Disclaimer: Anything that you recognize belongs to J.K. Rowling.
A/N: There aren't any Sinistra/OCs?! Well I'll have to change that, but this one-shot contains femslash, though there isn't any lesbian porn on here. Just some mild cursing, so if you don't like it I don't suggest you read it. I suppose that this will be slightly AU because Tonks and Remus are alive and kicking at the end.
Summary: Sinistra fall has fallen in love and she almost would have perferred it was Snape than to the one person that she cannot have, a female student. Sinistra/OC, mild cursing.
Jaded Combatant
"I thought that I would find you up here tonight," Aurora Sinistra said as she approached one of her old students. The girl didn't even turn to look at her and wasn't at all worried about being caught at the Astronomy tower way past curfew. Aurora didn't blame her, after all she had always been particularly close to this student, closer than close really, and wouldn't even get her into trouble. "What happened?"
Bella Lunedi didn't turn to look at Professor Sinistra and continued to glare at the skies. Her dark green eyes were glaring up at the sky as her curly black hair fell down her back, nearly reaching down to the small of her back. "I don't want to talk about it Professor Sinistra," she responded simply.
Aurora watched the girl very closely. Bella was angry with the world and didn't trust anyone. As far as Aurora knew, she was the person Bella had gotten closest to. That's why it had surprised her so much that she suddenly stopped taking her class after her fifth year. After all, Bella had always shown a very great interest in the subject and had always gotten perfect scores in her class.
"I heard Professor Dumbledore is having you suspended for a week," Aurora prompted softly. The girl didn't respond, merely continued to glare up at the sky. In the seven years that Aurora had been at Hogwarts, she'd never even heard of Bella getting so much as a Detention. While she was sure that wasn't because she hadn't done anything to get into trouble, she was sure all the rules she'd broken without getting caught were nothing big.
However, now that she stared at the Slytherin girl before her, she wondered how she had changed in only two years. She wondered why she had pulled so far away from her, why she was closing herself off to her. Bella had always been willing to speak to her. She would willingly tell her things and offer up pieces of herself without having to provoke her.
She guessed that two years without having much contact with the girl had much changed her. Though, the contact hadn't stopped because of Aurora, after all she'd tried many times to speak to Bella when she caught her in the hallways. However, the girl was always civil but very terse and escaped from her as quickly as she could; this was something that completely threw Aurora for a loop.
"A Griffindor's word against mine, of course, Dumbledore believed that git Charlie," Bella spat in a low and murderous tone. She crossed her arms over her chest to keep from shaking with the anger of the whole incident.
"But did you really do it Bella?" Aurora asked gently. Bella did not respond and Aurora took that as a yes. "Can you blame him then?"
"There wasn't any proof! What happened to innocent until proven guilty? I guess it doesn't apply when you're a bloody Griffindor seeker that won the freaking Quidditch cup," she growled out angrily.
Word had very quickly spread though the school that someone had broken into Griffindor and completely destroyed Charlie Weasley's dorm. She broke the four posts of the four poster's bed, ripped up the pillows with a knife, burned the curtains and tossed all of Charlie Weasley's things around all over the pace, ripping through books, robes and breaking his ink bottles against the walls, splattering everything black. Everything was of course very easily and magically fixable, but quite a pain to do.
She had suspected from the moment that she'd heard about it that it was Bella and had hoped that she didn't get caught for it; however, she couldn't help but wonder what had driven her to it. She'd obviously known that the girl was in a relationship with the Weasley kid, but she didn't see a reason why she would lose her temper so badly to wreck his things. Sure Bella was angry at the world and snapped a lot, but she didn't vandalize property.
"Why did you do it?" Aurora asked. Bella didn't respond. She used to tell Professor Sinistra everything. She was the only person she trusted, but there were things that she discovered her fifth year that didn't allow her to tell her anything anymore. It was a torture to try and decide whether to continue to take Astronomy; her heart wanted her to, but her mind knew that it was for the best to start pulling away from Sinistra before she had to for good, to avoid the pain.
She breathed in heavily, her chest heaving as she could feel her eyes tearing. She tried to get her out of her head for the past two years, something that wasn't an easy feat. She'd started to secretly date Charlie Weasley, because she'd always had a crush on him and was sure that he'd be able to take her mind off of Sinistra, however, even that didn't help. And things had only become worse recently when Charlie started to need physical contact, and finally turned to another Griffindor for it.
She sighed in frustration, everything ended up so fucked up. The only thing that she was grateful for was the fact that Charlie had never discovered the secret that she'd buried in the deepest recesses of her dying heart. "The bastard cheated on me," she whispered.
Aurora stared at the girl for a moment, pity flooding through everything in her being. "Oh, tesoro, its okay," Aurora said, reaching out and wrapping an arm around Bella's shoulder. Aurora only called Bella tesoro as a term of endearment as they were both Italian on their father's side; it was nearly the same as calling someone sweetheart. It was one of the many things that over the years that they'd found out that they had in common with each other. To other students she might say sweetie, deary or honey, but there weren't all too many students that she referred with endearments and Bella was her only tesoro.
