Author: hkpadfoot
Rating: PG [Probably G, I can't remember, too tired
Summary: He was exhausted. There was no other word for it. Remus Lupin was exhausted...
AN: Summary to Tea. Feedback is really really wanted. I'm not sure how I feel about this one.
Pumpkin Juice
He was exhausted. There was no other word for it. Remus Lupin was exhausted. Insisting on waiting for the train to bring him to Hogwarts rather than go early to spend the full moon and the day after with minimum hardships had to have been the worst mistake of his life. Leaning heavily against the stone wall he tapped the third stone to the right of the suit of armor and muttered his password, before slipping into his quarters.
Granted, what with the Dementors and Harry, it was probably a very good thing he got on the train.
But damn, he was exhausted; he hadn't even had time to get tea this morning before he had to rush to King's Cross.
He crossed the small sitting area, grabbing the mug of strong, black, hot enough to scald, coffee off the mantel, and into the small kitchenette, where he flopped down at the table.
It wasn't until after his eyes had rolled back, his bones melted, and he sighed that sigh that he realized what he had just done. Letting out an undignified shriek, Remus threw the mug down and jumped back, trembling.
It wasn't possible. It just couldn't be possible. There was no way that a dog could make it from his cottage to Hogwarts in just a month, was there?
"Elf!" he shouted, forgoing his usual niceties. A house elf appeared, wringing her hands. She saw the mess of the coffee and squeaked, rushing to clean it up.
"Tiki is sorry sir!" she cried "Tiki is only hearing the older elves talk about when sir was a student at Hogwarts taking his coffee for three days after the moon is full, sir!" she cried, cleaning up frantically. Remus sighed, though in relief or regret, he wasn't sure.
"That was very kind of you Tiki," he murmured quietly, sinking down into the chair.
"Does sir not drink coffee no more?" Tiki asked quietly. Remus shook his head.
"Not any longer."
"Tiki will bring sir something else. Tea, maybe?" Remus nodded and Tiki disappeared, taking the remains of the coffee cup with her. Remus rubbed his eyes with the palms of his hands and took several deep breaths, trying to calm down.
"He cannot harm you here," he muttered to himself quietly, picking up the mug of tea that wasn't hot or strong enough that suddenly appeared, and moving towards his bedroom.
The next moon brought coffee in the morning though. While the night hadn't been nearly as rough as it should've been thanks to the Wolfsbane potion, it was still painful no matter which way you looked at it. He sighed and stared at the mug of coffee.
You should tell Dumbledore everything, a voice hissed at him as his hand wrapped around the mug. And he would've, had Sirius not taken it upon himself to announce to the school his arrival by tearing the Fat Lady to pieces that night.
Remus stares at the canvas in shock, not caring that half the staff was standing nearby staring at him.
"Merlin," he whispers quietly, oblivious to the hand Dumbledore lays on his shoulder.
"Remus..." the older man murmurs a slight questioning tone to his voice. Remus shakes his head, pulling his hand away from the canvas.
"I don't know, I just don't know."
And he doesn't know, truly and honestly, because he made sure himself that no one would be able to get in through those secret passages they found as kids on the night of the full moon. As powerful as Severus' wolfsbane is he's not sure it can contain his overwhelming human desire to harm Sirius combined with the usual blood lust of the wolf.
He drinks more coffee then usual, not even registering that he ought to tell Dumbledore about his three day addiction being fulfilled, and winds up with a massive caffeine headache Wednesday morning as he stares at his bright eyed and bushy tailed Hufflepuff and Ravenclaw second years, forcing a pained smile back at them.
November passes by with no major incident as far as Sirius Black is concerned, and when December comes, Remus tries to ignore in vain the peppermint sticks in his coffee. Had Severus not happened by on New Years demanding details of how the new formula affected him, Remus could've convinced himself that he had never touched the sweets, and thus was never faced with the problem of his NEWT level papers stuck to his hands by peppermint. In January the coffee is welcomed as an aid against the bitter cold of the winter, and for a moment Remus wonders if Padfoot is cold, and if maybe he should leave a blanket outside on the grounds for him to find.
Later when he sees Harry in passing, looking so much like his father, yet radiating like his mother, he berates himself endlessly for pitying a monster.
Remus wakes up one morning in February with Albus staring at him.
"Last night—" the head master begins.
"I know, I…smelt him. I felt him. I know. Is Harry alive?" Remus asks quietly, curling into himself. Albus nods, not seeming surprised by Remus' admission.
"Alive and quite well," he answers, before recounting the entire event to Remus. Remus shudders violently.
"That doesn't make sense, why did he flee?" he asks quietly. Dumbledore shrugs.
"Your guess is as good as mine, my boy," he replies before leaving.
The next month, despite it being two weeks after his birthday, Remus' coffee is in an obnoxiously brightly colored mug that flashes words to remind him how old he was. Remus broke the first two mugs without question in rage, before finally allowing himself to partake in his secret pleasure, hating himself for it.
April and May fly by, each with three days of coffee, three days of bittersweet comfort.
On the tenth day of June, Remus Lupin wakes up in the Forbidden Forest, near the Shrieking Shack. Trembling, because he can't remember what he did while the wolf had him in it's clutches, he moves towards it, inside it, ignoring the disturbed dust, grabbing a pair of worn robes hidden their decades ago, and getting dressed. He moves towards the castle in a stupor, freezing and burning all at once, wondering if he had killed, wondering if Sirius is alive, if Peter is dead, wondering if Harry is okay.
The clock strikes six in the morning as he enters the Hospital Wing. Poppy is ushering him to a private chamber, Albus is called, he's being healed and he's warm, and he can't help but drift into unconsciousness for an hour.
When he wakes, the Headmaster is staring at him.
"Sirius…Sirius Black, he's innocent," Remus whispers. Albus nods.
"Mr. Potter said something similar. Unfortunately, as we could not find one Peter Pettigrew, Sirius Black is still a convict and must be dealt with accordingly."
"No Albus! Please—"
"Thus," interrupts the older wizard, "I hope that our dear friend will take extra care to disguise his…human…nature."
There's a twinkle in Albus' eye, and Remus sighs.
"I should've told you."
"And because you didn't, a boy has been able to reunite with a key to his missing past. In this instance, I shall not hold it against you. In other news," Albus continues, sitting back in chair, "It seems my Potion's Master was so terribly disappointed with his revoked Order of Merlin, and the fact that he was once against bested by those…I believe he called you 'Merlin be-damned Gryffindors'…that in his unstable mental state he let your own physical state slip to a few members of his house."
"You'll find my resignation in the top drawer of my desk in my office," Remus replies quietly, looking away. Albus nods.
"I feared you would say something like that. Well, my boy, if that'll be all…" he rises and takes his leave, replaced by Madame Pomfrey.
"Just a little while longer, dear, I want to check out a few bones. Can I get you something?" she asks. Remus, glances out the window.
"Coffee would be nice." She makes an odd clucking noise in the back of her throat before replying.
"I'll get you some pumpkin juice."
It's not coffee, or tea, but it quenches the burning thirst in throat, and he suspects it's probably much easier to get while on the run.