Authors' Note: It is to be noted that this fic is made in a combined effort. My friend, "Shikei", can be credited with the primary concept of this fic, as well as a number of scene concepts and so forth, while I, KamiNoShi, have done all of the writing, and some concept of my own. Aside from that, I have no other noteworthy things to mention, so all I can say is "enjoy".
To the Reviewers: Special thanks goes to that anonymous reviewer who informed me of my lack of a disclaimer, I honestly had forgotten, and appreciate the tip. I also appreciate all of my reviewers, and relationship voters. I also appreciate the respectful criticism, as it tells me what I can look into on improving.
Disclaimer: I do not own Evangelion, Star Wars, or any aspect of the two.
PROLOGUE
Inside the headquarters of the secretive organization of Gehirn, a four-year-old Shinji Ikari wanders the corridors as his mother and father execute an experiment elsewhere in the building.
As he explores the corridors, he begins to take notice that the lights grow dimmer as he wanders deeper inside. He decides to go into a door as he passes it, acting more on random decision than conscious choice.
Upon entering he sees very few notable objects. The room is as dark as the corridor, with a few computers and chairs distributed about it. As he scans the room he takes notice of a girl of around his age. He steps toward the girl and slowly begins talking.
"…Hi."
The girl turns to him and stares. He had never seen such an odd looking girl before. Her hair was blue, and her eyes were red. Her skin was as pale as the moon. His first thoughts cycled around the idea that she may be an albino, but intuition told him otherwise. There was more to it than that. The girl finally gives a response to his greeting.
"Hello."
Curious, as children always are, Shinji starts a simple conversation.
"My name is Shinji, what's your name?"
"Rei."
"Nice to meet you Rei-chan."
"Shinji… that's the name of the director's son isn't it? Shinji Ikari?"
"Huh? You know my father?"
"Yes."
The conversations continued for a while, until Shinji is called back via the PA system. He politely says goodbye to his new friend and leaves. As he rushes back to the control room his parents were in, he wonders what they need him for. Deep in his subconscious he knew something was wrong.
The motion-sensing door opens for him as he runs for the control room. He gets in and sees that everyone looks really sad. He cocks his head and looks at his father, Gendo Ikari.
"What happened?"
He quickly notices a detail he had overlooked, his mother was nowhere to be seen.
"Where is Mom?"
Gendo looks down at the boy grimly and walks out of the room. He never told Shinji directly about what happened that day, but he did have his friend and right hand man, Fuyutsuki, tell him the story. About how his mother had died in a freak accident when the experimental Eva reacted with her. How she disappeared without a trace.
Gendo takes his son to the Tokyo-3 train station, telling him that he is going to go visit his uncle for a while, in truth, Gendo intended to make the uncle Shinji's legal guardian. Before the train even pulls in, Gendo walks away, leaving young Shinji watching his father walk away. He turns back when he hears the distant noise of the train. He sees a woman standing across the platform from him, wearing an odd robe.
Meanwhile, Shinji's friend, Rei, steps into the research room of Gehirn's most prized scientist, Naoko Akagi. Naoko turns to the little girl.
"What are you doing all the way down here Rei? Are you lost?"
The girl remains silent. Naoko continues.
"I'll take you back to Commander Ikari."
"I don't need your help, Old Hag."
Naoko looks at the girl, shocked, and patiently responds.
"That isn't a very nice thing to say to someone. Do you want me to tell the Commander that you've been misbehaving?"
The girl innocently replies.
"But the Commander is the one who said it."
"What?"
"That Old Hag is worthless. There is no use for her."
Naoko was now rather angry. As the girl continued speaking, Naoko saw an image of Gendo's deceased wife, Yui Ikari, saying those same words. She stands up and grabs Rei by the throat, strangling her. Just as she does so, a security guard opens the door, notices the scene, and stops Naoko. She is sent to prison for attempted murder and child abuse.
A police car rushes past the train station as the woman walks toward Shinji. Shinji turns to the car quickly to see Naoko Akagi only briefly before the car turns a corner. He turns back to see the woman now right in front of him. He backs away a few paces and looks up at her.
She appeared to be a rather young woman, probably younger than twenty-five, with black hair. The length of her hair isn't easy to identify because it disappears into her gray robe. Nothing is notable of her figure either, as the robe also covers that. Shinji, being only four years old, doesn't actually analyze the woman any past her hair and age, however it can be noted that she is a rather attractive woman.
The woman stoops down to look at the boy.
"What are you doing at a train station by yourself?"
Shinji hesitates a bit, but responds.
"My father is sending me away to my uncle's house. I doubt he really wants me back… Is there something wrong with me?"
