I stared at Alice's small body curled up on the smallest sofa in the Cullen's lounge. I say smallest, but with the Cullen's everything's very extreme, and so their smallest sofa is probably larger than mine and Charlie's largest one. Even for a vampire Alice was looking a very unhealthy shade of white. She shouldn't have felt the cold, but a blanket was draped over her as she ran up a fever – something else that she should not have been experiencing. Beads of sweat built up on her forehead and her face was haggard.
"Please don't stare at me, Bella." Her voice was barely a whisper, and it didn't have the bell-like ring to it anymore. "I look God damn, awful."
I rolled my eyes; trust Alice to be fretting about her appearance while she was at death's door. "Sorry, Alice." I knelt down beside her, but Edward pulled me back up.
"As much as I know you want to comfort her, Bella, I don't want to risk you catching anything this severe. In fact, I shouldn't have even brought you here." Edward tugged at my arm to leave.
"I don't want to go." I looked at Alice for some support, but her eyes didn't even meet mine.
"Edward's right, Bella. Scram." Alice buried her face in a cushion as Esme stroked her hair. Ideally, this should have been Jasper's job, looking after Alice, but as much as he hated to admit it, Jasper struggled with the unhealthy emotions when he was around his wife.
Edward tugged again. "C'mon, Bella." I hesitated for a second. "Alice wants you to leave." His words were harsh.
"FINE." I all but shouted. Edward flinched from my words, but followed quickly after me as I stormed from the Cullen's house without saying my goodbyes. He grasped my wrist, spinning me to face him.
"Don't be like that, Bella." His face had carried the same worried expression for the past week. Worry for his sister's health. "Alice would hate herself if you became sick because of her."
I burst into tears. They flooded hot down my face as Edward pulled me tight against his chest. "I'm so worried about her, Edward." He stroked my hair as I sobbed into his shirt.
"I know, Bella, I know. We all are." It seemed difficult for him to say these words, to admit that for once, every member of his family was terrified as one of their members was slowly deteriorating from an unknown illness. Carlisle believed it was some kind of poisoning, but where Alice had contracted it, he was unsure. Vampires weren't even supposed to get sick.
"Do you think it's contagious, Edward?" I clutched at him a little tighter. He didn't reply. "Edward?" He just continued to hold me. "It is, isn't it?" Fresh tears came.
"Bella, I'm sorry!" Edward's expression became panicked when he realised he'd brought on a round of hysteria. "I didn't mean to upset you. Carlisle isn't sure if it's contagious. I guess we'll find out." He spoke the last few words slowly and darkly.
"Please don't get sick, Edward." I pleaded with him pathetically. "I can't bear to lose any of you, but especially not you. I need you." I snuggled into him.
"I need you too." He kissed my forehead. "Home time."
We climbed into his Volvo and he sped to Charlie's house. Neither of us spoke the whole way, too consumed with our thoughts, thoughts that were more like unanswerable questions.
When I arrived home, Edward announced that he wouldn't be staying that night; he wanted to speak to Carlisle about Alice's illness. For a moment I felt a horrible wave of guilt, as I realised I was slightly jealous that Alice was claiming Edward's attention. I wanted him near me so that I knew he wasn't getting sick. However, I wanted Alice to be healthy even more.
We hesitantly parted with a quick kiss on the lips and I inhaled his sweet scent as he pulled me close to him for a moment. Then he was gone.
"Hey, Dad!" I called, making my way into the kitchen. Charlie was sitting on the sofa (the big one!), watching a documentary on fishing. At the sound of my voice he turned to face me and smiled.
"Hey, Bells." He took a sip of his beer. "Nice evening at the Cullen's place?" Charlie was still somewhat cold towards me spending time over at Edward's house because of him leaving me those many months ago.
"Not really." I sighed and Charlie raised his eyebrows.
"You and Edward fighting again?" Charlie smiled smugly at the thought of this, any chance of mine and Edward's relationship ending pleased him. I glared at him.
"No, of course not, why would we fight at a time like this?" My throat got thick as I said the words. Charlie shifted in his seat, abruptly anxious at my change in tone, probably preparing for the frightful water works.
"What do you mean, "At a time like this"?" He fiddled with the can in his hands as he waited for my answer.
"Alice is really sick, Dad." I looked down, feeling moisture building up in my eyes.
"I thought you said it was just a cold?" Of course I'd had to tell Charlie that Alice only had a cold. I couldn't exactly tell him that Alice had some unknown illness that could be potentially killing her, when she wasn't even supposed to get sick...and then I would have had to tell him about her and the Cullen's being vampires. Too much too take in all at once.
