albus, in purple, from his hat to his feet,
Inquired politely if there was something to eat.
A bundle of lemon drops swung from his back,
But he was not happy with only his pack.
His eyes- sugar glaz'ed and in his face sunken,
And his girth, which was wisely and magically shrunken.
The Gryffindors sadly reported a "no,"
And Albus departed, lethargic and slow.
The next Med. Wing guest made them laugh through their teeth,
For Hagrid's immense beard was done up like a wreath.
The birds nesting in it and on his round belly
Indignantly left as it jiggled like jelly.
The troop was completed by some jolly house elves,
And the boys wished they'd leave them alone to themselves.
A Hagrid-with sigh and a shake of the head
Quickly informed them they'd nothing to dread;
He spoke not a word as he went to his work,
Then he went out the door, which was slammed with a jerk.
At last, Madame Pomfrey, who was walking about,
Attended to Potter and shooed his friends out.
They arrived at their dorm, to which James returned after,
And was forced to be subject to merciless laughter.
Remus the Sensible, as he sensed a near fight,
Told them, "Just get some rest- after all, what a night!"