The woman shakes her head and replies.
"Your father is a fool. An important destiny awaits you, I can tell already."
The woman stands back up and begins to walk away. Shinji, without thinking, calls after her.
"Can I come with you?"
The woman stops and turns to him.
"Come with me? Are you absolutely sure that is what you want?"
Shinji pauses briefly, then nods. She stares at him for a few moments, and then replies.
"I'll have to ask your uncle if it's okay first. I don't like the idea of being arrested for abducting a child."
Shinji's hopes sink immediately. He was almost certain that his uncle would refuse. The train pulls into the station and a man gets out and walks toward Shinji. He looks at Shinji, and then the woman. He stares at the woman for a moment and then turns back to Shinji.
"Hello Shinji, your father wanted you to stay with me for a while, right?"
Shinji looks up at the man and shifts his eyes between the woman and him, reluctantly nodding. The man looks over to the woman.
"I don't believe I was told about you, who are you?"
"Just a friend of Shinji's. You are his uncle?"
The man stares at her in suspicion.
"Yes, why do you ask?"
She calmly replies.
"By Shinji's request, I am asking you to give me guardianship of Shinji."
"To you? I've never even met you before!"
She waves her hand in the air.
"You will give me guardianship over Shinji."
As if in a daze, the uncle repeats.
"I will give you guardianship over Shinji."
The woman nods to him and waves again.
"You will go back home."
"I will go back home."
The man turns around and boards the train, which leaves. The woman looks over to Shinji.
"My train is the next one."
He nods, then asks a question that had been haunting him for a bit now.
"How did you do that?"
She looks at the empty station in anticipation of the train.
"How did I do what?"
"That wavy hand thing that made him say whatever you said?"
She holds back a chuckle and replies.
"It's hard to explain."
"Can you teach me how you did it?"
She looks over to him.
"I suppose I could, but you would need to build experience before you can do that."
The train comes now, and the two board. As the train begins moving, she decides it is her turn to ask a question.
"Shinji-kun… why did you want to come with me?"
Shinji looks up at the woman's face and answers.
"I just had a feeling that if I stayed with my uncle… that nothing good would come from it… That it would be bad for me."
She nods and looks out of a window across the train from her, appearing to be thinking.
"(He is strong to be so observant at this age… He will make a fine apprentice.)"
Shinji suddenly realizes something, and turns to the woman.
"What's your name?"
The woman pauses briefly.
"That's right… I didn't even tell you my name yet… (He's good…) My name is Kae. Kae Kaylin."
"Kae Kae Kaylin…?"
She sighs.
"No, Kae Kaylin."
Shinji begins falling asleep as he thinks back to all of the recent events. So much had happened. He wondered how his life would be with this new woman, Kae. He also wondered if he would ever see his new friend Rei again.
Kae awakens Shinji as they near her house. She opens the door and lets Shinji walk in first. He looks around the place curiously. There are a number of large computers along a wall inside, shelves of books and records stacked nearby. He looks outside now, he hadn't seen the surrounding area because Kae was carrying him in most of the way.
It seems the house was surrounded by trees. Either a forest, or just a lot of trees that block the road. He looks back in and realizes why the house seemed so oddly familiar. It was organized like a library. He continues looking around and notices more people in funny robes walking around. Some of the people glance at him, then look at Kae, others are too preoccupied to notice him.
Kae walks next to him now. He looks at her.
"Who are all of these people?"
"They keep track of information here. Everyone here does."
"So you do too?"
"Yes."
"Do they all live here too?"
"Yes, they do."
"Who does the dishes?"
Kae holds back from laughing.
"Your questions will be answered in time, after you get settled and I introduce you to the staff… or at least everyone here right now."
She takes him up a flight of stairs into the second floor of the building. This second floor is where the apartments of the staff are placed. They stop at a room with a tag on the door that reads '13: Kaylin'. Kae opens the door and lets Shinji in.
The apartment is very clean and organized, with a large open space in the middle of it, for some unknown reason. The space is rather large, partially due to just how minimal the clutter is, but it is a naturally large apartment anyhow. She walks past him, holding his things.
"The place is a bit out of order, sorry. I'll get your things ready as soon as possible. But first, let's go downstairs and introduce you to some people."
The people in the place weren't like most other people. They didn't swarm the small child immediately or anything. They continued with their assigned tasks and only spoke with the two once they were spoken to first. Shinji met the four who were there at the time: Katsumoto, Kururugi, Kinomoto, and Uematsu. Nice people. A bit odd, but nice.
Kae, after introducing Shinji to the staff, takes him back to the apartment, talking to him.
