It only took a couple seconds for the shot of bourbon to slide harshly down her throat and within seconds of that feeling she was tapping the bar and asking for another shot. "Make it a double," she husked out demandingly.
The bartender poured the double and slid it in front of the lanky dark haired Italian woman he hadn't seen before. He watched as she threw back the double shot before playing absently with the empty glass. He wiped down the bar top while he waited to see if she was going to ask for another, eventually throwing the towel over his shoulder and moving down to serve one of the regulars. She'd tell him when she was ready for more, they always did.
Jane Rizzoli glanced around the bar for the first time since she walked in; it was a little dingy but not overly so and there was a steady hum of conversation from the patrons buzzing through the air. The jukebox appeared to be stuck in the eighties and while she mostly didn't mind, some of the tracks only stirred the malcontent eating her gut. She sighed heavily and dug around in her pocket for some quarters, figuring at the very least she could add to the maudlin feeling in her soul.
Jane wandered over to the jukebox and studied the tunes she could choose from with one arm extended, her palm resting flat against the machine. She struck an attractive look in her blue jeans, white crew neck t-shirt and black leather jacket, while her wild black curls flowed freely down her back. A melancholic smile graced her lips for a moment when she chose some music outside of the current clientele's apparent taste in decades, but then she figured the 1990s weren't that far removed from the 1980s. She knew her choice was bound to bring her to tears, but really Aerosmith's I Don't Want to Miss a Thing summed up her feelings completely.
She returned to her stool in front of the bar and asked for a beer, she knew better than to get completely wasted, because then she might do something to make it worse. Although she wondered what could be worse than clearing out so your fiancée can move out? She sighed realising that it was ex fiancée now; that was a bitter pill to swallow. Her thoughts drifted back to earlier in the evening when she had arrived home to find the love of her life, Doctor Maura Isles, packing up her things. Jane had been absolutely blindsided.
The front door clicked shut behind her. She kicked off her boots and placed them neatly next to the wall. She unclipped her holstered weapon and her badge from her belt as she wandered down the hall into the living room, where she locked the gun and badge away in the lock box in the corner.
"Hey Maur I'm home." She called out into the house as she started undoing her belt while walking towards the stairs that led to their bedroom.
Stepping into the bedroom she dropped the belt she had just slipped from her pants and her jaw clenched. "What the hell?"
"I did not expect you to be home this early, I am sorry Jane." Maura stated matter-of-factly.
Jane's hands involuntarily curled into fists before releasing and repeating in an attempt to control her rising anger. She watched Maura calmly continue packing her suitcase. "What are you doing?"
Maura exhaled loudly and paused her actions, turning to face Jane fully. "I'm leaving, Jane."
Those three words cut through the detective like a knife through butter. She had to brace herself against the door frame for fear of her legs giving away beneath her. "What? Why?" Jane was stunned, incredibly so, she had not seen this coming. They were happy. Weren't they? "Why?" She repeated, choking back the emotion that was trying to force its way out.
"I'm not happy Jane. I tried, I really did. I'm so sorry." Maura looked away, unable to meet the heartbroken gaze of her best friend and fiancée. Leaving Jane was the hardest thing she had ever experienced and her endeavour to save them both a little pain by being gone before Jane returned home from work had failed.
Jane simply stared for several minutes before nodding her head and clenching her jaw tightly. "Okay," she mumbled, seeing no point in fighting Maura. Clearly she had underestimated their relationship, if the woman could simply just up and leave without as much as a word. "I'll get out of your hair then."
She never saw the tears that streamed down Maura's face when she walked out of the bedroom.
"You want to talk about it?" The bartender asked, a concerned look gracing his weary features. He knew a broken heart when he saw one, and this heart was in a serious state of disrepair.
Jane shook her head, "Nah, another beer would be good though."
"Suit yourself," he said softly as he complied with her request.
What Jane really wanted was to forget the last six years of her life. Six years spent getting to know and falling irrevocably in love with the woman who had so easily just said goodbye to four years of friendship and a two year relationship. They were going to be married! Christ, what the hell happened?
Anger fuelled Jane when her eyes started skirting the bar, looking for someone who could help her forget. They lingered on a petite brunette with smoky eyes and a seductive smile, who clearly had eyes for her. Jane gave her best cocky smile; one that spoke of her carnal intentions.