Bella stiffened for a moment in the older witch's arm, however she was so tired of fighting against the world that she couldn't continue to fight against herself. She'd been fighting against what she felt for Sinistra for two years or maybe more and at the moment, she was too tired. She merely turned around and wrapped her arms around the teacher she'd fallen in love with, pressing her face into the nook of her neck and shoulder.
She closed her eyes and couldn't help but feel her heart shudder and tears come to her eyes as she smelled her teachers, soft, creamy white skin. She'd missed the lavender smell of her Professor. She'd missed talking to her and it was always so hard to get away from her, but she'd managed it. She managed to pull away from her teacher throughout the past years, even when her heart was begging and crying out for the other woman.
Aurora rubbed circles in the young witches back, pushing away the thought of the way her heart was beating at the contact and merely wishing to console the girl. She could begin to feel the girl's tears on her neck and felt her heart breaking. Bella was not one to cry or to give into weakness in anyway and she guessed that she was very hurt to be doing so.
"It's all right, tesoro," Aurora whispered softly to the girl. Young woman, actually; she momentarily wondered to herself when she'd become so tall, the girl was now nearly her height when she'd always been such a short girl. While in the past two years she had tried to talk to the girl and had kept close watch on her, she hadn't ever been close enough to notice how tall she was.
However, she had noted that she'd grown more beautiful than ever before and that the body that she had beneath her robes had matured quite nicely. These were all thoughts that the Astronomy Professor always tried to ignore, however sometimes found quite hard to. Especially as the girl was so exotically, erotically beautiful and sensual with her tan skin, green eyes and black curls.
She couldn't deny that she hadn't been hurt when Bella did not show up on her roster for sixth years, but what she felt back then for the girl was nothing more than affection. However, somehow it had become some kind of attraction that Sinistra tried to ignore with all her being.
Several minutes passed, each woman lost in her own thoughts, while silent tears kept pouring down the younger woman's face and falling on the older woman, pressing against her skin and to the thin material of her celestial blue robes. At long last, when Bella could no longer tear up she pulled away from her Professor and rubbed away the tears from her eyes.
"My parents are coming to pick me up tomorrow, as if I can't apparate home alone," Bella said darkly. She'd turned eighteen back in October. Bella had always hated that she was nearly a full year older than most students in her year, all because she had been born in October. However, she couldn't complain, as she was born on the date of her favorite Holiday.
"I think that it's a bit ridiculous that Professor Dumbledore is suspending you," Aurora said, causing Bella to look up at her and smile, which was something she never really did. She really should have known that Sinistra would be on her side. "I mean this is the first time you've been caught doing anything wrong and NEWTs are only a month away. You really shouldn't be losing any school time."
"I'm not worried about NEWTs," Bella huffed. Aurora turned to look at Bella and smiled.
"Of course not, I assume that you are doing as well as you always have," Aurora said. Bella was a brilliant witch and very strong. The only problem that she had was that she was lazy. She didn't do many of her homework assignments but when it came to tests, she aced every one of them. Bella merely attributed it to very good memory, not because she thought that she was particularly smart.
"I should go, before Snape skins me alive for being out so late. He found it amusing that I destroyed Charlie's things, he's only angry at me for getting caught and not making the damage permanent," Bella said scathingly. Aurora had to smile at this, as she figured that she was probably right. She and Severus had never particularly gotten along in the years that they'd been working together. There were far too different to get along well.
Bella turned around and was about to walk away when she heard Professor Sinistra call her name. "Good night Bella," she said. Once more Bella smiled, her smiles only reserved for the woman that she was now looking at, the pale, half-Italian goddess that was self-conscious about herself even though Bella thought that she was gorgeous.
"Good night Professor Sinistra," she replied, before turning and fading into the darkness.
---
"Professor Sinistra, a little early for you to be up isn't it? I guess you've had about five coffees already, huh?" Bella asked as she came across Professor Sinistra in the entrance Hall a week later. Sinistra turned to look at Bella, who was followed by a very tall man, and smiled brightly at the girl. She was pleasantly surprised to be able to see Bella so early in the morning. Due to the fact that she spent most of her nights up with classes, to be up at eight in the morning was great feat.
She wasn't much of a morning person and she blushed lightly that Bella was referring to her caffeine addiction. "Not five," she said, feeling her cheeks turn pink. The truth was she'd had about three cups of coffee already.
"Bella, comportati bene!" Bella looked over at her father and rolled her eyes. Sinistra turned to look at the man who's just demanded of Bella to behave, and found it strange that Bella didn't look anything at all like her father. The only thing that they had in common was their hair color, eye color and tan skin. It was easy to tell by the mans accent and skin tone that he was southern Italian. Bella had never actually told here where her father was from.
"You must be Bella's father, I'm Professor Sinistra," she said, reaching out to shake the man's hands. He turned to look at the woman and smiled mildly, shaking her hand. Her father was a handsome man, but he looked kind of mean and angry. Sinistra smiled, guessing that this was where Bella got all her anger from, after all, her beautiful face was always shadowed by a look of constant anger.