"Well whatever it is has got much worse. Carlisle isn't even 100% sure what she's got." The truth of these words hit me harder every time I spoke or heard them. Alice was like a sister to me, and right now it looked like I was losing her.
"Oh, well, that's not sounding good." Charlie wasn't exactly good with words in these sorts of situations. He struggled on. "It is winter though, Bella. People are more likely to be at risk of catching something in the cold weather, just relax, Alice will be fine." I just nodded, the only thing I could say back to that was that Alice shouldn't catch an illness in any season, but then I'd have to run through all the complicated details. Sparing Charlie of these seemed like the best idea.
"I'm going to bed. Night." I turned and headed for the stairs as he mumbled a goodnight in return.
I lay under my covers, fully clothed. Being without Edward would just make sleeping even harder. Even with him here, sleeping still would have been difficult with all the questions spinning round in my head. Would Alice get any worse? Would she die? Would Edward or the rest of the Cullen's catch whatever she had?
I was only mid thought when I drifted off. I dreamed that the illness had wiped out the Cullen's, and was spreading through Forks, picking people off, one by one. Charlie sat in our lounge, coughing up his insides all over our carpet, begging me to stay away, to go back to Florida and stay with Renee. The wolves in La Push taken down one by one, Jacob being the first victim, dying in his father's arms. Eventually I contracted it, breathing my last breath alone in my empty house, Edward's face being my last thought.
My eyes snapped open.
Perhaps I had blown this all out of proportion? Maybe whatever Alice had wasn't fatal? It might not even be contagious; my worrying was just making me believe it was.
I drove to school in silence - I really didn't want to be going considering that I'd already graduated, but I had reluctantly decided to stay on for 6th form - my hands trembling with the remaining fear of the disease. I pulled into the parking lot and nodded my head at the friends who hadn't gone off to college, before pulling into an empty space. I didn't get out immediately; instead I closed my eyes and took a deep breath. However, it wasn't long before my car door was opened and I was pulled gently out.
"Bella?" Edward stared into my eyes, confused at what I'd been doing. "Everything alright?" I nodded, unsure. "I don't need to read your mind to know that's a lie, Bella." He frowned at me.
"I'm sorry, Edward, I'm just worried about Alice." Edward didn't speak. "How is she?" He slammed my door and took my hand, leading me towards the entrance of Forks High.
"Worse." He whispered, so that only I could hear. "Emmett and Jasper brought her some Elk's blood back from their hunt." He paused. "She couldn't keep it down."
I shuddered at the thought of Alice throwing up her only source of food/drink. The only thing keeping her strong wouldn't even stay within her now. I took a shaky breath in.
"Oh, Edward." I wrapped my arms around him before we entered the school.
"I'd rather not talk about this subject anymore, Bella. We're going to be late anyway." He kissed my forehead with no emotion and led me towards my A level trig. "I'll see you later." Without meeting my eyes, he turned and walked away from me.
I realised he was behaving just as he had before he'd left me. Distant and unemotional. I slid down the wall and onto the floor. Was Edward leaving me again? Were the Cullen's moving away so that they could take care of Alice without putting other lives in danger?
I was nearly certain that this was what he was planning on doing...but how could he do that to me again, when he'd promised me he wouldn't?
It was only when Mr Varner came out of my trig class and asked me what the matter was, that I realised I was crying. Pathetically I looked up at him from under my wet lashes.
"It's nothing, sir." I wiped my tears away with the back of my hand. "I just don't feel too well, that's all."This was the best lie I could think of. I wondered how long it would be until Edward heard my words through Mr Varner's thoughts and came racing around the corner.
"In that case, I think you should go to the sick bay, Miss Swan." I nodded and pulled myself up. "Will you need someone to escort you there?" I shook my head.
"No thanks." Mr Varner nodded and went back into the classroom. As the door opened I heard the murmurs of my confused classmates, but they were cut off as the door closed.
I'd only taken one step before Edward was in front of me looking stressed and anxious. He cupped my face with his hands. Maybe this would be the last time I felt his hands on my face?
"I knew I shouldn't have taken you to visit Alice, yesterday. I'm so sorry, Bella. We better get you to Carlisle before you get worse." He turned and pulled my hand to leave.
"I'm not even ill, Edward." He turned to face me again.
"But you said..."
"I know. I said that because I didn't want to explain to Mr Varner why I was crying and not in his lesson." My lips trembled as I replayed my thoughts in my head. Edward cocked his head to one side.
"I'm not sure I understand, Bella?" Edward stepped back to assess me. I felt suddenly angry, and my words came pouring out.
"How could you do this to me again?" Edward's jaw dropped, but he didn't say anything. "You promised you wouldn't leave me again, Edward. Please, please, don't leave me again. You promised."