The brunette quirked her eyebrows in challenge before sauntering over to the bar with an extra swing in her hips just for the detective. "Well hello gorgeous," she almost purred, her hand coming to rest on Jane's forearm.
Jane swallowed thickly, her conscience warning her that she should consider the consequences of entering into a one night stand the same night Maura left. It begged her to think about Maura; to fight for the woman that held her heart and not to give in to the anger that drove her forward. She ignored the thoughts telling her otherwise and smiled broadly at the woman so brazenly stroking her forearm. "Hey yourself," her voice was heavy with intent.
"What're you having?" The brunette raked her eyes obviously from head to toe, stopping to linger on aspects of Jane's body she appreciated; her lips, her breasts and her hips receiving the most attention.
You. God, what the hell is wrong with you Rizzoli? Go home to Maura and beg her to stay. Since when do you just quit? Pathetic.
Jane pushed the nagging thoughts to the back of her mind before tilting her fresh beer at the woman. "I'm good, thanks. I'm Jane by the way."
A confident smile as the woman turned, releasing her hold on Jane, to signal the bartender and order a gin and tonic. "Carmen. Nice to meet you Jane."
"Pleasure's all mine," Jane said sweetly.
Carmen chuckled before sipping on the drink the bartender had placed in front of her. She liked the look of Jane and she could tell that she was going to be an all too easy lay. Whatever had that woman running, sure had her running in the right direction, as far as Carmen was concerned anyway. Rather than extend the verbal foreplay she decided to cut right to the chase, "Why don't we get outta here?"
Jane was thankful she hadn't been sipping her beer at that point or she may have ended up doing a spit take. Sure it was her intention, but this woman wasn't exactly beating about the bush with her intentions either. It was her last chance to back out and for the second she considered it her heart only clenched at the memory of Maura's cool, calm, collected façade as she packed up her life. "Yeah, sure." She huffed out.
Carmen tilted her head thoughtfully in consideration before nodding to herself. "Alright, just let me powder my nose." She disappeared towards the bathroom before Jane could respond any which way.
"Don't do it," the bartender said directly after Jane's eyes had returned from the retreating form of the stunning woman.
"I don't think this is any of your business." Jane snapped gruffly.
"Maybe not, but honey you're not the first and you won't be the last broken hearted fool in here lookin' to lose themselves in a one night stand." Normally he would just pour the booze and keep his mouth shut, unless of course one of the patrons wanted to chat, but he saw something in Jane's eyes when she walked in and he recognised a kindred spirit. "If you love her, tell her."
Jane's eyes narrowed and a snarl twisted her lips. "You have no idea what you're talking about."
He smiled sadly, keeping busy drying glasses as he spoke firmly. "I don't know if you're just fighting, or maybe she left you, but I know it was tonight and I know instead of fighting for the woman you so clearly love, you're in here drinking and trying to hook up."
Jane stared at the bartender completely flabbergasted. "You… how… I mean… awww fuck." She buried her head in her arms which she folded over on the bar top.
He sighed and drifted into his own reverie, "I knew a girl once and she was everything. I loved her so damn much, but I never told her. I was never good with that stuff and I guess she needed to hear it, 'cause she left and I just let her. I didn't fight for her. Don't make the same mistake I did."
Jane lifted her head and sniffled a little, a couple of tears falling down her face. "She left me… she's… she doesn't give up easily on anything ya know? So to have left me… it's over." It hurt so damn much to think of Maura, to think of losing her… and then the damn song came on and she banged her head against the bar before singing along with the only lines that mattered. "…don't wanna close my eyes, don't wanna fall asleep, 'cos I'd miss you babe, and I don't wanna miss a thing."
The bartender noticed Carmen returning from the bathroom and gave Jane one final prompt. "Go home, tell her. Tell her you love her, that you need her… that you don't wanna miss a thing. Learn from my mistake."
It was incredibly pathetic in her mind that it took a random stranger to point out the obvious, but Jane knew it to be the truth. She knew that if she didn't at least try she would regret it for the rest of her life. If Maura wanted to leave, fine, but she would have to do it in the face of a full on confession of want, need and love.