"Ah, so you are the teacher that she never stops talking about," her father said. Bella gritted her teeth as Sinistra turned to look at her, her heart pounding. Bella looked like she could have punched her father in the gut for saying that. However, instead looked around the Entrance Hall and mentally counted to ten. "I'm Michael Lunedi," he said smiling at her.
She thought back to the first time Bella had ever spoken about her parents, it was in her first year when she said she would be going home for the holidays. She stated that her father was the no non-sense kind of man who was temperamental and that their almost identical personalities clashed a lot, mostly because they were both moody and argumentative with strong personalities.
Her mother, whom supposedly Bella looked like, was a very sweet and understanding woman who often had to act as a peace-maker between her and her father. Sinistra tried to remember her name Audrey Raven? She thought that was right. She really couldn't remember.
"It's very nice to meet you," Sinistra said.
"Well I don't mean to be rude and break up the little shin-dig, but we have to meet Professor Dumbledore in his office," Bella said, before her father had the opportunity to destroy her with embarrassment. "Good day Professor Sinistra," she said, walking away and pulling her father along behind her. Sinistra looked after her old student and shook her head in amusement.
---
For the following weeks, Bella went back to avoiding Professor Sinistra as fully as was capable. She spent all of her time studying for her NEWTs and tried her best to not think about anything. Time was passing painfully slowly and she was really counting down the days until the end of the year and graduation.
She wanted to get out of Hogwarts as quickly as possible. While she had always been very fond of the school, she found that being in the same castle as Aurora Sinistra was very exhausting. Always her stubborn heart was raging war against her mind, causing her body to spasm at times, part of her desiring to go seek out the Astronomy teacher while her mind tried to force her to stay put.
It started to become increasingly hard since the damn night that Professor Sinistra had found her up in the Astronomy tower. While Professor Sinistra always tried to speak to her, even since that night she'd become so insistent. Bella felt like every time she turned around in the Great Hall, the woman who her heart was set on, was staring at her. Every time she turned a corner, she seemed to see the Professor and it infuriated her.
Why all of a sudden was she everywhere when in the damn first six years she was at Hogwarts she hardly ever left the Astronomy tower? And it was true; Professor Sinistra always awoke past Lunch, snuck down into the kitchens for a bite and went back to her tower until Dinner, when she finally made an appearance in the Great Hall. After that, she went back to her tower to get ready for her classes, the first of which were usually at midnight, which were first years, and the latest ending at three in the morning.
Bella wondered if the fates were set against her and were trying to make her last month at Hogwarts miserable. As if the past two years hadn't been miserable enough. "Ugh! Why did I take this stupid subject?" she said as she slammed down her book on the table. At the moment, she really should have been down in the Great Hall for dinner, but she had taken to spending it in the library to avoid seeing Sinistra.
"Shh!" Madam Pince hissed. Bella looked up at the librarian and glared over at her until the woman turned away before making a rude hand gesture in her direction.
"That wasn't very nice Bella," she heard a soft voice reprimanding, from behind her. Bella gritted her teeth, knowing full well who just happened to oh so magically turn up behind her. This was what she meant; the fates were fucking around with her.
"I know, but it's these Tarot cards! How is it possible to memorize the meaning of 78 cards?" she asked angrily, running her hands through her hair. Sinistra sat down beside her favorite student.
"I can't believe you took Divination and not Astronomy! You hated the class and you think Trelawney is a fraud," Aurora Sinistra said a little hurt. Bella turned to look at her Professor and looked a little guilty. She'd never been interested in Astronomy either, but she'd never had the heart to tell Sinistra the truth. The only reason she paid attention was because she'd always been fond of Sinistra and later on had fallen in love with her.
Bella stared into the face of the woman next to her, who was now looking at her Divination book. She'd always been good at guessing people's ages; she attributed that to the fact that she was actually a natural at Divination. She therefore was quite sure that Professor Sinistra was probably about twenty-seven or twenty-eight. "I don't hate the subject. I'm sure that there are some people that have psychic abilities."
Aurora merely nodded at this. She remembered the previous year, in the second week of September when she'd finally been able to corner Bella and asked her about what courses she was taking and why she hadn't taken hers. Bella had only taken Potions, Defense Against the Dark Arts, Transfiguration, Charms, History of Magic and Divination. She completely avoided answering the second question and to this day Aurora still did not know the reason why.
However, she didn't want to press the matter at the moment. "Perhaps you're going about studying them the wrong way. Try to read them for me," Sinistra suggested. Aurora turned to look at the witch that was seated in next to her and raised a brow. She didn't question her and merely started to clear her books and notes out of the way and started to shuffle the large deck of cards.
When she finished she started to lay cards, three rows of three, face up. Past, present and future. There were many ways to lay out the cards and she knew them all, but Bella was lazy and liked to do things the least complicated and fastest way. This was probably the simplest lay out for the cards when one was doing a reading for someone. Unless you did the pull-one-card-and-that's-it thing, but that wasn't going to be how they were tested.
Bella stared at the middle row of cards with a furrowed brow. "That can't be right," she muttered.