"I suppose you have many questions at this point. I will answer a few of them now, the rest will be answered in time."
Shinji looks at her as they walk up the stairs.
"What's with the funny robes?"
"That's what we wear."
"Who's we?"
"The people in our order."
"What are you? A religion?"
Kae chuckles.
"In a sense I suppose we are. We are the Gray Jedi."
"What?"
She looks over to him.
"The Jedi are people who are Force-sensitive. There are three types of Jedi."
"Three?"
"Right. There is the Jedi, the Gray Jedi, and the Sith."
"What are the differences?"
"The Jedi are the 'standard' order. They are fools that think that hiding in their little corners of the universe, thinking that they can learn by staying in these little holes."
"Cowards?"
"Yes, in essence. They aren't as bad as the Sith, because at least they can control themselves."
"How bad are the Sith?"
"The Sith are separate from animals solely because they are sentient. They are obsessed with testing their strength constantly, until they are on the brink of destruction. They have nothing but anger, and a consistent urge to kill accompanied by a extremist form of social Darwinism that consumes the whole lot. They are beasts."
"…And the Gray Jedi?"
"Well… while both the Jedi and Sith have respectable intelligence… in their own respects, the Gray Jedi are well beyond them in knowledge. We gather information about the world, as well as the force, and use it to enlighten us. We refuse to run away from the Dark Side, or hardship, but do not let our emotion become a crutch… or a dominant force."
They are now at the apartment door. Shinji takes in all of the information as Kae opens the door and walks in. He continues his inquiry.
"So what is this 'Force' you keep mentioning?"
She turns to him and smiles.
"The force is… energy. It surrounds all living things, and forms bonds between them. Certain beings can sense the flow of the Force. These are called Force Sensitives. All Jedi, regardless of which of the three types they are, are Force-Sensitive."
"Is it hereditary?"
"That's a question that cannot be answered definitely. Force sensitivity is a trait that people are born with randomly. There is no Force sensitivity Gene. Children who have at least one Force sensitive parent are more likely to be born Force sensitive, but there is still a chance that someone with no family history of Force sensitivity be born Force sensitive."
"Am I Force-sensitive?"
"To be quite honest, I wouldn't have brought you here if you weren't Force-sensitive."
There is a brief silence, which Kae breaks.
"I think that is enough questions for now. Your training will begin tomorrow."
As she walks away he calls after her.
"You're going to train me to be a Gray Jedi?"
She stops and responds without turning.
"You asked me to, remember?"
As the training starts, Shinji is presented with a number of different forms of training.
His first type of training was meditation. He sits in the middle of the large, open space in the apartment with Kae. Kae instructs him in the ways of focusing.
"Relaxing your body and mind are key to standard meditation, but there are other applications for meditation, such as combat."
"How can you meditate in combat?"
"Combat meditation is generally considered more difficult, but is actually rather simple. You clear your thoughts and focus almost completely on reflex. When you receive more experience in meditation and combat, I can teach you."
With that, the two meditate. Shinji has trouble at first, but begins to adapt. Quite a feat it is, to be four years old and sitting still, much less calming your mind and body.
A couple of weeks pass and meditation is still a daily exercise, but not a primary focus. The primary focus is now education. Reading mainly.
A year passes, and daily exercises, both mental and physical, are performed. Meditation and education are emphasized, but muscle and stamina build are also pressed. As one conversation went on about it, Kae told Shinji the importance of such practices.
"You must read to become intelligent, so that you can anticipate actions, and be able to perform in more than just the Force. You must exercise your body regularly so that you can use speed when necessary, strength when necessary. Physical ability is just as important as the Force, as there are times when you may not be able to use the Force. And… many Jedi use the Force as a crutch. I do not wish for you to fall to such a fate. The Force is a tool in your arsenal, no more, no less."
"And meditation?"
"Don't be foolish, you know well the use of meditation."
"No master, it's not that… I mean, why must I meditate during the physical exercises?"
"Ah. That is a valid question. I'm relieved that question was your intent, and not the other…"
"I'm young, master, but I'm no fool."
Kae smiles.
"Good point. There are many times when you will need to resort to violence, only a fool like a Jedi would believe otherwise. When the moment for violence or intense danger arises, it is important to keep your mind in a calm, orderly state, rather than run around madly, screaming about how you're going to die."
"Was that a necessary visual?"
"No, but I liked that one… Anyway. Meditation while running is merely the beginnings of combat meditation. It is a necessary skill for you to learn."
"Yes, Master."
