Criminal Minds

Adventures in the BAU

Smokinhottie

Summary: Some one-shot of the adventures that some of the people in the BAU have and end up with cuts bumps and bruises.

Author's Note: I'm writing a story for the BAU team and I need your help! I need any crazy stories of what happened while you were drunk. Please review this story and tell me of your drunken adventures! Thank you so much!

"My Shower Won't Drain"

Emily Prentiss walked swiftly to her desk in the bull pen of the BAU, keeping her head down as she scanned for her coworkers. She had tried earlier to use Maybelline to cover the massive bruise that shadowed her right eye. She knew if anyone asked how she got her prize winning shiner, she would be too embarrassed to tell the story. Just as she thought she had escaped to her desk, Derek Morgan walked by, on his way to the coffee maker and saw her.

"Morning Prentiss." He said casually as he approached her.

"Morning." She returned as she attempted to keep her head down. A frown creased his brow as he ducked his head to peer at her from behind her hair.

"Prentiss! What happened to your…" he said upon finding her secret, but was quickly interrupted.

"Morgan, I'm fine. It's no big deal! I'd rather not talk about it." She barked cutting him off. He nodded not wanting to push at the moment and carried on his way to get coffee.

Emily had successfully spent the rest of the morning at her desk not being bothered by anyone. The clueless Reid had dropped off a file to her and went back to his desk without saying anything. Other than that encounter she had put off any conversations until Penelope Garcia marched into the bull pen and practically ripped Emily's arm out of the socket in her attempt to get her out of her chair.

"Where are we going? Garcia!" She protested as Garcia dragged her back to her office. She didn't respond to any of Emily's protest until they were back in her office with the door shut.

"Garcia, what the hell is going on?" Emily said as she was all but thrown into a chair.

"Chocolate Adonis called my office this morning and informed me that there was something wrong with you and OMG! LOOK AT YOUR FACE! WHAT HAPPENED! WHO DID THIS TO YOU?" Garcia unloaded all in one breath. She gently cupped Emily's chin in her hand and examined her face.

"Is that what this is about? I'm all right…" She started as she tried to wiggle away from her friend but she wasn't having it.

"Tell me his name! I will find that low life and I will put him in a world of hurt!" Garcia continued in a low growl, completely ignoring her friend's protests.

"GARCIA!" Emily finally stood up and shouted. Garcia stopped and looked at her.

"I'm okay. It wasn't a man who did this. I did it to myself." She said calmly as she stood with her hands on each of Garcia's shoulders.

"No Emily you need to tell me his…what? You did this to yourself?" she said with confusion. Emily just nodded.

"Why? How?" Garcia rambled staring at her with utter disbelief. Emily sighed.

"It was an accident. I was taking a shower last night and saw that water wasn't draining from the tub. I figured I could fix it…or try to that is. So I'm bent over in the tub and jiggling the handle…"

"Oooo! Kinky! Is that what they are calling it these days?" Garcia interrupted with smile that rivaled the Cheshire cat. Emily shot her a dirty look before continuing.

"So I'm bent over in the tub and I'm jiggling the handle OF THE DRAIN." Emily said as she carried on with her story.

FLASHBACK

Emily looked at her tub as if she were in a showdown straight out of the old west. Her first attempt at fixing the problem had resulted in failure. Assuming the drain was clogged she had used a plunger to unclog it. This amounted to no success and neither did the DrainO. Now after bailing all of the water out of the tub with a Taco bell cup and emptying it into the toilet, she was bound and determined to fix the problem.

"Ok Drain you are going down!" She challenged as she carefully climbed into the tub. The drain was right below the spout and the handle to the drain. She examined the drain and gave the handle to it a jiggle. Nothing happened. Or so she could tell.

"Maybe we need water!" she said as she turned on the facet and let the water begin to flow into the tub. As she repositioned herself, knocked over the bar of soap on the ledge and it tumbled into the tub.

"Damn! Stupid soap!" She said as she tried to look for it in the confined space of the tub. Noticing that the water was filling the tub, instead of draining, she turned her attention back to the drain and it's handle. This time she jiggled hard. As she pulled up and down on the handle harder and harder, the handle finally broke off in her hand. As she fell forward from the force of her tug, her knee found that "stupid soap". The "stupid soap" now wet with water only helped propel her forward even more until her fall was stopped by her face thumping the faucet.

END FLASHBACK

"So… a bag of peas and some Tylenol later, my drain is still not fixed."

"Wow." Said Garcia quietly. Emily nodded sheepishly.

"Are you ok?" Garcia asked as she examined her friend's battle wounds again. This time Emily let her.

"I'm fine!" She said with a laugh. "The only thing hurt is my pride. I'm going to have to break down and call a plumber."

"I think you should!" Garcia said as she wrapped her friend a hug. "We don't need you damaging your pretty face up anymore!" Both shared a laugh as they walked back to the bull pen.

A couple of hours later and some explaining to Morgan, Emily found herself being called to a briefing on their newest case. JJ had walked by saying something about the case being promising as she hurried on to the conference room. On her way up the stairs, she saw Hotch standing in the doorway of the conference room talking to Rossi inside.

"I'll back in just a minute. I've got to get that file from my office." He said as he started down the hall.

"Hey." Emily said with a smile as she approached him. He gave her a half smile until she got closer.

"What happened to your face?" he said with a frown creasing his brow.

"Oh it's nothing!" She said with a light laugh as she moved to walk past him to the conference room. She was taken aback when she felt a hand gently grip her elbow and stop her.

"Hotch, I…" She said as she turned around and came face to face with him. One look in his eyes told her that the profiler in him was in full force as he searched her face for answers. Her heart softened as she saw all of the emotions playing out across face.

"Hotch. I'm fine. I had a silly little accident at the house last night. It's ok." She said softly as she stepped closer to him. He nodded and let go of her arm, but didn't walk away.

"Are you sure you are ok? What happened?" he asked barely above a whisper as he gently touched her chin while examining the bruises. Emily smiled even more surprised at his touch.

"Yes. I'm fine. I promise Hotch. I appreciate your concern. All I was doing was trying to fix my shower drain. The water wouldn't go down." She said as she watched him gradually relax. It stunned her that he would show that much concern for her. Not that he didn't care for her or worry what happened to her, but that he would actually show it. Something Aaron Hotchner wasn't known for doing.

"Not a problem. I'm glad that it was just a simple accident." Hotch said as he finally calmed down.

"Hotch. I would have come to you if it was anything serious. I just slipped and fell in the shower. I'm actually going to call a plumber after this meeting." She said with a smile confident that he was ok now.

"Don't." Hotch said with a shrug and Emily looked at him with a slight frown.

"I can fix your shower." He said in a matter of fact tone.