"What?" Aurora asked, she'd never particularly cared for Divination and had never taken it.
"Well the second row has the two of cups, which means love; the three of swords, which is affliction; and then the queen of swords, which is a strong, intelligent woman," Bella said, scrutinizing the cards. "I tend to tie them together like a story and this story isn't very you, unless you are currently in love with a woman and you're afflicted by it. Are you a closet lez, Professor?"
Aurora felt her mouth suddenly dry as she turned to look at Bella's amused smile. "We're not having you read them for accuracy, Bella, just to see your ability to remember the cards' meanings," Aurora said, grabbing the book and searching for the meanings. "Well you've correctly stated the meanings of the middle row. Now back track to the first."
"Well that's your past. The queen of cups is a mysterious woman, The Emperor can be a fatherly figure, and the five of cups means deception," Bella said as she turned to look at her Professor who was looking up the meanings in the book. She stared at her Professor; strung together the cards could have been saying that her father had an illicit affair. Bella thought back to what Sinistra had ever said about her parents and seemed to remember that she said something about resenting her father, once. Bella wondered if her reading was actually more accurate than she had thought.
"Correct again," Sinistra said, though her response had a double meaning; she didn't need Bella to tell her what the cards strung together could mean. She felt something in her core shivering like crazy. Could it be possible that Bella was actually good at this and that Divination perhaps wasn't such a waste of her time? Could there be a little bit of seer in her? She looked up and nodded for Bella to continue, not wanting the girl to know that so far her readings were hitting close to home.
"Death, which doesn't necessarily mean death, simply the end of something or possibly the start of something new; the lovers, which means a decision is coming up or rather that you are going to have to make a choice and the seven of cups is corruption or confusion," she said. Sinistra nodded at this.
"Well those are the meanings. What do you think that means?" Sinistra asked nonchalantly. Bella stared at the cards in thought.
"Well if something is coming to an end, then you must make a choice on what's your new thing and that you're very lost and don't know what to do. But the last card also carries a kind of warning with it, which I suppose could help someone with a decision," Bella said, staring at the cards.
"What's the warning?" Sinistra asked.
"In the famous words of Polonius when he was giving his son Laertes advice for while he's away at school," Bella said, slowly, a smile gracing her lips. "To thine own self be true," she said, looking at Professor Sinistra in her eyes. Professor Sinistra had bright blue eyes that reminded Bella so much of the stars that her Professor loved so much.
"I should go," Sinistra said, suddenly feeling like she and Bella were too close for comfort. "Good evening Bella," she said as she rushed out of the library, leaving a confused Slytherin seventh year in her wake.
---
"What's wrong with you?" Severus asked his starry-eyed colleague. Aurora Sinistra slowly turned to her left to look at the Slytherin head of house she'd been working with now for about five years, though he'd started to teach at Hogwarts three years before her. "You look far more tired than usual."
"As much as I enjoy arguing with you Severus, not tonight, I haven't slept for days," she said. It was the truth, she hadn't slept since the night that she'd run into Bella in the library. She couldn't stop thinking about how accurate her reading seemed and wondering what the future held in store for her. As of yet, the only thing that she knew, and was quite painfully aware of, was that Bella's seventh year was coming to an end in less than two weeks and that she might not be able to see the girl again.
Severus looked over at his raven haired colleague, who always held her hair in a tight bun. She looked like hell. "Oh, I thought that you'd be used to that by now," he said.
"I said I haven't slept for days, as you might be aware or not I sleep during the day," she said irritably.
"Care to share what's troubling you?" he asked. She could hear the damn smirk in his voice without even turning to look at him.
"I'd sooner tell Dumbledore and get fired," she said groggily as she stabbed her fork into her chicken breast. Severus raised a brow at this. He guessed that the witch was certainly sleep deprived if she'd just admitted that whatever it was that didn't allow her to sleep could get her fired if Dumbledore ever found out about it. Mentally, he started to go through a list of things that could get one fired. Really, the only way to get fired by Dumbledore was to do something completely unethical, such as abuse a child.
He slowly turned to look at his colleague. "You haven't molested one of your students in your late nights in the Astronomy tower have you?" Severus asked jokingly.
"Of course not. Don't be daft, Severus," she said irritably, shivering in disgust. She would never do such a thing. Perhaps she'd had a few dreams that were not exactly innocent about the beautiful Bella Lunedi, but she would never EVER pursue her dreams. For one, Bella was her student and ten years her junior, to do anything would be an abuse of her power over the girl. Second of all, how much more disgusted could the girl be of her, if she found out she harbored feelings towards her?
"Well what is it? It's not like you're not doing your job. Are you selling illicit materials to the students or otherwise behaving unethically with them?" Severus said.
"You're an idiot," she merely said, trying to eat. She'd previously scanned the Great Hall and hadn't been surprised that Bella was not eating dinner tonight. She hadn't been for weeks. She wondered if she was in the library at the moment, trying to study the meanings of Tarot Cards. She was actually starting to worry about Bella, as she noticed that she was eating right.
