AN: Nothing much to write here.
Disclaimer: I don't own any of the caracters written about.
Chapter 1: Captured
Dolores Umbridge wasn't having a good day. That would be putting it lightly.
Tricked by a student, falling into a simple trap, taken by centaurs. She realized then and there that she hadn't used the right type of tact with the creatures: they didn't take to insults very well.
"Near human intellegence" she had said. Great. That had almost been as tactful as telling them why they had their land in the first place.
She had another problem: her wand. The beasts hadn't snapped it, but they had it, and that wasn't going to get her anywhere.
She had no power here. To function well she needed the kind of power she had had at Hogwarts: power over everything. Or at least the kind of power she had had at the Ministry. Here she was as powerful as a groundhog. Maybe less. Definitly less.
She needed power.
How would she get it?
Appeal to their better nature? It was worth a shot. It looked like some of them might find flattery more appealing than what had come before.
"Wait!" she called as they dragged her along the path, "Did I ever tell you how much I admired centaurs?" It was worth a shot.
"Oh really?" said one of the centaurs, "And was this, before, or after you said we had near-human intellegence?"
"I was reciting Ministry protocol," said Umbridge still reaching for one last chance.
"Aha..." said one of the centaurs, "In that case, this 'Ministry protocol' doesn't apply to us, now does it? We can see through your lies...don't even bother making them up!" Ah well, she thought, I'm still dead. Why doesn't the Ministry have some set of guidelines as for what to do when captured by centaures?
"Wait!" cried one of the centaurs, "She may not be lying!"
"Are you that gullible Bane?" called out a third centaur, "You heard what she said. You saw what she did to Hamilton! You heard what she said about us." Umbridge was sure that she was done for. Hamilton must have been the centaur she had attacked. Without a doubt that would do her in.
"I am not trying to decieve you!" cried Umbridge. She would have one last try... "I have always admired centaurs for their strength as well as their overwhellming intellegence."
"Wait!" repeated the centaur, "We were attacking her!" Oh guillibe centaur she thought, thank you for this chance to live!
"Yes," she said, "And I'm sorry about...Hamilton. It has become instinct to use my wand to defend myself. I must repress these human instincs, and try to become more like you." The centaur called Bane straitened up to try to make himself look stronger, and more intellegent.
"You saw what she-" started another centaur.
"Peace Hamilton!" cried Bane, "The humans, reliant on their wands, often make mistakes."
"This is not wise!" warned Hamilton. His eyebrows came into a frown, "I saw no act of simple deffence in her eyes when she attacked me! I saw only malevolence, and untrustworthiness. Do not make this mistake Bane!"
"SHE IS HUMAN!" shouted Bane, "She is prone to make certain mistakes!"
"I thought you did not like humans Bane," said Hamilton, "But this one is, in truth, no fool. She has flattered you Bane, and has gained your favour. Treat all humans equally if you insist on treating them badly!"
"This one is different," said Bane, "Very different. She understands us."
"She understands you Bane, and understands that you like flattery," said Hamilton, "And consider her position," Her position? "She is the Senior Undersecretary to the Minister. She is DOLORES UMBRIDGE!" Dolores Umbridge had never been freindly with centaurs. Now she was dead. Unless...
"I am not Dolores Umbridge!" she cried, "That awful woman was fired last week. I am Rachael Cadmun the new senior undersecratary to the minister."
"See?" said Bane.
"Bane, you're joking right?" asked Hamilton.
"As leader of this tribe, I say, we will take up this human, and let her understand the world better," said Bane.
"I need to go home," said Dolores.
"You will," said Bane, "After you havel lived with us for a while."
Dolores Umbridge tried to clean the earwax out of her ears, but there wasn't any.
AN: So that's the first chapter. Please Review.