One year later, Shinji, now six, begins basic combat training along with the other apprentices of age six. He is first taught how to hold a weapon, which he thought was a rather pointless lesson, considering how simple it is. The lesson included such 'state-the-obvious' comments as: "Whatever you do, don't hold it by the blade", and "The sword is not to be used as a sex toy.", which was completely out of line, considering the six year old audience. By the end of the lesson, Shinji had developed a nearly unconditional disliking of the instructor. An idiot named Vrook.
After these basic lessons, sparring was implemented, as were combat meditation lessons. One particular sparring match ended in Shinji being utterly defeated after he had become angered by his opponent. Both children were scolded, Shinji for succumbing to his anger, the other for taunting his opponent. Kae is the one that talks to Shinji about his failure.
"I had anticipated something like this would have occurred. Now is the time that I need to begin teaching you of emotions. Anger, like the Force, is a tool. Like all tools, if used improperly, Anger can cause more bad than good. You must learn to control your anger. Not to suppress it, or deny it. You must also work to not give in to it, so that it won't envelope you. If you turn to your anger to frequently, or learn to embrace it, you will lower yourself to a Sith's level, and all of this training will be for naught."
"Yes Master."
"I will teach you a method that you can use to separate yourself from your stress and anger. It is difficult, and you must realize that the emotion will still be there, it just won't cloud your thoughts. Be sure not to become apathetic trying to learn this technique, as apathy is worse than death."
"How so?"
"At least the dead feed the plants."
"…Charming thought."
"Now, let us begin your training."
Shinji learns this technique many times faster than Kae had anticipated, though this was mainly because he had her as an instructor, whereas she taught herself the technique off of an ancient Jedi record.
After a while, Kae begins insisting that Shinji take up a few hobbies, so that he can practice moving meditation in ways other than combat. Shinji chooses food preparation, which surprised Kae, and the Cello.
Shinji's training in all areas continued for many years, after a while, Shinji begins to think of Kae as not just a Master, but as a Mother figure, though he never voiced such thoughts. Unbeknownst to him, Kae felt a much similar feeling toward him, as if he was the son she never intended to have, but is glad to have nonetheless.
Training continues in all of these areas for many years, until, one day…
"You have a letter, Shinji."
Shinji turns to Kae, who holds a rather formal-looking letter in her hand.
"A letter for me…?"
He grabs the letter, opens it, and reads it. He closes the letter and places it on the table. Kae looks at him, concerned.
"What is it?"
"…It's from… Mister Ikari."
"That fool? What does he want?"
"He wants me back in Tokyo-3 for something 'important'."
"Hmm… It is probably a waste of time, but perhaps it is worth considering. We should meditate on this."
Kae and Shinji did meditate. They sat there for hours until a decision came to them… Kae speaks first.
"Your past is unresolved, and must be confronted if you are to complete your training… however, it is your decision. Do you want to go?"
Shinji thinks for a minute.
"Do I want to go? No, I do not. However, I feel that I should go."
"There are many challenges that will await you in Tokyo-3… Are you sure you are ready to confront them?"
"I am confident in your teachings, Master."
"I'm not asking that. I'm asking if you are confident in yourself."
"…I believe that this is my only opportunity to test whether I am or not, and that regardless, if I do not pursue this opportunity, I have failed myself."
"…Very well then."
She walks out of the room and comes back with what would appear to an average person as random pieces of junk. She places them in front of Shinji.
"These are parts to a lightsaber. This is the symbol of the Jedi, whether light, dark, or gray. All of the pieces are assembled here, save for two. You need to find a focusing lens, and a focusing crystal on your own. It is best if they are made of things that you identify as your own."
Shinji looks at the parts and takes them. Kae also takes out a katana and places it in front of him.
"This is so that you may continue your training. It will also prove a useful weapon until you can complete your lightsaber."
Shinji takes the katana and looks at her.
"So I must build a lightsaber and resolve my past?"
"Yes, this is your final test. There may be other things that you will need to face along the way. You must trust your instincts, keep this principal close to you. Also, remember, there is no 'try' with the Force. You either do, or you don't."
"So then… I take it you won't be coming with me."
"Correct. My responsibilities here tie me down, so I cannot come with you. I will visit you occasionally however. Picking up a cell phone might be a good idea."
"I'll look into it."
After some small preparations, Kae goes with Shinji to the train station. As the train pulls in, she hugs him.
"Stay safe, dammit."
With that, she pulls away. Shinji bows and steps onto the train, looking at Kae through the window until the train departs. She turns away and heads back toward the library.
"May the Force be with you."
Authors' note: As the 'or' in the description applies, there are two possibilities in this story. Rei, or Asuka. When you submit your review (Which we really hope you do ;;) it would be nice if you could also cast your vote as to which you would prefer. You will begin to see the developments of the votes as the story progresses.