Due to her insomnia lately, she was up during both breakfast and lunch, neither of which Bella was showing up to anymore. She'd been meaning to speak to Bella about it, but she hadn't seen her lately and whenever she did see Bella, the girl took off in a different direction. Something that Aurora couldn't even begin to explain. "Are you having an affair with a student?"
"No," she replied curtly. She wondered why the hell Snape was torturing her. Didn't he have anything better to do? She guessed not as on his other side sat Professor Binns, who wasn't eating and as always had nothing to say to anyone unless it was about the History of Magic.
"Have you fallen in love with a student?" he asked. Aurora sighed in exasperation as she stood up and left the table, knowing full well that the Potions Master was probably sneering at this. It didn't take her too long to exit the Great Hall as she was a very fast walker. Sometimes an unmercifully fast walker as she remembered the way some of the first years had to jog after her when they are trying to get help on their charts, though those were usually Ravenclaws. God forbid that anyone else should ask for help.
Sinistra frowned, wondering if Bella was starting to rub off on her. Sinistra pushed the thought away. She shouldn't be thinking about her anymore, why was she being plagued by thoughts of her? She couldn't deny the fact that she felt her heart was breaking. She was going to miss Bella more than anyone she'd ever met and lost. Not that there were many as she'd led a mainly solitary life.
She guessed that that was making Bella's departure from Hogwarts all the more painful. She'd never allowed herself to get close to anyone and yet, something about Bella had called to her. Perhaps it was just that she was bright, funny in her own cynical way, sweet, though she didn't know it, and … the fact that she was fighting against the world, compelled her to become her one ally.
And strangely enough, the girl was the one that had sought her out. Out of all the people in the world, it was like Bella had chosen Aurora to be her only ally. Bella had often remained after class to talk to her astronomy Professor, many times after dinner she'd even gone up to her for help. Over the years, she offered up parts of herself when they were alone. There were even a few times in her fifth year that Bella had run into Aurora in Hogsmead and offered to buy her a drink.
Not that she was saying that it was Bella's fault that she'd fallen in love with her; after all you can't help who you love. However, it was because of Bella that she even spent time with her. Bella had allowed her to. Bella hadn't pushed her away of shut her out the way she shut out everyone else. "Professor Sinistra?" Aurora was abruptly brought out of her thoughts as she looked up to see Bella standing at the base of the Astronomy tower.
"Yes?" she asked as she looked at her, wondering how she'd already made it to the Astronomy tower? She must've been walking faster than usual and gotten very lost in her thoughts.
"There is something that I have to tell you," Bella said as she walked towards her. She cast a brief look around the deserted hall, making sure that no one was nearby. "I have NEWTs in less than two weeks and graduation is coming up," she started out and paused.
"I'm very aware of that," Aurora said. Bella smiled as she looked at her. She looked a little unnerved, Bella NEVER looked unnerved. "What is it tesoro?" Aurora asked concerned, closing the gap between herself and her student and gently brushing a soft curly tendril from Bella's face and tucking it behind her ear. She tried not to think about how her heart was thundering at the simple gesture and tried to not look at Bella like she was the most precious person in her world, even though she was.
"There is something that I need to tell you before I leave and I have to get it off my chest now because I'm going to be very busy before NEWTs and won't have a chance to tell you closer to graduation and so that I won't be thinking about it while I'm trying to study for my exams," she said, her voice gaining strength. "You know that you've always been my absolute favorite Professor and that I've always been very fond of you, which is why I'm sure you were very confused about why I didn't continue to take your class."
"I don't mind Bella," Aurora said, wondering if the girl was thinking to apologize. Bella merely smiled at her, but it faltered slightly as she gazed down at her feet.
"I once made a decision that I didn't want to lead a life with regrets and… I've recently realized that I haven't been doing that," Bella continued. She sighed in exasperation, lightly shaking her hair with her hand. "I must be confusing you; it's just hard to find the rights words to say."
"I can be very patient, tesoro. Go on," Aurora said softly, wondering what her Bella could be trying to get at.
"Well … I hope that by telling you this you don't think ill of me, because I've never thought ill of you," Bella said, looking up and staring into bright blue eyes that were watching her intently. "If I don't tell you this, I'll regret it all my life and I'll always wonder what would've happened if I'd told you and I'm sure that all that's going to happen is that you'll be disgusted but you have to know," Bella said, stepping forward and grabbing Sinistra's hands in hers. The gesture surprised Aurora and caused her to inhale sharply as Bella stepped so close to her that she could almost feel her breath on her face. "Because when you love someone you should tell them, and I've been in love with you since my fifth year."
Aurora stared at Bella for a moment, wondering if her brain was functioning. Had she heard her correctly? Or had her insomnia finally gotten to her and this was just a dream and she was actually currently laying face first in her desert in the Great Hall? It wouldn't be too unlikely, she was sure that Severus would be having a very good laugh, if the man knew how to.
She blinked several times; wondering is she could wake herself up. However, Bella's green eyes were still staring into hers, glistening and sparkling like green ponds of water that the sun was shining down on. Her gaze was intent and her face very pale, but there was a very serious and almost painful look on the young woman's face. Slowly Aurora started to realize that this wasn't a dream and the words started to sink in.