With a renewed vigour Jane stood from the bar and headed towards the exit, offering an apologetic smile to Carmen she simply said, "Change of plans," before disappearing into the night.
Jane climbed the stairs two at a time having already cleared the ground floor and not found Maura. She held her breath as she pushed open the bedroom door, the breath released and her heart broke all over again. She had found Maura, but the woman was a complete wreck. She was curled up in a ball at the end of the bed with tears streaking down her face and terrible sobs wracking her entire body.
"God, Maura…" she dropped down to her knees in front of the distraught woman. She took her fiancée's hands in her own and said, "Stay. Don't go Maura, not if it's doing this to you. I know you love me babe…"
Maura's head snapped up and she growled, "It's never been about how I feel about you Jane."
The detective recoiled a little at her anger, but then the words sunk in and an epiphany brought on by an inundation of memories slamming into her mind struck her. She swallowed hard at the stunning realisation as she sifted through the last six months of their relationship. Work had been extra busy, and while they worked together, they were quite professional between the walls of the Boston Police Department. She'd been so tired and stressed and just wanted to unwind after work and God, she had totally been neglecting Maura.
"God Maura… I love you. I need you. I want you. Fuck…"
"Language, Jane." Maura snapped coldly, but the fact she cared enough to do so wasn't lost on the detective. Maybe she could salvage things if she tried.
"Why didn't you say something?"
Maura sighed and pulled her hands away from Jane. "Why should I need to say something Jane? I know it's been hard at work lately, but…"
"No, you're right." Jane interrupted; her eyes moving quickly back and forth, assessing even the tiniest change in Maura's expression and searching for the bleary hazel eyes, if only the woman would look at her. "You still found the time to look after me and I took you for granted. I didn't mean to Maura, God, I love you so damn much."
Maura finally looked up at the sincerity radiating from teary dark chocolate eyes and whispered, "You just walked away. I didn't… I intended to leave, but when you just walked away Jane… when you didn't fight my decision…"
"I was a fool." Jane said fiercely, framing Maura's face with her hands before pulling her forward for a heartfelt kiss. She didn't stop kissing until she felt Maura finally relent and kiss her back; she pulled away gasping for breath. "I just thought I didn't have a chance, if it had come to this… I guess I never really believed this would be forever." It was Jane's turn to look away, because she felt ashamed for her beliefs.
Maura tilted Jane's chin until they locked eyes again. "You've always been the one in control of this Jane. Forever is yours if you only want it, but I won't be forgotten in this relationship. I am worth more than that."
Jane nodded eagerly, tears now streaming down her cheeks. She sucked in a deep breath in an attempt to centre her emotions. "You're worth everything I have and more Maura, and God I would marry you tomorrow and spend the rest of my life showing you just how much you mean to me if that's what it took."
Maura tilted her head thoughtfully before a slight smile curled her lips. "Okay," she said.
"Okay what?" Jane was confused, because surely Maura wasn't agreeing to a no fuss wedding.
"Marry me tomorrow."
Apparently she was.
Jane gulped and offered a sheepish grin, "Really? What about your stunning dress with the 20 foot train and the cliffs of Santorini?"
Maura leaned forward and captured Jane's lips in a tender, loving kiss before pulling back and smirking. "As lovely as all that sounds, I'd rather marry you tomorrow and know I'll have Angela badgering you to make sure your wife is happy!"
Jane groaned and smacked her forehead. "I walked into that one, but yes, damnit… first thing in the morning we're gonna go down to city hall, fill in the paperwork and make you my wife." She quickly stood and reached a hand out to Maura and pulled her to her feet, "Now I think I should lavish you with attention, starting with a hot bath and some chamomile tea…"
"And after that?" Maura asked curiously, the warmth that had long been missing finally finding its way back into her chest. She loved Jane Rizzoli and she always would.
Jane waggled her eyebrows playfully, "Whatever you want, Maura; whatever you want."
Because Jane Rizzoli would never take Maura Isles for granted ever again; she would be sure to tell her every day how much she was loved, needed and wanted.
A/N: I could have probably turned this idea into something longer, but I didn't want to do that. This was inspired by the song Tell Her by Lonestar. Thank you for reading.