Her heart rate was quickening and she wondered if she was going to have a heart-attack. However, her mind quickly reprimanded her, telling her not to be silly and that she was far too young to be having a heart attack. "Is that why you didn't take my class after your fifth year?" Aurora asked hoarsely.
"I was too attached to you. I thought it was for the best of I distanced myself. It was so hard and it's never gotten any easier to stay away from you. It's almost impossible," Bella said, a tear sliding down her face. Aurora closed her eyes, feeling tears welling up in her own eyes. "I'm so sorry Professor Sinistra; I know I'm horrible…" Bella said, her voice cracking with tears as they started to flow freely down her face.
"Don't cry Bella, you're not horrible, I still think you're the most wonderful student I've ever had," Aurora said as she tried to wrap her arms around the youth. She still couldn't believe that Bella was in love with her. She still thought that her mind was playing a cruel joke on her.
Bella backed away from her teacher and stared at her, rubbing angrily at her eyes. "I can't," she choked out, knowing that she might be offending her teacher who was only trying to console her. "It'll just hurt more, because I can't let you go," she said, turning around and sprinting down the hallway, leaving Sinistra to stand there feeling somewhat hurt and confused. What was she supposed to do now?
---
She didn't have a chance to even see, let alone talk to Bella for the weeks leading up to her graduation. It wasn't until all the teachers and students were shut up in the same room, just before graduation for them to say their last farewell that she thought that she'd be able to talk to her, though she was quite elusive and it was hard to get away from students that were saying goodbye to her. "Professor Sinistra?"
Aurora slowly turned her gaze away form Bella, who was talking to her Head of House and looked at the seventh year that was standing before her. "I'm sorry Tonks, dear, you were saying?" she asked as she turned to look at the young Metamorphmagus, who was now turning the roots of her hair red. She guessed that she still had a little work to do in that department.
"Oh I'm done, I just wanted to thank you for everything," Tonks mumbled embarassed. Professor Sinistra looked down at the seventh year Hufflepuff in light pity. She smiled at the young woman, who was quite short, she'd watch grow up before her eyes and learned steadily to control her powers.
"I'm very proud of you Tonks," she said, smiling at her. Tonks looked up and smiled at Professor Sinistra, who wrapped her arms around the girl for a brief moment. "I wish you the best of luck," she said as they pulled apart. Tonks smiled at her brilliantly before bouncing away, her normal, well normal for Tonks because she was sure no one else would put half of their hair golden blonde and the other raven black, bouncing along with her steps.
Aurora sighed and quickly turned to look at Bella who was thankfully still talking to Snape. Aurora looked over at the pair in determination and made her way across the room full of students and teachers and walked over to the pair, ignoring any calls that she heard along the way. "Hello Severus, Bella. I'd hate to cut your farewell short, but may I have a word, Bella?" Aurora asked as she stood before them.
Severus slowly turned to look at Sinistra with a raised brow, wondering why the woman was barging in on them. "I'll owl you your recommendation," Severus said as he turned his gaze to the brilliant student before him. There were very few students that he ever wrote recommendations for. To receive one from him was a great merrit in itself and one had to be a consistently brilliant and gifted witch or wizard to receive one. "Good luck Miss Lunedi."
"Thank you Professor Snape," Bella mumbled softly as she watched the only man that could have saved her form this moment walking away. She slowly turned her gaze to Professor Sinistra, who looked a little put off as she pulled out her wand and mumbled something that vaguely sounded like muffliato, and turned a small hurt smile to her student. Bella gazed up at Professor Sinistra apprehensively, expecting that the witch was angry with her about the fact that she'd been avoiding for her for nearly two weeks and was about to leave without saying anything to her. Or perhaps she was finally going to tell her how disgusting she thought Bella's feelings were for her.
"You weren't going to leave without saying anything to me, were you?" Professor Sinistra asked, staring into the sparkly green gaze of the girl that she'd fallen in love with. Bella had consumed her thoughts for so long, forcing her to wonder what the hell she was supposed to do about the girls feelings, if there was anything to be done at all. She didn't want to cause her any pain, and in truth she desired to be with the young woman more than anything else in the world. However, as her Professor and because she loved her so much, she always knew what was the best for her.
"I thought it would be easier," Bella responded, feeling her heart aching as she looked into the watery gaze of Professor Sinistra. Today, for the first time in the seven years she'd known her, Sinistra had set her straight, raven hair lose and it hung just past her shoulders. She was also wearing her glasses, which was quite the rare occurrence. However, despite the fact that they always slid down her nose, she looked beautiful.
"Did you cut your hair?" Sinistra asked, noticing that her student's hair seemed a bit shorter. She knew she was making idle chat, but she was still trying to think about how she was going to tell her student that she loved her.
"Yes," Bella responded simply, grabbing a curl and twirling it in a long, thin finger. Sinistra smiled, it was something Bella only did when she was feeling anxious and Bella did NOT feel anxious, EVER. "Look Professor Sinistra is there something you wanted to say?" Bella asked a little rudely, though Sinistra understood. Bella had never dealt with anxiety. To the teenage witch the nauseous feeling, clenched stomach and clammy feel of her hands was not something she ever wanted to experience and something that took a lot for her to experience
"Yes there is, I'm technically your Professor until the moment you receive your certificate, however we're going to pretend that has already happened. All right?" she asked as she stared at Bella's eyes. Bella merely nodded. "I've been debating about it for weeks and I've decided that you are right. When you love someone, you should let them know," Aurora said, casting a glance around and feeling a tint rise in her cheeks.
"I don't understand," Bella said when she could no longer take how long Sinistra was taking to get her point across, staring intently at the older witch. Aurora slowly turned around and looked down at Bella and momentarily bit her lip. She didn't know how red her cheeks were turning, but she wished that for once she had half the guts that Bella had; than things would be simpler.
"I've been in love with you for quite sometime now," Aurora said, staring into Bella's eyes. Bella inhaled sharply, her heart pounding painfully. Her lips trembled with the desire to smile like a fool; however, she knew that the fates were assholes and that even though the woman before her reciprocated her feelings, that it wasn't that simple. That for some reason or other, she would still leave here today with her dying heart.
Bella looked down at her feet. "But you can't be with me," she said softly, tears beginning to fill her eyes.
"I would love to, but you understand that it can't happen. You need to make something of your life, you have so much potential and you can't be held back, especially not because of me," Aurora said, wondering if she was taking Bella's strength from her. As she spoke, she could feel her strength growing and could see Bella's considerably diminishing as she stood, slouching and dejected with her head down.
Professor Sinistra wondered what she was doing to the proud woman that she had fallen in love with. Bella always walked through the halls with her head held height, her back and shoulders very straight. She lowered her head for no one and stared directly into the eyes with fierceness at anyone who dared look into hers. She wondered at how something so wonderful as love could wear out someone so strong.
"I won't be moronic and question how you feel, because only you know what that is," Sinistra said, causing Bella to look up. Her eyes were becoming slightly red rimmed despite the fact that she had yet to shade a tear. Sinistra reached out and brushed soft tendrils away from Bella's eyes. "But you're very young Bella, there is a lot for you to experience and I know that you're heart will heal and that one day you'll forget all about me."
"If only it were so simply," Bella said, smiling bitterly. "I'll miss you," Bella said, before turning around and walking away. Once more she twitched momentarily as she turned away, because her heart so desired once last hug. But her brain won out as it usually did and forced her to walk away, knowing that the last hug could've been her undoing.
---
Seven miserable years! She could hardly believe that it had been seven miserable years since Bella had left Hogwarts and yet her heart continued to yearn for her. And they were a very miserable seven years, not withstanding all the excitement that was Harry Potter's seven, well six really as he hadn't really returned for his seventh year, years at Hogwarts.
She never imagined she could be in so much crimpling pain. It seemed almost impossible to withstand. She grimaced as she looked over Hogwarts grounds. As soon as the Dark Lord had been defeated, she'd headed up straight to the Astronomy tower, not in much of a mood to celebrate, than again, she never was now a-days. It was like when Bella walked away and out of her life, she took anything that could have brought her happiness, or enjoyment. It was like she'd sucked out all the light of the world, sucking up everything like a black hole and leaving nothing but emptiness.
Minerva had come looking for her earlier, to join everyone down in the Great Hall, but Aurora didn't see the point. She'd seen the Dark Lord fall, and while it was a great relief, she wasn't in a mood to celebrate. Who would, carrying such a heart as hers? The loneliness that consumed her seemed to be only made worse and aggravated by being surrounded by cheerful people. She supposed it was because she couldn't be happy.
"I thought I'd find you up here," Aurora froze as her eyes closed. She momentarily wondered if her mental state had finally cracked. However, when she slowly opened her eyes, turned and caught sight of Bella she almost swooned.
"What are you doing here?" Aurora asked as she looked at Bella, not taking notice of the Auror robes the girl had on. All she could see was the fact that Bella had cut her hair short, straightened it and tied into a pony-tail. She couldn't imagine that her hair passed her shoulders by far. It considerably took away from the exotically beautiful look she used to have due to the combination of her long curly hair, green eyes and tan skin. But she still looked beautiful, even more so because her heart had yearned to see her for nearly a decade.
"I couldn't let Hogwarts fend for itself, my partner Tonks sent me instructions on how to get here," Bella responded with a nonchalant shrug and a small smile. Aurora looked at Bella and finally took in the Auror robes. She smiled for a moment, thinking that she should have known that a fighter like Bella would become an Auror. However, the smile disappeared as she realized how good Bella looked, was she over her?
However, this thought was brushed aside as she frowned and looked over at Bella in concern. "You fought in this battle? You could've been killed!" Aurora reprimanded. Bella smiled and shook her head as she looked at her favorite Professor, the woman her heart still yearned for.
"I should be scolding you. I am an Auror, it's my job to fight the bad guys, but you're a Professor," Bella said as she stepped closer. She sighed as she threw her arms around Sinistra. "I was going out of my mind with worry for you," she said as she held onto her tight. Aurora melted into the embrace and clung onto Bella as if for dear life, her heart pounding with life that Aurora had thought had escaped her. "I'm so glad you're ok."
"I'm glad you are too," Aurora whispered softly back to Bella. Slowly, the two pulled apart from each other and stared into one another's eyes. For a moment, it was almost as though they were both going to gush forth and declare their undying love, however, the moment quickly passed and they pulled away, adverting their eyes. "So… Tonks is your partner?"
"You remember her?" Bella asked.
"What do you mean remember her? She married someone who was once a colleague of mine," Aurora replied.
"Oh, well Tonks was in my year when we came to Hogwarts," Bella said. Aurora furrowed her brow. She'd known that Tonks had once been one of her students, after all a witch like Tonks was hard to forget. However, she hadn't ever been able to remember when she had her as a student, and she never bothered to ask. "Did you go to the wedding?"
"Yes, if you are her partner, why didn't you?" Aurora asked, she would have remembered if she'd seen Bella at the wedding.
"Weddings make me miserable," Bella responded with a shrug. "I'm actually a workaholic."
"You, but you were so lazy!" Aurora said. Bella smiled, but it was a sad smile, as she down-cast her gaze.
"It was to keep from thinking of you," Bella said. Aurora felt her heart momentarily stop before thumping hard at the sound and her eyes watering.
"You still love me?" Aurora asked almost breathlessly. Bella looked up and stared into her eyes.
"I never could stop. I tried to move on, I was even engaged at one point, but you were still always on my mind. Anytime I allowed my mind to go blank your name popped into it, and every time I closed my eyes I saw every detail of your face, like the image was engraved onto the insides of my eyelids. I always dreamt of you and over time my heart just seemed to become numb, dulling the pain, but not allowing me to feel anything else," Bella said, breathing in deeply at the misery.
"Sounds like you and I have been suffering the same for the past seven years," Aurora said, staring into Bella's wonderfully green eyes.
"Well we have nothing lose now," Bella said, stepping forward and running her fingers lightly over Aurora's face, in a feather light touch that made her shiver and lean into Bella's soft hand. She stared into Bella's eyes; Bella was now an inch or two taller than Aurora. Bella would make the first move, she was the stronger of the two, but Aurora knew that she would always be the faithful follower.
Slowly Bella leaned in and placed a very gentle kiss on Aurora's mouth, not allowing the years of yearning to get the best of her and wanting to make this the most memorable and happy moment in her life. She savored the supple lips of Aurora Sinistra as she lightly pressed her lips against them and moved them softly over the others mouth, entwining her hands in Aurora's hair and holding her in place.
Sinistra melted beneath the soft movements of Bella's lips and let her hand's cling to the Aurora's robes at her waist to keep from fainting. She couldn't contain the moan from escaping her throat when she felt Bella's tongue request entrance into her mouth before running it feather-lightly against her own. However, the moan which escaped her mouth seemed to make Bella forget about gentleness and suddenly years of pent up passion were unleashed as she hungrily explored the other's mouth.
Their hearts both hammered painfully as they kissed. Aurora, who was still grasping Bella's robes pulled the younger witch closer and wrapped her arms around the others waist, trying to pull their bodies as close to each other as was physically possible. Their bodies suddenly burning with the contact and forcing them to be aroused and frustrated that they were standing out in the open fully clothed.
"Oh," Aurora and Bella broke apart and turned to see who had just emerged at the Astronomy tower. Bella glared at the witch that stood in the door way and had broken them apart.
"I could kill you right now Tonks," Bella said, though there was a brilliant smile on her face.
"Aww, my Bella finally got her happy ending!" Tonks laughed excitedly.
"You mean MY Bella," Aurora said possessively, but with a smile on her face. Tonks laughed once more before turning around and running away. Bella turned around and looked at Aurora with a raised brow.
"You're Bella? Since when am I property?" she teased.
"You've always been my tesoro," Aurora said softly, staring deep into Bella's green eyes, before leaning in and catching the other's mouth. Bella pulled away and smiled at Aurora.
"Che ti chiamo, bella donna? Professoressa Sinistra, o Aurora? Io penso che nessuno. Perche tu sei la stella piu luminosa nel mio cielo," (What should I call you, beautiful lady? Professor Sinistra or Aurora? I think neither, because you are the brightest star in my sky.) Bella said. Aurora felt breathless. Bella had never spoken in Italian to her before and it sounded beautiful and made her shiver from head to toe in pleasure.
"I'll settle for Aurora, if you speak in Italian to me when we make love," Aurora replied with a grin. Bella smiled brilliantly at Aurora. "You smile more than I remember."
"Io solo sorriso per te," (I only smile for you.) Bella replied.
"I know," Aurora said, leaning in and placing a kiss on Bella's lips.
FIN
A/N: I hope that anyone who read this and I apologize if my Italian is wrong. I only took two years of Italian in HS. I think its pretty right. Anyway please Review!!!